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Reclaiming Authenticity, March 26, 2021

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Reclaiming Authenticity
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Death Teaches Us A Lesson

Reclaiming Authenticity with Dr James Houck

Death Teaches Us A Lesson

Reclaiming Authenticity

Reclaiming Authenticity with Dr James Houck
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Dr James Houck

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Reclaiming Authenticity: The courage to reclaim that which has always been in you.

No matter who we are, where we were born, and into what family we were placed, ours is a world full of relationships. Indeed, we are social beings who spend our lives making sense of our world by trying to find our place in the world. As social beings, it is often within the context of relationships that we experience tremendous pain and suffering. From overt acts of betrayal and cruelty that someone may have inflicted against us or vice versa, to simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time, many people bear the scars of physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual wounds. And yet ironically, just as we experience our woundedness in relationships, it is also within the context of healthy relationships that we find our healing and authenticity. The difficulty, then, is often finding the courage to discover that which has always been in you.

For over 25 years, Dr. James Houck has been helping people discover their authentic selves by integrating spirituality into their mental and emotional health. As people are able to integrate these disciplines, they often discover core issues that have been keeping them wounded in relationships.

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Show Transcript (automatic text 90% accurate)

and now with over 25 years of experience mental health and spirituality. Dr. James house<br>good afternoon everyone wherever you are in the world at this time welcome to reclaiming authenticity helping you find your courage to reclaim that which has always been in you and I got sincerely believe this in fact I often tell my clients in fact I tell anybody whenever we get on the subject of authenticity and you know I'm Just Having the courage to reclaim everything that is and you know yet to be discovered within ourselves that we come into the world with everything that we need already gifts and Graces and talents and skills personality and so forth we just we don't lack for anything and yet how often do we go through life and not realizing the very best parts of our sales are just waiting to come out and how many times we just settle for those things in our lives that we can see and just like the re-imagined like this is all<br>this is all I can ever be and we we so often limit ourselves we don't realize that moving those things that get in the way just moving them out integrating them healing them allows the very best parts of ourselves our true self to come out and in just live in tremendous tremendous relationships with one another very excited to be with you here today every Friday afternoon at 3 p.m. Eastern Standard Time dude Pacific Standard Time and as you have heard me said the time and time again to each and every week these broadcast focus on the integration of spirituality and our mental health and it's all placed within the context of our relationships the relationship that we have with ourselves and really who is looking back at us every time we look in the mirror relationships that we have with others family members friends<br>workers colleagues and our relationship with God or the Divine or the universe and it is no mystery why I place this integration of spirituality and mental health in the context of relationships because when we think about it we often receive our our deepest physical emotional psychological and even spiritual wounds and relationships come and just think about how you've been hurt think about how you've been let down how you've been disappointed all of these occur within the context of relationships and yet the irony is we can also discover our greatest healing and strength and peace and forgiveness of Love through healthier relationships and just take a second and just be reminded of that healing that you received at the strength and peace and Grace and forgiveness of<br>and the people through whom all those wonderful things came and it always brings us back to relationships and one of the beautiful things about being in relationships with one another is that we have a ripple ripple effect on one another because whenever we transform we also transform others by our presents are Grace in our understanding you know it's those are things not meant to be kept to ourselves but first and foremost you know forgiveness kindness compassion begins with how we treat ourselves as I had once read a nice story and I've seen this in in counseling situations time and time again that the many people just marvel at the amount of growth and change that they that can occur in that the healing that is to them and a colleague<br>time who told me a story that you know he was counseling a woman with severe severe depression and she would always dress in the darkest of colors lot of black lot of gray a dark blue and it just really fit her mood I'm just being deeply deeply depressed and then one week she came in he said that the she was wearing these bright colors orange yellow white red blue bright blue