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Bringing Intimacy Back, July 15, 2021

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Bringing Intimacy Back
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with Dr. April Brown, cohost Dr Kelly Bushey and guests Nicole Bonneville and Sarah Ando

Bringing Intimacy Back with Dr. April Brown, cohost Dr. Kelly Bushey and guests Nicole Bonneville and Sarah Ando

Guest, Nicole Bonneville and Sarah Andonian

Guest Name
Nicole Bonneville and Sarah Andonian
Guest Occupation
Guest Biography

The Homance Chronicles is a storyteller podcast hosted by Nicole Bonneville and Sarah Andonian. They have a ‘homance,’ the female equivalent of a bromance. They’ve been friends for a decade and have gone through some crazy times. They share their unbelievably entertaining and slightly embarrassing, yet relatable stories about dating disasters, poor choices, sex stuff and other homance adventures.

Bringing Intimacy Back

Show Host

As we look around in this world today, it seems we are becoming more disconnected from one another, even though we have the technology to connect to more and more people than ever before. Furthermore, the lack of intimacy (in its many forms) is one of the top three reasons why relationships struggle and many times end.

Thus the Bringing Intimacy Back talk show is a show dedicated to inspire, enlighten, and encourage intimate connections. This show provides an engaging atmosphere to discuss and demonstrate ways to enhance intimacy in one’s personal relationships with significant others, families, friends, Higher Power, and oneself. The show will discuss intimate connections in many different forms, such as sex, communication, emotional, physical, health, and spiritual. In fact, research has shown that as we increase our intimate connection with ourselves, our Higher Power, and others.  It will help decrease the conflicts, anxiety, and depression in our lives.


Increasing intimacy for all has become Dr. April’s mission. The mission statement of the show is to provide an atmosphere to discuss and demonstrate ways to increase closeness in one’s personal relationships with significant others, families, friends, Higher Power, and oneself. Therefore, Dr. April started in February 2018 to host her own new Radio/TV Show Bringing Intimacy Back where she and other intimacy experts will provide resources and tips on increasing intimacy in all types of relationships. Audience members will be able to transform their relationships through relationship experts’ insights, useful and practical resources, role-playing, and audience participation. The show’s goal is to show its audience members that intimacy can be alive and real in the relationships we desired.

Show Transcript (automatic text 90% accurate)

