Nicole Brandon and welcome to unlimited life we have such a special and extraordinary show for you today today we are here and it isn't Valentine's Day is the day where people are declaring their love sharing their love and longing for love and to bring you the experts from around the world that had the very best keys and tools and techniques to truly live in an unlimited and unbridled life and today's guest is exactly that we are so grateful today to be able to have Lisa rose with us and Lisa road is the founder of deeper love that our sex she is highly sought after as a relationship coach and she specializes in working with successful women who are thrive

either cruise but they're striking out in love and how many of us know those women as well as with couples who are really ready this point to discover deeper Love by juice your loss of function X just one that's mesh together a tapestry of love and that fairy tale lights that was a happily ever after that we always have dreamed about and she has a private practice and she has guided hundreds and hundreds of single women and couples on the journey to deeper lesson better sex I can't wait to hear this conversation and today was really looking at what does it mean to have that kind of relationship that unlimited that kind of relationship do we always knew was possible and so it's a great privilege and pleasure to introduce today's guest at least the rez Lisa welcome to the show

thank you Nicole gray to be here with you today so that you're here and I think it's just such a perfect perfect and I guess my first question is a question I always loved to ask my gas and that's the did you know question like when you were six and seven and eight and a little girl were you able to help people were you guiding people is that something that's been dating you always or is it something that you grew to discover

it really speaks to I am so often aware when I work with people that none of us were handed a very user-friendly relationship toolkit or a manual that Lisa has to learn by Discovery and a lot of trial and error and often I think of myself as somebody because I've been most of my life Gathering and growing and expanding his tool kit and then I have kind of its Arsenal to share so I would say that what what point in me on this road is I always had a very deep yearning for a for connection I'm not introverted I'm not really didn't like to spend a lot of time by myself as a kid took connection and relationship was something that I was drawn toward and and motivated by

and I was at

you know I had a lot of energy I remember one of my first spoken and we'll use phrases you're not the boss of me so you know I was like I was I was declaring what kind were going to be for a relationship pretty early on I did not like to be bossed around or told what to do and you know fortunately my family gave me a lot of room in a lot of space to to basically be myself and they didn't try to squash me but they're also wasn't a lot of modeling and a lot of you know there's so many great things that parents have at their disposal now for really coming into a deeper relationship both with each other and also with their children

so I would say that you know know I learned through Discovery but I also learned by really recognizing what wasn't working for me and at a certain point you know I had enough history of this relationship to say am I really getting what I want here am I really creating the kind of relationship that feels really great to be in and I mean like I could say a lot more about that but I'll pause here in answer to your question no

I appreciate it I mean you know the typical age Saturday morning I went to mine and it's the first time every checkout counter and so why do you think there's so much weight on Valentine's Day

what Justice is serving irony that in this culture we hold it up with all the another Hallmark in the balloons and and all of those things but there really isn't a lot of attention given to this is how you create functional healthy thriving relationship so Valentine's Day has no it's a great day to sell products and and to create a certain amount of drive and desire but I think it also really speaks to underneath all that we are wired for connection we're wired for love you know that's that's what we're made of and unfortunately there's things that get in the way of our capacity to be open to feel connected to be really authentic to take the chit to feel like our heart can whether another another chance until I think of Love is often it is to fold it's it's really learning a set of skills so that we have tools at our disposal so that when we hit bumps

we have ways to navigate them that bring us closer into connection rather than further away but he's also chipping away at the places that leave a scared or afraid or doubting until Valentine's Day is kind of a reminder of how important that is and also I think how possible if he comes when we have when we have tools I like to say it's like if somebody said to you okay here's a hammer and hear the screwdriver now go build a house the expectation it's like we're just thrown out into the world most of us what we learn from our parents parents are caretakers isn't necessarily stuff that we want a model you know there are exceptions to that but a lot of times we're just kind of left on her own and the good news is in this day and age there is no shortage of resources you know there's so many books and coaches and workshops

