Race - Culture- Diversity – Inclusion – Empowerment – Leadership - Success

In 1969 my first assignment after basic training and schooling was at The United States Air Force Clark Air Base in The Philippines. After a twenty six hour flight, with a few stops along the journey, I arrived on my 19th birthday, took a walk around the base and followed towering lights that illuminated a football practice field. Leaning up against a fence I watched until the end of practice and found one of the coaches to whom I spoke about my desire to play. He told me to come back tomorrow night at 7 PM which I did. That resulted in me being given a practice uniform which I used the following night. I was lucky to be stationed in The Philippines where, in addition to being a beautiful country with wonderful people, music, customs, traditions, folklore, history, culture and FOOD, I had the opportunity to learn, grow and prosper with education, awareness and knowledge not available in the traditional learning environment. 

I planted myself on the defensive line where I stayed, started and played for two seasons making the all-star team both years. My life at Clark was filled with work, football, cards in the barracks on paydays. a bit of sightseeing and on occasion a visit to Angeles City for a San Miguel, food, music and participation in cultural and social activities. For many GI's it was the chance to do things that were just reaching the middle class in America and which have always existed in the lower and upper class of the economic strata. Given the chance to go back guys would be lined up for miles to return to indulge in pleasures they probably never told anyone outside of those who had similar experiences.

The best part of my entire two seasons was that I was the only White guy on the starting defensive team which was quite spectacular for many reasons. Before each game we would change into our uniforms in a “hut” near the field. As we were changing a bottle of Thunderbird (what’s the word Thunderbird, what’s the price .60 twice) was being passed around by the starting defensive players, of which I was one as previously mentioned. The bottle came to me. All my teammates’ eyes were on me and with their eyes they were saying “Will he”? Without hesitation I lifted the bottle to my mouth and downed a big swig of T-Bird. The guys all cheered and we “high-fived” each other in brotherhood. We had two winning seasons and a few of us made the All-Star Team. We saw no color except our green uniform jerseys. We lived, worked, played and socialized together. I miss the guys who often told me that “I had more soul than I could control”.  My life was enhanced, enriched and enlightened from the times I spent with the all the guys Black, White and everyone else. 

The barracks in which I lived had been integrated the year before I arrived at Clark. Before this, the Black guys lived in remote barracks on the fringes of the base. I never saw where they lived but some of the old timers told me stories about the conditions.

My barracks was filled with Blacks, Whites, Islanders, Hispanics and two Jews of which I was one. We never had a problem. Even the guys from the South publicly adjusted to showering and sharing bathroom facilities and dining halls with guys unlike them. In private, though, their stories were quite inflammatory but they never let their emotions deter from their job performance and co-habitation with guys with whom they had nothing good to say.

In the integrated barracks next to mine there were Black Panther meetings several times a week.  Only the Black guys went and they did not allow their attitudes, feelings, emotions and everything else spread to the public community.

I may be naïve, stupid, ignorant, unaware or just plain old dumb but I never heard about of any violence, property damage or physical altercations during my 18 months on base at Clark.

There was an active and profitable Black Market at Clark which was NOT named Black Market because only Black guys were involved. Free Enterprise, Business is Business. For those involved the only color was Green as it is today. We had cigarette and liquor ration vouchers which a few entrepreneurial and enterprising guys used for profit by servicing their customers since in all businesses without customers to service you have no business. 

Now customer disservice has trumped customer service and has become more of a customer self service and call 1-800-000-000 if you have a problem, issue or concern. (By the way, when calling 1-800 and prompted to press “1” for English only to wait forever to speak with a human, press “2” for Spanish since all the customer service folks speak English). One would sell their ration vouchers for a fixed price to the guys taking the risk and those guys would deliver the goods off base to downtown contacts who would sell the products to locals who were in the distribution business. Black Market Business just might be the second oldest profession. 

Downtown Angles City was a divided town. Right outside the main gate was known as The Strip where anybody could roam the streets, participate in various offerings, indulge in the street food, and ride in a beautifully decorated Jeep leftover from MacArthur during World War II.

A couple of miles from the Strip was The Block where only the Black guys could congregate for their social interactions. It was well known by all non-Black guys that one did not venture down on The Block since many incidents occurred to those who visited who were not part of the community and culture. Twice I went down on The Block. Both times escorted by my football Black teammates who insured my safety and well being. While walking the streets, eating and drinking I was watched, visually screened and made to feel quite uncomfortable and unsafe by those Americans and locals who did not know my identity. Several times the table I was at with my Black Teammates was approached and my Black Teammates had to explain me. This is probably how Blacks feel when they walk around a store followed by staring eyes waiting for something to happen or Blacks who drive through neighborhoods unlike where they live as they face the onslaught of looks, doubt, concern, worry and fear from the locals.

Clark had a movie theater. I went a few times but couldn’t tell you what was showing. I do remember that it was custom, tradition and mandatory to stand at “attention” while the National Anthem was being played. The only guys who did not stand were the Black guys so please do not consider the 2017 protests as something new. Though I did feel awkward and a bit confused from my lack of knowledge I did understand after a few of my Black Teammates explained their plight and provided reasons for their non-involvement in the pre-movie ceremony. They all told me that until I walk in their shoes please do not pass judgment. A little knowledge, insight and wisdom go a long way to understanding. By the way, this was around the same time as the Black Comedy (nothing racial about Black Comedy, Black Ice or Black Friday) movie “MASH” was circulating. It was banned by the leadership at Clark because of its insubordination and inappropriate content which may have caused and influenced behaviors, attitudes and values to change since through the magic words of comedy, satire and mockery rests truth. And we all know truth should set us free but in today’s world it continues to hide and be hidden through manipulated obfuscation. 

So, what does all this have to do with anything? Nothing much, if anything, at all. Only, perhaps, if we knew just a little about history, listen twice as much as we speak (two ears, one mouth, get it) and understood our own world we may just have the ability to focus on the important matters such as family, health, education, work, empowerment, critical thinking, communications, understanding, compassion, leadership, life-style, play, fun, laughter and everything else that has become an impediment to our society, culture and overall safety and well being.

By the way, the next time a Charlottesville event is scheduled anywhere in our country let’s have folks bring all the foods of their culture, nationality, ethnicity, religion and race and let the eating begin. Even those filled with hate will enjoy a good meal and leave wanting more of all that good stuff made, with LOVE, by those who they so ignorantly hate.

My solutions are all simple. Simple always works best. This is why folks get along with me since they like the simple things in life. Simply put: excuses explain failure while REASONS define SUCCESS.

Rudy Ray Moore

This true story is about my meeting the Legendary Compliance Rudy Ray Moore. I just watched Eddie Murphy play Rudy Ray Moore as Dolemite and was thrilled to re-live memories from decades past.

I worked for a flooring contractor during college at Temple University in North Philadelphia. I knew some local folks and during conversations I mentioned the business. Several asked if we would work in their North Philly neighborhood. I asked aren't there some local contractors. I was told no. Most don't want to come down here. I developed relationships and we were in North Philly every week doing 1-3 flooring jobs. One customer gave us a "tip" which was a cassette recording of Rudy Ray Moore's comedy.

We listened to the cassette of Dolemite every day for months recited each "bit" as we drove from job to job. One day while eating lunch I read in the newspaper that Rudy Ray Moore was coming to Philly for the premier of his Dolemite Movie.

We looked at each other and said "We're going"!!!

We had two weeks until the premier so we went about our business carefully scheduling work that would not interfere with our going to see Rudy as Dolemite in the movie.

Finally it was show day and time. We finished work early enough to get home, shower, change, eat and get to the movie theater in Downtown Philly around 6PM. The movie was scheduled to start at 8:00 PM.

We were the first to arrive. The ticket office was not open. By 6:30 PM the crowds began to arrive all standing around in front of the theater waiting for Rudy's arrival.

We stood in our spot to be first in line to but movie tickets. The crowds pinched towards the curb when the big white stretch limo arrived inching its way to the front of the theater. The limo stopped and didn't move for an eternal few minutes. That is when the passenger side front door opened and out came one of Rudy's crew. He went to the rear of the limo and opened the curbside door where Rudy's posse, ladies and the man himself, Rudy Ray Moore, emerged all dressed to the nines with Rudy wearing a white suit, white fur coat, wide rim brim and feathered boa.

The crowd went wild cheering, screaming Rudy's name and making room for Rudy and crew to move towards the theater entrance. We were still in our spot. As he got closer Rudy's eyes and my eyes met. He had a look of doubt on his smiling face. He came right to me and my boss, looked around and said, "What are you two doing here". Without hesitation we replied, "Rudy we love you. We listen to you every day and recite along with you". And with that we began to recite:, "The twelfth of May was one hell of a day.................. Rudy smiled with delight and said, "you two come with me". Rudy escorted us into the theater saying, "You two are my guests I got this for you" meaning we did not pay for our seats. Rudy went right to the middle of the center section of the movie theater, looked around, told his crew to sit and relax but to leave two seats next to Rudy for his two fans.

Rudy sat down. An elderly lady sitting right behind Rudy asked Rudy if was going to wear his Brim throughout the movie. Rudy replied. No ma'am. Momma raised me be better than that. The lady thanked Rudy, praised his Mom for raising a fine son and replied "I know she did" with a Huh-Um for emphasis.

We all loved the movie. People applauded at the end. Rudy stood, smiled and waved at everybody.

Out on the street the crowd stayed seeking one last glimpse, maybe a picture or autograph from Rudy. He was most accommodating and obliged everyone who came his way. We did not have a camera only great memories we shared everyday for years after our meeting the Great Rudy Ray Moore, comedian, actor, entertainer and gentleman. 

Our Kids

Our daughter earned a fellowship to attend graduate school at a university in the Southern United States. 

Part of her curriculum was to work at a Black high school as an Athletic Trainer. She was the first white person many of the students saw up close and personal. Several girls would affectionately touch her curly hair not ever seeing this before. Often she was invited to have her lunch in the cafeteria with the kids and staff as well.

One day our daughter called and told us that many of the football athletes had to make a choice everyday: Breakfast or lunch, not both. We told our daughter to keep granola bars, crackers, juice boxes and Gatorade in her office for when a kid says or looks like he’s hungry.

My wife and I went to visit our daughter for a weekend. On Friday afternoon we walked around the local university and saw many unique and wonderful sites. We needed to use the bathroom. We asked some students who walked us to the nearby dining hall. They told us to just go inside and you’ll find what you need.

We walked in and immediately the two ladies working the check in desk simultaneously said, “you must be Miss Rosie's folks”, to which my wife replied, “what gave it away”. We all laughed and were told where to find the bathrooms.

On our way out the ladies said, “where you going?” to which my wife replied, ”to get some dinner before we go to the Friday night football game”. We were pleasantly asked to go over there, get a tray, silverware and your dinner. The cake is homemade and a scoop of ice cream on top is what we do around here. Keep your money in your pocket. If you come to our home you’re our guest, same here.

We indulged, perhaps overindulged, in the famous and well-known Southern Hospitality.

After dinner and on our way out we were asked, “you going to the game, right” to which we replied yes to see the game and watch our daughter at work.

We were led outside by one of the ladies who said, “see that man across the street leaning against the fence?” We said Yes. That’s my husband. He has your passes to get into the stadium. You are welcome to sit with us but we’re a four-generation family who loves the game and our kids so it might get a little loud and emotional. We fit right in sharing more common ground, family that is.

We walked across the street, met with the husband and walked together to their section of seating. Again, we were told to keep our money in our pockets.

We had a grand and glorious evening of football and family made possible by our daughter, who was known to most everyone in town, and the generosity, kindness and love from folks who were open, accepting and gracious to us strangers.

Our son worked for a Black State Representative while a student at a western Pennsylvania university. He rode the bus, walked through the neighborhood and provided valuable administrative services to the community constituents. He was well received in the community, made many friends and acquaintances, said hello to the locals on his walk up the hill and enjoyed the many “goodies" brought by those for whom he provided well received and much needed services.