break greens you know just a week after week you know she just started to dress or colorful and just didn't break break up and he said he just couldn't take it anymore he had to ask her this stuff I've noticed that you stopped wearing dark clothes and that you come in here with really bright bright shirts or where or bright dresses and things like that I have to ask what what's going on and she said actually it's from you<br>and of course my colleague was just like what do you mean it's from me and she goes well you you know I just I come in here each week and I listened and we talked and everything but I really noticed how you sit with me on the kindness that you you know you display and just your presents with me and how you were very compassionate and very understanding and listening and so forth and not judging and I started to sit that way with myself after the sessions you know for the rest of the week and so forth and it started to make all the difference in the world and it started to lift her mood she started to be more compassionate with herself she started to look for ways to you know seek healing and so forth she started to find ways that she could be more loving of herself and more forgiving of herself and when she was able to do that<br>hurt their oppressive symptoms lessened and lessened and Lassen and she found she said that she got any started to dress more and bright colors but as she was more compassionate with herself she started to become more compassionate with others and when she started to be more loving with toward or towards herself that she started to show more love to others and so forth and I got is just a beautiful story my colleague has shared with me I've never forgotten that then it always reminds me just a simple but powerful teaching that transformation often begins first and foremost with us but it doesn't stay with us is meant to be shared it is meant to be giving away so that transformation can continue and I also love that quote from Henry now and who says just by paying attention to what is going on around us<br>I want to discover that there are people who heal each other's wounds there are people who forgive one another's offenses and share their possessions and Foster the spirit of community and celebrate the gifts that they have and there are people who live in constant anticipation of the fool manifestation of God's glory<br> on dr. James hauke and if you would like more information about me or to know a little bit more about me or to leave me your comments about Today Show just invite you to visit the website it's www. DDS radio.com reclaiming authenticity that's www. DDS radio.com backslash reclaiming authenticity and in case you're not able to spend the whole hour with me that's fine you can have these broadcasts or podcast it in case you want to go back and listen again or you can go back into the archives and listen to previous shows Once you had messed and so forth so if you would like to call in and be part of Today show I can also invite you to call the toll-free line at eight eight eight<br> 6276008 that's 888-627-6008 and give me your insights and comments and thoughts today on on the subject where death teaches us a lesson and it would be focusing on the caca poop on a shot death teaches us a lesson well as I said for those of you who might be tuning in for the very first time is that I'm just a firm believer that we all come into the world with just the wonderful gifts and Graces that we have been given and again bees are not meant to be hoarded these are meant to be shown these are meant to be giving away these are meant to help one another and yet we often go through some unpleasant experiences or we find ourselves in the wrong place at the wrong time and out of that those wounding experiences we may feel we need the high<br> those skills those gifted nests are we we push those talents lay down so that others cannot see it as perhaps we were using our gifts and talents and I'm somebody took advantage of it or we felt like they were taking advantage of it and exploited that and had hurt our feelings or whatever the case may be or let's say perhaps you've grown up in a family or your place of work or business that you heard the criticisms you do on a daily basis that we just telling you that there's nothing special to you or that you can be easily replaced or whatever and then how that is often very wounding to us emotionally psychologically spiritually and so forth okay but as a result of these experiences we don't intend to go through life from this place of of winded a place of victimhood and we might convince ourselves well what<br> one for me you know after all this is all I can ever be or whatever excuse that we've swallowed but we've never really taken the time to heal<br> Henry come from this place of woundedness in our relationships and as the old saying goes that wounded people wound people<br> hurt people hurt people and often are committing the same patterns of wounded same patterns of hurt all over again because never been given an opportunity to heal but when we are able to heal from these wounds and others or we move away from this pic we definitely come into each and every relationships from a place of healing and wholeness and we not only embrace our a chance house our uniqueness but we also embrace the hutch at the house or uniqueness in others so I'm right here we go with the car.