and I like to think of you know I'm just kind of doing my part but there really isn't much excuse anymore for having to suffer in the same ways that either our parents did other Generations did or even we might have earlier in in our life

that's such a great answer I mean truly and I know and looking at your bio I mean I could enter therapist and I think that we forget that we're human beings you know sometimes that I do the concept of love is so ethereal it's so out there and the fact that you bring it back to who we are absolutely love that and can you talk a little bit about that because I mean there's a number of different layers to this but I would just say to start off that love lives in the body and fear and defense also lives in our body

so one of the things that got me interested in working with couples in particular is when I was working as a therapist I worked in a very experienced Whole Body Center Way and basically what that means is rather than just encouraging my clients to go off in their story and to give me a lot of data and Reporting what you can do when you're still very disconnected from the direct experience

meaningful things land in our body they they land in our system that's where we feel them and so when I started working with couples it was so rich to have them do these little micro experiments with each other like I'm just thinking about one example I would often do where I would have them lean into each other back to back and this would be an opportunity to see okay is one person taking the position of being really kind of rigid and upright and not able to take in support and only able to receive support in a very limited way and this is the kind of thing that it gets it out of the head and there is no way to deny it but then there's also a lot of opportunity to play with it so we think of it as a laboratory and you go back to that exercise and I would just invite them to me any kind of softened into each other so they weren't they weren't collapsing but they also weren't so rigid if they could really

steel each other and you know it sounds very simple that exercise alone was so poignant and so revealing and I would invite them to continue to try it at home to be kind of how the Continuum with changing and to also get a feel for how they could share this experience of leaning in baby being more the support may be being more the receiver and that's and became like a living metaphor for how they might be in relationship with each other that would say that's that's part A the other thing that I draw from a lot in my work is the more resource we can be in our bodies and what that means is the more grounded and connected and really associated in Indus culture we have a strong bias towards thinking and sauce and we go off in our stories and we just like a band in the body which is where are felt fences or theirs

important information in the body and one of the things about relationship is it can be when we're in a good sync with another person it's incredibly calming and Incredibly nourishing to the nervous system I know for myself that my nervous system is much more regulated as a direct result of being around somebody on a regular basis who has a good impact on that you know it's calling but unfortunately what often happens is when couples get in a cycle where there has been a lot of aggravation and a lot of triggering is instead of having that calming effect they actually just keep triggering each other

so the more I can learn how to self-regulate how to actually notice when I'm getting activated when I'm getting triggered and I don't really have a lot of resources to sometimes just push the pause button come back to my body and come back to being able to feel myself so that I can start to notice and my breathing right am I in fight or flight and that's where the body becomes it's like an essential guide post and it's also the place where we get to experience in all those juicy yummy feelings

so wonderful it really is and I know that you and I were talking about at the top of the show people who have been in multiple relationships you know two three four five marriages whatever that is and that they wanted you to someone different and even is Valentine's and they want to do it different than he did it before and I don't want to give too much are received whatever that is and so I know that you were saying that there is a kind of doctor and all of those relationships and I also know and reading through your materion and knowing people who have worked with you and the profound change that you've created in your life that there is a way to create really like a deep and a permanent and changed that sticks that that's the right way to love you know whatever that is the right way to fill the well and wish that love than close

yeah yeah you know I'll speak to their at the first part of your question first because it was a real watershed moment for me it was really one of those moments is kind of indelibly etched in my mind and also in my body many years ago when I was exiting a relationship that I have to say it has been one of my worst ever you know why I hadn't chosen well and as a result the relationship was very frustrating it was unsatisfying it was challenging and when I exited it from it I kind of set myself down and I recognize that I do not want to experience that again I do not want to make whatever mistakes or be led by whatever was leading me that contributed to me choosing that so I kind of had a very honest assessment with myself and

there's there's two parts that are equally important when we're stepping in and kind of going back out into the relationship world and and one of them is who I want to be know who am I really committed to being and what do I need to address or Explorer discovered inside of myself so that I know I'm not going to turn into a raging lunatic or somebody who Badgers and criticizes or somebody who's really closed off and distant you like what are the things that I've heard from my partners and lovers I have gotten in the way that I want to really address

