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Bringing Intimacy Back, 13/02/2020

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Bringing Intimacy Back
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with Dr April Brown and guest Tonda and Mike Lawson

Bringing Intimacy Back with Dr. April Brown and guests Tonda and Mike Lawson

Bringing Intimacy Back

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As we look around in this world today, it seems we are becoming more disconnected from one another, even though we have the technology to connect to more and more people than ever before. Furthermore, the lack of intimacy (in its many forms) is one of the top three reasons why relationships struggle and many times end.

Thus the Bringing Intimacy Back talk show is a show dedicated to inspire, enlighten, and encourage intimate connections. This show provides an engaging atmosphere to discuss and demonstrate ways to enhance intimacy in one’s personal relationships with significant others, families, friends, Higher Power, and oneself. The show will discuss intimate connections in many different forms, such as sex, communication, emotional, physical, health, and spiritual. In fact, research has shown that as we increase our intimate connection with ourselves, our Higher Power, and others.  It will help decrease the conflicts, anxiety, and depression in our lives.

THE MISSION

Increasing intimacy for all has become Dr. April’s mission. The mission statement of the show is to provide an atmosphere to discuss and demonstrate ways to increase closeness in one’s personal relationships with significant others, families, friends, Higher Power, and oneself. Therefore, Dr. April started in February 2018 to host her own new Radio/TV Show Bringing Intimacy Back where she and other intimacy experts will provide resources and tips on increasing intimacy in all types of relationships. Audience members will be able to transform their relationships through relationship experts’ insights, useful and practical resources, role-playing, and audience participation. The show’s goal is to show its audience members that intimacy can be alive and real in the relationships we desired.

Show Transcript (automatic text 90% accurate)

feeling lost and alone looking for validation from your partner only to find the feeling of rejection and continued frustration your together yet so far apart now your frustration is turned into disdain and resentment your insecurities have begun to affect every aspect of your life ironically you have now become the cold and detached one shielding yourself from the uncertainties of your relationships dr. April Brown has created bring intimacy back a series of discussions that are designed to help you reclaim what you have lost along the way dr. April will help you ReDiscover and reconnect to the intimate relationship your heart so desires go to www. Bringing intimacy back.com to say and let the healing begin
welcome to the green and intermittency back show where intimacy is real thank you so much for joining us on the show today and on the show of bringing it to Misty back we ain't even help you and your perfect Mexican between resolve your significant other your higher power children family business and Community we give you the secret power to intimacy to create the life you love I love it like you see it on Today Show today we're doing something a little bit different of we are talking about sometimes I have no different gas and dip an expert on there on the show about intimacy but today with me half as more than just an expert we have actually a real couple who have such profound intimacy lifelong marriage that they're here today to talk to us about their secret on how they create intimacy how they keep it going
and they have a variety of different types of intimacy they also dealing with driving cars and I know if you guys are so let me introduce you to I'm a couple that I've known for many many years and this is kinda Lawson and might welcome her as a couple how long have you guys been together
oh now you don't know she used to keep track of everything like that
14 years now I'm kind of one of my disclaimers whenever we first started dating was that I was going to forget important dates and such because well for instance the fact that were married is one of the most important things in my life the date that we actually got married is not well
this decade plus and I
embrace in about you is that you guys work together you know them said yes yes so can you see how did your story begin
well we were both a little broken and a lot broken and now I'm emotional and from relationships and I was victim of a crime and and also we had
aspire to that ended early and so you know we weren't looking for each other which is probably why it works well basically that's a point when I'm at Tonda it wasn't that I thought all women on the planet were bad it's just that I've come to the conclusion that I could not tell the difference between the good ones and the bad ones and so
basically my thinking was you seem like a like a really great woman but I thought that before and been very wrong so yeah at the at the point when when we met I didn't have a lot of faith in my ability to discern good bad or otherwise so I was trying to stay away actually I was shooting pool and she was meeting up with some friends of hers to go out for the evening and they all happen to know the gentleman that I was shooting pool with and off like she's a beautiful woman and she has a lot of beautiful friend so when they started coming in one by one saying hi to him I'm like how do I get as cool as this guy who was this random guy that pretty women just want to come up and say hi to him