<br> I'll let me you got to start off with a question as I have known to do just to get everybody on board here so what was or what is the most valuable lesson you have ever learned in life what was or what is the most valuable lesson you have ever learned in life or for that matter what was the most valuable lesson you ever learned about life<br> okay what was it<br> okay to have it that usually we can count on one hand the number of valuable lessons we learned okay but a little bit deeper who taught you that lesson<br> did it come from a book<br> maybe did it come from a person<br> maybe your grandparents might be an uncle or an aunt maybe if parents maybe a colleague maybe a friend who taught you that lesson for these lessons and perhaps most importantly when did that Knowledge from these lessons turn into wisdom<br> when does that knowledge turn into wisdom to wear your life totally changed and kick me on a total transformation occurred<br> and when did this knowledge that turned into wisdom and totally changed your life when did this wisdom move you into a deeper place of being everyday teachable<br> when did they move you to being in a place of just teachability where you now look at life with just the sense of wonder and honor and Grace and you are so open to looking for the lesson that is there well it's no secret that life lessons often come back around to us time and time again until we either finally get the message or we learned that you know what we needed to learn about ourselves and this is something that's just not yet really characteristic down through history and so forth but certainly you have characteristics for life you know what this is just simply how God of the universe works that if we have yet to understand the lesson or to learn from the lesson don't worry it will come around again and it will keep coming until we you know finally stopped pay attention open ourselves up to it put re go to the back burner and learn<br> what it is we need to learn well it looked at it this way but I feel that nothing teaches us more about life and living and death<br> nothing teaches us more about life and living than death one of my favorite books is said Arthur and I just love the story it's it's just a phenomenal because you know we could just see ourselves in the story and as if we are just walking along with the Siddhartha Gautama he had everything that it seemed impossible to happen have in life but despite all his influence and and beauty and you know what is this FedEx and everything around in his early twenties so are so you know Sid Arthur start to be you know become discontented he just started to become Restless he's just know it's going to be more than this and yet his father you know just tried to provide his son with everything to spare him from being exposed to<br> let's say the ugliness of the world okay I'm so when Sid Arthur just said I'm going to leave the palace and I know his father heard this and like waiting by the way but let me make some preparations before you go outside the gate and not just in terms of protection but he wanted to provide let's see the Aesthetics out there for Sid Arthur there to just keep on seeing the beauty and keep on seeing the riches in the glory and so on and so forth but yeah said Arthur just said okay today is today and I'd like to said the king had already ordered you know any person with a disability or or anything that would be disturbing to Syd Arthur to be hidden away from his View<br> but as The Story Goes Monday said Arthur when he was out from the palace he saw an old man and the old man was bent over and he was kind of trembling little shaky on his feet and Syd Arthur eventually became aware of old age<br> another time that Arthur went outside the palace saw a sick man suffering from disease and then illness and still another time you know so d'arthur witness the funeral procession procession and a corpse and finally on another Journey outside his Palace home he met a monk who had this in her trunk Tranquility this glow despite living a life of anesthetic and this tranquillity suggested to sit Arthur that this monk had finally come to terms with the things that Sid Arthur saw earlier such as old age and sickness and death<br> and Syd Arthur wanted to know more about this and his father the king however called for more festivities to entertain his son but some around his 29th birthday Siddharth are just renounce his Regal life for you he left his sleeping family and he said out finally once and for all with this server and this decision was not easy for him you know but making this Choice he took it upon himself to find out about the origin of suffering as well as how to overcome it and he did this for his own understanding of course but then he also did it for all the people<br> well what is it about our awareness of the aging process or illness and sickness and diseases and death that teaches us about the need to realign our priorities and strive for this inner tranquility<br> you know what you think about it once we realize that were mortal that one day our hearts going to stop beating in our breath expires and our brain waves will cease and everything we see is temporal<br> but yet what we do not see is eternal<br> and there are many scriptures out there that teach about death and dying that we are much more than that we are much more than our physical selves and then as a result how then should we be living<br> in the scripture is just cause you know the kind of turned us back Inward and just say okay because you are aware of these things in others and yourself what kind of life should you be