and at the at the other end of it is who do I want to be choosing that is going to contribute to me being this person you know one of the reasons I really decided to get out that relationship is I didn't like who I had become in Partnership

so I could read the statement that but you know that the person I'm having in my life today my partner it's like I feel like we really bring out the best in each other and week we contribute to each other's growth and development and Discovery I really think of relationship is like this Rich learning laboratory and as long as we're not choosing to fall asleep or blame the other person or reject everything that we do like on to them it can stay a very rich laboratory of of kind of a never-ending Discovery so I'm not sure if I answered your question but we can certainly Circle back to

what do you eat with the original question was absolutely I love that you're sharing if you had to come in the process in that relationship the common denominator is that person in that relationship

you know I was working I was talking with that one of my clients recently and she she's in her in her third marriage so we were you know in this conversation and I mean that is a very common sentiment that I hear where people walk into relationships with a lot of Hope and a lot of anticipation and a lot of sense of conviction this time it's going to be different you know I have found the right person and I'm different and sometimes it is you know sometimes it definitely is but again it's a real moment of Reckoning when they're sharing with me a girlfriend you know we're having the exact same conversation that what I thought I had in my last marriage or know that the one that I swore I wasn't going to do over I feel like that's who I'm becoming again

the good news in that is that we cannot change another person we care I believe have quite a bit of influence on somebody but the only person that we can ever really affect tourism is ourselves until again that can be a very rich peverley moment of what is it who am I being that is contributing to this I mean this women are not going to give away any crocodiles what she was talking about how she notices herself either blowing up a lot and just like blowing off a lot of steam or kind of hiding out and those two are often very connected because if I'm imploding and and and holding everything back and not really being honest about my feelings and my needs and how things are going then it's some point it's all going to Bubble over and it's going to come out anymore

explosive aggressive way a bit and he's discovering how she can start to listen to the signal before it becomes a volcano cuz they're definitely our signals before we're in a ruption and then we get to make the choice about you know what do I want to do with this information how do I want attend to it does it need to be spoken do I have the language to do it in a way that's not going to be damaging or is this an equally important question is is this really something that's just between me and me is there something that I've been carrying around in my own personal

how kind of store house and I really like because I was listening to one of your earlier guessing he was making this point about you know I do this a lot with couples

it's so easy when we have somebody that were very close to 2 just project and blame everything that's not right in a relationship and sometimes even everything that's not right about our life on to them and the moment that we stop doing that and kind of take another level of self responsibility Everything Changes

and just shifting that dial of our attention to how am I contributing to this and what might I shift because even when we go to have conversations about dynamics that are occurring in the relationship when I'm having that conversation from a place of self-responsibility don't you think that's likely to be an entirely different conversation absolutely that's funny because I was my next question to you was that you know when you're talking about making poor choices but I love the wrong it's in the honesty of that and I was going to ask you can Monday

or can we learn to make better choices had a Wii and end so I will put your sharing right now by setting that dial as you're saying is really blind to all of us had no choice has become better because the clarity it's a different perspective

a game-changer for me and it's why I include this process in all of my programs cuz I actually found it really helpful to go as deeply into it as I wanted to go with the support of another person but I think people sometimes and I see that's a lot so she when I'm working with with the single women in there like what should I say in my profile and how do I know what to look for and I have that same confusion myself as like I had this very long laundry list I mean down to just the minutiae of who this person had to be and that can become very very confusing cuz it's like we don't know how to wait every individual thing is the car he drives just his important as his character is the fact that he doesn't want children you know just as important as where he lives and it was exactly confusing for me so I I developed what I called honing my love compass

and this is been so there's there's three deal-breaker three things that if you know or in the equation like for me it was no addictions of any kind you know not to sex not to drugs not to food no addictions and then like what are the three things that you know actually deal breakers for some woman is if he's already had a child and doesn't want to have another child like pay attention to that so you really flush that I didn't get clear about that and then the other side is one of the three things that if they aren't there you know you're going to be pining for or missing or it's going to be hard to reconcile and the beauty of this is that what happens is