go ahead and what he did know was that I was in the middle of a of a readmission program through friends that works for the sheriff's department bi taking me back out to the integrated back in just socializing and stuff because I had massive triggers after the home invasion for pale people for the smell of alcohol for men in general everything so you know I was very much afraid of him or anyone that I did know and I was trying to overcome that and so she would like the least person that I was looking for or wanted to talk to you but you're standing up so straight I couldn't resist Fosters really important to me so as I found just standing there is next to each other and I'm trying to be you know you have some sort of communication I said
and I have never heard that before it's amazing all the things boys
she didn't need to pick up line she was just beautiful didn't really have to say much other than the fact that I wasn't particularly I was not looking for someone to start dating with or get into a relationship was she had my attention when she entered the building where you guys are in different location
can do at work convention and so can't be helped connection so so it's about intimacy and what did you guys definition of intimacy
that did the term I love you anyway comes to mind ya actually one of the one of the ways I've described it before as it is that Honda is the operating system that I'm operating on Chichi the operating system that I run on we are part of it is and I guess it is although it seems like probably a bad plan again since I was not looking for a relationship when I met her I kind of lead with all the downsides to me vs. when most people do their their courtship dance it's you know you got your best face on the best thing you can put forward and let all the all the bad stuff show up later on down the line but not not in this case I I was kind of trying to scare her away so I was like no
I'm going to forget important dates I I don't do well at pretending to care about things I don't care about there was there was a sizable list and I said you know what it said you know my ex-wife said these were problems that I had and I said and it's it's all true and I'm never going to change but I think it had something to do with the preacher I caught her screwing but
basically I'm glad I led with all with all the negatives and kind of said that's that's your list I said yeah she was a bit and I'm like yeah and I'm not changing if she was okay and then I didn't have an answer after that
it's a good lad a very authentic dance she handed me the paper when she was on the phone with a different page her attack and she just said that across the table we were having lunch at Applebee's of time there and that that of course did not just call the fire in any way shape or form as far as I was concerned a great throw you both had some trouble with your lawyer and Gabby but you're able to come together and trust each other because you were both. Then it again yes yes yes and you guys have to kiss my friend
what are their ages
24 Joelle sister was going to be 20 in July
2428 to have you guys been able to keep and raising kids and all that kind of stuff
we've kind of got a two-pronged approach I basically I don't get involved until it's very important and very necessary like I called myself kind of the Minesweeper I just try and make sure that they don't step on the proverbial Minds the big stuff that will alter whatever it is they're planning to do for the rest of your life getting addicted to drugs out of wedlock pregnancy stuff stuff that could just totally change whatever you're planning on doing and Tonda is is more involved on a on a more constant basis staying in touch with keeping their pulse what not it seems to have worked out well I'll do I get most of the credit to her she does most of the heavy lifting with the other ones telling the kids we don't talk to each other and make time for each other
even back when they weren't we still did our own thing that was our time to go sit together we have to worry about the practices and homework and all that stuff at that time it was just what exactly is out of action which is the cars racing through the woods and jumping to the air we're not like that autocrossing is you take an open area lot of times it's an airstrip but sometimes larger parking lots and whatnot you set up you just calling to set up a road course and then you run the course for time in a car there different formats different numbers runs but a lot of times basically full on all
in all cases if you're not over conus to Second penalty so you're probably going to lose mushroom competition also had some and basically it's
as Motorsports goes it's cheap it's a cheap way to race cars although I don't know that there is any real cheap way to race cars
help you guys come together
first we spend an enormous amount of time doing it so just awesome whenever we race nationally have
we're going to race is two or three days in the front and the back side of the race and so we are on the way across the country which is my favorite thing and laugh and make a plan and then work on the driving data in our in our driving and so we analyzed it down lay back and watch the videos of our runs and talk about what I can do better really really good and you know it's just help each other you know
okay so is it pretty like dangerousness as a base in the car is kind of like when you go in those somewhere for me roller coaster. It can be yes
can you get the shakes whenever basically the fastest way to the course is to risk making mistakes all the way around and not actually make a mistake so you you do kind of get right there on the razor's Edge and when it all comes together it's gratifying it's a it's a lot like any sport and in that you're trying to push yourself to be better and then you have competition around the kind of uses as a benchmark and the I don't know I think it's something innate where everyone wants to be a better version of themselves try and get better at whatever it is they're doing so and Tom is especially an overachiever when it comes to their respective human nature together in these cars