Two kids who grew up in vanilla land (my fault) and who adjusted quite well working and living among folks from cultures, and backgrounds different from theirs.

School Attendance

After four years of Military Service, three years overseas, I graduated Temple University in 1977 with a degree in education and a teaching certificate.

I began working as a substitute teacher at Edison High School at 8th and Lehigh. My Dad and his brothers went there when it was known as Northeast High School.

I arrived early to sign in, receive paperwork, documents and attendance charts none of which were provided so I improvised the day's work having brought educational materials with me which I learned to do from my student teaching supervisor. I took attendance on a lined piece of paper to have a record of who was in class and the time of attendance.

I was given a list of names to use as a guide and reference. There was very little similarity between the list I was provided and the names that appeared on the list of names I gathered.

After the school day was over I went to the office to turn in the attendance and work that was given to the students.

I was almost out of the office when I heard a voice call to me, “young man please don’t leave, I need to speak to you”. I honored this request.

I was asked if I knew what I was doing and more significantly what I had done with the attendance log with no mention of the kids work which was strewn across a desk headed for the trash.

I was asked to explain the attendance log I handed in. I said that it shows who was in class by name and the total number of kids in class for each period. My records showed perhaps twelve kids in home room, eight kids in periods one and two, five kids in period three, four kids in period four and nobody in class the rest of the day for each class. The attendance numbers may be off but it does show a steady decline in attendance as the school day progressed.

I was told that’s not how we do things here. Every kid is in every class all day every day. That’s how we get money. I was told to change my records to reflect this attendance policy.

I politely told the office staff that I just graduated college with my degree and teaching certification and I will not put those in jeopardy as well as my reputation, by doing what you are asking me to do.

I respectfully excused myself, walked out of the building and did not go back.

This occurred in 1977.

Fast forward to 2017.

My family and I were attending our nephews wedding in Western Pennsylvania. The hotel was full, hence the breakfast room was overflowing with hungry customers.

My wife found a table which we shared with a family attending a different wedding. We shared the table, a meal and friendly neighborly conversation.

As the room emptied I stayed to indulge in a cookie or two. One of the guys, sitting with us, and I started a conversation with the usual where ya’ from, whose wedding are you with, comfortable room?, nice day for a wedding.

He and I spoke some more and found out we shared common ground in school, degree and work. He told me he completed college with a degree in education and teaching certificate. He worked as a Substitute Teacher in several Philly Schools. He told me his age which was thirty five. I told him I was sixty seven. He then told me of his experience and frustration not just with substitute teaching (which we all know is a challenge) but with the school system of tracking attendance.

He then told me an almost exact duplicate of the story I just told you about school attendance records. He too, was given no lessons for the day. He, too, reported decreasing numbers of students in attendance as the day progressed.  He, too, was asked to change his attendance records. He, too, did not comply stating the same reasons I used. He, too, walked out of the building not returning to substitute teaching. He ventured out into the business world which is what I did as well.

Now, why is this story of interest? It’s not. Our two similar stories forty years apart is the story.

Reading from a 2019 Philadelphia Inquirer story on the same topic, school attendance, offers journalistic proof and credibility to my story and the story the man at the breakfast table told me.

The more things change the more they stay the same except here where things did not change.

When we are not aware of history, it is destined and doomed to be repeated.

When kids know just a little bit about history they become aware, educated and empowered as they realize they are not the first generation to experience these horrific conditions in the schools and on the streets.

They have an awakening just like the kid who goes away for school, military or work and comes home several years later telling their elders, “gee, it’s incredible how much and what you have learned in the years I have been away”.

Military Veterans Coming Home

My Dad, my Brother and our Uncles served in the Military most during World War Two. Dad went on to work for the US Army retiring in 1979 as Civilian Commander of The Frankford Arsenal in Philadelphia. I served in the USAF from 1969-1973.

We all served with pride, grace and dignity. 

When the troops came back to The USA after WWII they returned to a warm, inviting and welcoming population and deservedly so.

Things were different in 1973.

Leaving Okinawa I was in a plane that was filled with GI's all going to Travis AFB most of us for separation purposes.

Once the paperwork was complete a flight was scheduled for me from Travis to Philadelphia, PA, non-stop, affectionately named "The Red Eye".

The plane left Travis around 10 PM arriving in Philadelphia around 6 AM.

I was in summer uniform, no coat, jacket or other warming gear.

I gathered my "stuff", duffle bag, overnight bag, garment bag and the paperwork. I, then, proceed to exit the Philadelphia Airport.

Schlepping all my "stuff" I took a taxi, subway and bus to Dad's office at The Frankford Arsenal. I was warmly welcomed at the Main Gate. The staff on duty phoned Dad's office where the office administrator, Mary, answered the call from the Main Gate.  I knew Mary for many years, since, as a kid visiting Dad at work and also using the on base swimming pool with Mom and my Brother was part of our summer routine. Ride the bus, transfer to a second bus and arrive at the main gate. Mary always had candy of some kind in a dish which she always invited us to eat. "You don't have to tell the Ford Boys more than once'' is what Mom told Mary.

The Main Gate staff asked Mary if Dad was in his office to which she replied "Yes". I could hear Mary talking and crying.

An Army Jeep arrived at the Main Gate. Leaving all my 'stuff" in the Main Gate I got in the Army Jeep for the ride to Dad's office which was in the Headquarters Building. Upon arrival, I got out, ran the steps, entered the HQ Building, climbed more steps, turned the corner and saw Mary and several others crying covering their mouths and faces so as not to make noise. With a big smile on my face I put two fingers on my lips as if to say, "SHHHHH. 

I turned another corner, the door was open, I showed my face and said DAD!!! Dad looked up, dropped his pen, which I still have, on his desk and said, "My Son". We approached each other, shook hands and hugged. Dad's first question was, "Did you eat breakfast"? I said, "No".  We walked to the mess hall, where Dad knew everyone, and sat at a table filled with Veterans, acknowledged each other, ate some food and I heard my first "Welcome Home".

You see. When I was riding in the taxi, subway and bus nobody said anything to me. Most closed their eyes and faked sleep or hid behind the newspapers which were read every day during the commute to work and back home on public transportation. No eye contact. No comments. No gestures. Nothing. This was fine with me since I wasn't looking for anything. I just wanted to see and be with my family.

Returning Veterans back then were not as welcomed as is the case today and for reasons I respect, understand and appreciate. We were not among those with good reputations and were all grouped together as something less than civil. Today, Veterans from back then suffer and struggle with illnesses, physical and mental, that are difficult to prove based on the lack of paperwork and no trust in a Veterans word. I battle arthritis in my ankles and knees which I can attribute to my time in the Military though I do so quietly. Yes, I cope, manage and tolerate the silent threat that comes with PTSD, again for which I have no “proof”.

No parades for us nor did I want one. I am not, as were many of my contemporaries, much of a look at me, look at me type guy. Today parades abound in style, fashion and vogue. The screens are filled with "onions" showing returning Veterans arriving, unannounced to their kids who are at school. The guys I knew just wanted to serve, go back to the world and get on with their lives and families.

Dad reached in his pocket and tossed me his car keys. “Now go home and surprise Mother”, Dad said.

I don't remember the drive to our home but when I got there I parked the car in front of our home. No horn honking which would spoil the surprise. I walked to the front door, rang the bell, rang the bell again then knocked on the door. Mom's not home. She's probably volunteering at the school or on her daily walk to the stores to buy tonight's dinner and perhaps a doughnut for herself from Mrs. Feldman's Bakery.

I began pacing the sidewalk anxiously awaiting Mom's return home. A neighbor saw me. He came out, welcomed me home and asked if he could do anything for me. I said, "Can I call my Brother'? Of course, the neighbor said. I called my Brother who lived about two miles from our home. Coincidentally, luckily or spiritually my Brother was home waiting to go to work in the afternoon.

I asked my Brother if he could come to our home. He said, "Why". I said, "cause I'm here"!!! My Brother said, “I knew it, I knew it. I knew you would come home without telling anyone. I'm on my way".

My Brother arrived at our home within a few minutes. He said, "You crazy SOB come here"? We hugged and hugged some more. 

We got into his car and drove to the stores where we knew we would find Mom. Nothing. Not at the bakery, butcher, 5 and 10, dress shop, ACME, pharmacy. Nowhere. Where was Mom?

My Brother drove us back to our home with me being on the street side of his car. Mom was at the door, looking out and I know she was wondering why Dad's car was home so early in the work day. I got out of the car and walked towards the front door. From a distance Mom didn't recognize me but as I got closer she saw it was me and soon began to shake, tremble and cry.  She opened the door, I entered our home and we hugged for an hour or it seemed like an hour, before we separated and Mom said, "I knew it, I knew it. I knew you would do this".

My reply to Dad, Mom and Brother was, “How many chances will I have to do this again”. So I did it. They all understood and were happy to have me home.

By the way, you may be wondering how I missed finding Mom. Easy answer. She stopped by a neighbor's home to chat, that's what we once did in our country, and part of their discussion was, "so when is Marty coming home"? Mom had no answer until I gave her one.

That night several relatives and neighbors came by our home for a visit. As was the custom in our neighborhood and community one never went to a home, especially on a happy occasion, without a white box filled with sweet treats from Mrs. Feldman's Bakery.

Our home, filled with familiar and welcoming faces along  with the contents of the little white bakery boxes was all I needed to make feel HOME.

Two days later I started work as a laborer for my Brothers high school friend who had a small floor covering business and needed a pair of hands. That work and The GI Bill is how I paid for college.

No parades. No ceremonies. No Onions. Different times justify different results. All of which I am fine with. No regrets. No feeling left out or overlooked. No feeling of exclusion. All these things are fleeting and temporary. Family and Home are permanent and of value far beyond anything such as a parade, signs, banners and anything deemed stylish, trendy and a ratings booster.

Some might say it is never too late to thank, appreciate, celebrate and observe. I sort of agree. However, I say it's time to move on, learning from the past, living in the present and preparing for the future.

PLAY

The Value, Importance and Significance of: 

PLAY

Pickup Basketball

Pickup Basketball, a world and ecosystem known and understood only by the folks who play.

While there are organized, structured and defined leagues where players register, pay fees, stack their team, wear uniforms, are bound by the leagues rules and referees judgement and perhaps even a trophy there is always Pickup Basketball.

Pickup ball has its own unique charm, grace, dignity, reputation and process.

Game starts at the playground at 7 PM during the week and as early as 8:30 AM on the weekends so that players can get a run in and have time for personal, business and most important family events especially preparing to get their kids to all the year round sports available for kids to learn, grow and play which is a different type of play described at the end of this writing.

Pickup ball has players wearing the latest gear except the old guys who still wear old school stuff literally from their high school days.

Pickup ball begins with the leader, actually the guy who maintains the email list for notifications and a few bucks in the bank, doing their best to make evenly matched teams which is good for the first game but can quickly become lopsided depending on who arrives to play as well as who can make a free throw to earn a spot on the team who has next.

Pickup ball is therapeutic though many of the players are unaware of this. Pickup provides a release of energy, anger, anxiety, stress and a brief escape of the things going on at work and at home. Nothing like a hard run, buckets of sweat and a game winning shot to provide relief for what ails ya. It’s temporary, which is why we keep going back for more pickup ball.

Players mostly feel better at games end since in addition to all the benefits listed above the body produces and releases those feel good conditions coming from the brain. My Dad and I played tennis and racquetball for many years later in life. Dad would tell he was tired with a few aches but overall he felt great. Ah, the power of the human spirit and condition coming your way all in harmony with nature.

Pickup ball is the forum to talk sports, discuss your bets, get out of the house and participate in a healthy, positive, powerful and empowering activity that players look forward to each week.