striving for what kind of priorities need to be redirected so forth what kind of healing and Grace aren't to be shown in everyday relationships and we have the Bible we have the Torah I have the Quran we have the bug of Akita we have the guru granth sahib and and so forth he said many many scriptures all have this theme of the more we know about our mortality that don't bite more we know about death and dying the more it teaches us how we ought to be living<br> well for today I just wanted to focus on the copter upon a shot and don't know if you've ever read it it's just one of several part of the other part of shots and as a whole the pain of shots are the ancient scriptures which form the final part of The Vedas and number more than 100 and they contain both verse and prose and they vary in length but they were believed to be written somewhere around 8 300 BCE in Sanskrit and the upanishads are philosophical scriptures which are also known as the vedanta meeting the end of The Vedas and research on the just a name upon a shot and it just as fascinating but I found first of all the name<br> he is coming from the skin Sanskrit term which means a narration or referring to a tale a fable / Parable a story<br> and the name will punish Assad is derived from the Sanskrit words Opa meaning near me getting down and sod so when you put those words together it means to sit down near or to be close to a teacher or Guru to learn an important teaching again this suggests our openness in our teachability<br> well the loop on a shot then describe say a spiritual journey of a young boy who is way way way committed to self knowledge that is after stripping away all of the worldly trappings and and he really wants to discover the nature of who he is and he's just not content for any kind of Pat answer or don't worry about a kid is just you know you don't need to know this he's like no I die really need to know this and so as The Story Goes not your captain is the boy's name and he convinced his father to allow him to visit Jama with the word of God of death in the story and so it would not cat has entered the house of death Yama was nowhere to be found and and as a result not to get there was not showing the hospitality as any house guests<br> and this oversight was considered a huge disgrace I mean it was just like a major slap in the face just just huge this was big dragon as the elbow part of shots and I write I want a spiritual guess enters the house like a bright flame she must be well-received you must be received with water to wash his feet far from Wise or those who are not hospitable to such a guest as a result they will lose all their hopes their religious Merit they have acquired their sons and their cattle so as a result when Yama returned and he discover that hospitality is not shown to his guests he was extremely embarrassed and he granted not to cut the three Boons or three wishes as we would call them<br> and don't you cut their goes through the first two wishes were the first two Boons and okay, after some discussion says okay I will grant but it was the third wish the third boom that really troubled Yama this god of death and not you kept those Third Wish was about understanding what happens to the soul after death<br> are you really wanted to know do you know who am I and Yama after hearing such a boon he of the he tried to avoid fulfilling it instead of answering the question he asked not to cut the tub that's for something else while you okay but not to cut the was firm in his desire to know this truth and he didn't give up but<br> yo yo, tried to persuade him you know he just said okay look not skepta asked for Sons asked for grandsons who will live a hundred years ask for herds of cattle that's for Elephants horses gold vassal and I still live a long life as you desire or if you can think of anything more than anything more desirable ask for that that's for wealth of a long life as well ask. You cut the to be the ruler of a great Kingdom and I will give these things to you and I will also give you the utmost capacity to enjoy the pleasures of life ask for beautiful women of loveliness rarely seen on Earth ask for these lovely women riding a chariot skilled in music to attend on you<br> but not your captor please don't ask me about the secret of death<br> but a Sceptre he was an Awakening Soul he knew about all the the Treasures of the world are temporary<br> if he knew was that a wise person will always choose the Eternal good but a foolish person will chase after those Earthly things that never satisfy the Cry of the Soul<br> and I have to tell you I have attended many funerals in my life and officiated that you know several and people are buried with some strange things and it's kind of a Western World Twist on Egyptian Book of the Dead where your people would want to be buried with the safe fishing tackle if they were a fisherman or one woman wanted to be buried with her sewing kit because I doubt she'd love to quilt she loved to make dresses and so forth that's who she was and so on and so forth they're just people want to be buried with things that were most precious to them okay almost to say I'm going to need this in my next life or or whatever the case might be but one of the things that I have never seen and the years that I have been officiating at funerals or even attending funerals and the procession to the grave site is I've never ever<br> ever seen a hearse pulling a U-Haul behind it<br> I've never seen that<br> and so you know that that old