welcome to the brain and Timothy back show we are intimacy is real if you desire to intimately connected with your self your significant other children and family friends community and your higher power this show is for you that's we explore intimate topics inspiring life stories spirituality and insightful tips on strengthening relationships this show is hosted by dr. April and her doctor Kelly now let's get this episode of the bringing intimacy back show started because we share with you the secret power to intimacy to create a life you love or love the life you create with your host dr. April is real yes how you doing I'm doing pretty good if I can figure out this Michigan whether you love the beautiful sunny Florida I did a Michigan it's been raining here and not only that
I never know if I'm supposed to dress up or or what I mean it can get really cold medical be really hot I feel like I'm like in menopause
and that ship sailed
well you're looking good I know how you did that hair with like you said the rain except for the humidity must be better there well I don't know what to really good product but can you tell how happy I look can't be campy I know this is Joy you you're looking good thank you yes I got a new look I'm not sure if I like it or not the will see so you know what I'm so happy about today's topic oh yeah I want to meet these home ants Chronicle girl yesterday we're talking about friendship and friendship intimacy and how important that is it really is because when it's off it can really impact women it's it's not just about our relationship with our significant others it is about our friendship and he can throw you off for a while I've been knocked off my killed her in the last month
with friendships they help you find it to you I know you and you know and they're like oh they call you out on it
yeah well let me tell you something I've heard this statement friends are friends for a reason a season and a lifetime well I can't wait to talk to the whole man Scrolls about that
yes definitely before we get started I just wanted to let you know that I did release my second book and it's called self intimacy it starts with you you guys can find it out on Amazon and then the next thing is we have a charity of the month which is American art therapy you know bringing the intimacy back is now a nonprofit so we are sponsoring up some nonprofit so if you're interested in art therapy which helps people do therapy and are together go on members are therapy. God donate but let me go ahead and bring on a guest today I want to bring on a Nicole and Sarah from the home and Chronicles podcast thank you so much for letting us the whole story telling podcast that you guys do
yeah it's we try to be as real and authentic as we possibly can and It sharing stories from our lives we also have guests on and you were a guest at one point where we get to learn a lot about each other and how to break through your trauma and grow and so it's not just about comedy but we do try to add that twist in there so it's long as we're laugh even if it's at ourselves we are enjoying our time recording you guys have been friends for decades
about a decade ago no it's possible we actually could have been friends for decades because we grew up together and didn't know it was the same high school I was best friends with her little Sarah her stepsister we just never encountered each other until it was right
wow I know it's pretty to look like wild story we're working Corporate America and there's fifteen thousand people at the headquarters office and we found each other through mascot that was on Sarah's water bottle we went to HighSchool that wasn't very well now and it's kind of small and doesn't necessarily match our first match as personas as but you know the bougie ladies that we are so when she asked me about it I was kind of embarrassed I was like it's just a place I went to high school and she goes said the name of the high school and I said well yes how did you know that she would like I went there to come to find out I had been best friends with her stepsister at one point and I knew her little brother I've been to her house I knew I knew her dad and her stepmom and so it it was kind of funny time figuring all that out and we had a couple of months
figuring it out too and I think that we were trying to like understand test the waters could we be friends out of you know outside of work but then we realized we had that connection we have to give us a shot you know why not try and be friends
so we ended up going to a young Professional Network event and our true colors were very much exposed and we enjoyed them very much together so here we are
U-Haul really solidified that was for us I think they kind of always knew that we were going to become good friends and it just kind of took that little extra ounce of being outside of work doing something that was familiar but you know safe hard to make friends when you're older you know when your late twenties almost 30 so it was turning but a lot of times people become friendships as up their children or their work was so dirty apprehensive about that too but once we made that first initial connection like we went to the same high school and we had the same people in our lives as likable as she gets it she'll understand so Sarah since you are all
and her cool a kind of what makes Nicole special why do you like her as a friend and I truly mean it because and I say it because it's the truth Nicole taught me how to be a good friend before Nicole I didn't know what it was to have a good platonic relationship strictly because all of my platonic relationships are very toxic and I know it and so I was always brought up to know that your family is going to be the only group of people that have your back and people come and go but your family is forever and so unfortunately I kind of live my life by that you know rule as I don't need anybody in my life besides my family and I already got them so they have to love me so whoever I come in contact with you know I'm just going to be who I am and I was probably a shity friend to a couple people to buy but once I not Nicole and I realized she wasn't necessarily because I could give her something