Pickup ball is generally user friendly, however, there are times when the heat enters the game from, emotionally, blame, frustration and the thought of losing especially if there’s a two or more game wait. Sort of makes them quite competitive, aggressive and high spirited. Yes, a physical altercation can occur mostly when new blood plays for the first time entering a domain that is highly protected by the regulars.

Pickup ball began for me at age fifteen which is fifty five years ago. From the beginning until pre-pandemic I played the same game. Short, squat, slow with no skills but I tried to do all the things that do not appear in the scorecard. Hustle, play tough “D”, make the extra pass, box out, rebound and get the loose ball.

I played pickup ball at a playground that was a Mecca for ballers. Guys drove 20-30 miles for the game. One night I got on a team that was me and four athletic formidable basketball players all of whom were Black. They came together and were looking for a fifth player. They asked if I got next. I said yep, it’s just me waiting. With that our team was set. 

We played our first game and won. Winners stay and play. That was at 7 PM. By 9:30 we were still playing having won all our games. At game's end my teammates came to say, “you all right” which for me was an honor. By the way, the only time I touched the ball was when I got a rebound or hustled for a loose ball. Those four guys had their game and I was happy to be on their team doing what I do best and as always a little bit more.

Pickup Racquetball

Pickup racquetball was a great game, competitive and a great one hour workout which often found me drained and juiced at the same time. I often found it difficult to fall asleep after night’s games that usually ended after ten PM when the non-prime hourly playing fees were half price.

Racquetball Tournaments were often held at various clubs in the area. Of course priority was given to club members and opened to outsiders when spots were available. It was a small community of tournament players, usually and most “A” rated players.

I played in several club tournaments where I was a member. Player’s games were familiar and I knew each of their strengths. I was a B-C level player so in tournaments I wanted to play B level players since I grew up believing you got better by playing better players.

What I found was many of those A level players would drop down to the B category just for tournaments in order to ensure they would get a trophy by playing guys like me and the other legit B level players. Most games weren’t even close. 

Pickup Soccer

When our kids played youth soccer I asked some of the parents if they wanted to kick the soccer ball in a “game” against the kids.

What began with five parents playing with and against their kids quickly, in a matter of two weeks, grew to a 7 v 7 game on Sunday mornings at the local field. Kids played Saturday while us grown up kids played Sunday.

That was twenty five years ago. The game today is a combination of highly skilled players all of whom played in high school, colleges, clubs and leagues. They are an international group from Europe, Asia, South America, The Middle East and a core contingent of Americans. And then there is “scrub”)me) who has less soccer skills than basketball skills, but who got it going letting word of mouth advertising and marketing build the group to over fifty players if everyone showed up on game day. I don’t make this known but I do get pleasure from the weekly or even twice weekly games. 

Fathers bring their middle school and high school sons so their kids get a chance to “play up” against elders who guide, teach and encourage the kids while at the same time developing confidence, trust and skills.

When the college or living on their own kids are in town for a family visit they always know where to find the basketball and soccer pickup games. Now that makes me feel good.

One thing I learned is that most of the European kids speak multiple languages since travel, knowledge and education are easily accomplished in many closely located countries with easy access among many European countries.

The common ground of camaraderie is vital to pickup ball. Knowing you are going and playing the game you love with like-minded players is an additional healing agent contributing to mental health wellbeing.  

Pickup Baseball

When our son was in Mendham Borough Park summer day camp I would pick him up around noon. At home we would eat lunch and he would relax until 2 PM when he and I would ride bikes, swim or attempt to fish at the mud hole. This got old real fast and I knew I had to do something. I went back to my youth. 

My wife and I got on the telephone and sent e-mails to the families of the kids from day camp who I knew were in town and probably struggling with the same boredom as my son and I. Our message was simple: Pick-up baseball at Borough Park. Bring your glove, bat and water. 

The first day nine kids showed up and I did infield and batting practice with them. By the third day 26 kids showed up ranging in age from third to ninth grade. The first game I appointed two kids as managers /captains. After that the kids took over sharing leadership roles. They had to choose teams fairly, make the batting order and assign field positions which were to be changed every inning or two so that each kid had the chance to play as many positions as desired. I did the pitching to keep the game moving. Kids came on foot, by bike, scooters and by car. Parents could stay or they could do whatever they had or wanted to do. 

I scheduled the game to go from 2-4 PM when parents would arrive to take their kids home. No one wanted to be the first to take their kid home and many were the times that we played until 5-6 PM when I would take the initiative by shutting things down. The kids went home tired, hungry and ready for tomorrow.  Often I would get calls at home from kids and parents wanting to know if the game was on for tomorrow. A few had out of town visitors and called asking if the visitors could play. Of course was my response.

This is what kids should be doing. Playing without the yelling, screaming, hollering, rude, crude, socially unacceptable, embarrassing “grown-ups” and certainly without trophies, pictures, snacks and goodie bags. The kids were outdoors where they belonged, having fun, resolving their own issues, learning about life and just having fun at play.

Dads would call asking if they could participate. I said, of course, but the only thing you can do is pitch without commentary. At first they wanted to do everything but soon learned and were encouraged by me to back away and let the kids be kids.

Those kids are approaching their thirties. When I meet one of the kids around town, when they are in town, they always thank me for providing pickup ball. I tell them there is no need to thank me. The best way to thank me is to do the same or similar for their kids and all the kids in the neighborhood.

As we go our ways they always ask, “Hey coach, pickup ball today”?  My reply is to quote legendary Hall of Fame Chicago Cubs Shortstop and Army Veteran Ernie Banks, who when asked a similar question always responded with his trademark “Let’s play two”. A message of hope and optimism even back in the 1950’s and 1960’s when social and racial conditions were as polarized as they are today.

Life Lessons and Skills learned on the field of playing pickup ball in addition to experts providing their professional, licensed, certified and credentialed expertise often in an office setting for an hour each week.

Leadership 

Patience

Organization 

Communications

Critical Thinking

Time Management 

Sharing

Negotiations 

Mentoring 

Respect

Trust

Listening 

Conflict Resolution 

Emotional Regulation 

Anger Management 

Patience

Competition

FUN, getting dirty, sweaty, laughing and of course PLAYING

Jump Rope

When our kids were of elementary and middle school age we would go to a vacation spot that had a lake, camp for the kids and a town center park where at night I brought out the thirty foot jump rope, and along with my parents who took turns holding one end of the rope while I held the other end, we would turn the rope with our kids taking turns in joining and in and out of the jump ripe cycles.

It didn't take long before there was a line of kids from elementary age through high school and even some college kids who all waited for their turn to jump rope. Several parents who were watching had the urge to jump in on the fun and they were certainly welcomed by the kids. The parents who participated got some exercise as well as talk therapy by telling tales of their youth jumping rope, hop-scotching and swinging on the playground swings.

At first it was one at a time which soon progressed, at the suggestion of the kids, if they could have several kids jump rope at the same time. That's all I needed to hear and know. I knew the kids wanted to do this since the idea came from them and did not have to "pry" from the depths of their souls where so much "stuff" accumulates and festers.

What began with four kids all jumping rope soon blossomed into a line-up of 18 kids of all ages and sizes waiting for the rope to turn. After several attempts which resulted in only two turns the kids and the rope turners got into a rhythm resulting in those 18 kids successfully jumping 33 times. They were a competitive bunch and wanted to jump again to break the record which they did eventually jumping 55 times before fatigue and exhaustion set in leaving them tired but happy, smiling and proud of their work.

I recall one kid solo jumped 412 times. Others who were watching showed their competitive spirit by trying to jump more than the 412 times which many did, mostly the older kids who had a bit more stamina and endurance than the younger kids. In addition to physical and mental exercise it was a vocabulary learning experience as well.

As darkness set in and my parents and I were tired from turning the rope thousands of times, we were approached by several parents who came to us to express their thanks and gratitude for providing the evening, after dinner, what do we do, activity for their kids. They all asked the same question: "same time tomorrow night"? Of course they were told. Bring other kids who night enjoy jump rope.

The jump rope activity went on for five years with the same and some new and different kids taking part in the fun and PLAY. When our kids were away at college in the summer my wife and I returned to the jump rope scene to reminisce. We found that there was no jump rope on the agenda since no "adult" had taken the leadership role to organize the event. For me it just happened because I wanted it to happen. I knew kids would respond and participate when given the opportunity to show their stuff. I will never know but I am most certain that at least one of the jump rope kids, who are now in their 20's and 30's, are the ones holding and turning the rope for their kids and the neighborhood kids as well. 

Marty’s Mounds of Manure

MARTY’S MEANINGLESS

MINDFUL MINDLESS MOUNDS OF MANURE

Mayhem from My Cranium!!!

The World, or perhaps just MY world, is 5% percent Facts surrounded by 95% percent of Mounds of Manure

Extracted from my vast warehouse and storage facility of tidbits of useless information.

Limited by Truth and Facts

Copyright 2020

All Rights Reserved

Marty’s Mounds of Manure

Marty Ford, Author

Here’s a good way to begin your read:

Dedications

Acknowledgements

Affirmations

Recognitions

Shout Outs

Marty’s Mounds of Manure is all of the above with Love for my family, for whom you must sympathize, since they had to live in “MUD” picking up their feet and wiping their shoes because the Manure got very deep. Also, it got so deep their eyes turned brown.

Everyone else, all over the world, is included in this tribute because I don’t want to leave anyone out for fear of hurting someone’s feelings!!!

You’re all MEMBERS of Marty’s Mounds of Manure Mania

Give Me Some Butter, I’m on a Roll!!!

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Center of Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure where it’s time to get a little Silly while, in the process of laughing to yourself and not “LOL”, you might be thinking, yeah, that’s’ me or I’ve seen that or you may just decide to click the exit button.

EXAMPLE: Add the following to my previously Posted list of the differences between men and women.

At a rather formal event where proper attire is required the big room which is decorated like a museum complete with funeral amounts of flowers, or those so called reality television shows, (perfect – perfect- perfect when perfect does not exist, except in bowling, read at the bottom, only in the minds of the imperfect) where the colors are coordinated from the entrance throughout the building including the bathrooms and where cloth napkins are folded and refolded and refolded every time someone looks at the cloth napkin, two women enter wearing the same expensive, custom made, name brand designer, one of a kind ensemble, dress, shoes, bag and all. Eye contact is made. Guests begin to murmur and mumble covering their mouths not for pandemic protection but to hide from lip-readers and the embarrassment, shame and torment felt by the two ladies in the same gear.

The two women retreat, perhaps beyond the exit to the car and leave. On a few occasions there might be a confrontation nay, altercation, verbal and physical, however nothing can be done to correct the situation until the women return to the store of purchase demanding an explanation and of course their money back, as well as, compensation for pain and suffering. This is how beauty is reduced to the behaviors of the less sophisticated, haughty and you know THOSE people.

A hundred men attend the same event wearing a black tuxedo, white shirt, cummerbund, black highly shined and polished (or fake) shoes, bow tie and they are told, “my, you have good taste”.

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Signs of the Weak by the Weak for much much much longer than a week since it happens everyday.

When someone repeatedly, ad nauseam, has to tell you how great they are, they are NOT.

This is similar to a salesperson telling a prospective customer all the negatives about the competition.

Rather than state the benefits, qualities and virtues of their products and services it becomes reduced to putting down, knocking, criticizing and bad-mouthing the competition causing some, millions in today’s world, to believe the fabricated stories about others. It follows the flow of, the more you hear something the more believable it becomes. Truth does not matter, enter or play a part in the process. Manipulation, control with a heavy, very heavy does of manure. Add in smiles, personality, guilt, imagery and rehearsed speech and you have the recipe found on the electronic screens convincing you to switch funds from your accounts to theirs.

