Crazy Sexy Midlife Love, December 9, 2020
Show Headline
Crazy Sexy Midlife Love
Show Sub Headline
What makes a good man? Karate Kid, Cobrai Kai, dating and mating
Crazy Sexy Midlife Love with Morgana Rae-Galaudet and Devin Galaudet
What makes a good man? Karate Kid, Cobrai Kai, dating and mating…
We’ll see where that takes us. And Devin will be pulling Tarot cards again.
Archive Category
Crazy Sexy Midlife Love
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Talk Show
Show Host
My husband and I are 25 weddings deep into getting married 100 times in 100 countries. 100% his idea. And honestly, when we hit 100 we’ll probably keep going, cause we’ve been in honeymoon mode for 5 years now. (He’s a smart man.) We met at 45. Started getting married at 47… back in 2014.
My philosophy is love gets better and more fun at midlife, especially for women. We’re smarter. Men are more relationship ready. (And if they’re not, it’s so obvious! Next!) I want to punch holes in all that negative, fear-feeding nonsense I grew up hearing about age and love for women.
Getting Married around the World
The reason for this is simple. Love and travel are two of our favorite things. By combining the two we unite the best of our worlds. Yes, at least, 100 weddings!
100 Weddings, So Far
Yes, we are aware that we are just getting started.
1. Los Angeles, CA USA — May 23, 2014
2. Puerto Vallarta, Mexico — June 5, 2014
3. Dubrovnik, Croatia — September 14, 2014
4. Kotor, Montenegro — September 15, 2014
5. Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina — September 18, 2014
6. The mountains above Sarajevo, Republic of Srpska — September 22, 2014
7. Belgrade, Serbia — September 26, 2014
8. Belgrade, Serbia — September 26, 2014
9. Bled, Slovenia — September 29, 2014
10. San Marino, San Marino — October 4, 2014
11. Rome, Italy — October 5, 2014
12. Vatican City — October 5, 2014
13. Gesi, Turkey — February 12, 2015
14. Norwalk, CA — May 27, 2015
15. Villa Del Palmar, Loreto, Mexico — June 17, 2015
16. Wizards Academy, Austin, TX — October 6, 2015
17. Sri Rahti, Penestanan, Bali, Indonesia — May 8, 2016
18. Toronto, Canada — August 10, 2016
19. San Miguel de Allende, Guanajuato, Mexico — June 15, 2017
20. Colima, Mexico — November 18, 2017
21. Sedona, Arizona — November 10, 2018
22. Paris, France — September 26, 2019
23. Brussels, Belgium — September 29, 2019
24. Madrid, Spain — October 11, 2019
25. Lisbon, Portugal — October 17, 2019
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Show Transcript (automatic text 90% accurate)
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Devin and Morgana have been celebrating midlife love by getting married 100 times in 100 countries.
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They believe grown up love gets better and for fun, especially for women. Everyone smarter wiser man or more relationship ready
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And if they're not, it's obvious forget anything. You were told about being too old or too late for loving adventure.
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Instead, get fresh new tips on dating relating and travel to exotic destinations and best of all call in for personal guidance grading Crazy Sexy midlife love in your life.
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Morgana Rae: So fess up. Don't you sort of feel like the king, when you see that video and all these weddings that you put into motion?
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Devin: Like a king. I'm not even sure what that means. What I will say is that I think you did a good job on that video right
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Morgana Rae: Well, thank you, thank you. You came from a background with Miramax editing films. So you were a bit critical of my first try, but I took your notes.
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Devin: So, but now we're live. And we're talking
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Morgana Rae: Hello. Welcome to Crazy Sexy midlife love we are your co hosts married couple Morgana and Devin married 25 times now working towards 100 and then we will probably keep going. That was Devin's idea.
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Devin: That's true, because I like to travel. Yeah. And I like my wife to. Oh, right. So there we go. We're starting. Yeah, we're gonna have a show.
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Morgana Rae: Well, I kept going on these trips to these beautiful places around the world to speak and do business stuff or just travel and it was so lonely.
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Morgana Rae: To be in Ireland or Scandinavia, or Bali by myself single in these locations that are screaming romance and I just kept telling the universe, year after year that I wanted to travel the world with the love of my life. And now we do
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Morgana Rae: Devinn actually approached me online under the moniker Travel Guy, which was kind of a clue that he liked to travel.
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Morgana Rae: Because nothing gets by me. h
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Devin: She gets the subtle nuances. You're all over it, right? That's your middle name.
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Morgana Rae: Today couple things. The show is just Devin and myself today. We have gotten into the practice of pulling tarot cards because now we're doing the show on video and also audio. It's a nice little visual thing. We have a camera, why not do something visual?
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Morgana Rae: I'm a fourth generation tarot reader, but my husband is really the expert because he's has studied way many more nuances than I have.
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Devin and Morgana: Well, the Western mysteries. Yes, well with Kabbalah astrology. Numerology and all that stuff and a little bit tongue in cheek in all of it. Yeah. Well, that's what makes you so we have tarot cards.
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Devin: Which my wife pulled, yes, pulled already. Did we discuss that?
Morgana: Now, are we going to talk more about the show, we're gonna get back, get back to the well the big, the big overarching topic of today's show.
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Morgana Rae: Is what makes a good man. We are finally going to talk about something really important that we never discussed on this show before: the movie Karate Kid and the follow up TV series Cobra Kai
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Devin: You have a certain vintage okay for this show right if you're a certain vintage and you have not seen Karate Kid. I think it's just, just a cultural must
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Devin: Because then all these weird sayings like sweep the leg all the sudden start making sense laughs, all of that kind of stuff.