once I recognize that her she wasn't shouldn't have any ulterior motives I realized that that's what your friendship is and as we went through the Friendship together she showed things that you're remembering special things checking up on you to make sure that you're okay during a difficult time teaching me that it's okay to be honest with your friends about the way you feel about them. Have to hide the fact that you're upset or unhappy just you know providing yesterday's phase truly Johnny Lee to figure out how to be a good friend that's wonderful did for me so I'm like forever grateful to have known her in that kind of my life cuz I really needed her but like as he progressed and our friendship we've been together for ten years together for ten years and I feel like you're a tribemate soulmates whatever you want to call it and I genuinely see her as a sister I do I couldn't I couldn't remove her from my life if I wanted to do at this point stuck so
that's why I value her the friends is just a little things that she does to show you what it is to be a good friend over and over and over again friendship thing yeah I mean every time that she gives me these compliments I I'm so touched because it's just it was me be and not trying to do these things and so I am so appreciative that she perceives me that way and then I'm recognized and valued in her life and you know every time she starts talking I I try to like hold back tears like happy tears because it's just so special and I never feel like I am I am too bad up to the level of expert a friend that she gives me you know what she is she's a Virgo she doesn't give herself enough
all the time so consider that she's the best friend I have ever and will ever have.
Happy birthday months Nicole thank you it's almost here I'm an August birthday and because of my super type A+ Personnel Sarah is a great compliment to me because she allows me to let loose be a little bit more vulnerable be a little bit more free not be so rigid all the time like we have this very complimentary yin-yang relationship that is really easy to see even if you're just listening to the podcast and she provides a very good balance for me and my type of Personality just her as a person I'm not sure if you want me to answer the same question or if you want us move on to something else I'll let you direct the conversation
I'm a bird. We'll see you get it
all right I don't need permission I don't want to take out your show now that's fine that's fine what I was going to ask Sheila you did answer some questions about how Sarah how you value her friendship and that she brings fun out of you and gets you out of your comfort zone and one question I do have for you is what how do you define friendship intimacy how do you define intimacy and then friendship you know me as a person and understanding Intimacy in general has so many layers because I tend to be much more logical than emotional and one area where I can clearly identify that intimacy is in our friendship and how I would Define it is that it allows me to be more emotional be more Raw
go to speak about my feelings and so there's a different closeness there than with a lot of other people
I would say probably the intimacy for friendship with me we definitely had like those fun friend and turn it into a relationship like not sexual obviously even over the home ants we we've had these situations pop up where nobody knows me and I've never had that with people before you know I've never kept a secret because those people never kept my secrets so annoying I just have that that little black with that one person is so comforting to me and so fulfilling that that is what I do like relationship intimacy is having those
moments with each other that nobody else will ever get to experience than their hours. And then also the statements the space of being able to say hey don't like what you did can we talk about it and like not being offended because we're not we're not in it for anything other than the fact you just you know you have people that try to get in for the threesome of friendship you know or no no no no no it's light
into the Friendship have you seen that
or they just know
just know yeah there's an underlying they just know however we do have a good group of friends that we share in common and when there's extensions of us if we're hanging out in various groups will call at home answer 2.0 or so you know we have additional hose but we are okay to do we call it to ease into Kazar first name start with those initials but so in it in people they know that their have they stepped on that nerve and tried to talk to you about one another the other person or do they just know that as well how do you know
actually I would like to think that we are so good at taking our friends that we just had never encountered that type of situation because we just have so much respect for our friends have so much respect for us I've never been as far as I know and so you know what I mean like I think that there is maybe I'll ask a tone that we set where it's like we're Unstoppable is so you can try but like don't write joy and they want to hang out with us and just see what happened Snapchat feel it don't you dare answer April I don't know how to duplicate this I mean I have good friends and you but I know that our listeners are going to want to know how can we duplicate it what are some of the central factors within your relationship those things that prop you up that are
I love that and I think they want to know that they what they really also want to know is how Sarah in the cold friendship turned into a whole man's you know we're going to take a short break and we come back we're going to say how how Mad God created was going to take a break
if you're listening you have a pulse if you have a pulse you have stress if you have stress you should get a therapist how do you find a therapist you go online type in therapist near me then you find a list of letters l m HCL PC and CC how can you navigate understand all this go to dr. Kelly dr. Kelly specializes in supporting people who suffer from stress and anxiety and more you can have help today dr. Kelly
I have I broken back to the bringing the intimacy show where intimacy is really real so you know we've been talking about a whole Math and how you taking French chef and putting the word hoe and man what is that mean well first of all it means that there's a lot of embarrassment that's happened the two of us have seen and been privy to together and we talked about the stories on the podcast after you know I've had some time and were able to laugh at ourselves for me that's one of the things that makes me really comfortable hanging out with Sarah is that she's never going to judge me and I definitely put a lot of pressure on myself to
you up here like I've got like I've got my shit together like not that I don't but I like to I like to have the Persona that I do and so when I'm with Sarah. Trying to wash it away and so she's been with me when I you know blast out from drinking too much when I've done the one nice and when I've made all of these questionable decisions that you do when you're in your twenties and never made me feel shame about any of it if anything has been like yeah girl go get it you know so