phrase of why you can't take it with you that's true but how many times throughout our lives are we so tempted to live our lives as if we're going to be able to take it with us then we let the the very good powerful eternity things and a slide by the wayside things that make a difference in a person's life the things we can't put a price tag on for some reason one reason or another we just kind of neglect that we don't understand it or we just so you know that can wait have as if we have all the time in the world but we just we realize you know very abruptly that wolf we don't have all the time in the world<br> and so this style of this conversation. Not to shut that has with Yama is just a powerful conversation and I really appreciate how much kept I was just undetermined you know when and how Yama tried to persuade him look like don't don't don't ask about the you know what happens to the soul after death don't don't tap don't ask about the Eternal stuff because I can give you anything you want here on Earth but not to catch up you know Wise Beyond his years just realize that now you really have nothing that you can tempt me with and as a result it's interesting but in not skepta the fear of death was gone<br> there was nothing that that you know your mother could do to instill a gripping fear of death into him you know not that we're going to be spared from the aging process or sickness or weird or dying<br> but by knowing these things we are then compelled to live our lives and quality of relationships that uplift others to discover these things in themselves this often reminds me this story reminds me of the time when Jesus was wandering in the wilderness gospel that was mentioned in what is a time when Satan tried to tempt Jesus with worldly pleasures in Pursuits and how that conversation went and you don't intend pretty much you know Satan said okay Jesus I'll give you wealth I will give you lavish food I'll give you unlimited power but each time Jesus said no and if his responses I pretty much Jesus said to Satan you know what the things you think you have first of all you have nothing to tempt me with<br> and that fear of those losing those temporary things we're just not there that fear was gone you know because once mentioned not to cut. I realize these things are death no longer had power over him or over anyone yours whereas whereas St Paul said elsewhere and his when his Epistles where oh death is your stat where are death is your Victory it's been swallowed up you know once we know how the live once we know what happens to the Soul at that once we realize that we are eternal<br> that fear isn't there and going through you know an illness or sickness we have a different perspective you know even facing death you facing arm or immortality even going through the aging process<br> yeah we we aren't we just do not fear that because we are immortal<br> so all in all the cup that I will punish odd is about overcoming death by understanding it and learning from it and immortality just cannot be reached without understanding mortality<br> so in other words like death is here to teach us lessons to let us know that we cannot take our lives for granted we cannot become overly attached to things and once we get that lesson<br> that beer just dissipates so our purpose dead is to understand our existence and see how we may use these opportunities to to broaden I'm not just our knowledge but to also establish a base for our freedom from Death itself and from The Cut the Rope on a shot we also learn the story that that you can't bargain with death you know you can only make peace with it you can you do with with your character or you know just being totally focused and spirituality and dutifulness and knowledge of Purity and so forth and how many times does society want us to remember you know how a person has died when all in all<br> what is transformative for us is when we remember how a person lived the lives that they touched and how they loved others<br> well I would really love speaking of love I would love to hear your heart on these matters so again if you would like to call in this number is 888-627-6008 and I'll be taking your calls after the break again you are listening to reclaiming authenticity and I am your host dr. James house and I'll be back with you in 1 minute<br> okay welcome back I'm dr. James how can you been listening to reclaiming authenticity and I just before we go on with our subject today the cop Opana shot I just want to say a word about next week's show. It's entitled letting go of clinging to problems letting go of clinging to problems and you don't often times many people just can't imagine something better for themselves or that they are onion of that they are worthy of being loved or valued and I and so we're going to take a look of thought I would take a look at just what is it that we are clinging to when we cling to our problems and and what is this gripping fear that we have but you know just by focusing let's say on the four noble truths of Buddhism and other scripture it is just going to be a powerful lesson of once we let go of those problems we can take on something that is so much better for<br> so you're more healthier that's redundant I guess it is more healthier so but anyway letting go of clinging to problems so advise you to tell your dad next Friday April 2nd yes we are going to be in April for letting go of clinging the problems so keep in mind that how we think so we are well earlier the show I was talking about