first of all that Clarity in ourselves really does become like a magnet I I like to think of it is it tells the universe who to put in our past and who not even bother with because we're like we're wearing a banner that says this is what I'm available for this is what I'm interested in

so that's you know that. That's a really big heart right there and then here's where the rubber hits the road with it because this is this is where it became really helpful for me when I would need somebody who let's say he had one or two things that were really on my desire to lift but there was one big thing that was on my that's not going to work list and before I came to this process I would try and negotiate with myself and be like well okay you know he does smoke on occasion or he does have it whatever it was at the time and when I start making lots of having that negotiation and making those allowances

I felt like I was at a whole other level of clarity about who I chose and it was interesting because from the time that I stopped being with this other man to the time that I met my my partner today there were a couple of other men who I dated and I got to really see huh yeah I can see that ended in the long run this is not going to be a fit and it was much easier to Tangela tangibly point to how I could know that I'm not saying that we know this on the first date I mean I think that's another mistake to make unless there's something that's just in Tire Lee off-putting you know again getting to know somebody is a process

but when one of those things shows up you know like I was working with a woman recently and she was saying I don't want to date outside of forgot to cook it was her zip code for certain radius of miles and then you know this profile that looks great and I said well where does he live and she's like well it's a it's a plane right it's a short plane ride I'm like okay how does this compare with what you've committed to

does that make sense absolutely love this information it's really extraordinary to think about when you open it up and you are so wise and you're so clear and you're so fluid in the way that you share and I know that people are listening to the show right now and they're just wondering and biting at the bit at how they can work on their list and how they find their true love and not stumble again for the third or fourth or fifth time or even stumble before they begin and so do you work on Skype or do you have relationships what is the best way to find you and work with you got a plug there I've got a video series so I have a couple of different programs and I really like working with people at different stages of relationships I have this time

Fast Track program that's called The Love plans and this is for women who really for women who is hard to get back in the dating world if you've stepped out for a while things seem to have changed but also I think I'll finish you know I hear issues about confidence and what do I wear and who I know who I want to be with so I really like holding their hand but really empowering them to make really good choices and sometimes part of that is

you know if there's been a big blow up or a lot of hurt we want a dress. So I've got a program that's really about making sure that either your next step into the dating world or if you're in the dating world and not liking what's happening that we could we can turn that around really quickly and I also love working with women who are you know at different stages of relationship because what I consistently fine and this stiff surprises everybody that I work with but they all testify afterwards is that

it really only does take one and the whole tenor of the relationship can change and often that one eye I have seen over and over and I certainly Francis myself as the woman we have a huge influence and how our Man shows up for us huge huge

so I I find that when a woman just stopped doing maybe a few of the things he's been doing that have been pushing him away shutting him down turning him off and starts doing just a few different things that are going to make him feel loved and appreciated and desired the higher flavor of the relationship changes so that's a longer program that's called the love math and then I have this really sweet day I've been doing a lot of these recently exposed couples like to do like a Valentine's Day gift this is recalled relationship reboots and this is about a half-day It's a Wonderful way for a relationship they can just start to feel a little dry little crusty little like well I know you love each other a word

we want to dust off the cross. You know I will admit I have a personal bias I know it's a legitimate choice to be great so tonic friends with your partner and I don't I don't judge that if that's really what you're both choosing but personally my bias is like why miss out on the juice you know like that is just as part of our connection is a really juicy yummy exciting passionate exchange and that can look a whole lot of different ways but you know when couples I think because I'm just sort of like photonic roommates are platonic friends again it has a very different flavor then when we're feeling alive in our bodies and feeling desire for each other and also you know the nervous system is very affected and very influenced by all the hormones that happen food through sex