the homie has really came like using that word came out of the fact that we had what we consider to be like a bromance but there wasn't a girl version of what we could call ourselves and then in addition to that neither of us are married or have children and we live a lifestyle that is a little bit more of free if you will and yeah and we don't we don't want there to be shame and people being able to make those choices and so we're really trying to take the word hoe back and meaning is an endearing term for each other yeah it's actually kind of funny fun little inside joke that we have where we were at a point where I'm I have a partner now it's been awhile since actually it's been about
I think we're going to issue right now so before though when we were going through our dating you know Ron's or whatever we're at maybe I had a low I was man since she was home and then run hot with entertaining all the gentleman for you. And she was mad we couldn't help it it was so funny we sign our cards to each other that way we happy birthday love me tree ornaments that I need for us together like best friends but they say ho advance
I don't decorate anymore so it's like I think I should give them all to her but
know that it doesn't matter who decorate it's the fact that you have it true but that honestly becoming a home and came out of a lot of poor decisions but a lot of great times that we have done however we've learned much gained a lot of wisdom and headlight experience was it typed it like I said experiences at together that nobody can take away so like that was like the most important part
yeah I was wondering with friendship it's hard to do friendship and work together
how do you guys balance that
we worked really well together it turns out and I think that I'm assuming some work right job for sure I work 60 and 1/2 hours a week yeah most directly answer your question sorry I started to cry Rene Aubry apologize but to specifically answer that question the key to this is that we know each other's strengths and weaknesses and that we try to always think about how the other person is intending for things to come across
so the only times where we usually have a misalignment is when we're either like taking a personal or we have a Miss perception of the intention and at the same time like running the podcast and having a friendship is difficult because there's certain things that we want to share after the podcast so that it is 100% authentic and that we get real-time reactions but then that eliminates the ability for us to share that together separately on her own and private and so we've had to identify overtime what things we want to keep to each other and what things make sense to share with other people first I mean it's been it's been at it a delicate dance
we've done really well like I'm quite proud of ourselves gives at this point has been going for three years and we haven't killed each other so and we haven't we haven't had anybody I was just going to say before we work so well in Corporate America together that I had no concerns at all that we wouldn't be able to do this together and I was you know how people get concerned like if you're going to go into business with your friend to be speaking like half of half of your friendships and under divorce because you can't get along in the work environment but that was where my confidence was the fact that we were still nobody telling us what to do or completely autonomous and he said yeah and so we have had I honestly can count on my hand the amount of time that we've had an instance where
we had to do a back and forth to check double check to make sure or hey why did this happen it doesn't happen but it's because of what she said you know where we're very clear in Our intention and we know that we have the best intentions in mind there's never going to be a point in time where I do something behind the clothes back cuz it's going to benefit need more and I know she wouldn't do that to me so there's a level of trust you have to have to write Nicole said I prefer word on that I also see in dealing with relationship as intention she's always feels that the intentions you guys had toward one another is divided attention. You know you're not trying to hurt the other person and then you said that other great word which is Trust
you're not be like Yang see how we do that I'm not even born like on a one drunken night and written out on a Waffle House napkin or something when he had our true Colours like I said we're exposed I may or may not have pushed a female who try to start a fight with me and she may or may not have brought out her English accent and so goofy level 2 and
that was
that was the night I knew I could trust her with like more
baby butt
I'll let you go and call I know I know all of the field and every time every time she talks about it I just it's so dry I'm grabbing clutching my pearls guys
so there's two different ways to look at this and if you want to I guess identify how we decided to start the podcast and work together that was because of what Sarah was saying like we were having these moments and we were sharing them with other people and it got to a point where they were like so what happened over the weekend they were so interested and simultaneously I was dating and trying to online date for the first time really and collecting all of this information I wanted to put it in a book because I could tell that people were responding to it and they were sorry they were too good not to share however being in front of a computer all of the time like with work and then trying to do some writing and I work late for work I just was too much do Sarah actually suggested how about we just tell these stories on a podcast and it's kind of silly that I did
suggest that to Lifesaver radio background but
you know that's all we do
and their 7th anniversary date
March April March
in all fairness people do think we're a couple when they first meet us and they don't know that we have a podcast for best friends like all you and your partner partner
street life partner ride or die but you know that's kind of annoying seeing how people saw us as that we like you know yet we're kind of like a package Duo situation at this point let's give the people what they want to assume that cannot be that intimate without it being sexual like like I mean truly am in level that you the intimacy level that you have is truly Platinum thank you and by the way Sarah when you turned your head away to hide your tears your profile is beautiful platinum friendship and I'm sure that people try to sexualize things because one visual I'm sure but also just because they don't get how people can have that so we'll be a little bit deeper into that