whenever we're doing the long road trip stuff and intestines phone which is usually before you get to ride together for the competition one of us is in the car and the other one is outside watching just cheering empathetic
ability to support which is very important in marriage I risk getting in trouble at Nationals when she won her first national trophy I was going out to do my work assignment cuz at least at one point during the day when you're not driving you need to go do a work assignment for the help the whole event run I was supposed to be out there knowing who his what cones and she was out of the trophies in on her last run I just happened to get to my worker station and I saw her time when she came across you got into the trophies on her last run at the National Championship in my hand at the guy next to me my clipboard and said my wife just won her first trophy I'll be right back and I totally just left my work station running back to grid
through the whole pallet people in it was awesome because of how proud he is of me when I do well and that's what makes it so exciting for me because earlier in the year last March I want a regional event and he was actually working the course during that one as well and when I came when he was coming off work he was in tears and everybody knew that I had one and it was so it was so special for me that he was not happy for me so then I was like he'll be so happy and so that I think part of my joy of winning is how happy it makes sense
too sweet Yeah Yeah Yeahs take a break when I come back I really want to talk about how you guys like you broke your leg you said you started off broken and so many times when people start out broken they have no trust and then it's gone. Like having to the stockyard always supporting one another yet how are you able to let down those barriers that many couples they get stuck at we're going to take a little break and we're going to go and check commercial vacation counseling what if my newest Adventures ever make it back that's what we're going to talk about
seeing if he puts on there
okay let's see if he puts on that vacation counseling a video of Lights Spanaway I will talk about vacation in Paradise vacation where you can learn how to communicate where you and your partner series other and gain Insight vacation counseling is your next vacation stay in one of our exclusive villas for the ultimate Couples Retreat enjoyed dining voting and all the south Florida has to offer let our Chancellor's guide you through the rest stops in applications for summer 2020 visit ww.w vacation counseling.com for more information
welcome back on Today Show we're talkin about creative intimacy with Hyundai Mike Lawson and we're talking about the creative intimacy that used to Auto process but I want to focus a little bit on because if they started to show and they talk about how they started off he started off as broken and other words they both have previous relationships platic incidents and so they came into relationship can I see this many times than therapy but how are you guys able to let down my guard to stop at another person
I see yeah I mean we've pretty much laid it all out on the tables didn't try to sugarcoat anything you know I can't be around I don't trust either things I can't ever have in my life again this is how you do all the things in like he said he called the shortlist which is basically I like this is my land this is your list you know we don't want to we don't want to die alone we don't want to have a miserable existence. To share all the joys of life but we can't ever be ever go to say the same thing before so we trim made a pass that you know and I would have never trusted him if I hadn't seen how broken he was our wedding happens because when I saw really help broken key in it hurt and How Deeply it was him I knew he would never inflict that on me
and so I think that was that was really yet I think that we explain this to one of our other couple friends of ours are a couple that it's it's easier to be intimate whenever you know that the other person is committed to the relationship when you are not worried about some negative aspect of your personality or who you are it when you're not worried that they're going to be pushed away by it it's easier to open up when you know what the other person is committed and that's kind of weird joke about with the shortlist basically there's there's a short list of deal breakers and if if you have something that you do not like about the other person and it's not on the list that we agreed to previously and we better find a way to deal with it cuz we're not going anywhere
and in what it really does is it if prioritises the things that really matter because you know some of the things that you know when you're younger when do you think all the little things have to be perfect for you to be happy you suddenly realize none of those things make you happy and so you just have to really focus on what it is that's having somebody that you know that I can turn on that loves me and sometimes he doesn't even love me but you know what I mean we don't we don't always get along every second of the day sometimes we managed to get on each others nerves but that's a different song I love you anyway
that's right just get through it and then you know