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Nature provides and beautifies the world with a colorful and “scentful” (don’t know if Webster has included this word but maybe next year it will) array of fruits, vegetables and flowers.

When displayed they cause the salivary glands to work overtime, as we anticipate their taste, textures and flavors.

After consumption, digestion and preparation for elimination where, in the end, everything turns brown except for corn on the cob which is eaten, chewed and most often removed from the body in the form of an in tact full kernel retaining its original color

Play-doh is similar with color changes. All those beautiful, fun and attractive colors, when mixed together, turn brown or is it grey.  Of course I could be and am probably wrong since what I know about art would echo in a thimble and since our home has been cleared of kids stuff I don’t have materials with which to experiment, I defer to the experts out there to provide their information, knowledge and wisdom for correction purposes. Please, hold the criticism.

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There’s a new form of counting and identifying money:

We have millions, billions, trillions, quadrillions, quin-trillions and perhaps many more the more educated folks can provide.

At the top of any list will always be:

Brazilians

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Friends: Look and listen closely. The word friends is used before family especially in marketing, advertising and promotions: Tell your friends and family……….. Seems a bit out if order but like many things the more you hear and see something the more likely you will become a repeating, trained and conditioned follower. I know that is NOT who you are so pay attention and go with your heart.

Friends, not a television show, nothing to do with religion though there are those who will argue their case and certainly an overused, somewhat cliche and what has been reduced to a emptiness in meaning, purpose and most of all definition. Remember, the power of definition from previous posts.

The cry is often, “I have 500 friends on social media (which is actually A-social media) and nobody with whom to talk or maybe have lunch. They’re known as “Frein-gers” not because they are strange (unusual – different- weird and so forth) but because we just don’t know who they are and with the exception of their place of birth, birth date, schools and work we know absolutely nothing about these folks and you know what, this may be good, since the truth and value of a friend is work, time consuming, often draining, yet often fun and pleasurable if just for companionship and we just can’t handle much more than perhaps, 2-3 “friends”.

A-Social media is a numbers game as folks search for those with some common ground to develop a remote distant relationship often leaving an emptiness, after you click send / post and especially when you do not get an instant immediate response and the waiting game begins like girls waiting for guys to call again. Similar to screen meetings instead of in-person with human to human contact. Throw enough mud against a wall and some will stick. Same with A-social media and “Friends”

EXAMPLE: Friend Definition

So, it’s three in the morning. You’re driving around lost, oh excuse me, misplaced which is akin to someone denying they are lying more of they mis-spoke, you have one bar on your flip-phone or 3% percent charge of your modern phone, it’s raining and foggy, the yellow/ amber light indicating low fuel is illuminated, you threw up from over indulging, you had an argument with your “SO”and you didn’t click send at 11:59 PM to submit your work for the midnight deadline.

What do you do? More importantly who do you call before the ghost busts?

Your first call finds you asking for help only to be told “dude I gotta go to work in five hours. Down to 2%.

Your second call finds you asking for help only to be told, “dude, I just got in from partying. Down to 1%.

Your third call finds you explaining the details when you are interrupted with,”dude (can’t get enough dude. by now it may be rude and a bit crude and overused) dude, where are you I’ll track and find you with my phone adding a bit of suspense like the movies, get in your car, lock the doors and in the famous words of Power Rangers Jason and Tommy, you hear, “I’m on my way”.

No need to elaborate about who is your friend. You will do the same for them. Most of those in our lives are acquaintances. Folks we don’t socialize with except in a gathering, small setting or at an event like a concert. Certainly not folks with whom we feel comfortable and confident in telling our stories though women do these things while men still watch the games or give the gaming “controller” a good workout.

Your friend will call the next day, like doctors once did and some still do, to follow-up and check in on your well being.

See how I used “three” examples. Three must have mystical, spiritual and magical powers, oops meaning, thus definition. See how so many things are woven, connected and aligned. Grammatically this is a series of three but with two commas used, which I think the learned, scholarly, certified and credentialed experts have changed adding a third comma before the word “and”.

Get three bids is the cry in the business world, perhaps for homeowners as well.

Good things happen in threes.

Not so good things happen in threes.

Three strikes and your out.

300 is a perfect score when bowling. This might just be the only place where perfect can be accomplished.

Trifecta at the race track.

Match any three and win the scratch off lottery prize.

Three outs in a baseball inning.

Hockey’s Hat Trick.

Enough already, don’t you think?

Like what I write and you read? I hope and expect you to feel good about yourself after reading each post. Like kids are taught or should be taught at home, school or by watching Barney the Dinosaur if it is still on the television though it can be found, I am most certain, on YouTube. Sharing is good and makes you feel good doing something for someone else. Is it not what a Friend would do? So do me, and you a sharing favor and let those in your world, Friends and acquaintances, enter my world as described in the opening statement.

Question: If Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence and Pete fell off who’d be left?

Ponder for a few seconds.

I know you said Repeat which is what I would do if telling you this in person or even of the various screens with fake in person capabilities.

Believe it or not I have used this rather juvenile “joke” with some folks who actually said “repeat” 3-4 times before they got it.

No Title: Just More Good Stuff

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Nation where today there are a few items to enhance, enrich, enlighten, empower, educate and empower your world. Oh yeah, there may be an opportunity for you to raise your awareness, think and even chuckle at what you read, at least this is my goal.

LEADERSHIP: Is it do as I say (I’m the Boss) (or else) (because I said so) and not as I do?  I have been in situations like that and probably you have too. It’s not fun. Rather it is poisonous, venomous and in today’s vernacular Toxic. For most of us there is not much we can do except tolerate, withstand and hope for a change either for ourselves or of the leader (lower case small “l” among other small things) who is not really a leader (lower case small “l” among other small things) but more of a prime example of a bully. With leaders who are bully’s: Time Heals all Wounds and Time Wounds all Heels. Eventually, they become known and move on and out leaving behind those who need to rebuild, recover, reconnect with life as they like it. Whew!!! Finally!!! I can breathe again!!!

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Have you ever noticed how Great – Wonderful – Exciting – Thrilling – Exceptional – Significant- Spectacular – Extraordinary – Marvelous – Superb – Fantastic – Glorious – Magnificent – Impressive – Splendid – Awesome and any superlatives you know that I have left out things are: UNTIL THEY ARE NOT!!! 

The novelty of “new-ness” is short lived and wears off like a kid with a new toy that is played with for about five minutes and then replaced by a different  / newer one that provides the kid some comfort. Please don’t do this with your kids. Okay, you can and will do it one time but from that experience you will learn a valuable life lesson about being in charge, you’re the boss so be firm, consistent and accepting of the tears. Better yet, take the kid outside and let PLAY become their toy

For many, especially those who rarely if ever PLAYED, this attitude goes with them throughout life making them miserable, unfulfilled, dis-satisfied and probably constipated which itself is enough to alter attitudes, values and behaviors. I’ll show you. I’m gonna hold on for ever or until I explode or implode as may happen.

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Achievement is fine, happens all the time. Perhaps you have an abundance of achievements like youth sports trophies, ribbons and medals you were given for showing up rather earning the trophy, ribbon and medal through hard work, enhancing your skills and being a decent person. This can lead to an unhealthy future since one day you will find out that you are not as good at something as you’ve always been told: Good Job. God Job. Good Job. Making mistakes and errors is part of the learning process. If you do not fail at something and your life is filled with all good “stuff” then what happens when its Prom time and you get some pimples.

When you Achieve it is usually a goal that was pursued with a plan, direction, structure and reward. Let’s say a diploma, certificate, degree, etc.

Overcoming is Better.

When you overcome you Feel Good About Yourself, mostly because you did something you and those in your world thought you could or would not be able to do. I will be the Example here: What I know about Art would echo in a thimble. Yet, I created Art and received an affirmation from a well known non-Art organization. No fame, glory, money, notoriety, trophy or goodie-bag, just the word “awesome” that was sent my way. Yes, I did feel good about myself which makes me want to do more.

When you Overcome you have, perhaps, been knocked down (not physically but in other sprint depleting, pride deflating and energy sapping ways such as being bullied) and somewhere and somehow  you gather yourself to find the strength and courage to Get Up Get Out and Get Going only to meet with the same situations causing you grief and needing to once again Overcome which You Shall.

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Do you know folks who complain about not having any money as they are sipping their four dollar morning hot beverage, talking on the newest model of cell phone making reservations at the newest, latest hottest (expensive) restaurant while driving a fully loaded vehicle, wearing brand name clothing with all the “right” labels affixed for everyone to see, notice and say ooh-ahh.

Take a look around, even in the mirror. Be Aware. Be Alive. Be YOURSELF. I know that is one more “be” than t(w)o be or not t(w)o be, however, this is more of a statement and not a question found in literature.

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Does a Big Wheel Roll?

Does a Deer with Antlers need a Hat Rack?

Does the right the bare arms mean I can go about my day wearing short sleeve shirts?

Now this is just silly, some may say juvenile while others might call it ridiculous. Hey, it’s my Blog and for here in this moment I have the power of definition which is where absolute power lives (before, during and after it corrupts), in the power of definition.

If you have named a pet, boat or baby you have the power of definition. Feels good, doesn’t it? Think how those who create rules, laws and policies ( leaders, again the lower case small “l” among other small things) feel when they use their power, not just for personal gain, but for the good of us or so we are told, persuaded, convinced and mandated.

Time For a TIME-OUT

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary TIME where today TIME is of the Essence, TIME has Come Today, as said by the Chambers Brothers and TIME is your Friend.

The TIME is upon us to start doing rather than reacting with ignorance, arrogance, hate, anger and violence.

The TIME is upon us to learn, grow and prosper.

The TIME is upon us to be open, welcoming and understanding. I’m so understanding I cannot understand anyone not understanding me. (Lenny Bruce version is better and paraphrased here).

The TIME is upon us to obtain, retain and maintain CONTROL.

The TIME has come to leave division for math class.

The TIME is NOW and here’s HOW.

EXAMPLE: I grew up in a city of neighborhoods each with its own culture, music, traditions, customs, religion, folklore, language, history, art, dance, clothing and FOOD. Oh the FOOD!!!

During he day folks assimilated as they rode the bus, train and subways to work and back home at work days end.

People worked together, ate lunch together which was delightful when a person of one culture brought food of their heritage for everyone to taste. More, more, more was the cry.

At home, after work, people would eat their foods, listen to their music, tell their stories especially elders to kids who learned about life in the old country from those who were there and gotten out for whatever reason such as fear (sound familiar) survival and opportunity.

Lives were enhanced when people from one culture were invited to a family wedding or other customary ceremony, celebration and observation, of people from a different culture who were given the opportunity to participate, spectate, learn and see how things are done other than they way they do it. Quite an education for most especially for those with an open mind. Of course the great neutralizer was the FOOD as it always is.

Was it squeaky clean. Nope. People are people who like to talk about, actually gossip, about other people. Nothing has changed. Now it is more out in the open. Nobody cares about tact, timelines and temperament. Just say stuff and if offensive to others simply retreat (which means you lost but it will never be admitted) go with the standard, customary and traditional, I’m sorry. Why, yes, you are sorry which is a character reference if nothing else supported by careless, reckless and just plain stupid words that pollute the air.

EXAMPLE: During Military Service one of the country’s I lived in was The Philippines. The workplace was a combination of several of us young GI’s who supported the dozens of local nationals who actually did the majority of work and knew the mission and responsibilities of the unit. Each of us GI”s were assigned a “mentor” who showed us how things were done.

We worked together, learned from each other and ate meals together. Each day at lunchtime one of the mentors brought native and customary foods from his family’s restaurant. Each day was an epicurean’s treat with rice, vegetables and meat blended with local spices creating flavors and tastes all of us Americans had never experienced.

I brought items from the stores on base that were difficult to buy downtown or in towns away from the military base. Things like candy, perfumes and cigarettes were popular with the locals.