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Devin: And it does. It's like one of those shows like there's not a lot of movies that you can think of that had all these quotable things. I mean, the Wizard of Oz was amazingly quotable
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Devin: And this was another movie that was just like, there's a whole slew of little things throughout. It was like, all right, you know that that kind of really informs our culture and somehow
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Morgana Rae: I made it through the last 40 years. Or I guess since it was set in 89, it was filmed in 1984. Oh my. So I made it through the almost last 40 years without seeing it until two nights ago and
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Dears: She was in tears. Yeah, well of course in tears because it's great classic.
Morgana: But I have to say I love Cobra Kai more because theyre so much more interesting as adults there so you know the the the Johnny Lawrence, the bad guy.
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Devin: Never spoilers. There might be there are human beings out there who don't know what to say.
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Morgana Rae: They are just so much more
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Morgana Rae: complex and interesting and relatable to me now as as a middle aged person watching them as middle aged people in Cobra Kai is I think they're adorable. So
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Morgana Rae: Yay. Thank you for introducing into that and of course the central question of the movie when they're boys and now the movie now that they're middle aged men is what makes what makes a good man. I think that's that is
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Morgana Rae: The essence of their battle and their, their you know karate philosophies is it's really a debate between
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Morgana Rae: different definitions of manhood that we see like at the root of almost all of our big political and scientific and social issues today is, again, this question of what defines a good man.
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Devin: I have different opinions. What made a tentative list that I wrote down and 10 minutes Entire lives now in my pocket. Okay. Has happened before. That's true may happen again. Okay, may not even be in my pocket right now that will have nothing to discuss for the next video just have to make it up on the fly, never. No problem. That's what I did with the list again.
So we have. So I do. I have a list. I have like seven do's and one don't. Okay, so go to that. Right. And also we have a phone line to call in
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Morgana Rae: With your ideas and opinions on what makes a good man, um, because I think we see actually a little bit of it. And both of the extremities of
Morgana Rae: Of Karate Kid and and Cobra Kai. So the phone number, if you want to call in is 888-627-6008 to express your opinion or ask a question.
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Morgana Rae: And I will try to remember to repeat the question, as we go along. But first we're going to dive into the tarot cards because I brought up the tarot cards. So I want you to just at this moment. Think of a question.
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Morgana Rae: For example, what do you need to know.
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Morgana Rae: To complete 2020
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Morgana Rae: And leave it behind and create a beautiful
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Morgana Rae: That's that is like an example of a question. Maybe you have something more specific to you, Devon, do you have an idea for a question. Well, no. I mean, the question I have. Typically when I teach a question I always have is, what do I need to learn about this week. What do I need to learn
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Morgana Rae: And I tend to throw it out as three cards set sort of the first card read is what is happening now. What is the historical
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Morgana Rae: You know thing that is accompanying this is present moment. And what is the future.
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Morgana Rae: Hold. And when we talk about the future. We're like, you know, since we're talking in the week and we're already on Wednesday, really, like, what's the thing I'm going to be kind of looking forward to over the next few days.
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Morgana Rae: And more importantly, I tend to look at the taro the whole taro thing as like a psychological
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Morgana Rae: Development of humanity. Right. In other words, I think these cards are really about sort of like the philosophical, you know, what's part of the human condition that we walk through
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Morgana Rae: And so these are 78 representations of that those cards have sort of all kind of color each other when place next to each other. So it's not really to me. It's not like
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Morgana Rae: You're going to get you know $400 on Thursday. Congratulations. I would love to be able to tell that to everybody.
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Morgana Rae: Unless of course you need like 1000 but you get what I'm saying, like they did the over the overarching principle is that this is kind of like
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Morgana Rae: We all have these abilities to view our experiences in ways that will ultimately be beneficial but frequently circumstances and situations surrounding us and sometimes the way we're feeling and thinking can cloud that so we use the cards to kind of like
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Morgana Rae: Uncover the stuff so we can get, you know, we can get through the difficult times, and hopefully rejoice in our victories about that for philosophical beautiful I like a
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Morgana Rae: Little bit of a bigger timeframes on the next few days. And since we are you know approaching the end of the year. I'm really deep into thinking about what are the lessons of 2020 like what are
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Morgana Rae: In such a difficult year. What are the winds. What are the blessings. What are the learnings. What are the seeds for something beautiful in the future that I can extract from this year.
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Morgana Rae: So that I am unencumbered and looking forward to next year. So I'd really love to kind of make that transition around now.
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Morgana Rae: And going deeper over the month so I'm kind of looking at, I like to look at more from a bigger picture a month or the turning of the year.
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Morgana Rae: And I lay them down a little bit differently. I, my first card is past second card is present third card is future just chronological so if you want to ever like play with cards at home. I think the most important thing is
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Morgana Rae: That you make it up. I mean, there are lots of clues, lots of books, lots of research that add like the more you know, the more meaningful. It is
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Morgana Rae: But at the end of the day it's your interpretation and it's your energy and it's your relationship with the cards. Would you agree, sure. I was just
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Morgana Rae: Really
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Morgana Rae: Just. Okay. Well, yeah. Go ahead. Go. So, so, and, and also, you know, you can
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Morgana Rae: Again. Our phone number is 8886 to 76008 so I'm going to pull the cards and you may have some feelings or ideas or aha moments about it. So, for the past the card I pulled for the past, drumroll please
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Morgana Rae: Is what numbers that eight of swords. So for those of you at home who do not see the card and haven't memorized.
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Morgana Rae: All the cards. This is a really dramatic looking card where you've got a very, very unhappy woman in a
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Morgana Rae: red dress bound and blindfolded one foot like in that cold, damp puddle with a castle on a mountain in the background and the eight swords.
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Morgana Rae: On either side of her three on one side five on the other. So she's feeling really really trapped and not very happy and I can't imagine why anybody would look at
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Morgana Rae: As feeling trapped by painful swords.