so if you want to find out about any or all of that the best way is probably on my site there's a work with me page was it at a job that does a nice job of explaining the different programs and I anybody that I work with I really want to make sure that we are a great fit cuz when we go on this journey together it's a lot of fun it really is it's a very deep but also very kind of life changing Journey so I always want to get on the phone with anybody so I can answer your questions we can meet each other and I offer a complimentary session want to hop on the phone with me there's lots of information about that on the website just go to the work with me page

that's green that's a deeper love better sex.com site correct. Nicole it's kind of a cool story it's kind of cool story so I had a practice for a while that was really geared toward just working with couples

and I was trying to realize and I wanted to expand my work and I really wanted to to steal work with people at different stages of relationship and

I was trying on a couple of different names and one night I went out to I'm a contact improv answer it's on my paper for him to move in and I was getting ready to answer I was like rolling around and stretching and moving my body and deeper love better sex just came to pay it just was like it just came through and I was very strongly guided that that was going to be the name of the new name of my business and I can't really does you know I I have come to see that love really does make sex better and sex really does make love juicier

and what both of us have in common is they require good communication and so when you got those three things going on you got way more than a hammer at your house of love

just fabulous and I got a question for you and you're talking about you're the first program the one that I'm the first signature today but many women will talk about women for second successful in business and not in love that you can become a successful career woman person would ever successful in your life but yet not in love

the call that is such a great question I love you can get us so here's why when we are in our business are often very focused on what we are achieving our next project our to-do list I know I get like overly focused on on my to-do list and I'm often stinking very strategically about my business and my business actually got a lot more fun when I started doing a lot more from my intuition and from my feminine and for my guidance but whether you're in the corporate world or you're the CEO of your own business you are in charge that's part of what goes with being a driven successful limit and it's absolutely nothing wrong with that I don't want it you know the spirit at all but when we take that same hat of being in charge and calling all miss all the shots and we take that into Romance

backfires part of what makes relationship

go really well between a man and a woman in particular is some polarity and some polarity between the masculine and The Feminine so we all have both aspects of ourselves and they're all really beneficial and I'm never suggesting put one down just in exchange for the other but when it's time to be with your man or to go out on a date or to be in a more receptive space we have to be able to shed the skin of I'm in charge everything rests on my shoulders I'm making all the decisions and I like to just offer a little experiment here because I think that this was very telling for me when I developed this and start using it myself like if you're listening and you're a woman and you are running a company or doing something big in the world as I know many of our listeners probably are your body what it feels like during your day are you watching the

Chocolat are you paying attention to check and stuff off of your list and there's a certain energetic that goes with that right and then just imagine taking that same way of being out on a date or meeting up with your man like like what does that body and that energy feel inspired to do okay now imagine yourself just just as a counter maybe you've just gotten out of the bath or you just taking a hot tub or you just done some dancing or some move it and your body feels Lush and locks and you're connected to your body and you're not all up in your head and you're not thinking about checking stuff off

I'm imagining that they each one feels qualitatively different

and in order for a man to be able to really enjoy the feminine which is one of the things that men are the most attracted to and sadly one of the things that tends to really dissipate in in in Long relationships is he wants to feel his masculine and part of the way that that's going to come out the most strongly is when he can feel are having it so I have his practice that I recommend for women and I have actually trained my guy know he comes home and he can see cuz my office looks out the window so he can see if I'm sitting at my computer and if I've got that kind of like you know I've got to get this thing done to that I've given him permission you know you can come in touch me you can rub my shoulders like I really want to transition out of that I'm in business mode 22 I want to connect with you

so the here's my invite when I got my classes you and I'll share it with you is at the end of your day change out of the clothes that you've been in when you had your I'm running the show had on the same clothes

and also any way that we can kind of shake that out of our skin like I work a lot with movement so shaking stretching just moving your hips moving a body in a way that feels kind of more luscious and helps us get more connected to our you know to our feminine and out of the head

but I think putting some conscious awareness to the transition and to also it's like the more fleshed-out that sense of how the different bodies feel the more choice we have about which one is going to be appropriate for whatever activity were were in

that's beautiful that really is I love you dear changing 3 not do you know like in a phone booth and being a superhero that we allow ourselves to step into that come in a roller Thomas like the costuming of the crown makes the queen or something like that just that one little touch absolutely changes it and I left because I was just sharing this and saying here's a suggestion just change or have somebody touch you in a way that all of a sudden brings you back into your body and back into this and I know that you have an ebook and I was so intrigued by this and I love actually for the corporate Mind If I Do A B C D E I can have unbelievable and Bridal section

you got haven't answered me back your eat.