We, also, played cards after lunch. One day I was told that Filipino people eat dog. No, not your pet, but more of a “wild dog” species. About four months later while playing cards I was asked how lunch was today. I replied, “great as it is everyday”. I was asked, “what did we eat”. I said,” the usual rice, vegetables and chicken.” He said, “No it was not chicken”. “Okay then pork”., “No”. “Beef”. “No”. “Turkey”. “No”. “Okay, I give up”. He said, “woof-woof-woof”. My first thought was to wash my mouth but that would have been insulting. Besides with a little gravy that accompanied each meal it was hard to determine what was what. We all had a good laugh. I won three dollars that day playing cards. I somehow think the others let me win so that I would feel good about myself. Even way back then feeling good about yourself was valuable and built confidence without having to schedule an appointment with a licensed, educated, certified and credentialed expert whose time slots will be filled beyond capacity as the country deals with the current crisis, which is only the beginning of the crisis in waiting, for the millions who will need their services from kids to elders.

EXAMPLE: TIME needs to filled. One way to fill TIME, yes it includes screen TIME but it can controlled by using 3-4 minutes per segment to educate yourself.

Using your electronic device, gee I sound like a TV game show host, visit the popular and well known website that offers video clips and search for clips that feature music from various cultures around the world. Not only will you listen to exciting, thrilling, captivating, inspirational, and educational music you will see people having fun, perhaps playing an instrument you have not seen before, dressed in traditional cultural clothing, enjoying, no LOVING what they are doing as they share their world spreading joy, pleasure and SMILES.

Flash-mobs area good place to start. From there you will be offered other clips of  similar content but if you are bit imaginative and inquisitive you will find a variety of entertaining and educational EXAMPLES of Race – Culture- Diversity and all the other things I previously mentioned at the beginning of this post.

When you feel inspired to expand your international world search, find and listen to music with emphasis of the pulse, heartbeat and soul of all societies which, of course, is The DRUMS. When the big drum sounds your left foot is coming down. I have my favorite DRUM clips but I do not want to influence your selections. Go explore, research and find your place in this vast space, it’s no disgrace to have a smile on your face, your shoes can be Velcro or lace as you open your mind to others not of your culture, religion and Race.

Mish – Mosh

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of  Common Commentary World where today you will find a “mish-mosh” of items that blend into an incoherent combination of  “stuff”. However, just like my “mish-mosh” soup, there is taste, flavor, spice, texture and substance in the individual and collective ingredients.

And I’m Off, which is true depending on who, or is it whom, you ask!!!

Word on the street is that leaders will be urging schools to open for the upcoming school year.

Where do these leaders send their kids to school? If they lead by example, the hallmark of leadership, they will send their kids to the same schools they, the leaders, are requiring everyone to send their kids such as public, private, charter, religious and all other kind of schools.

This will test the overused and hyped cliché that circulates throughout the country, are we really in this together?

 I was taught and firmly believe that leaders lead by example. Leaders don’t ask others to do things they would not do themselves. Leaders are open, honest, accessible, polite, respectful, available, responsible, trustworthy, reliable, dependable, listen, truthful, have an open mind and provide solutions rather than point fingers and blame others. By the way, when you point your finger at someone you are actually pointing back at yourself. Reasons define success while excuses try to explain failure.

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 e.e. cummings had it right. lets get rid of upper case letters especially when typing on a tablet or lap top. at the same time let’s modify spell check to be less sensitive inserting erroneous words and letters conditioning and brainwashing us to proofread even a one sentence correspondence.

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In six months or so will it be very difficult to get an appointment with any kind of eye doctor based on the increased screen time that work from home folks are doing.

PTSD. The “P” in PTSD means Post when in fact it means “Present”. Appointments for “therapy” will be filled as fast as the eye doctors appointments.

The lines to get to see a professional will be longer than the lines to buy the newest phone.

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Has “just go to the website” replaced the response to a question?

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The same folks, while at a restaurant, who drool when selecting their live lobster for dinner from the tank, run, shriek, hide and scream, for someone to get, when sighted, “that cockroach out of their house and call the exterminator”.

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Nice to see that at the slightest suggestion of re-opening folks are retreating to some old driving habits such as tailgating, speeding, cutting in and out and horn honking while the traffic lights are red impatiently waiting for the green light.

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The most sophisticated, worldly, educated, credentialed, international traveler, epicurean, who speak multiple languages, knows which fork to use, can quote anything from any source and a renaissance person morphs into a kid when given bubble wrap to occupy their time. Perhaps the world could use some bubble wrap. Bubble wrap is fun, entertaining, therapeutic and much more. For the tightly wound constipated folks bubble wrap is somewhat annoying most likely for those void of humor, fun, laughter and play.

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With all the “look at me, look at me” and “thank you for your service” moments I am reminded of what Pop told my brother and I which was: There is no limit to the good one can do as long they are not concerned about receiving credit. It is called “Heart”. You play with talent and win with Heart.

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It takes a lifetime of hard work, dedication, commitment, concern, responsibility, accountability, determination, laughter, compassion, involvement, knowledge, sacrifice, empathy and much more to build a dependable, reliable, trustworthy, trusting and consistent REPUTATION. It takes about five minutes or less to ruin / lose it.

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Time heals all wounds. Time wounds all heels.

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It’s happening now. Time to shift into reverse.

Language is in the septic tanks and where the those Youthful Mutant Aggressive Turtles inhabit. We just don’t care what comes out of our mouths which, of course, is poor role modeling for kids.

The gap between the “have’s” and have not’s is expanding exponentially specifically Economics and Education.

NO TRUST IN LEADERSHIP.

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Where are all the camera folks located for the filming or picture taking of animals, ocean residents and all of natures creations in remote, isolated and somewhat desolate locations around the world?

How long is the wait until the subject is found and doing the things that the photographers / camera folks want to capture as it happens such as the birth of next generation, feeding times, mating rituals, showing colors and fighting for turf?

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Never have I ever (yet):

Here’s two, though there are countless others like stars in the sky or grains of sand at the beach.

What does everyone leave behind when exiting the beach?

Been able to throw a curve-ball in baseball.

Been able to roll a curve right into the “pocket” while bowling.

Been original.

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Find and play the following on YouTube. Listen and learn the words:

Smiling Faces: The Undisputed Truth

War: Edwin Starr

Money Machine: James Taylor

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What does everyone leave behind when exiting the beach?

Wanna wait until my next Blog Post or is an immediate answer necessary.  I know the answer.

I’ll give in: FOOTPRINTS

Mental Health and Overall Well Being *Serious* and somewhat Lengthy!!!

As customary and worth mentioning again there are spelling, grammar and language skills errors of all kinds. Results outweigh methods.

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Universe where today you will find  very little silliness and mostly the Serious by nature of the topic.

It is a topic that is avoided like the multiple pandemics, kept hidden, discreetly or not, and stuffed inside our souls where is does no good and does not belong. It belongs out in the open offering folks faith, hope, time and love.

The economy is not the only thing that is depressed. In time and the economic cycles not related to economics but to emotions and control, the economy will eventually rebound and recover. This is somewhat predictable especially by those certified, educated, credentialed, experienced, licensed, scholarly, published experts who appear on television being it Zoom or SKYPE interviewed in their homes where the bookshelves are filled with books further indicating their credibility though the polls have been proven to be inaccurate.

Mental and Overall Health and Well Being is a delicate, sensitive and personal topic. If it is not now, soon it will be in the forefront of the worlds attention. The “P” in Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) will no longer be refereed to as “Post”. It will morph into “P” for “PRESENT”. The here and now.

Fear is REAL. Uncertainty is told to us everyday all over the screens. Doubt, Worry, Trepidation, Anxiety, Stress, Nervousness, Crying, Frustration, Economics, Tension, Itching, Sleeplessness, Anger combined or individually are the Tsunami of emotions and are REAL as well. There is nothing more REAL than the Human Condition and nothing more challenging than to obtain, retain and maintain control of our lives.

Contributing to the current conditions will be the on-set of the upcoming school year. Do the schools open or not. Who will want to go to a building with 15-20 people in one room circulating throughout the building for 6-7 hours per day? Please note, that July has begun and the advertisements, promotions and marketing for school supplies has not yet arrived. Christmas is easier to sell. This is just pre-school, nursery and grades 1-12. College is in a different arena with similarities. Can kids and adults actually be expected to maintain social distancing, wear face masks all day and NOT:

Sneeze into the air

Sneeze into their hands

Cough into the air

Spit into the trash can

Blow their noses, wipe their hands on their shirts and throw the tissues into the trash can

Touch everything around them without sanitizing their hands

Don’t always use hand sanitizer

Use the bathroom, not sure how many wash their hands

Pick at their noses in an unsanitary way

Usually get close to each other especially when working on a calls group project

SHARE: Supplies: you never know where the supplies have been especially chewed pencils. Food: Can I have a bite? Beverages: Can I have a sip? Taste this, isn’t it good?

Now for the UN”s: Uncertainty, Unknown, Unreliable, Unpredictable, Unnecessary, Unsure, Unclear, Unexpected, Unfortunate, Unprecedented, Unforgettable and the UNIVERSAL Response, used more often than the word ammmmazzzzing, ” I don’t know, We don’t Know, Can’t say, Not sure and other non-committal type responses, not answers which we so desperately need. We are not accustomed to not having answers.

Teachers, staff, parents and kids may not want to go to the school for a variety of reasons all legitimate. How does leadership accommodate and satisfy each unique situation that will arise? Here again, there are no answers, as of the Present, which is the key word here as mentioned before in PTSD, where the “P” means “Present”

Just as there are multiple and plentiful supportive resources available to help with coping, they are only as good as what is put into them. To whom do you put your TRUST. From where will you receive what is needed to maintain your focus, concentration, stability, balance, motivation, inspiration and YOU. Here again, “Don’t know is part of the response but it doesn’t have to be as you will read below.

What follows is my rather extensive narrative about Mental Health and Overall Well being. It accompanied an artwork I developed and the two, when blended, offer a refreshing, motivating and inspiring account of this most sensitive and personal topic. The more the topic is openly discussed, interpreted and acted upon the more success will be experienced by those who, heretofore, perhaps had no idea of the condition, though it affects us all.

SYK (which is”So You Know” instead of FYI). Hey, many things are changing, why not this. My artwork and narrative have been submitted to an international art prize event. The event award has been extended to the first quarter of 2021 but that could change like most everything else. I am confident, not so much about winning though I am a competitive spirit, it would be more of an affirmation of my work. I believe my submission will be the only one with the theme of Mental Health and Well Being.

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“I am Nobody, Who Are YOU?

Are YOU Nobody Too?”

The Pandemic of Pain. YOUR Pain.

Mental Health Pain does not stand alone. It is part of the whole YOU and includes YOUR physical, emotional physiological and spiritual self.

It’s worldwide, global, universal and in your backyard. Everyone is subject to this PAIN. The wise and lucky folks know this for themselves. They have had someone trustworthy tell THEM to seek help whether from a hair dresser, cab driver or friend. Additionally they will tell YOU to seek a certified and experienced professional for YOU.

The first step is the most difficult. In order to get there, first you must leave. It is YOU who will make the determination that yes, I need help. That’s more than half the battle. You’ll be surprised how many are willing to provide, and more significantly, how many are walking in your shoes as you reach out. COLOR.

MOTIVATION: My motivation comes from an experience in high school art class where I was told by the teacher that I was the first student in her 20 years of teaching Art that could not draw a straight line between two points using a ruler. She was a wise woman and set a course and path for me to succeed.  With permission from school officials and my parents, she gave me a small knife and the old fashioned bar of Ivory Soap. My assignment was to create. No instructions, no guidance nor plan to fulfill. Just carve and create; which is what I did. I carved, carved and carved some more. It was akin to “whittling” as the country folks might say. I created dozens of pieces, all unique and all of which were displayed on the classroom window sills. I earned a “B” grade for the class and had the cleanest hands in the school. While my classmates drew, sculpted and painted I carved.