when you choose to be happy everyday is a choice everyday to make it happiness I also have to wonder if whenever you resolve that that this is what you signed up for the good and the bad and that leaving is not an option like it doesn't even cross your mind and everything is on your mind is how do I make this work how do I make this work and I don't I don't feel like it's ever been in a position of stress where it where that was necessary but on the other hand and maybe a chicken or the egg thing maybe that's why this is seem to be so easy to me or to us is because it because on the list of things that we need to do when we have a problem leaving isn't on it it's not even on the list of things to do
when did the other things that I notice until I can get some crack glad I know Mike has a lot of music is very artistic right very analytical so I never tried to change one another. That's probably that is probably again one of the one of my favorite things about about our relationship is that basically we whenever we met each other we signed up for what we had neither one of us went into this thinking the other person with a fixer-upper like this person would be so great if no no that was not the way we went into it like this person has this is this is the awesomeness
this is the stuff that's less than awesome do I want it yes or no yes very much yes whenever I met her once we got to once we got to know each other but I did I didn't go into this and obviously she didn't she didn't come into this relationship with wouldn't be nice if he picked up after himself better know she she mentioned it from time to time but I still don't actually actually could still see my lunch box in the background it is not where it belongs and I think he hit the nail on the head once you once you define the parameters of your happiness and all the other things are just not in there and you're not going anywhere so all your positive energy
Kim and Kourtney and that he's doing this I mean that's all that something
right by your many times do a lot of I was just a couple more women or sometimes even certain men struggle with that concept of just accepting a person for who they are and I wonder if I'll so proud of him because you guys came from traumatic backgrounds that you have more appreciation of what's really important person perspective I think it's a good word for that
it actually reminds me spin in raising children by one of the things I tried to remind myself of as a children were young when like if they would have something happen it would be very traumatic to them at that at that age at that point in their life that they're going to it as an older person I know that once they once I get to my age that's they're just going to laugh about that
telling them that won't help anything right now in their scope of experience this trauma is real and it's huge and it matters to them and so remember your understanding perspective has helped a lot and I think the fact that both of us have have had a lot of experience good and bad helps us see things a little better than we might have if we were in our twenties or something bad is really high so you know and
everyday is just so you know and I know it's at different stages of life but how do you guys keep that connection when you're traveling here doing this
I will myself I enjoyed with I'm obviously married to a beautiful woman and her line of business has her interacting with high-powered Alpha Types on a regular basis and it's probably a little bit of a miracle after my past relationship that that it doesn't make me nervous in a lease because I trust her and I know I can't so whenever we're in and she knows that she doesn't have to worry about me so whenever we're apart don't have anything gnawing at you other than missing the other person died in the first 5 years is I am today I hope that I like I said I really did feel left out sometimes when I was going to Hodges
you know all the time I said I had to step away from autocrossing I step away from going to the tail
and I had to sacrifice all other things to get to this next stage in life that we needed me to get to and that was hard for me because nothing really was going to get us where we want to go for a lifetime for me and it was the only thing that was all the things shortlist knowing that you always going to be here in this was only a small piece of soap
I mean I'm crazy but you know how much he loves me and how do I be a lot of couples we are pulling them away from their family and their kids and as a partner sometimes Partners feel left out the person's going to be successful leave me behind and put his struggling trying to do everything you're thinking I'm missing out and then yeah that is very how do you keep the day now and they're in that predicament that you keep the hope and make sure that the time you spent is quality time with your family
for me it was the balance has not existed then so I always try to say it's got to be about the harmony to where you can understand this then the day when you put all the pieces to the state song of life like work or whatever has to be 90% and you only get 10% but that's 10% going to be really quality so maybe Mike and I would jump in the car and drive over to the other coast and get an ice cream cone in front around and drive back
the way to Everglades City and then turn around and come right back but what it was together in the car or we were doing what we do just being together having fun singing to me you know just talking about life and no other distractions and even though it's a real small piece of time and I think it helps to also know that whenever cuz I I could I could feel the disconnection during that time and I felt a little a little helpless cuz I I couldn't take any test for I could I couldn't make anything work like I couldn't climb the mountains for her that she was climbing