the Capital Pawn ashadha a teaching from the perspective of a dialogue between a young man not to Captain and Yama the god of death and right before the break I just don't share that the cop Opana shot is about overcoming death by understanding it and learning from it okay and then once we learned from Death it just really really lines are priorities you know on the Moor way we know of the you do that<br> yeah we are mortal okay we can embrace our immortality we know we realize we are souls and so death is here to teach us a lesson you know to let us know that we cannot take our lives for granted and that we cannot become overly attached to things yeah that's the key I'm not I'm not saying that we shouldn't have nice things but in the grand scheme of things do those nice things have us<br> guidance of our purpose that is to understand our existence and see how we may use you know our opportunities just to broaden our our knowledge and just establish a basis for our freedom from Death itself well if you've ever read the copy Opana shot it's just an interesting dialogue between a young man and the god of death or Jama and often reminds me of other conversations that show up in Hindu scripture and the one I'm thinking about is the bug of agita and this is if you've read that or you for you've heard about it it's a story between you know another dialogue between Arjuna and Krishna in all takes place on a battlefield and again Arjuna is just like I don't know what to do I don't know what to do Krishna tell me what to do<br> and it just launches into this wonderful dialogue that again just pulls us right into the story and just read a couple of excerpts from this week you'll get the idea of it and this is krishna's speaking he says oh Arjuna do not care about opposites like Pleasure and Pain just work do not care how your work turned out but do your work well this is being wise and being wise takes you to God<br> then be wise you won't be confused because your mind will concentrate on God and then Arjuna s o Krishna recognized as a wise man whose mind is concentrating steadily on God how does the wise man speak and how does the wise man sit and walk<br> Oregon answered a wise man is he who is always satisfied because he wants nothing<br> he is happy by himself inside of himself within his soul<br> and because he was always satisfied the wise man either feels joyful when he gets something good nor does he feel sad when he gets something bad he has no hatred or he has no Envy he's not afraid he's not angry and he always stays calm a wise man is he who controls his mind and his senses this means he tries to separate himself from outside objects even though this is very difficult yet a wise man always controls his mind and concentrates on me and by thinking of objects a person starts to want them and a person who always wants things cannot have them all but then she gets disappointed perhaps her disappointment makes her angry her anger confuses her and she loses her concentration her mind and she is ruined and she has no peace<br> but a person who who stops wanting things as free from attachment she is free from loving things and free from hate and such a person is on the path that leads the peace and so on and so on these wonderful dialogues that show up in the scripture that again just pull us into the story because they speak directly to the heart of humanity and calls us to really discover who we are as well as what do we go after in this life what is it that we pursue a beautiful meditation in a comes our way to help us remind us or reminds us of the need to realize who we truly are just this comes from the capital punishment itself he says it's the hidden self in everyone does not shine forth he's only reveal to those who keep their mind one pointed on the Lord of love and thus the<br> a superconscious manner of knowing and meditation enables them to go deeper and deeper into Consciousness from the world of words to the world of thoughts then beyond thoughts to the wisdom in the South so get up wake up seek the guidance of an aluminum teacher and realize the self sharp like a Razor's Edge sages say is the path difficult to Traverse and if you've ever seen the movie The Razor's Edge I think I saw the version that starred Bill Murray I forget exactly when what year that movie came out but the razor's Edge want to say Tyrone power's might have started added like an earlier version but it is so true and it just follows this analogy of you know we we pursue things that we think<br> are going to give us happiness and satisfaction like that they can touch the very core of our souls but I can't you do the worldly things just simply cannot measure up to the depth of what our soul is crying out for it is just impossible so if you listen to the advertisements out there or the way products are marketed you were distant you realized very quickly that sorry it just doesn't you know what unit is not going to fulfil the promise that it puts out there it just simply cannot I do like I said earlier in the show its it just it's not that you know how many nice things if that's not the issue I mean we all need food clothing shelter yo and things like that you know we rely on our of our vehicles we rely on you know certain foods that we like of course come on let's admit that we get spoiled right okay but it's when there was nice things start to have us.