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Morgana Rae: What I like about the card is there actually is an opening. She just can't see it, she could leave the circle of swords, but she's but she is tied up
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Morgana Rae: Tied up looking in mobile looking unhappy with the blindfold over her face and puddles on the ground. So, Devon, what would you have to say about the card.
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Morgana Rae: So what I would say about the card is. I think that's probably the most important feature is is that there is in fact way outside and even though, sort of like where she standing right now.
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Morgana Rae: It's not in a while. It's kind of sort of desolate and muddy in her right immediate moment and she is surrounded by swords that yes if she took off her blindfold and she took off her bounds her binding, she would notice that there was, in fact, the way out swords tend to go with
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Morgana Rae: airy mentality types of things. So, you know, I would say that a lot of the binding in the bondage comes from perhaps mental obsession sort of where you kind of think yourself into a bad place. But really, you know, home is sort of like right behind you, way out.
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Morgana Rae: Is when mere fact that they're even appears to be a way through on the card so she can get out of there.
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Morgana Rae: The red tends to be about power that you know in her dress. So she's probably having a sense of powerless Ness that's going on. But she's probably not as powerless, as she may feel
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Morgana Rae: In this moment or mentally. She may feel trapped in a way
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Morgana Rae: So I, I would say that, you know, even though it's very bleak looking card that there's only sort of a way out of that thing, but it's one of those. I think this is probably a pretty good analogy of what 2020 looked like.
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Morgana Rae: Cuz it's a drag. I mean, between the news. I was just talking with a friend today like don't watch the news.
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Morgana Rae: It's just, I mean, my wife's could completely go crazy. Well, no, I don't watch the news. I know, but there's so much in terms of news. There's so many things to just kind of go up.
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Morgana Rae: Again, more what now that it's just like, this is the stuff that kind of traps you so between the pandemic between sort of like politics between sort of like our day to day news.
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Morgana Rae: You know, between all that's been going on. Certainly, social and people, etc, etc. This is one of those these moments that we can kind of hopefully look beyond sort of what we feel we are encompassed in. There's also a Hebrew letter that means fence. So when I see this card. The Hebrew letter.
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Morgana Rae: Is sort of valued at
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Morgana Rae: The number of eight. It does mean fence within itself. So when I see this particular card. I tend to see that number.
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Morgana Rae: Fence and Hebrew or that spelled out equals the numerical value for a team for those who care about such obscure things for a team connects to this idea of opera or which is sort of like an on high magical word
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Morgana Rae: Meaning, sort of like you invocation. Just think of it as that as like a really powerful good force.
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Morgana Rae: But sometimes to get at that thing. We have our, you know, the things that sort of blind us and the things that bind us and the things that keep us from being that sort of like highest evolution. Yeah. And I, and I want to say that
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Morgana Rae: Even though there is a way out and she will get out and she's miserable. She really is tied up so she is
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Morgana Rae: Kind of lost. She can't see she can't just take off the blinders because her you know arms and hands are tied up. So there is
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Morgana Rae: Like a sense of temporary restriction. But it's, you know, a real experience of restriction definitely obstacles definitely kind of miserable.
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Morgana Rae: So I don't want to negate that with just Spiritual Bypassing but at the same time. What I love that Devon said is, there's also this sense of like magic.
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Morgana Rae: Is also at work. So it's kind of like, you know, one of those of chemical experiences of of
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Morgana Rae: Compression
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Morgana Rae: And trial, through which is like born what wants to be born. So, this can be a really powerful thing and Devon mentioned the red dress and I know he Devin says that red represents power. So, so maybe
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Morgana Rae: Maybe you are more powerful than you experience yourself to be because your circumstances are very, very compelling and challenging. So that is the past.
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Morgana Rae: I bypassed.
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Morgana Rae: Now we come to the present, and regardless of what your circumstances look like this is what the cards say about the present, which is a really happy bountiful card. So those of you at home.
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Morgana Rae: I'm holding up the 10 of cups and you see these 10 chalices, in a rainbow.
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Morgana Rae: Above a happy married couple and happy dancing children and beautiful verdant land. And I think a house in the background and a river. So there's flow and there's abundance and there's love and happiness. And it's like a wish fulfillment of
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Morgana Rae: Love and abundance and home life. So there is something going on somewhere right now.
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Morgana Rae: That is really, really good going on. And so this is a good moment to maybe scan.
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Morgana Rae: What is going on in your life for your life experience that feels like this rainbow wish fulfilled of love and happiness and home because that's
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Morgana Rae: That's where the card says we are right now in relation to
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Morgana Rae: The question you asked whether it looks like that or not, Devon. What would you say about the 10 of cups. What would I say about the 10 of cups I would say all but in other words this is
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Morgana Rae: In general, is Salvatore a card things just happened in a really positive way. The kids are dancing. As you can see the arms stretched out.
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Morgana Rae: By the couple that are arm and are witnessing this incredible thing above them. So it's a lot of good things.
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Morgana Rae: I would also say that release. If you talk to a traditional capitalists frequently a rainbow seen as an omen.
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Morgana Rae: Of things not being so great because the idea of much of capitalism capitalist philosophy is dealing with this notion of the light right and this light.
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Morgana Rae: Is is great as the light the rainbow is a diffraction of the light. In other words, that's where the light comes from where it's now separated into other things. So, meaning
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Morgana Rae: You know, I would say yes. Congratulations. It's a good time. Enjoy yourself. You know, like everything else. In other words, like in this previous card. Yes. Everybody's you know we're bound up. It's terrible. It's a drag. It's not permanent. So the same kind of idea here would be
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Morgana Rae: Enjoy the abundance run with it, celebrate. Have a great time and recognize that this is not a permanent thing. So don't rely on you know for forever now being trapped in this notion of abundance, where there's rainbows and and you know cups and
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Morgana Rae: I'm thinking of Noah's Flood.