but if it it just goes going back to the awareness of the commitment from the other person she newsad it that while we weren't together as much as we wanted to be that I wasn't going anywhere I was going to be choosing to write where to find me whenever she has some time
and I would be right there yeah yeah so Mike's on your prospective you are really a great awesome cheerleader and you're always supporting her and stuff yet how did you learn at the Mansion to do that because I come from childhood are you at the bugs are biting I think it's just a byproduct of the fact that I have a tendency to think out loud and I don't have much of a filter most of the time with such an awesome wife it's just good stuff but every now and then I say stuff that she wishes I had a good with the bad
cheerleading thing is primarily and I don't I don't mean to sound campus at the word but I mean she is an abnormally awesome person she is she's like jokes that smart and pretty cuz you can get any guy's attention if you're smart and pretty she is really pretty and she is crazy smart like she hates to for me to ever talk about the fact that I've ever dated anyone other than her but I have dated women before that I thought were probably smarter than me I hadn't she is the only woman I've ever been with where there's just no question you just way smarter than me like 5 Mile and I'm okay with that
but she said it's not difficult to be a cheerleader when you have a team like this to cheer for me like that your secure you yes
is extremely hard and I don't know that that I'm smarter for sure but I know it was smart enough to make sure that he fell in love with me and stay with me forever so I've actually I'm going to be just our short list but then as far as the awesome list for me it's pretty short Honda has a very long list of things she does extremely well there's a few things that I do really well and while I'm doing them I'm awesome but it's it's funny though cuz as soon as you move me like a few degrees to the left or to the right you're like where did you find this idiot you have a lot of things
yes in the great thing about you guys is that you guys use a lot of good humor which is really great yes yes yes yes and then you guys are besides autocrossing you guys do a lot of different things together yeah yes and I think you're even starting a new project I would love you for you to talk about the foundations that you're you're doing and let the audience know how to connect with you and get more information about those two foundation so you can take it away
all right I think you're up I was your to your live
we have a new project a couple of that one being winning at life today which is really just started out as a project up in the mountains when we were at the Tail of the Dragon that one of our road trip and I kept finding pennies I found 11 pennies in a day on one and they said you know the thing is is that you know when you find them heads up people think oh-so I'm going to have a better day but if you find them touchdown then later I don't know the world's going over the next person that finds it cuz you made them have a nice day so it started there and then we were walking at an autocross we were added one of those are competitors and friend said that we were winning and he said no you guys are winning at life and we became we have several people that fall
couple goals in a lot of people just pointing out the fact that we have this figured out compared to a lot of people and we are living our best best cells are happy and grateful and we're just really making it work and I think you know we started sharing more about that and I started dating all these you know ways that I thought we could inspire people and motivate people to find that for themselves and West Side social media following for the today Project I have a daily inspiration email that you can sign up to receive that's really awesome so
other friends into it now its blooms into where I call it planting seeds of positivity gratitude and find him and what I'm really doing is trying to help people make their own impact on themselves on the people they love on their communities and and I want to be sort of the place for wedding plans to see I have friends that are getting involved during their aspect of our daughter-in-laws she's an artist of motor art with my daughter has a company that she does on the sides does that we know people that are in sports that one mic is gone up on stimulator streaming aspect of it so we're trying to help and encourage
shoot yes and they were trying to you know we're trying to create a place where other people as they hate this is how I went like like the way I do it is not what somebody else may not want to do auto fussing at all but they might be like maybe my bird watching or whatever else is the way I'm going to win it like today and that's okay share it and and help other people do it too so we're looking at you know just starting and and seeing how how much it can grow and awesome so on your website and on your social media is winning at life today to know what exactly does winning at life today actually me
alive people problems are good ones to have and it should start their you're winning at life today they're just need to use that platform to show your gratitude communities world with all the greatness that you have in you you know if Mike hasn't started singing Because I called him to all of that musical genius that he tried all of that that God gave him would still be inside of him and he would have never shared that with the world and I don't want people to go about existing in life and not realize there's a place to let out their Joy I just feel like you all have a joy and and we should let it out
