Voices of Courage with Ken D Foster
Courage to Love with cohost Julie Potiker
Guest, Dr Gary Slayer
Why is it so hard for so many of us to wrap our attention around loving ourselves? Well for me, I thought the concept was a little to self-centered when I first considered it. I figured there were enough self-centered people in the world and why should I be one of them. Then I started thinking about all the times I showed up at work or a party, or even at a family event and I felt less than others. Have you ever had the thought you weren’t good enough or felt less than others? If so, this show can change your life. I am calling it The Courage to Love and I am your host Ken D Foster.
I remember a time when I showed up for work and I was sick and tired of being treated like a second-class citizen. I was always saying yes to the whims of my bosses and co-workers. I really didn’t seem to stand for anything, and I wanted to look good at all costs. But cost it did. Every time I was in people pleasing mode, and trying to make myself stand out by helping others, I would get sliced up with words by co-workers or would be friends who most likely also felt less than everyone else and was using me as there punching bag by gossiping about my faults to try and make themselves look good.
At the time if I was being really honest, I often felt overlooked, overburdened, and like I never really got what I wanted. But I really didn’t know what I wanted, except I was hoping to be appreciated and respected.
What I was doing was trying to appear good looking, nice, and kind to get other to validate me instead of looking within and discovering what I actually felt and wanted for myself. I was validating my identity by what other thought, instead of what I thought.
At some point in time I realized that focusing on what others think, do and say, left me empty and forgetting who I was and what I stand for.
It took me some time to stop living from the outside in. I had to clear a lot of misconceived beliefs, choices and actions of the past, but it was well worth it. Because I did the work and found myself. My real self. The Soul. Today, I know who I am, I know what I am and I know how I serve.
Why is this important for you? Because when you know who you are at the core and the values you stand for. You start to be less focused on others people’s opinions and more focused on how you think, choices that empower you and the actions you take, which improve your life and the lives of others.
If airplane you are on has an emergency and the oxygen masks are dispensed, you need to put your mask on first, and then take care of those around you. You are no good to anyone if you can’t breathe.
So what is the greatest block to love. Fear,
Story of doing the work in relationship, writing my help wanted reverse help-wanted ad, from Barbara DeAngeles, and started believing I could change form the inside out. Here is what I did and what you can do to start attracting love in your life.
I Look at what is not working
Get clear with you values
Start asking daily what do I stand for?
Have Strong Boundaries, non-negotiables
Bring in Love, Love is an energy a vibration
Loved being single, loved my simple life, Loved my friends
Make a commitment to play full out with loving yourself.
RE-WIRING THE RULES OF LOVE FOR SINCERE WOMEN AND MEN SO THEY CAN HAVE AND KEEP A LOVING, LASTING EXTRAORDINARY RELATIONSHIP.
Dr. Gary Salyer speaks to audiences across the country as a featured expert, inspirational speaker on how to create the love we all deserve. He is an expert in Attachment Theory, the science of relationships, Bert Hellinger's Family Systems approach and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). As a master transformational relationship coach, Dr. Gary helps people re-write the rules for love in their brains.
Dr. Salyer is the creator of the Safe to Love Again™ Workshop and the Extraordinary Couples™ and Extraordinary Singles™ Retreats. He is also a highly sought after guest on various podcasts, TV and radio shows such as The Aware Show on Hay House Radio.
Smart, savvy, professional women in their thirties, forties and fifties who are tired of the heartache in their love lives are resonating with the message of ‘safe to love again.’ Gary’s biggest passion is to help both singles and couples discover how they can have a loving sweetheart lying beside them at night, rather than a lonely pillow or a frustrated, distant partner.
Among Dr. Salyer’s strongest gifts is his ability to help clients stop making themselves wrong, no matter what painful patterns are happening in their relationships. Because of his innovative new theory on how to change people’s brain ‘wiring’ for love, both singles and couples experience deep shifts with lasting results that happen in an easy, natural way.
FREE GIFT: "Love Notes with Dr. Gary Salyer” - A collection of short, heartfelt and practical 3-4 minute videos that are designed to help both singles and couples find and create the love they deserve. One engaged couple in Oregon claims these videos saved their engagement and they are now happily married after implementing the insights and tools that are taught in these videos.
Each brief video will both inspire and show how you can create more real love in your life now, delivered to your inbox twice a week. Go to http://garysalyer.com/; scroll down and fill out the form in the section called “Love Inspirations.”
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