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Morgana Rae: And when God said, You know what, maybe that was overkill. And I shouldn't do that again. So I'm going to make a covenant with you that maybe killing off humankind is not such a great idea and and and destroy God sent the rainbow. And since we're coming you know through
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Morgana Rae: A major plague pandemic. I think maybe a rainbow is a good sign that there is another side. I think the news of the vaccines coming through.
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Morgana Rae: So maybe there is a cause for celebration. That's what I would project on to it, you know, given my perspective on the situation.
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Morgana Rae: Looking at Devon for confirmation. Oh, it's fine. Like, by the way, the way I tend to teach these things. It's like these are just ideas right there. They're I think they're ideas that we explore. I think we
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Morgana Rae: We start we look at them, how they can be useful to us. Is there something to be learned from it.
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Morgana Rae: You know, I mean, the truth of the matter is, if you're like if you were like pandemics been fantastic for me.
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Morgana Rae: Then great then then have it be fantastic for you if all of a sudden, at this very moment where we're kind of saying it's rainbows and wonderful and you are having an opposite experience. That's okay.
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Morgana Rae: Absolutely. Then we then we just be conscious of these these this plethora of things that could be happy and you know there's so much if you know the pandemic may have been fantastic for your business and somebody close to you died right now that's that's just, it's been, you know,
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Morgana Rae: A tragic year and yeah like I've
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Morgana Rae: Had a really just abundant lead loving life this year. So we all get to have lots of different aspect is the mixed bag and we get to see how it makes sense for us. And now,
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Morgana Rae: The future is
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Morgana Rae: The priestess card number two and this is Major Arcana which means it's a more important card than the other two. So I kind of dig that it showed up in the future. Now,
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Morgana Rae: For me, what I see in this, I tend to personalize that and identify with the high priests identify directly with the High Priestess because I'm intuitive and I professionally have kind of a role of being a facilitator and a guide.
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Morgana Rae: But I'm bringing out this card for everybody. So, what I see is you have a Woman with a hat that looks sort of like a moon with the full moon and a crescent and
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Morgana Rae: The you also have she's in front of a backdrop with a bunch of pomegranates, which is fertility and it's sort of like PR Stephanie, the goddess of the underworld is represented by pomegranate, so she's got a crescent moon at her foot and, I think, is that a cat. It's hard to tell with my
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Morgana Rae: No, no, that's just interesting wrinkles in her on kind of cloud like waterfall of waves of the dress porn or per BLUE WHITE DRESS pouring over
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Morgana Rae: her knee. She's in blue and white, which is purity and reminiscent of of the images of Mother Mary in church iconography. She even has a cross, which can be a Christian cross or a Holy Cross.
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Morgana Rae: On her chest. So there's a connection to the divine all about her. There's a lot of just goddess intuition.
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Morgana Rae: Imagery around her kind of between worlds veils especially with the pomegranates, and that connection to the goddess of the underworld and then she's between two columns one
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Morgana Rae: Has a be on it. One has a Jay Devon will have to tell us what that means, but one is black and one is white. So there's a real there's a real notion of duality.
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Morgana Rae: And balance of like not favoring dark or light, but in between in between worlds, so
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Morgana Rae: Lots of ways we can interpret that for the future, um, balance, I would really love to see divine connection.
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Morgana Rae: But I think balances, a really big piece of what we need.
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Morgana Rae: Moving forward in the world. So, okay. So, Devon, you take over. What do you see, okay. So, you know, these two pillars are of Joaquin and Boaz, which are sort of the two pillars that
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Morgana Rae: Before sort of like the ancient rabbi would walk between these two pillars in order to go into the Holy of holiness, to say the Divine Name of God. So it's sort of like, it's not just merely like oh here's these things.
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Morgana Rae: They're actually really quite important. And I think if you were to look in sort of like to the Masons and and ceremonial lists and things like that. These two pillars are really actually quite important. So
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Morgana Rae: They do represent sort of like opposites and there is sort of a sense of balance of this union of these two opposite forces working together. Yes. The, the High Priestess is she's sort of like the path that connects two of the two of the top
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Morgana Rae: Ideas on a tree of life and so she's like a really. She's like a major player. Yes, there's some elements fertility is not in the same way that the Empress card would represent them but
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Morgana Rae: Important not sexual. But still fruitful. Right, right. Like a well potentially capable of a fruitfulness
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Morgana Rae: Might be a better way to say it. In other words, she certainly she's not pregnant at this stage, like in some versions of the empress, she would be
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Morgana Rae: But yeah, I think this is sort of like a gateway type of card and the gateway, we're talking about is sort of like way high up on on the on the thing, right, the gateway into sort of like the spiritual high mindedness of the South, maybe even above that.
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Morgana Rae: So I think, in other words, where I would put this as sort of like the marriage between
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Morgana Rae: Sorry, I'm going to use the language of the tree of life for a moment, which is hope. Ma and Bina, and those are sort of like the top two spheres or
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Morgana Rae: Two of the three top two spheres on the tree and and basically you can look at being as sort of like the creative force the divine creative energy in the universe.
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Morgana Rae: And and hope my sort of like the all potential of that universe where so they're so they're like these two things that haven't necessarily manifested, but they have all of this incredible force behind them to do really sort of
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Morgana Rae: Anything that they want. And so the High Priestess is that person who's standing in between these things.
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Morgana Rae: Again, when you go into the Holy of holy. That's where you're saying that divine name of God.
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Morgana Rae: And it was not just like anybody could go in there and it's not like anybody could just do it at any point, it was like there was this one day YEAR. THIS ONE TIME OF YEAR. THIS ONE PERSON a year, who had this ability to go do that.
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Morgana Rae: We're going back into deep biblical history on this stuff. But that idea of the pillars is sort of remained, you know, today, Devon, love of my loins, you keep shaking the camera when you did. Sorry.