wonderful yeah yeah I can sell as we are on to the third part of this broadcast here is where we give tips to couples and started hearing you guys came together had two little piece of paper or whatever so here's my prose is my Pros use my car is in my car and now look at what you develop helping not only other couples but individuals at winning at life through that so I took her out there listening or even individual what is some chips then you guys can help the people are struggling in developing intimate connection with their significant other or even with themselves and not getting the things out of life that they were what is contempt
what more for the person that you love to be happy make that your priority make whatever it is that makes them happy make that your joy because if you truly in your heart want that person to be there perfect person they're perfect cells they're winning at life today self then you're going to be fulfilled they're going to be fulfilled and and you have a connection messages and there's a bit of an art to it to Honda has made it look easier than I think it could be for many people in that in that there's probably some aspects of me that I would be happier with if I just did it X Y and Z way and she can see this from the outside looking in would rather than take a crowbar and beat me over the head with it going to do this do this do this she just know just a little bit here and there and and she's she's also done a really good job and it's kind of funny
he kind of brings back to driving my best driving comes whenever I'm interacting with the vehicle instead of making demands of it and I'm just really good with me about about interacting with me whenever she thinks she sees something that if I were doing it differently or trying something new that she thinks I would enjoy she's really good of interacting with me rather than just saying you need to do this or do that because cuz I do I think it would probably be very easy it's just human nature it's where you think you you can see something that the other person know the person you're with doesn't see and you know they'd be better off if they would just do X but if you try and force it you can actually create more trouble or problems
so one thing that Todd has been really good at with me is that she's managed to to to show me that I can I can be happier than I even thought I could be without beating me over the head with a happy stick for lack of a better way to put it like she's she and there's there's some things like this is Twitch thing there's been a few things that you said I should probably try this or try that or expand my horizons but not all of it away fans out sometimes I started them like this is just too much and she doesn't Force Square pegs into round holes
pretty good about it so I do think that that in her advice to once the give the person you're with to be happy how you do it matters to think you guys have been talking all the way through and you actually use the words just now it's the interaction
yes and even in the create and to maintain a strong bond it's about interaction not just that she said blocking orders or yes that the other and she's she's accepted that that being right cuz she is usually right being right in and of itself is not enough if you know that you got to find a way to make it work right right so I'm like for my husband perspective what are some other ways to help couples increase intimacy always felt that Honda was the thing that makes everything work in a relationship and that I was just lucky to have signed up for this trip that she's been taking a song so it is I feel under-qualified trying to tell men I mean basically my best advice is go find another Tonda good luck by the way
and you're good so one of the things that I did I think I do well though it is is that I I recognize the stuff I should appreciate about her I don't take her for granted and I make sure that she knows that I don't take her for granted
and it's aside from that and you're honest to me and you just great things over the years like he's my fashion advisor gas it but that best yes part of that is actually being able to see if she's able to accept that I'm honest when I tell her she's beautiful it's because she's beautiful not because I just want her to feel better so whenever she started messing with the Stitch fit I think it was she try some outfits on them like honey you look like an old woman is trying too hard send it back to work like you look good now you should keep that but yeah like it when she asked me for an opinion she's ready for my opinion she doesn't she's not looking for me to just say something to make her happy she wants to know yes no maybe so whatever and then so when I give her the truth so you can actually handle it she doesn't get angry with me for it when it's not a truth she's looking for
she'll talk about the five love language and one of them is words of affirmation and you did really good job of providing her with a lot of words of affirmation and you said your authentic with it which is kind of the basis of your relationship formation would serve much of a purpose if she never once thought I was just making it up as I went along like if she has to know that that's if she's having a bad hair day or if she's no she's got an outfit on it's not particularly flattering I'm not just going to come tell her hey look that's an awesome Outfitter great dress or whatever if I tell her something she needs to know that it's true
he is my rock and all of what I build my confidence on to go out and find this mountain because I know that his faith in me his honesty and all of the things that he build me up with I can go out and sent them to the world is authentic because I believe in his in his honesty
great yes and now that you two are are you guys empty-nesters now I think with no kids