<br> we will kill for it or we'll step on a person or step over person to get those things that's where it becomes a major major problem that's where we need to go back to the source you know when just take a long hard look at death in the face and just realized that okay what is the lesson that I'm failing to understand at this time because when we fully understand that that we two are going to age we too are going to get an illness or sickness or of the body's just going to eventually wear out we too are going to die<br> don't come to that point in our lives to say have I loved another person to the best of my ability<br> have I helped them in some way have I blessed them in some way or have I you know just striven all of my life to get what's mine or what I think is mine and I didn't care who I hurt or how many people have to suffer as a result but we can truly say even if I helped one person in this life<br> you know just the difference but that made to that one person because again we never know what that transformation is going to do for them and in them through that I am I on Research with this I've done just quite a bit of research in the area of near-death experiences and the people that I have talked to of had near-death experiences have experienced such a transition such a transformation themselves you know they they often talked about doing a complete hundred and eighty degree turn from how they used to be go in the priorities they used to have and the jobs that they used to go to and then just how they treated others and all that stuff it just they did a hundred and eighty degree turn from the former way of their life you know all because they have experienced shall we say the other side<br> and dr. Kenneth regular co-founder of the International Association for near death studies he pointed out that there are very distinct specific lessons that the rest of humanity can learn from people who've had near-death experiences these are very very valuable lessons that you know that right now to go and then to have a near-death experience is now that that is that is to be strongly strongly discouraged but for people who have either died on an operating table or died in a car accident or whatever this be the case their hearts have stopped and they've had a near-death experience where they felt like they've been taken into heaven or taken to a place of of just utter Tranquility you know other peace and surrounded by just the the warmest glow and feeling of unconditional love and I<br> conditional forgiveness yeah those people come back because they're either told not now or you're not ready for whatever<br> m a r resuscitated they come back and they are forever changed you just you can just tell by looking at their eyes but there are specific things blessings that they have learned and we are wise for those who have not had near-death experiences we would be wise to pay attention and to integrate the lessons into our lives for example and say that they have learned that there's a reason for everything that happens and we may not know you all on This Side of Heaven but there's a reason for everything that happens<br> and to find your own purpose in life<br> you know find out what that is now don't be a slave the time is another lesson that they're fond of saying and appreciate things for what they are not for what they can give you your just appreciate things for the sake of appreciating that okay and don't allow yourself to be dominated by the thoughts or experiences of others is how often many times were pulled in One Direction or another in our emotions are all over the place because somebody said something to us or somebody had done something and it's just how we can often get caught up in the life of another and we stop living our own lives and right on the heels of that people have had near-death experiences often say you know don't be concerned with what others think of you<br> cuz in the end it's not going to matter and one of my favorite is remember you are not the body and then you know do not live in fear cuz not even pain and you know you do not fear death and be open to life and live it to its fullness<br> they also say that the money and material things are not particularly important in the grand scheme of things because helping others is what counts in life<br> and people have had near-death experiences the the competitive side of them know. Just it just it no longer exist so they they say you know don't trouble yourself with competition just enjoy life<br> and they also say that when we die we realize that we are not alone nor have we ever been alone well as I said with my research in this area my own studies I've come to understand that people with near-death experiences are you know. Only you have been radically changed and their everyday life but they also grab at 8 to religions and spirituality in new and radical ways you know they often seek out new pads or direction of their own spirituality but they also believe they've formed a collaborative relationship with God and in that they are aware of the connection that they have with God in everyday circumstances or everyday decisions in situations like they don't have to question is god with me they know God is with them<br> and you do near-death experiences have this incredible desire or need to help others you know that they're no longer content with just merely giving chili side lip service but it's like if you really want to make up the difference in somebody else's life you do something you just don't talk about it and the people who've had near-death experiences are are more forgiving you know often realizing how much