well because people can leave with some tips on how to strengthen their friendships or if they themselves are saying he should I bring this work friendship into my personal life and certainly has work for you think Ali and we haven't even shared one test not even one kid that's because once you add so much never know
okay well the other things too and I feel so Nicole and I have very masculine energies when we approach situations were very verbally aggressive or kind of you know like we don't hold back and so I think that I think that gives people the illusion also that we could spring for the other cheek again their fault because you know just come up with one way to say I'm trying to think of it I'll think of that and I'll get back to you Thursday you can just say one sentence to them and it'll just can it how do you define intimacy Sarah
I'm at a relationship significant other or friendship relationship level in one just one sentence everything that Nicole and I have in terms of trust safe space that plus sexual intimacy is what makes a relationship for me I'm kind of the whole it doesn't matter what color race ethnicity whatever you claim is a gender I don't care I just genuinely humans and what they bring to the table so
yeah that was thinking with friends you know many of us go through stressful times how do you guys cuz there's some time since when we go through stressful times we isolate ourselves
what happens to you guys eat when you go through something stressful and how do you recognize it in your friend and what do you do about it
there's a very very good indicator that I think we both have in regards to the sending the random text that says is there anything that you need and it's not it's not followed up with well I'm doing this for you so can you do this for me there's no IOU situation there's very few people in my life and I have amazing friends I have friends that I have been with for decades who are like hey how's it going type messages to check in but where Sarah and I are different is that we say is there anything I can do for you
wow yeah that's my favorite part it's some you know when my dad passed away it wasn't even a question of whether or not she was going to be there it was a matter of when when can you come to me and when can you be there to support me and like the biggest supporter my favorite person in the world is there she bought me something so special you know what I mean it's just
having that person where there's zero expectations of you and of them just enjoying the fact that you can be there for each other and you know there's no ulterior motive. That's the most important part in a friendship. We're both also Harry likes using aggressive I like to use the word to rest it so if I am stressing I tell it like I told her this yesterday I said I'm overwhelmed I'm stressing trying to get ready to leave for a trip plus all of these personal things and then with my job double booking all all day and be very clearly just said just tell me what you need me to do and I mean I didn't necessarily have anything I needed her to do I just needed to tell somebody that I was freaking out
research calendar and so I can see when she's going on trips and she can see what I mean all week. And I'll do the same for her in like I guess I've never had somebody who's just like any check-in in Oakland
you know what somebody have to share their locate my location with them I got that invite not like I haven't even had anybody asked me to share my location with friends I don't live near so I've got a friend in Massachusetts on a friend in Kansas City I share their locations just because I don't know what's going to happen to them when I started there in a strange town in a strange place and that I do with those friends but no colloid
but since you're aggressive I'll say pot Turtle just kidding
I've always been deeper
I do usually my top sister oh yeah that would make sense usually sharing location would make sense in a non pandemie world like if I was doing a bunch of dating and then yeah normally I would just text her and be like I'm going out with this guy but never to share his office like the data exchange we don't need to worry about right now
my dad is amazing that's like that is a good tracker you know you don't want to end up on Dateline yes I'm curious since you said you're not really dating but I'm going to assume you going to start backdating do you guys kind of have to have each other's little bit of approval to move your partner into this you know like approval like this is a good person for my best friend yeah because I I was terrible picker and she's my like you know how many and I'm you shouldn't do this or not like she'll always be honest with me about my terrible choices and I'll listen and appreciate the feedback and just continue on with my terrible Choice has taught me how to look for red bugs and stuff too but genuinely I do
want her approval for the person that I want to be with and it's odd because the person I'm with right now she's only just met him and I'm considering that too because of the pandemic and everything else that happened but I also haven't been
is quick to move quickly with him because of pandemic and I want to make sure that it's right you know when it's normal and so now that she's met him she hasn't given you the like are you doing what are you doing and so like I'm confident I think at this point
okay you're right that you're technically prior to meeting him I was questioning quite a bit of his behavior to be honest so even though I hadn't met him in person that doesn't stop me from being honest with her about putting her needs first and ensuring that her partner is True Value evaluating everything that she has to offer because in past selections I I've been again very direct about certain situations in like she said she continues to date them
you know she's in control of her own choices but I continuously try to turn a mirror and on to her to reflect back on to herself to just make sure that she's taking yourself out of the situation seeing it from like an outsider perspective and then for me I am always trying to make sure that whomever I'm debating if I think that it's going to go further in some capacity that they would be able to dive with my friend group and that they would be able to hang so to speak with me and Sarah as a unit because I said the unit is quite powerful