we are all that we have a lot of great and kids that come stay with us now
what are the things I see sometimes it's couples who get who are on empty nesters
before they sell the Kinect because of their kids but once the kids are gone they have no connection and one of the good reasons why I had you guys done because you guys up find something to connect on and more than one thing you connect on a variety of thing yes how do you guys manage child that she manages it I just watch her information we make a choice
Institute to do our thing together we have are one of the great things about us is that the we have our time together and we respect and make sure that we allow in our schedules the time that each other has things that the other one doesn't want to do so that they can go and do that because they both of us right we don't make each other do things the other doesn't really want to do one of the things that I that I brag to my friends about with tando is that is the way she doesn't drag me to things like she has a lot of function she has to go through out go to throughout the course of a year and she doesn't she doesn't drag me and demanded I go to all these things and it's very rare every now and then it's necessary that I show up but because she doesn't
wear it out or play that card all the time when she tells me that I need to put on a suit and go somewhere I just go like cuz she's not I get the impression sometimes although it's been awhile since I've heard one of these sad stories is that someone's spouse seems to gauge how much they are loved by that spouse by how much they're willing to suffer like they know their spouse doesn't want to go to such-and-such event they know that they going to be miserable the whole time if they insisted they go and in the back of my head I'm thinking maybe they just they're telling someone how much you know Bob is willing to suffer to be with me he must really love me but I don't think that's a good way to to nail down if someone else is in love with you look how much they'll suffer for me know that it's not a good plan to be stopping my book and she said she doesn't do that she doesn't seem to want to measure how much I love her by how much I will suffer for her
yeah so and I really like how you you put that we shouldn't try to make up partner suffer and the constant thing in here it's just being authentic yep yep yep yes that each of you know what each of you like and so the other things that I see with couples and sometimes they always try to do everything together and I'm so happy that you guys have certain things that she wants to do where I'm like do I need to be there she's like no no actually you should not be there I had season tickets to Denver driving simulator or doing something else and so if I know that I'm happy and I'm watching a live play and keep in the singular he's happy then it's just the wind
yes definitely yes yes yes well thank you guys so much for being at the show Hyundai can you tell us again where we can find information about your two projects and how to contact you guys and Mike I didn't even get a chance for you to talk about all your music thing so yeah take it away today. Com or on Facebook or Instagram at winning a life today and then my switch handle is the one and only with the letter N right honey and then 17024 s o n l y 172 on Twitch because you are so I'm not standing can you tell us a little bit about your music so interested to hear
okay you know basically the thing about the thing about production music at what I've got is a is a pretty good to hear my voice I actually think is not particularly interesting but but whenever you sing like this might that I'm using right now I've done a bunch of stuff just on Audacity for Tonda basically I guess the best way I can sum it up is she's got about eight or nine songs that I've done for her but I have attempted like 30 and the reason she doesn't have 30 songs is because most of them sounded terrible nine of them nine of them sounded pretty good so yeah it's for you online and I can prove to you how people are wanting to listen to those eight or nine songs or you know because you you are so and I didn't realize you're so inspirational so
where can I find the website they're going to be on the website uploaded links to those this weekend and make sure those are available and let me tell you April I can't tell you how many times I have driven from one client meeting to another and I listen in the car so song over and over by the time I get there I have completely listed my confidence I have turned my email last negative meeting maybe something was wrong somebody had a horrible Problem whatever they were stressed out over somebody was telling me about a horrible medical problem they had in and it's just everything in health insurance you know there's a negative aspects to it and it really starts to weigh on you insulate being able to have him with me in the car during the day to go from those appointments and completely turn my attitude in my world around
did I can go into the next meeting with baggage and and despair from the last meeting has been invaluable to me over the years I can't thank him enough for all right space my heart awesome cuz Mike things and you write a rap to actually write better than I speak the thing although it's because I can't rap like I mean because I can try. I don't do freestyle anything like that it's usually just other people stuff that I've heard a grown-up okay awesome yes yes yes I wish you to a wonderful happy Valentines and thank you guys so much for being on the show and Enlighten us enters your life and get a little understanding and hopefully that it helped millions of tacos out there thank you guys so much for being on that thing and intimacy back show
bye bye bye