emotional or psychological and spiritual bonding occurs as a result of bitterness or holding grudges and they just say let that go<br> let that go are they often talk about feeling and seeing the weight of the wounding in people but they just been wounded at some point in their life and it just they've been weighed down they've been carrying something for so long and it's it's just so heavy because it's turned into bitterness or turned into a grudge or something<br> so what about the rest of humanity who has not had a near-death experience what we do and we really want to learn from people who had this radical transformation in in these types of experience we can read books okay there's there's hundreds of books out there that been written about first-hand accounts of people who've had near-death experience and that these are bad you know it's always nice to hear the stories but these are also excellent for educating yourself nor fully but you know if you truly want to learn integrate the lessons of you know what death is teaching we need to take a closer look at our lives and we just have to ask ourselves okay where do these lessons challenge me<br> what's holding me back from living my fullest potential<br> you know what what concerns do I have what do you know what are some things that I am just so persistent in in terms of the negativity in my life but there is persistence that we are supposed to have you left for assistance in finding the truth just like Notch cut that a persistence in well okay you know the worldly things that the goods and other things that we go after the things that we going to go to work for we have the money so we can buy okay okay but do those things really have me<br> can I let those things go<br> what do I feel like I have to hang on to them and then maybe fight to keep those things but that persistence that not your kid that had with you, and just let you know look. You you can tempt me with nothing and and so knowing that he was eternal knowing that he is the Universoul he does realize that the lessons that life was teaching them you know he just to remain steadfast remain consistent and persistent eventually you know we will find our way as if it says one of my favorite quotes in The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho he writes when you really want something and I like that you really really want something all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it<br> and I like that cuz it reminds us that we're not alone and if you consider the desires of our hearts and what God has placed on our hearts or the universe is placed on her heart<br> those things aren't just there by accident and so the whole universe God will help us achieve we just have to be open we just have to be teachable and so dreams and desires are very much a part of life you know we all may not have clear and precise goals but you know everybody in some vague idea about the future or where they want to go or what they want to do or make themselves happier prosperous or how they went to help children or their family to succeed in their lives and in the end a few reach their goals but but even in death you know not to remain firm in his resolution and kept looking for the information he thought was necessary for his own Liberation shall we say and the welfare of other spiritual spider it's like him<br> well as I wrap up this broadcast I just want to leave you with a favorite story of mine that just brings in the whole message of the Capital Pawn a shot as well as other scriptures that clearly clearly clearly teach us that the most beautiful things are often unseen the Eternal things are unseen and what we see are very temporary it is a story of The Diamond by Anthony De Mello and he writes that so now she had reached the outskirts of the village and settle down under a tree for the night but a villager came running up to him and said the stone to Stone give me that precious stone well well what's go after sunny I see well last night the Lord appeared to me in a dream said the Villager and told me that if I went to the outskirts of the village I should find a sanyasi who would give me a<br> I just know that would make me Rich Forever well the thing is I rummaged around in his bag and pulled out of stone he said well I probably met this one and he handed the stone over to the Villager and I found it in the forest along the path some days ago but you can certainly have it with a man gazed at the stone and wonder if it was a diamond probably the largest diamond in the whole world there was as large as this person's head and he took the diamond and he ran away and he gets that I'm rich and but I'll know he passed in his bed unable to sleep the next day at the crack of dawn he woke up and here and find thus the a c and he said sir I'm going to return this diamond to you because I want you to give me the wealth that makes it possible for you to give this diamond away so easily<br> and there and he started his own journey of looking within and the things that are most precious in this life dr. James how can you have been listening to reclaiming authenticity I have enjoyed spending this time with you and like I said if you like to leave me your comments about Today Show just invite you to visit the website but until Dad till next week everybody please be safe behave yourself and may you always walk in God's peace take care<br> comments to buy a book by it's all there just to calm and we'll see you next Friday at noon Pacific on CBS Radio TV<br>