Fifty-five years later I am carving again only this time with a new meaning, purpose and definition. I am doing it as my way of letting you know that I feel your pain at this time in life.

There is a darkness which becomes overwhelming but can be conquered by the LIGHT. Look at, around and eventually through each piece of cleansing soap and you will find that the smallest ray of LIGHT can grow and mature into a new YOU, filled with Hope, Faith and Love, turning all the negatives in YOUR world into success, achievement and victory. There’s a well known song asking you to accentuate the Positive and Eliminate the Negative, allowing you to accomplish more than you ever thought possible.  Free yourself of distractions, of pain and thank God that YOU are Free at Last.

NEGATIVES:

BITING – PIERCING – PENETRATING – GRIPPING – INVASIVE – DEBILITATING – CONSUMING – TORMENTING – HORRIFIC – OMINOUS – FRIGHTENING

They are strong words that go beyond their definition based on our YOUR experiences and feelings. Proportionately the negatives far outweigh and outnumber the positive and healthy ways to manage and control our situations. YOU know this since YOU have applied for scores of jobs, receiving many negative or no responses. This is soon forgotten when the ONE YES response comes YOUR way, which it will, when YOUR attitude is positive, healthy and aware.

YOU need to give yourself TIME to listen YOURSELF. Deep down YOU have the answers and solutions; YOU just need permission and confirmation that YOU are doing what is right and proper for yourself instead of what others are doing. When everyone is turning right, please turn to the left. The fact that you applied to a job shows that you have HOPE.  That YOU believe you can do the job shows that you have FAITH.

The time will soon be upon us when the number of folks struggling with issues brought on and exacerbated by the current global health crisis will far outnumber those who are not in this position, YET.

Soon the world will be aware that everyone is fighting their personal battle with the invisible evil that lurks among us, not in the form of a global virus but in the unique self-condition that invades our personal world, often impeding and preventing OUR growth, progress and eventual success. The darkness will appear to be overwhelming but there is strength to be found in character, determination, awareness and most important, in PREPARATION to offset, and manage the invasion of self-doubt.  Preparation takes TIME – that most precious of gifts. YOU have the power to succeed through and past struggles, overcoming obstacles and conquering concerns given HOPE, FAITH and LOVE.

YOU are EMPOWERED by preparing YOURSELF to enjoy the journey to YOUR success.

There is LIGHT in the form of opportunity and accomplishment. It will take WORK – focused, centered and concentrated on YOU. And YOU will need COLOR from support, assistance, guidance, inspiration and direction since YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE!!!

YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  Loneliness is everything it is cracked up to be to.

PROOF: A One Person Show is never only one person.  It is singers, dancers, musicians, bus drivers, roadies, publicists, marketing, agents, promotions, lighting, staging, carpenters, food service, medical staff, coordinators, lawyers, accountants, administrators and scores of other professionals working in harmony, with their own personal and career issues, that makes the One Person Show happen.

The LIGHT and COLOR are always there, visible and illuminated. Both must be seen and made known to YOU that it, the LIGHT and COLOR, are in fact attainable, available and AT THE READY to welcome YOU when the time is right.

Admitting to YOURSELF that you need HELP opens the way and leads YOU to your goals. Having HOPE, FAITH, and TIME on your side provides the vehicle to power your energy.

The greatest gift YOU can give YOURSELF is TIME.

TIME to Understand YOU.

TIME to THINK.

TIME to PREPARE.

TIME to PLAN.

TIME to PERFORM.

TIME to HEAL.

TIME to GIVE to OTHERS.

TIME to GIVE YOURSELF TIME.

TIME LEADS to SUCCESS.

TIME to PLANT SEEDS.

TIME to TAKE ROOT and GROW.

TIME to CULTIVATE YOUR OWN GARDEN

TIME to ENJOY LIFE ON YOUR TERMS.

TIME IS YOUR FRIEND.

TIME to TRUST, RESPECT and LOVE YOU

This is NOT about me, this is about and for YOU!!!

There is Color and Light. It is there. Find YOURS.

Reference and Tribute to Emily Dickinson, Voltaire and Martin Luther King, Jr.

Leadership, Is It? + Stuff to Think About

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Place where you can learn, laugh, think, ponder and wonder, where does he get this stuff? Truth: Much of it arrives late at night when I scramble to find pen and paper because I will never remember any of the late night / over night thoughts.

My goal is just to make your day a teenie bit better.

I was taught and firmly believe that leaders lead by example. Leaders don’t ask others to do things they would not do themselves. Leaders are open, honest, accessible, polite, respectful, available, accountable, responsible, responsive, communicators, trustworthy, reliable, dependable, listeners, truthful, have an open mind and provide solutions rather than point fingers and blame others. By the way, when you point your finger at someone you are actually pointing three fingers back at yourself. Reasons define success while excuses try to explain failure which is what excuses do, they fail.

EXAMPLE: Does a baseball manager / coach ask a home run hitter “swing for the fences” type player to “bunt” which is more than likely a skill not well practiced for by the big hitters. Most certainly, when asked to do so the big swing type hitter will not be successful in the attempt to bunt thereby sacrificing his turn at bat, literally taking the bat out of his hands and most significantly causing the player to think about what was asked of him when he may be thinking “just one swing, I’ll hit it out of sight”. What an experienced manager / coach, who knows his players, will do is “pinch-hit” for the big swing hitter and have a skilled, experienced  and efficient bat control hitter who has proven over time he can “bunt”. Sacrifice: Key part of Leadership.

Assets of a Leader include, but are not limited to, their knowledge of people, the ability to recognize strengths and weaknesses, the ability to make those around the Leader better than they were before in terms of their Leadership, performance and their ability to surround themselves with trustworthy, flexible, personable, knowledgeable and skilled staff to whom a Leader will listen, comprehend, understand and act on their professional expertise, advice and suggestions instead of dismissing those qualities and the people who offered them.

Leaders create a warm, welcoming, inviting, pleasant, productive, structured, disciplined, respectful, rewarding, opportunistic workplace environment void of the pandemic type toxins, poison and venom found in places with high turnover, higher anxiety, FEAR, stress, frustration, threatening, intimidation and retaliation.

Laws of Leadership: (Mentioned in a previous Blog but worth repeating here).

*Mentored

*Appreciated

*Challenged

*Promoted

*Involved

*Respected

*Valued

*Trusted

*Empowered

*On a Mission with Purpose

*Paid Well

The Leader / manager / coach knows his players. Their likes. Their dislikes. Their skills. Their character. Their preferences, professionally speaking. Their ego. Their tolerances. Their comfort zone. Their Leadership.

EXAMPLE: Who or what is in the LEAD here.

After many unsuccessful attempts to become “on the family way”, you seek and get advice from medical professionals who have been down this road many times before.

Here’s the plan.

Female: Regularly checks her biological indicators to determine the “right time”.

Female: calls Male and says, “we have a two hour opportunity beginning in one hour. Please come home”

Male: Either it is “I’m on my way” which is the same response the Power Rangers gave when the were called, on their communicators, to get to the scene NOW. Because of this we now have immediate response and gratification on steroids. Microwaves, next day delivery, same day delivery, etc. OR the Male says “I can’t get away from my current responsibilities”. Sorry, let’s try next month.

FEMALE: I am YOUR responsibility. Frustrated, FEMALE returns to her responsibilities after a good cry or maybe not so good but at least she let it out not like Males who hold feelings and emotions inside their suppressed soul unless, of course, they are requested (actually commanded) to show their baby making skills. In any other situation for pollination the Male is seemingly always at the ready.

This scene or similar scenario may go on for a few months when finally:

FEMALE: GET HOME NOW!!!

MALE: Oh my GOD. I have to get home. Beginning right now the Male Mind thinks, “How am I going to do this”? “Yeah, I can get home but how am I going to perform”.  All those fabricated and embellished MALE tales of conquests are of no use here. This is game on, showtime, Prepare, Produce, Perform time. You got game?

The mind is the most powerful organ. It controls everything including causing performance impediments due to lack of morphing Herm the One Eyed Worm a small, shrunken, hiding, reclusive bald headed critter into a vehicle that can drive home the delivery.

FEMALE: Good Your Home. Let’s Go

MALE: Oh the pressure. It’s not working. Can’t rise to the occasion let alone gain comfortable entry to close the deal. A variety of stimulus enhancements don’t work. What the body wants and needs in the next hour or so the mind will not permit until finally enough of a push is obtained through the miracle of nature. Imagine that completing the mission with a less than complete tool of a one tool box, yet the end result was enough to seal the deal. Only ONE is needed.

FEMALE Okay, you can go now. I’ll just lay here with my legs up so noting escapes the entry. We can cuddle tonight or wait for the results come in. (no pun intended with these two words).

Now the wait begins. If the target was hit we won’t have to go through this ordeal again, until the next time we want to build our family. Best of all we can resume our passionate pleasures (which ill ebb and flow) but not for long. Nine months is can seem forever until that wonderful time when your cultivated garden, that has taken root has grown into  your next generation.

MALES: Be in the delivery room. Cut the cord if asked and allowed by the hospital. Change diapers willingly. The reward is the bond you form with your kid and the smiles on their faces when the are “cleaned”. You’ll never know the differences in the four types of bay cries (feed me, hold me, change my diaper, put me in my crib for a nap) so listen when asked to respond. You can watch the game on demand. Do the laundry, clean the toilets, offer “space” for shopping (not groceries but personal indulgences to feel good about yourself shopping), lunch with Mom, talks with friends, HAIR and NAILS, time together often just looking at your kids. Make time for yourself: your guys, playing some ball, watching your teams, showering everyday!!!

A simple, beautiful, loving gesture on both parts, reduced by time restrictions and performance obstacles mostly caused by our brain the LEADER

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Are Eminem, aka Marshall Bruce Mathers and “The Beaver”, aka  Jerry Mathers somehow related?

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Which do you use:

Thanks

Thanks a Lot

Thanks a Whole Lot

Thanks a Bunch

Thank You Very Much

Thanks, but no Thanks.

Thank You, No

Thanks So Much

Thank You So Much

Thank You Soooooooooooooooooo Much

TY

Hey, thanks for reading this part.

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It’s nice to be important but more important to be nice.

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Smart Phones

Smart Homes

Smart Televisions

Smart Cars

Smart most any and everything.

SMART CUPS?

How does the same cup know how to keep cold drinks cold and hot drinks hot?

If so many things are Smart and getting Smarter why are we so stupid? Nothing personal. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings and I apologize if I did.

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When is it time and how is it scientifically calculated for medicine to be released if taken in one pill, capsule or gel cap?

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The only way to be creative is to invent language. The “Smart” thing we can do is use language to clearly communicate our messages not be heard as much as to be understood.

Throw Mud Against a Wall, Some Will Stick

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary World intended for you to raise awareness, elevate critical thinking and perhaps, just perhaps, cause a smile, laugh or chuckle to come your way with ABSOLUTELY NO INTENTION of Hurting Anyone’s Feelings.

SYN, which means So You Know rather than FYI, my Blog Posts contain errors of all kinds. My brain moves faster than my fingers and one can only do so much editing for accuracy. In the past I would offer apologizes. For here and now pleases accept me as Popeye said, “I am what I am and that’s all that I am”.

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Is the word pronounced Gala or Gayla. Perhaps an event planner can provide definition. Tomato – ToMAHto, Potatoe- PoTAHtoe!!!

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Who said these? Perhaps, someone you know. Certainly not me. To be creative language must first be invented. Things said and written today were made known in the past. It’s called History which, if more of us were aware, there would not be the constant repeating of History’s mistakes, However, we keep doing the same things expecting different results. What’s that called. I am sure you know.