It's like there are there are definitely step in steps and tools are our kind of interchangeable and again it just comes back to like do I want to be limited to just having a hammer and a screwdriver and here's the beauty of it is that

what I discovered is when I start really paying attention to cultivating the the internal resources that we're going to point me toward success in my romantic relationships every single relationship in my life improved the one that's my girlfriend's the ones with my team like I can honestly say that I have almost no drama in you know my son of relationship life and relationships are complicated so you know that's not that's why I attribute that to having some some some tools for that so that did the ebook is really about kind of max out seven essential oils that are going to keep us connected to our own sense of of of need like for one think just just one else is highlight one boundary oak trees are really big issue in relationships and when we know what our boundary is

is when we know what a yes feels like and this is where the body play Such and a key role what he has feels like and where no feels like and I trust myself so I'm not stepping over and capitulating cuz somebody's asking me something when it when I say yes my stomach tightens and I you know I want to like punch you what I'm saying yes cuz I think I have to do just just that alone so I I talk about boundaries and then dicing about the book is it starts with a lot of sesman quiz so this is just between you and you know nobody's going to be looking over your shoulder but this is a chance for you to get really honest and it'll also kind of spark some increase through the questions about you know all of us bring strength to relationship none of us would have made it this far in our life if we if we weren't already bringing some strength and some some resources so I really like to think about we build on was already in place and then we

we also put attention to what are the things that you've picked up along the way there really aren't serving you having the kind of relationship that you want and so eats eats East part of the book first there's a quiz and then there's some content and then there's really practical tangible ways that you can put the step into practice into your life so that it doesn't just a theoretical because if there's one thing we get to experience every single day it's being in relationship with other humans

so I really wrote that book you really wrote the book tour and then I'll get there when I go to a foreign country and I don't know the currency and I don't know the train it's really nice to have a guide and I like to think of the work that I do as you know I've got my headlamp on just a few Paces ahead of you saying you know don't step here or do this or try that and the beauty of it is we all get to make it our own but I wish I had had it I feel like if I had had that guide in sooner I definitely would have made fewer mistakes along the way

it's such a great image it really is and I'm still glad you shared about boundaries because it's funny that that was actually something that I've been working on and who worked on for a long time I didn't know that I didn't know what countries were we do and it's a word we learn home where in 2nd grade or something but I was a section where we had to sit down and write her boundaries and honestly it was a blank sheet of paper I didn't even know what one was to be able to write it down and I and I know it one point in my life I bought two seater car is further a long time because people always ask me to take them to the airport and I could never say no but when I had a two seater car we get to town so sorry but if you were your lunch special

but I do have a great example Nicole yeah and you just pointed filming that such a great example you know how many different places that that shows up and I have to say it is it is an area where there's a lot of confusion and when that when that piece alone starts to come into alignment and Clarity and were able to really give clear congruent yet I mean I would guess that is you started to develop of a clear boundary system did your experience and relationships really starts at 2 to change a car for the first time

yeah it is huge because I mean when I'm saying yes and then sitting with a pile of resentment about it it's like where's the favor and send me who's really benefiting from this and at the same time when I am giving or or or offering from a place of a really joyful like I'm not doing this no should there's no guilt there's no have to but it's just because it feels good in my being to say yes to this you know there's just like there's so much more room for for Joy a possibility and the other place where boundaries are huge is around touch and intimacy and how do I express what I like and what feels good and how do I give myself permission to stay that actually doesn't feel that great and what would feel better is I mean this is this is a lot of time actually in a couple of days devoted to some of this kind of fine-tuning because