so I have to make sure this yeah I had to make sure that yes she approves but also though that he understands how to handle our friendship altogether because that's a whole different Dynamic and the way that sometimes men have to take a little bit of a backseat or just kind of Ride Along with us when we were spending time together we are the main characters we're going to take a short break in when we come back we're going to hear about these main characters I definitely take questions from the audience for kids or take a break and will be back in a moment
are you going to take a vacation in Paradise medication to rekindle the version without the kids a vacation where you can learn how to communicate where you and your partner actually hear each other and game inside if so vacation counseling is your next vacation April Brown who created vacation counseling and Southwest Florida as a perfect option for you and your partner our Retreats are one couple at a time we have a variety of packages available to choose from including virtual Couples Retreat if you and your partner interested in the vacation counseling please visit us at vacation for more information on pricing and packages also follow us on Instagram and Facebook to keep track of the latest news stories activities or coupons on vacation counseling and Doctor April's other services we encourage you to still have to receive a monthly newsletter called intimate connection
your April Brown. Calm remember if you and your partner are struggling with communication and intimacy and you all are looking for a retreat to connect vacation counseling can be vacation in Southwest Florida
welcome back to the bring an intimacy show where intimacy is real and we are even talking with Sarah Nicole about how mad and the sense of the strong positive female friendships I did get a question from Michelle from New York and Michelle is a young lady who's in her thirties and she feels still alone and she's wondering where can I find a person I can happen home answer from only show I hate to say this to you but join the whole Matt's Chronicles judgement free zone and you'll find a friend in all of us oh oh okay I guess it I'm awkward and loud and people are kind of intimidated by me so I think if you don't like to go out and about dues and public go to a park if you have an animal take him take him or her to dog park or you know try to do those
meetup groups around and see if there's people who have common interest that you share I like to drink so that's kind of where I sort of encounter at all the people that I can, but it's also why I'm a bad picker because those people are baby always the best for me to pick so that's kind of needing my advice
I have had as an adult in my thirties good luck with finding women that I can connect with you enjoy similar activities that I do like there was mentioning however a little bit healthier I do from I am not huge into doing sports or things where I have to throw or catch something and so there's a lot of groups where you can join like to be on a dodgeball team or whatever those who migrated places to meet people that are like running marathons they always have communities of people for that activities that I like to do or like yoga in spin class where I am individually doing an activity and then I'm with a group of people so I can kind of suss it out
and see who I grabbed it and with my spin classes they actually do a Friday happy hour they do community rides they do volunteer sayings so you you can show up as like a single contributor person who may be only knows the instructor but you are almost forced to have to talk to people and so I've had good experiences with being able to take somebody that I've met at that activity and say do you want to let go like schedule time to let go for a walk or do something else and or if you have a similar a nonprofit that you're into like the bringing back into Misty that's something that can easily create a common ground for you to find somebody who has the same passions and interests
so that's my advice but that means that yes it's postponed any you have to feel comfortable to leave your house and do things in a group environment other options to which I don't I mean I can probably go on forever cuz I I am a single person in Virtual wine tasting seriously doesn't one in Detroit as a sommelier who holds them in their people from all over the world who join and there is free so
activities like that you now like in the digital space that allow for you to make connections that are completely outside of your area that you live in and in my personal opinion or I'd be more opportunities to find people to connect with so maybe go surf Zoom I don't know
I've really enjoyed Nikolai got such a visual when you were like I really don't like those Sports and things were people throw things to show me who's asking me about what sports I watch or something with sports I played around like I don't do Sports Sporty Spice here I have a question from Maria and tell her I do that came in and it says I'm crying listening because my best friend recently stopped talking to me and won't tell me why any advice call the enough to tell you why you're not good enough to be their friend they're not good enough to be your friend.
weather fantastic response sometimes you don't want to just bounce because that can leave a lot of unresolved feelings to be a different one I no longer have to feel no but yeah I mean they know the difference Nicole well
from my experience is is this relationship serving you are you benefiting from it are you getting value from it do you respect each other because I don't know what the situation was this person might just need a time out and not be able to have the capacity to talk about it depends what else is going on in their life so if you decide that it is a relationship that is Meaningful and is still serving you and providing a course of course of action that I have taken in the past is to just signed a really nice card and put a little handwritten note in it and mail it to them
find do that then Sarah takes her as a place exactly
is there not going to respond to that then I don't I think that at that point if they've made the decision for you but I'm so sorry to hear that you and your friends are no longer Unfortunately friends but don't let that stop you from trying to make new friends cuz we're out your girlfriend just the fact of somebody crying and saying you know what they're really hurt and so I would encourage you Marie that hurt does turned to anger and anger turns together so acknowledge your to them via tired like Nicole said and then it's okay if you have a little bit of anger there's no problem with that but don't let it go to bitterness