It’s not who you know, but who knows you.

In order to get there, first you have to leave.

I’m so slow I have to speed up to stop.

I never remember anything I forget and I never forget any thing I remember.

It is not good to eat or drink on an empty stomach.

I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.

What we do good nobody remembers what we do bad nobody forgets.

The difficult takes some time, while the impossible takes a little longer.

Everything is great and wonderful, until it is not.

Everyone is great and wonderful, until they are not.

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I don’t know what all the fuss is about Social Distancing. I have had Social Distancing as part of my everyday life since my youth. Folks naturally stay back, away or avoid my presence. Perhaps, I offend their olfactory’s, appall by appearance or disgust by design. Who knows but  being aware of the three former “distances” could help folks understand the need to be more diligent with their distancing. It is not a new phenomena. We have been doing it “for-ev as described below:

Social Space: Three feet or so apart. Close but not too close. You may have just been introduced to someone and want to keep apart, folding your arms, clutching your belongings and not making much eye contact.

Personal Space: Three feet and closer depending on your comfort level, trust, confidence and knowledge of the person.

Intimate Space: Reserved for those in your world you can reach out and hug, embrace, kiss, perform any of the multiple hand contacts such as Old Fashioned Handshake, Modern Day Handshake using all kinds of creative, unique movements, High Five, Tap, Dap, Pound, Fist Pump, Finger-Interlocking Maneuvers, Chest Pump and other forms of human contact upon which you and your Intimate Space “friends” agree.

Perhaps you have been made to feel uncomfortable or you made someone feel uncomfortable by using a “space” you thought was acceptable when it was not. Don’t feel rejected. Learn about the people in your life and what works with each one. Knowing a little about Body Language can remove awkwardness. Where are all the Body Language experts today when need the most to tells us about and interpret the Body Language (non-verbal communication for those from the 60’s) of those in positions of power, influence and leadership? They may expose Truth. Cant’ have that now or can we?

Suppose you are attending a lecture, seminar or group instruction (classroom setting). The facilitator walks around the room lecturing and is getting closer to you. You don’t know each other outside the room and you may feel awkward, anxious and uncomfortable as the facilitator gets closer to your “space”. It is more than likely not intentional on the part of the facilitator who may be releasing nervous energy walking around the room unaware of how their behavior could be perceived or interpreted. There are those, most certainly if you follow the “news”, who do things like this deliberately because they actually believe their position gives them leverage and permission to act and behave inappropriately, that will cause your defense to be heightened. These types are bully’s and will eventually “mis-step” in their own minute world exposing their true selves and be escorted from the field.

Put yourself in a library setting, alone at the head of the table studying, reading or checking your phone. A stranger comes to the table. Your first thought is, “I hope they don’t sit next to me”. Perhaps they will sit at the other end of the table at the other head of the table seat. When they do, you focus on your work to avoid eye contact.

If a person comes to your table and you know each other you two can sit adjacent to each other on the diagonal or opt to sit part to maintain focus on your work rather than be tempted by distractions.

There are many more choices here. Things like seating available, location of the available seating, gender, time of day and familiarity. I have provided a start which you can further pursue or not.

Watch people behave in public places such at bus stops, train stations and waiting in line three days, in 90 degree temperatures with no Port-A-Potty available, for concert tickets, the newest Phone or 80% off at the big box stores. All kinds of stuff happening here. Observe. Think. Learn.

When I came from Military Service I flew in the “red-eye” airplane, took a taxi, subway and bus to my destination. In the airplane everyone slept or read. In the taxi, the driver silently drove to my requested destination. In the subway and bus all the passengers covered their faces with their newspapers to avoid contact of any kind especially a Military Veteran coming home in 1973. I maintained my standing space carrying my duffle bag, overnight bag, garment bag and medium size suit case that was a bit wounded from the international return flight home to The USA. No regrets.

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What is the Caucasian Obsession of basting at the beach, tanning indoors and outdoors, applying creams, salves, ointments and spray products to their skin so they can get darker?

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Changes are happening everyday all day. Social, Personal, Work, Play, Racial, Entertainment, Educational, Business, Dining Out, Shopping and whatever else is a “victim” of modern times.

Perhaps science can cure, heal and provide relief.

Perhaps science can also develop “Seedless Cherries”. Science has given us Seedless, Grapes, Seedless Watermelon, Apples that won’t turn brown after you take a bite, leave it on the counter and come back later to finish eating your apple and scores of other food altering products. If it comes from Nature it is usually good for us but not everything. Be careful when hiking. Learn to recognize poison ivy. Although Nature has provided goats that have been used to eat poison ivy, without the same affect poison ivy has on humans,  in public places where folks once gathered and hopefully soon be able to return to parks and playgrounds to enjoy Natures greatness. Don’t mess with Nature, nature wins all the time, eventually.

Proof: Go the ocean with a broom. Try to sweep away an ocean wave. Better yet, read Maggie, Millie, Molly and May by e. e. cummings. It will make you feel good about yourself, being a kid, having fun, playing and energizing your spirit and soul. Also, “being” at the beach is the best form of “Exfoliation”. No need to buy all the expensive skin care products. Just go some form of beach, bathe in the breeze, play in the sand, swim in the water and let Nature Exfoliate.

Cherry Pits can be the PITS especially for us older folks whose teeth are a bit more brittle and susceptible to chipping, cracking and breaking.

By the way, what does everyone leave behind when exiting the beach or any sandy area? Yes, I know garbage, trash, soiled diapers, etc. But that’s not everyone. We all leave our footprints behind!!! Ha-Ha. Maybe here is where you chuckle or shake your head in disbelief or disgust.

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Why is it soooooooooooo difficult, cumbersome, corrupt, scandalous, and challenging to VOTE. Is this not yet another example of “You can’t win, unless you cheat” to be added to education, business, politics, sports?

If “States Rights” of using their own Voting Methods and systems is not efficient  why not change the process to a National Voting operation so all the states can use the same voting machines and processes to accomplish the goal and reduce, lessen and maybe even eliminate fraud, cheating, scandal, costly and time consuming investigations that produce little if anything except jobs and work for a select few, bribery and all the tactics used to suppress citizens votes even though mass marketing and advertising encourages folks to register, turn out and vote even in the rain which shrinks the voting numbers.

Is WAM (walking around money still used?) Will “polling places” continues to be closed conveniently on election day? Will the deceased still Vote?

As mentioned above changes are happening all around us. Why not change the way Votes are cast and counted. One Vote. One System. Success. Change is good. Do a little research and you will find a well known former leader of our country was against the legalization of marijuana about 10 years ago. Now he sits on the Board of Directors of a huge marijuana company. If he can change so can everything else. Only we, more than likely, will not financially benefit from our changes but we will sleep good.

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When someone says to you, “let me honest (or perfectly honest)” with you, please be aware that this can interpreted as everything they told you prior to their “honest proclamation” is not quite true.

And be careful how you dole out forgiveness since that can be interpreted as you giving them permission to do it again.

I many cases, kindness can mistaken for weakness which as you hopefully know from reading through my Blog, is the Modus Operandi” of the bully.

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Have you ever seen a school, amateur and professional athlete NOT complain or argue with the authority who has called a foul or other form of infraction of said athlete. Nobody ever does or did anything wrong. Nobody breaks the rules, Granted the authorizes sometimes get things wrong but technology has proved them correct most of the time.

The negative reactions to authority decisions of, foul or no foul, influences the behavior and attitudes of young athletes who model, idolize and worship their hero athletes.

Hey kids, your family who supports, you, feeds you, teaches, you, provides you, fills out all the forms, sacrifices for you, drives you, washes your uniforms and all your clothes, coordinates all you “activities”, enables you rather than empowers you in most cases, tells you “Good Job” all the time even when it is not true, pays for your phone and internet, waits up for you late at night, leaves a light on for you and worry’s about you all the time, those are your heroes. An athlete or anyone else about whom you know nothing except their team , position and uniform number is not your hero. You can aspire to their achievements even exceeding their results but until and unless you know them as a person stick with those who love you, unconditionally. How do they teat people? What do they give back to the communities? What is their family life like? You can tell what kind of a person is by the way the act, behave and function on the field of play. Beyond that, there is little you can know unless you have personal contact and connections to you hero.

TIDBIT of USELESS INFORMATION: Lastly about this, a hero like a sub, hoagie, Cuban, grinder, torpedo, zeppelin and poor boy is a sandwich with its origins in sandwich shops many years ago when the Mom and Pop store owner used the “ends” of deli meats and cheesees added lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, pickles, onions, oregano, mayo and put it together on a long roll creating the sandwich which has grown to six feet in length.

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Have any disappointments?

Here’s mine.

While engaged in conversation with a person of “Personal Space’ status, we approach the dessert table carefully eyeing the goodies.

Without losing focus, concentration and spatial contact with each other I reach for the tray of what I am most certain are Chocolate Chip Cookies.

Taking a cookie without directly looking at the selection I raise it to my mouth, take a bite and think to myself: Oatmeal Raisin which is confirmed upon ocular examination.

Triple Header Day

In keeping with current societal norms, ritual and cliché: First, I want to thank you for taking your time to read my Manure. Second: There are errors, mostly language use errors, throughout my writings. For this I apologize not seeking forgiveness since when forgiveness is given it often gives permission to do it again. Third, I appreciate your understanding, patience and consideration.

FIRST: FOOD: Even More Powerful Than We Think.

The following may be considered an oversimplification, however SIMPLE works best. I know this because most folks like the SIMPLE things in life which is why they get along with me.

WOW!!!

My most recent Post is about TIME and it certainly has been too long a TIME since then.

With multiple PANDEMICS my focus, concentration, energy and purpose have been delayed much like everything else around the world.

PANDEMIC SOLUTION: Have you ever watched the television show on The Food Network: Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives? Perhaps you have and if not then perhaps you should watch at least five episodes because Guy Fieri GETS IT. He and / or the people he surrounds himself with GET IT. My gut is it is he, Guy Fieri, who GETS IT based on his history, success and longevity doing the difficult task of pleasing peoples pallets.

What exactly should you be looking for when you watch Diners Drive-ins and Dives. guess what NOT the FOOD, yet. First, make a list if you are so inclined, and write down the RACE AND CULTURAL DIVERSITY of Triple D as the show is often affectionately referred.

Notice from where the chefs originate, skin color, languages, gender, size, clothing, menus items and so forth. Look a little closer and write, in your notes, that the folks about whom I am referring are from all over the world, settling in The USA and making a huge difference in our lives by, many times, bringing the FOODS of their lands.

That’s it. The secret is not an individual ingredient but the finished PRODUCT. Feel the texture. Inhale the scents. Taste the flavors, perhaps heretofore, never experienced. Meet the CHEF, in many cases, the owner. Note the ambiance, usually small neighborhood type restaurants where folks gather to eat while they enhance, enrich and empower their own lives from the ambiance, colors, decorations, music and the common ground of delicious, tasty, gratifying FOODS that are, perhaps, often attempted  at home but never so well expressed as in the company of the creator.

Your overall healthy and well being are enriched by indulging and consuming FOODS unique unto themselves as are the people in front of and behind the scenes.

Are you waiting for my point and purpose? Here goes. Be patient and keep an open mind.

FOOD is not only the ANSWER. FOOD WILL become THE SOLUTION!!!

FOOD: The Great Neutralizer.

People travel to experience the sights, sounds, smells, music, culture, art, museums, landscape, history, language, history, folklore, traditions, customs, observations but what does the traveler remember the most, the one thing that is universal in travel, the topic of their many discussions when asked, “So how as the trip”. ITS THE FOOD!!! IT’S THE FOOD, man!!! Each time you speak about it, THE FOOD, you taste it. IT’S THE FOOD!!! As with most stories it gets better with TIME. You look for THE FOOD at home but can’t find THE FOOD which is why you need to watch Guy Fieri’s Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. Eventually you will find YOUR FOOD.