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Morgana Rae: I was behind me. Okay. Well, yeah. So I think it's kind of like one of those threshold cars where there's lots of
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Morgana Rae: Positive force, but you also have to remember that it's quite possible that somebody can take that creative force and do something great with well knowing what we know, at least in the United States. I would, I would say that this is on like the larger scale.
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Morgana Rae: We could, that there is more polarity in the future. It's not going to disappear in 2021. So I think that the guidance is to walk the middle path and discern what is true because there there is extremity.
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Morgana Rae: Going on at but she's at peace in the center of it all and
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Morgana Rae: Any, any other tricks. Well, it's really the card isn't about the extremities, the cards about the High Priestess who standing between these two yeah opposing forces right and but keep in mind, even in the context
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Morgana Rae: Those are put opposing forces sort of represent kind of like this pathway that you can walk so yes balance, I think is important.
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Morgana Rae: But I also think it's kind of for me anyway. The way I tend to look at it as like a threshold card.
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Morgana Rae: And you can. There's a lot of positive energy when you get to use that energy. However, you, you may. Yeah, so even between these extremes, there is beauty and there's fruit.
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Morgana Rae: And there's and it's all potential like this tiny crescent moon is the potential of the full moon and these pomegranates are potential
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Morgana Rae: Now that I've interrupted you. Did you want to interrupt me back. No, no, this is, this is how our relationship works. Yes. I stay quiet.
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Morgana Rae: This I'm spoken to you know that's not at all true not. It's an illusion. I can present yes why body and everybody can think, my god, what a noble long suffering, man. Oh, it's dreadful
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Morgana Rae: Read
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Morgana Rae: Read My heart is what you did, I know. Please, please, go on. Oh, so. Okay, so where were we so we thought we were talking about Karate Kid and Cobra Kai right
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Morgana Rae: Why do you love those movies. Well, okay. So, I mean, certainly there is just sort of like the the good versus evil sort of thing, right, we've got this little twig of a kid who's new in town, who's getting roughed up by
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Morgana Rae: You know cares about me, but in the story in the story, we have this sort of adorable guy right who is
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Morgana Rae: In trouble and he's got no dad and he finds Mr. Miyagi. I mean there's just so many different elements of this thing. In other words, there's kind of is mild
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Morgana Rae: You know idea of standing up for yourself. It's sort of about fighting for whatever your truth is I think there is
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Morgana Rae: This sense of like how do we handle disagreements and challenges. And then of course you have on the opposite side, right, you've got the bonsai trees on one side and then on the other side you have sort of like clearly combat you know, Super Deluxe Vietnam, you know, mercenary character.
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Morgana Rae: Who you know represents this other this other Dojo, this other sort of philosophy which is like strike first strike hard no mercy. Well, it reminds me of
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Morgana Rae: The idea of chivalry introduced in the Knights of the Round Table, where before that the value was might is right and that's Cobra Kai might is right and it's very black and white.
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Morgana Rae: And there is a real fear and and and that comes up more in the series that if that if you have mercy or debt. And then on the other extreme. The Miyagi Dojo, the Miyagi School of karate.
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Morgana Rae: Is that the purpose of manhood and the study is in defense of goodness and to protect others, which is the the Knights of the Round Table sort of creed, not to be a bully, but to be a hero.
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Morgana Rae: But both sides of them see themselves as heroes and that that's what I love about the series because in the movie, the bad guys are just the bad guys.
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Morgana Rae: Bad guys and you don't you don't you don't see their wounds or their humanity or their, their struggles, or they're striving to and the reasons that they they made the choices and and chose the teacher that they did. And so they're far more lovable in the series.
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Morgana Rae: Oh, and by the way, Devon pointed out to me that one of the I'm going to, I'm going to mention that it does appear to me that
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Morgana Rae: One of the episodes was written for a specific actor who was sick and I and I'm just thinking, wow, the people who made that series.
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Morgana Rae: What, what good people, they are because I know a lot of actors and that may have been
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Morgana Rae: That episode may have been necessary for that guy to get his health insurance that year. Um, so it really, really just seems like the people who make that show are good people.
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Morgana Rae: Like I don't I don't know who you are. I didn't pay attention of the credits, but I'm really, really loving the show, it's, it's a fun show. I don't want to give spoilers at all. That's my job, that is that is my wife's job. She's very capable of that.
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Morgana Rae: But yeah, it's a fun show but so I guess what we're all leading to in this conversation is we're talking about these ideas of
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Morgana Rae: Bow time just slides by what does it mean to be a good man. And so, so I have a lot of thoughts and of course we're going to, we're going to share our time talking about these thoughts and so I wrote down. First off, when I started writing these down.
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Morgana Rae: And I did not take a lot of time. So this is not certainly far. It's not my definitive list. It's not a definitive list, but it's like the idea of going into it as I do with most of the things that I do is that
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Morgana Rae: You can do these things, or you can focus on these kinds of ideas without having money or a job or
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Morgana Rae: You know, whatever, like the money property and prestige. You don't need to have a particular career to be a good man. It's like, so there's a story. It's not a story, it's
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Morgana Rae: But that's interesting that you say that because
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Morgana Rae: A lot of people in our culture will say, you have to have a good job or you have to have a lot of money and provide for your family and and you have and you have to, I was
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Morgana Rae: gonna answer that right now. Okay, so, so there is there is a musician named Victor. Whoo, and he is probably one of the best bass players best musicians alive is an incredible player.
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Morgana Rae: But he's also kind of a philosophical smoothies Lucky's input person.
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Morgana Rae: So one of the things that he was talking about because he, as you might imagine, he gets up and performs constantly and he was, you know, the quest. The main question he gets asked by everybody.