definitely thanks for asking yes you guys had one New Concept about friendship that I hadn't heard but I use a lot in couples time out my dog have you heard that thin friendship a timeout know what I'd like to put a couple in their friendship I was like oh my gosh. Yeah me to disagreed with a friend and I are I don't we don't see eye-to-eye on something but I'm certainly not going to disappear on the timeout in friendship
I personally haven't fully experience the time out with Sarah I'm going to pull from a different opportunity where we communicate more or less depending on how busy our lives are maybe there's just a lot going on to even talk about but Sarah and I haven't had to specifically tell each other that we wanted a timeout but with other friends I I have told I have told them that I just didn't have the room in my life to be able to manage everything that was going on and that I needed a little bit of a friendship break and for me that looked like a month or two
yeah I have treated the same way as a relationship you would and just maybe it's longer cuz your friendship but I went in and how you feel and how it reflects how it made you feel and you know the site is it worth it to continue this friendship with this person or not you make all those decisions first and then you reconnect a really really specific and am I supposed to take situation that friend was going through a pretty dramatic situation and they were leaning on me more than I could provide a end at that point it started to make me feel uncomfortable and the fact that I wasn't being very helpful and then yes then I was turning into a little bit of anger because now I feel like I'm being taken advantage of and they're not appropriately value in my time and it's become very one-sided friendship
the reciprocation is she I think I have a question that came in from Becky from Wisconsin or first Wisconsin and we have Becky one says that my best friend is acting very envious of my other friendships and that's it?
Okay you want to take this one
I think that
there's been a fight I mean I'll just be one hundred percent brutally honest that there has been times where there has been close with other people and I've definitely taken a backseat but it's because those other people have more common interests with her in regards to whatever is going on so there is full of tattoos she has friends that are tattoo artists they can act on that saying on a different level I'm not going to understand it and so I had to do a self-reflection and in the making sure that I wasn't going to be envious of of her and that but
I I don't know if I as an adult woman have had a friendship where I've clearly seen that my friend was envious of me so I don't know if I can appropriately answer the question so I don't care if you have an experience I do if your friend has has an issue with is she with you having a life outside of your friendship that means they're expecting more of you and you guys need to have a conversation it could be your friend is attracted to you and she might not understand it it could be that she's trying to alleviate some sort of you know some issue that she had that turn into a toxic situation for her in the past and she's afraid of losing you as a friend to maybe try talking to her and understanding her background her other friends and then see if maybe you guys can resolve it that way by providing her with I understand where you're coming from now and I'm willing to work with you but you need to understand that
what is my boundary these are my friends and I'm not going to eliminate them from my life because you are uncomfortable with them I had to do that with somebody and I lost her as a friend she came back about two years later was friends with everybody in the house she did the same to me again I said I'm done and I haven't allowed her back in since so you have to be like they're like almost like relationships do you have to be with your friendship you have to set boundaries and create understanding and nowhere. People are coming from like the police like understanding the intent is the biggest battle
Siri thank you so much for stating that and how deep you got and yes and you said starting earlier in the show you know people always think about the blood you know how people have families but I think I could even set it on your show we don't choose our families into a situation from heaven or wherever we come from in to the start I don't get to choose our friendship and I want to thank you Nicole and Sara for sharing with the audience about the importance of friendship to see a strong friendship that has gone through many things and that you guys have a deep understanding of boundaries which is so important when you have friendship and when you love someone is having a drink yes so is our audience about their listening and they want to more of that whole man they want some of that you know you do people where can I find you
sure we are on all the podcast platforms and all of our social media starts with at home and so on Instagram at home and underscore Chronicle is probably where they were the most active the group that Sarah was talking about earlier that she offered up to the one woman who is seeking friends or connections it's actually a closed group on Facebook and you don't have to have listened to the show to get admitted into the group you just have to know that there's adult content in there a judgement-free Zone and I share a lot of personal dating experiences and even screenshots between me and men in Wilson ever really but
cast of fun place to join us and then you can also find all of the link to everything if you go to home as Chronicles. Com
yes thank you guys so much for being on the show thank you for having us up coming shows like next week we have a collaboration episode with Dr April and Zack beaches learning to love podcast on the 29th we have learning to love Ashley, I August 5th Stacks influencing and education also don't forget to follow us on social media be a part of the bringing in Misty back to me already requested to join us on Facebook or follow us on Instagram will you get the idea and it's been a pleasure being a part of your life today thank you are welcome back anytime this is been to bring an intimate feedback show where intimacy is real love you guys bye bye happy weekends travel safely and have a great time
oh thank you so much and you as well. After April
yes what's the reporters after April yes
all right you guys take like take care of bye bye

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