I've worked with women in relationships who basically have decided I don't want to have sex anymore because he doesn't know how to touch me and again when we pull in a pulled out back and unpack a little bit it's like how many conversations have you had where you let him know what feels good and what doesn't feel so good

important information leaks I'm so thrilled that you're here to talk to everybody today today today is the day where we wait cast of meetings all my gosh you know what am I going to do to make this day special for the person that I love or are they going to make it special for me or I wish I had a valentine you know and there's another year and another time and another and unloved and unworthy and whatever it is and all those conversations that go on and you know how many different levels of love and of worthiness and responsibilities and infinite possibilities so I absolutely cherish the word for thank you Nicole you even asking really great questions it's been really fun to be in conversation with you and you know that. There's two things I would like to just stay around that this the particulars of the Valentine's Day

and one of them is it it can be painful if you know where we're longing for partner or in a partnership and it's not what we'd hoped for it since it's in the low point but you know this is a real opportunity to kind of face that if you're single and you've been putting all of your attention on your career and you're telling yourself you don't need a man that you don't have time for a relationship or you got a bunch of friends who would invite you to really really be willing to be another layer of honest and that might actually be true for you but there's a lot of women that I worked with where that's kind of a story that they're telling themselves that it turns out that there's still a lot of longing and desire and they just sort of made an excuse or if you're dating and your kind of asking yourself the question like well you know I'm dating I'm putting myself out there but if you're not meeting men that are a match for you or your Beating man that you like and they're not sticking around this is another Opera

Kennedy to just get really honest and what I like to say to people is wherever you are today imagine yourself six months from now imagine yourself a year from now and you're in basically the same place and just be really honest with yourself how does that feel if your wiggling with joy great celebrate that whether your sisters or partner you know it's not up to me to determine what's right for you but if the truth is that you're in something that you think could be better or you haven't dated in a while or you're just kind of waiting for him to show up at your door you know whatever it is it's like this is a great opportunity to just really be honest with what you want with what you've decided as possible and to maybe take a stand and maybe take some action on your own behalf or you know relationship makes it's one of those

execute difference in the quality of our life I mean I'm sure you've experienced that right when something's good it flows over into how we feel about our health in our career and I work with a lot of women who their income start to Skyrocket when they get their relationship stuff worked out so I think it has a call that maybe the rollover affected and there's a better term but

in a relationship to make a difference to us and then the other thing I wanted to say about that is you know of course we're all going to be subjected today to the commercials and to the outside influences and I wanted to see mine yeah call Mark exactly and you know if it's going to really light you up if nobody brought you a box of chocolates go by yourself your favorite candy bar you know treat yourself you don't have to wait for the partner you can go buy yourself a really sweet bouquet of flowers for $5 or $50 and what I always like to remind my clients is that the love that you are eventually going to share with the partner all of that love is already inside you that's where it lives it's in your heart you might end up with somebody who evokes it or helps you connect with it in a bigger or stronger way or helps you feel less afraid to love but that love is in there so today

you can take all of that love whether you're partnered or not and just give it to yourself and it really juicy Big Love shower or your appreciate you like I like to soften suggest that if there's one or two key phrases that you're really wishing a man would say to you say them to yourself and let yourself really take it in as if it were true

a beautiful advice absolutely beautiful advice and I know we only have a couple minutes left but I believe that you have a workshop coming up and I just wanted to put that out there for people that I listening right now I'm just totally know in the calling of the heart that I have to take the next step for 6 months from today they're not in the same place I got right now is anybody out there on the call I promised Nicole that everybody who was on the call today I would make space for you if you want to have a I call in my love makeover sessions I'm happy to do that with you and the e-book is available to everybody just go too deep for love that are sex and you put in your name and your email will send that right out to you and this coming Wednesday I do a monthly call series it's called let's talk about love and each each call is devoted to a different topic