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Morgana Rae: Is how do I be a great musician, like you and his responses. We don't need more great musicians. We already have a good Jillian of them really what we need are good people. And so, of course, how do you get there. So I was going to start with.
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Morgana Rae: Sort of like
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Morgana Rae: My, my list that is I've written down. So if I have to refer to it. I totally will
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Morgana Rae: And if you want to call in with your opinion on what makes a good man or number is 8886 to 76008 you have your list. Yes, I put it back in my pocket. I'm gonna, I'm going to talk about the first piece.
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Morgana Rae: Okay. So going back to really talk about more honest question, which is, but don't you need a good job. And don't you need all these things. Well, you know, sort of,
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Morgana Rae: But I don't think you need to necessarily have those things in order to be a good man. Now, that doesn't mean that there are people surrounding
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Morgana Rae: A good person that say, well, okay, you might be a good person may be, but really, you need a job and you need all these other things.
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Morgana Rae: That society sort of deems that you need. And maybe you need them because, well, people like to eat and people like to be, you know, in shelter, rather than out on the street or something like that.
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Morgana Rae: So yes, we need those things. But if you don't have those things. That doesn't mean you can't be a good person. That doesn't mean you can't
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Morgana Rae: Be a meaningful person, you don't. I mean, like, I think one of the things that we do.
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Morgana Rae: We do is we look at money as a scorecard. And so it's like, oh, if you have a lot of money, then you're doing really well on the scorecard. When you talk about ideas of goodness it's a much more nebulous thing so
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Morgana Rae: In making my little list. I think that for me. The takeaway is really about what can I do, even if I don't have
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Morgana Rae: Anything, what can I maintain in order to at least kind of sort of what I believe. Part of the goodness is sort of like developing good
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Morgana Rae: Self esteem and good consciousness about yourself. Right. So even when things are terrible. And because we're all going to go through setbacks.
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Morgana Rae: That when those setbacks occur we have, we can rely upon our character to move us through the next parts of life.
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Morgana Rae: So with all that said, I hope that made some kind of sense. So with all that said, I think probably
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Morgana Rae: The first time I listed may not be the most important, but it was the first thing that I wrote down and that is integrity.
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Morgana Rae: And so the integrity thing brings up a whole slew because I've had this conversation, many times where people have
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Morgana Rae: Lots of feelings about what integrity is supposed to me, kind of like goodness. Right. Well, but I have a lot of money. So I'm good right integrity is one of those things, I think, like the way I see it is sort of like its thing that's kind of sits in the middle of your chest.
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Morgana Rae: And the integrity is where sort of like I know more or less what's right or wrong, or what's acceptable or not acceptable for me.
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Morgana Rae: Right. So when I go outside of those lines. I tend to not feel good about myself, because really this is the area that I need to focus on and
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Morgana Rae: It's going to be different for everybody. Everybody's going to have different set of priorities. Like, I think you can. I think if somebody can desire to be a billionaire and just have
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Morgana Rae: You know truckloads of cash falling. The sky at all times and stay there still can be within their own integrity. The trick is, is that I can
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Morgana Rae: Not feel that I'm with integrity, but pretend that I am
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Morgana Rae: And that's kind of the gray area. I think we can have this sort of like sense of self and self, self sense of self understanding of what's
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Morgana Rae: Right wrong for me and then blur those lines, even though that I may not be to the right or wrong thing. So when I say
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Morgana Rae: Have integrity, really what it's mean is, it's more about connecting with your like who are you
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Morgana Rae: Connecting with that part, but don't even criminals have their own code of ethics that allows them to feel in integrity, even when they do horrible things well. Okay, so if you were to talk about and I think I just realized my shirts on backwards. If
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Morgana Rae: If, like, okay, so my father would have been sort of like the honor among thieves type of guy. Right. So there's your talk. Oh, that's that's integrity right honor among thieves. So it's sort of yes and sort of, no. It depends. It depends. In other words,
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Morgana Rae: Your integrity doesn't require other thieves to validate the integrity, your behavior gets to. In other words, you
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Morgana Rae: behaving in ways that actually feed you in a positive way that integrity is all that's really needed. Remember, this is one component of multiple pieces that like, I believe, in my humble opinion, allow us to kind of
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Morgana Rae: Be a good person walking out in the world. So if we are surrounding ourselves with themes that will sort of like help massages, because one of the joys of being a human being is that we get these two roads.
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Morgana Rae: And one of the roads is filled with broccoli steamed broccoli with no topping or sauce or anything that even solved because we don't want hypertension and on the other side.
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Morgana Rae: Is Snickers bars and so the drawing of the Snickers bar.
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Morgana Rae: Is far greater than the idea of steamed broccoli and nothing else. That sounds dreadful unless you knew my vegan friends. Well, I'm not listening. This isn't a moral distinction. What I'm saying is
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Morgana Rae: More often than not, most of us have these two choices to make. Well, I'm going to go this easy pastor. I'm going to go the delicious path or I'm going to go to this other one because it feels right, or whatever. Right.
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Morgana Rae: And then there's this other path and that other path. I would say has nothing to do with honor among thieves. I think it has to do with sort of like really honoring who it is that you are and who it is that you're meant to be.
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Morgana Rae: And that's a much trickier thing than just saying, oh, I want to get along with the people. Right. Because if you're getting enough sort of like
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Morgana Rae: Enough people applauding you for eating all the Snickers bars. It may feel good while you're eating the Snickers bars and people applauding you going down the path.
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Morgana Rae: But they those people applauding. You may not be around if all you ate was Snickers bars eventually
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Morgana Rae: Many health risks will happen, right. That's not a to me a big debate, but I think if you go down that path where it's just like what everybody's telling me to go down the path.
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Morgana Rae: I would say that may be in line. It's conceivable, it could be in line with integrity, your personal integrity. But I also think it's very easy to be led astray.