and this coming Wednesday we're going to be talking about how to open your receiving muscle and let the love slide in and this again comes after so many of the things that we've been speaking about but this is one of my favorite topics because I have heard from so many women say something to the effect of you know my partner doesn't do this my partner doesn't see that I'm not getting very sore why won't he and it turns out that so often without her even knowing it she has cut off from receiving and so is that we definitely want to get out of and it's very simple to turn this around and when we start opening I mean I've noticed in the last few years in my life men open doors for me much more than they ever used to Opportunities come to me I need the right people and and having the receiving capacity

if I get it it opens up this infinite possibility so you're all invited to the call just go to deeper love that are sex and on the table that says let's talk about love

you'll find a way you can sign and you do have to register cuz otherwise we can't get you any of the dial-in information but I'd love to have you that the nice thing about these calls is there's content but there's also the opportunity to come on the line and ask me questions which most people don't get unless you're working with me privately so you know if you've if you've been up against some particular challenge in your love life come to the call and we'll talk about it

it's just wonderful. Thank you so much and what a generous offer to be able to do that and if you've been listening out there today or any day that you're downloading this and this happens to fall in your lap and into your heart and you want to hear it over and over again are you can taking notes and there is something you missed and what leave she was sharing about down trees are the steps to love or anything that she has put out there you can listen to this simply by sending a text message to 5 5 6 7 8 2 5 5 6 7 8 studies and the text messages something too cold and you can get a copy of today's show or any of our archives jealous but I know that's always really helpful because I know even myself as I'm interviewing I guess off and I want to go back to miss and over and over at something somebody said and it is to Simply open doors and change my life in this information today is just so beautiful and can make such a difference in your heart and your world and your life and it's just

it's so much fun having you here and I always love to ask my guess is the show is called unlimited like what does unlimited life mean to you living an unlimited life that's a great question well I am somebody who doesn't like limits and I think that you're so an unlimited life means that I'm doing a lot of what I love when I'm passionate about you know for me that sings like dancing and hiking and spending time with friends then cuz my guy eating good food and no just like being able to follow my impulse and to follow the wisdom of my body and then I'm doing as little as possible as possible of things that I don't like to do and that I'm doing from a sense of obligation or pressure and that creates a lot of sense of possibility and a lot of freedom

our pleasure

so thanks for asking you you look really awesome wonderful question stay Nicole Askin such as a light I mean obviously this is one of my favorite topics and passionate about it but it was a really fun to dive in and kind of know what your style into some of the specifics with you because I think if there's one thing that I want your audience to know it's like I know it's easy when we're when people are seeing us as you know I have a great relationship and I'm really happy but trust me it really wasn't always that way and if I can turn it around anybody can turn it around it really is possible there's no reason you have to go without so I'd love to leave you with that intercourse with everybody fabulous Valentine's Day and to really be loving toward yourself today no matter what

Lisa thank you I mean truly magical and the word stunning comes to mind when you look at something and it's absolutely breathtaking and stunning and that's what you're working I mean you absolutely open heart and an entirely different way and change lives and really that happily-ever-after can come true and then limited life and love in your heart and your spirit in your skull I love that you dance I love that you move I love that everything that you teach you put into the body and into the soul as well as into the world and so it's been a complete Joy having you here we look forward to having you back again and I wish you and your beloved and very happy Valentine's Day thank you Nicole I was just saying for you and I wish all of your listener too very very much EC day and thanks for inviting me some great thank you

Lisa Rallis deeper love that are sex.com Unleash Your Love has an unbridled feeling that extra seat at Blair's that passionate pleasure that likes it would she close juicy candy yours it's all inside of you I love the fact that you said all that love is in your heart that's what you're going to share with people that who you are all that live all that wonderment all that magic all that beauty all that gift of you is what you get to share with somebody else and so for all of you who are out there today I wish you and I'm limited life and I'm Bridal life

and Family's the rose and for myself we both wish you a very happy Valentine's Day and they each and every one of your wishes and dreams come true