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Morgana Rae: Because people are applauding you along that path. Well, when I
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Morgana Rae: Integrity is one of my highest values. And when I think of the word integrity. I think of the word into integer, like in math, the integers are the numbers that you can that can only be multiplied by
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Morgana Rae: Itself in one like there can only be one, seven and there can only be 111, then you can't really break it up. It's like a solid wholeness. A oneness and so I when I think of integrity. I think of like
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Morgana Rae: Everything is aligned and and one and true. So you don't have bits of you fighting against each other.
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Morgana Rae: Does that make sense to you. I'm, I'm, I'm with you. I'm with you enough. Okay.
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Morgana Rae: So let me let me. That's why we're married right so so what I was going to say is that
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Morgana Rae: So I, I, because I've been in recovery for years. That's not a big secret. It's not an important thing. During that process. I've known loads of gang members and people who've been in prison and lots of people that are like
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Morgana Rae: piecing them together that alive. Right. Some have been who've been doing it for many years. Some of them are new to it, and all that other stuff very seldom and I mean I've known some
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Morgana Rae: Rough characters all of those rough characters are actually at their core they you know they were products of environment. They were products of lack of opportunity. They were products of
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Morgana Rae: The wrong group of people applauding them down the wrong path because, well, but this seems to be the path I should be going down. So they so what ends up happening is
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Morgana Rae: The more you go down that path of the Snickers bars and I say that with love. I love me some Snickers bars. Like, if I could, I would just eat Snickers bars breakfast, lunch and dinner. So if I'm going down the path of the Snickers bars.
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Morgana Rae: At some point, I start losing complete sight of the other path at all like I can hear from standing at the why, I can say okay I can have sort of Snickers bars, but maybe I should
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Morgana Rae: Kind of temper that with some steamed broccoli, too, because that would be good. So if you joined a karate Dojo, where all the values were bullying and no mercy, and that was what was rewarded and confirmed around you every day. Right.
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Morgana Rae: And and we we see this an adult worlds in the polarity and division in our country today where old they are the bad guy. They are the bad guy and our circles reaffirm that
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Morgana Rae: Right. And so, so what I'm saying is, is that's about community. And I would argue, because I. Another thing that I talked about. We're not going to get to it at all today and let's try to get into one more of your points before we
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Morgana Rae: Have some other things to say, Don't worry, we'll get to other points we have time. Okay. We have time. So I forgot what I was going to say now because your graduation.
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Morgana Rae: Congratulate so okay so wait. So we have these we have these two points. And if you start going down the one path and you start losing sight that they're in fact is broccoli and if there's another way to go.
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Morgana Rae: It's very easy to lose sight completely. One of the things that I've heard from people who spent
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Morgana Rae: You know, time in prison and times really getting into areas of life that are, you know, really challenging. In other words, it makes life far worse and more difficult.
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Morgana Rae: Is that they've strayed so far they ended up they say this a lot. They ended up doing things. They never believe that they could possibly do. Right. Because what ends up happening is, once you start ignoring this thing.
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Morgana Rae: Right, this sort of like set part of who it is that you are all of a sudden, you can start making rationalizations to carry you further and further away from yourself.
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Morgana Rae: And then, of course, once you're out in the woods where it's just snickers land and there's nothing else to choose from.
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Morgana Rae: But varying degrees of Snickers. It's hard to ever get back to a place to find sort of like appropriate fuel that will help you
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Morgana Rae: get you where you want to go and better way. So how would that relate to a guy who's dating and wants to be a good man. Well I you know samore well, like for example I've dated guys who were kind of
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Morgana Rae: Well, we have rape culture guys who are aggressive guys who push
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Morgana Rae: Guys who lash out guys who are who lie and cheat on you and are just difficult to be around. And there's so many women. I know we're just want to like
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Morgana Rae: Write off all men in general because they've been hurt even though like thank God there are still, you know, a world of good guys out there.
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Morgana Rae: But so how do good guys end up out of integrity in the dating world month and I'm asking this as a woman as a fiber still out dating because right i was that woman for 45 years
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Morgana Rae: How does she find a good man. Right. Okay. So you're putting the cart way before the horse, and that's what I did. I know you
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Morgana Rae: So, but, so let's talk about that for a moment. Yeah. So I think part of the problem is is that
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Morgana Rae: It's this belief system that we're all one thing or another thing like I've kind of narrowed it down to, you know, steamed broccoli and Snickers bars, just to kind of illustrate a point
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Morgana Rae: But let's say if we were on scale. I'm an individual and you could rate me on a scale of one to 10 and let's say I'm a
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Morgana Rae: 6.5 great right above average wonderful or 3.5, it doesn't really matter. So you write me that. So how does that. Where does that number come from. Is it just because I'm
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Morgana Rae: 6.5 in all areas of my life across the board know it's what it means is I'm good at one thing I'm not so good. Like for me, like I play a bunch of instruments.
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Morgana Rae: I'm a better guitar player than I am a piano player, but if you judge me by only me playing piano that I'm kind of a dud.
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Morgana Rae: Right, I'm probably a better bass player than I am a guitar player and I'm a worse mandolin player that of banjo. Banjo player, but my point is, is that we're all in different areas of our life at any given point in time, right, we could start out at a 10
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Morgana Rae: By 10 over here, but then five crummy things happen. And then my outlook on life becomes like a two.
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Morgana Rae: Right, so it's constantly moving and changing. And I think we get into this idea of goodness that everybody else is going to like me and I don't think you can use as use that. So if women are upset.
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Morgana Rae: At who they're dating. I think part of the processes is that women have to kind of look at themselves and go okay well what am I doing in order to a attract this kind of person.
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Morgana Rae: Right. They could that, you know, and be they have to look at, well, what is it, what are they, judging.
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Morgana Rae: Now, if we're talking about. Okay. So you're talking about rape culture is all concept that goes way beyond. How do you become a good person rather than how do you create a good society.
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Morgana Rae: Right rape culture talks about a much bigger picture. So when we're talking about being a good person. I can't fix society. What I can do is I can go out and be a good person. Right. I can look at the components.
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Morgana Rae: That will allow me to start being the best person I can be. And when I start being the best person I can be
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Morgana Rae: I will start developing what I believe to be as positive self esteem and self image which means I get to go out into the world with a measure of confidence.
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Morgana Rae: If things don't go my way. That doesn't mean I'm going to throw myself off a cliff. What it means is I'm going to a strengthened skills that need to be improving without taking it.
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Morgana Rae: Personal right so if let's say I go out into the world and it doesn't go my way. I'm not going to go take it out on the next person I meet because I may be feeling somewhat inadequate in a particular moment.
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Morgana Rae: Does that make sense so i would i would argue to kind of talk directly to your question is, is that I think Water seeks its own level to some degree.
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Morgana Rae: Like, I believe that there's a certain harmony in the universe. And so that harmony is sort of like I think part of the reason why we need to be in relationships.
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Morgana Rae: Whether it be romantic or otherwise, is that I think we need to see a reflection of ourselves, to some degree, I would also say that
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Morgana Rae: If you're attractive you attract everything. So just because you attract a dud or someone who isn't nice to you is not a reflection that you're not good enough.
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Morgana Rae: It when you're attractive you attract everything. And what is a mirror of your relationship with yourself as who you choose to keep
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Morgana Rae: So if you go on 31st dates and 25 of them are crap will improve your screening. A improve your screening
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Morgana Rae: But if you your only job is to extract yourself from the bad date safely and not see them again and you've succeeded. So
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Morgana Rae: We as human beings attract everything because the universe just wants to see what we want, or what we choose. And then we get to make the decision about what belongs. What level we experience ourselves at in our choices of what is in alignment at that moment. And what we choose
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Morgana Rae: So there. So right off the bat, the differences between men and women have been demonstrated it is very exact moment.
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Morgana Rae: Like, for sure. It's actually sort of amazing and it's but i mean i think that's okay like again. This kind of goes back to what can you, what can, can you control.
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Morgana Rae: And at some point, I can go march on Washington, I can go fight for what I believe in. And that's, like, great. Go, go do that. But I think most of the power that you have in terms of change has to do with your own self.
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Morgana Rae: Right and your own measure of consciousness about what it is that you can do, and maybe part of that consciousness is realizing that you have the ability to go fight the power on on the steps of Washington, go do that right
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Morgana Rae: But I think some of the easier changes is becoming about dealing with yourself. Right. In other words,
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Morgana Rae: What, for me, is was a really important lesson is that my personal responsibility and doing things that I knew was right in the sort of core thing.
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Morgana Rae: Had more value than my attempts to fix everybody else around me to have them do what I thought was right and so that's to me what this kind of, you know, this is point one I've other points, but we'll never get to the, like, what was that other thing.
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Morgana Rae: I got to like point one a last your last my list. But we abandon the topic, but we'll get back to these topics, because I think they're really important. We do have a guest next week, Rhonda Britain.
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Morgana Rae: Britain. Yeah, Rhonda Britain who I've known since like 1996. So like most of her coaching life she won a ton of Emmys, as the first star of an on TV coaching.
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Morgana Rae: series called starting, I think, was called starting over, which she not only started but wrote and produced and and and I just love her. I love her to bits. She wrote the book fearless living she's created a whole coaching school around fearless living. So I think, you know,
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Morgana Rae: I just, I, I said to her, when I asked her to be on the show. I think fearless living is the best topic to bring to love and dating because there's just so much at stake with our hearts and our wounds and I think that'll be so much fun.
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Morgana Rae: And then we'll get back to, and I will try to allow Devon to like
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Morgana Rae: I will really, really, really, really try to let Devin to get deeper and farther than just one point never happened, and it's fine.
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Morgana Rae: We'll get there. We'll get to get to all in some raisins. It's resolutions for yeah 2021
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Morgana Rae: So Rhonda Britain will be here next week. That'll be great. And I remember her I'VE MET HER, YOU'VE MET HER A million, a million times. That's good. A lot of times, right.
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Morgana Rae: So we're down we're down to a minute 30 Minute. Yes. So do you want to, what do you want to say about what giving you the floor. That's impossible.
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Morgana Rae: Okay, so. So anyway, so I would argue, step number one to be a good person is recognizing that you have this kind of thing where you have a sense of knowing what's right or wrong for you.
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Morgana Rae: I wish hard for guys. Well, I think it's hard for everybody. I think it's hard for everybody. I think because
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Morgana Rae: You know, we're down to 30 seconds within you know I just think it's hard for everybody. I think because we're especially now because we are mired with distractions of just
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Morgana Rae: Media and community and trying to be good people. That's the thing is it part of it is that we're trying to be good and nobody knows what good is so we're going to talk more about that next time. Right, yeah. In two weeks.
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Morgana Rae: So yeah, you are listening to Crazy Sexy mid life love radio go to Crazy Sexy midlife love to see our first 11 weddings.
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Morgana Rae: And join our crazy sex in with like love family and we will be back next week, Wednesday 5pm Pacific time with more Crazy Sexy midlife love and the spectacular Rhonda Britain and fearless living
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Morgana Rae: Thank you for listening. The Crazy Sexy midlife love please sign up to join our free love family at crazy sex midlife love
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Morgana Rae: To get alerts to live shows call in and ask questions or just listening and ladies. Don't forget to download Devon's free ebook women are smarter than men and other secrets marriage minded women need to know. Also available act crazy sexy mid life live