Safe to say, you have traveled somewhere, domestically, and discovered a whole new world of flavors and tastes. Maybe you grew-up eating Hoagies. As you traveled and grew as a person you found, accepted and ate: Subs, Zeppelins, Poor Boys, Cubans. Torpedoes, Grinders all basically the same meal but with a different twist depending on geographic location and chef. When you travel outside of your own zone, even it is just a different part of town, you give yourself the chance to learn, grow and prosper.

Every time a protest is organized, or not, have the local restaurants whose names are not known all over the globe, but the local merchants who live and work in the community prepare their specialties. To be FREE to the protesters the FOOD will be FREE to the professionals who prepare the meals. TIME is their gift and investment. Since many things are given for FREE when needed then, here too, the required provisions for the experts to make their meals is to be FREE as well. The money can be found if the right people look and make it happen for the good of the neighbors, locals, shop-keepers, as well as, for the overall safety, healthy, security and well being of one community and one neighborhood at a time.

Have those folks prepare the magic meals and offer, for FREE, an open invitation to partake in the goodies. On a full belly, tasting and experiencing delicacies, unbeknownst to the attendees, behavior, understanding, compassion, anger, frustration, stress, energy and healing just may be directed towards the positive rather than the opposite results we have seen. Invest in the people and the dividends will follow.

Many have experienced the above such as when they go to a neighbor’s, relatives, co-workers, social event where FOODS are offered and eaten that raise awareness, spark conversation and have folks wanting more of the same.

Think about the times, hopefully, you were invited as a guest to a wedding, religious ceremony and other like kind situation where you may not have been aware of the cultural, religious and ethnic rituals that await. You may feel like an outsider but a little  research can ease your comfort level and by consuming the “goodies” that await make you a richer person which you can someday reciprocate.

The Pandemics can be managed, controlled and overcome when you believe, understand and respect that:

The difficult takes some time, while the impossible takes a little longer.

Time for lunch and, also, what to defrost for dinner.

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SECOND: Communications: Clear, Heard and Understood? Needs Work.

I don’t get it.

Who’s LISTENING?

With all the communication experts, authors, lecturers, commentators, professors and leaders why is there STILL an overwhelming abundance of miscommunications.

A young man, Eminem, wiser than his years, and certainly wiser and more informed than me and maybe you as well, upon his emergence as a spokesperson, influencer and poet wrote:

“Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they have something to say but nothing comes out when they move their lips just but a bunch of gibberish and the MF’ers act like they forgot about Dre.”

Another example comes from the Legendary Comedian Rudy Ray Moore:

“I see your lips quiver unk but I don’t hear a *********ing word your saying.

One More from Harry Nilsson, Midnight Cowboy movie

“Everybody’s taking at me but I don’t hear a word their saying only the echoes of my mind”.

Most certainly there are more EXAMPLES (by the way EXAMPLES are the best Explanations which is from a previous Post somewhere below this Post) but hopefully I have Communicated my message clearly, precisely and succinctly.

You Cannot NOT Communicate whether you know this or NOT.

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THIRD: Safety First, maybe NOT in this case.

With all the attention given to safety and security, especially when it comes to our kids, why is it that when driving around several neighborhoods I have seen Pictures with First and Last Names printed on a sign, placed on the front lawn indicating this home is where a graduating student lives.

Schools have locked doors, police on site, sign-in sign our registers, name tag badges with pictures, cameras, teachers on “hall duty”, outdoor supervision during play time, bus loading and off loading staff, fingerprinting, drug screen testing, background checks, work history reference checks and probably many more filters to be filtered all for protection and hopefully to find the “bad guys” before they become part of the school community.

Parents are told not to have their kids names appear on backpacks, gym bags and outerwear. Nothing is to be visible that can identify a kid yet there they are. Pictures with names on the front lawns of where the kids live.

Too frightening to mention, though we all know it is out there on social (actually “a social”) media filled with pictures, names and schools of the ones whose information should not be so public.

Limit your pictures to your pets dressed in costume, your lunch meal, snakes in your yard, flowers, find the “A” puzzles, proms from the 1960’s, old stuff, aka, antiques /  vintage and which of the six candy bars or sodas you prefer, etc. etc. etc.

Learn from the past. Live in the present. Prepare for the FUTURE.

 TIME!!!

***Among other things I am flawed so be patient and understanding rather than critical when you come upon mistakes in my writing**.

Here’s a good way to begin your day and more importantly your weekend.

It’s about TIME which, according to the Chambers Brothers, has come today.

Read along with my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary of Manure that follows. Take / Make some TIME to read about TIME. It won’t take a long TIME only about the same amount of TIME used to locate saved files, e-mails and documents that are suppose to save us TIME.

TIME: I don’t have the TIME. I can’t afford the TIME. TIME, like land, is a wasting asset.

I wish I had more TIME. you’ll appreciate and understand this as you progress in life.

I don’t know many, if any, who would say. “Ya know I wish I had spent more TIME at work”.

If you think one second of TIME has no power, impact and influence and cannot make a difference in your life then please watch the video of Iron Bowl Football Game of November 30, 2013 between Auburn and Alabama. In one second history was created, lives were alerted for both teams and the money folks who thought they had cash in hand were now reduced to a lost payoff.

TIME: Hey you gotta, a sec?

TIME: Yo, you got a minute?

TIME: Listen, this will only take a minute or two.

It is similar to when someone tells you:

Let me be honest with you which implies that everything previously uttered is subject to not being true. The warning signal and check language light should illuminate in your cranium. Same for TIME.

TIME: We just don’t have any. But how come? We have all the gadgets, excuse me DEVISES that save time such as electronics, calendars, planners, schedules, recipes, procedures, scripts, smart phones, smart cars, smart houses (not homes), smart appliances, smart furniture, smart watches and just about anything can be made to help us Get Smart who is actually Agent 86. All this Smart TIME Saving Stuff used by many, especially me, who are less than Smart.

With all the Smart Stuff at our disposal, about which we only use, at the most, 10% of the collective capabilities, we revert to doing something which has become lost in our society. We ask someone, a human, for help even though that human will refer to a smart device to solve our issue, claiming “see it’s easy”.

TIME: Make TIME your friend (from a previous post somewhere on my Blog) and you WIN which is a good thing. Please don’t deny yourself the pleasure, joy and comfort of WINNING. It’s a good thing that will EMPOWER you to feel good about yourself, if you so choose to experience those feelings.

ADVERTISING – MARKETING  – PROMOTIONS

TIME brings change. I see that in my loss of and graying of my hair.

There was TIME when subliminal messages flashed across the movie theater screen resulting in most of the audience getting up, walking / stumbling in the dark, opening the exit / entrance door flashing light into the dark movie theater, so we could buy more popcorn, soda, food and candy. oh those Goobers!!! Brainwashing 101. George has his Brain Droppings which are much more entertaining, enlightening and educational than my meager attempts to be and show intelligence and awareness.

The way to sell. Create a product: Cigarettes. Place attractive ladies dressed appropriately yet inviting. Give the ladies a container loaded with four pack samples of cigarettes with an attached belt which goes around the neck and shoulders to support the container freeing her arms to distribute, unlimited, those four pack samples of cigarettes. Place her on street corners on the big cites during rush hours in the morning and evening when folks are scurrying to work and on their way home. By the way the same cigarette containers were used by ice cream vendors on the beaches during the summer months when people are there. TIME or is it TIMING. 

She works for a few weeks doing this. Then she is nowhere to be found sought out not for her, but by those who have become accustomed to free stuff and more significantly “hooked”, “dependent” uh oh and oh no, “addicted” on whatever is in cigarettes which back then was tobacco, unlike modern times, where the Periodic Table from science class can identify the ingredients. TIME in this case and most cases is MONEY. In TIME, we’re gonna getcha ya’s one way or the other similar to Blondie’s (not Dagwood Bumstead’s wife for you old timers) lyrics.

Who loves free stuff. All of us. Go to your mailbox and see what comes your way in the form of Samples and Coupons starting with, around the same TIME as the cigarette give-a-ways, the mailman (this is well before the generic term Postal Worker was in introduced along with all the other neutral terms and phrases in our present day lexicon) delivered our bills, bank statements and samples of cereal, toothpaste, shampoo, detergent and most of the consumer products avaible at the grocery store. Try it. You’ll like it. Just ask the cereal kid Mikey. Car dealers let us “Test Drive” to sample the cars capabilities and features. People live together to sample the goods and to see how long it takes before they can’t stand to be together. Those who make it together have a 50-50 chance of success and longevity.

Every town has a house or building that has been for sale FOREVER. However, in TIME, eventually, everything sells.

TIME will tell Grannies, Moms and Teachers often said, usually ad nauseum.

Now it is TIME get back to work and focus on making the most, highest and best use of the precious TIME we have to do what we do best and a little bit more. Tonight we can Binge Watch our favorite shows as we say “I just don’t have the TIME to workout, go shopping (yeah delivery services, boo all the extra, extra extra (like paperboys once said) charges, call my Mother, hand write a Thank You letter to those who gave me a present, volunteer anywhere or do something good for someone which is actually, not selfishly doing something good for ourselves, so say the experts.

TIME to close.

Race: Rudy Ray Moore. Who? Read On.

Time for a dive into my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary World of Manure

Welcome to yet another in an irregular schedule of Manure Samples intended to inform, enlighten, entertain, educate, empower and make you THINK, LAUGH and SMILE.

This post is about Race (not the track and field kind of race but Race with a capital “R” which circulates and permeates throughout our world mostly in a destructive unhealthy way which can be FIXED even CURED if only folks would listen and have and keep an open mind). I have provided a previous post on Race, which I invite you read or re-read, and want to enhance my position on the issue by proving an EXAMPLE.

Off to the Race or is it races. You make the call since I at the Post. And I’m off!!!

Rudy Ray Moore

This is my true story which occurred in the mid 1970’s. This one is about my meeting the Legendary Comedian Rudy Ray Moore. I just watched Eddie Murphy play Rudy Ray Moore as Dolemite and was thrilled to re-live memories from decades past.

After Military Service, and throughout college at Temple University in North Philadelphia, which was the same Philly neighborhood where my Dad, his parents and brothers grew-up and lived, I worked for a flooring contractor who was a skilled craftsman but needed the boost I provided to build his business mostly focusing on customer service.

I knew some local folks and during conversations I mentioned the business. Several asked if we would work in their North Philly neighborhood. I asked, “aren’t there some local contractors”? I was told no. They don’t live and work in this neighborhood. And they certainly don’t want to come “down here”. I developed relationships and within a month or so we were in North Philly every week doing 1-3 flooring jobs. One customer gave us a “tip” which was a cassette recording of Rudy Ray Moore’s comedy.

We listened to the cassette of Dolemite everyday for months. We recited each “bit” as we drove from job to job. One day while eating lunch I read in the newspaper that Rudy Ray Moore was coming to Philly for the premier of his Dolemite Movie.

We looked at each other and said”We’re going”!!!

We had two weeks until the premier so we went about our business carefully scheduling work that would not interfere with our going to see Rudy as Dolemite in the movie.

Finally it was show day and time. We finished worked early enough to get home, shower, change, eat and get to the movie theater in Downtown Philly around 6PM. The movie was scheduled to start at 8:00 PM.

We were the first to arrive. The ticket office was not open. By 6:30 PM the crowds began to arrive all standing around in front of the theater waiting for Rudy’s arrival.

We stood in our spot to be first in line to buy movie tickets. The crowds pinched towards the curb when the big white stretch limo arrived inching its way to the front of the theater. The limo stopped and didn’t move for an eternal few minutes. That is when the passenger side front door opened and out came one of Rudy’s crew. He went to the rear of the limo and opened the curbside door where Rudy’s posse, ladies and the man himself, Rudy Ray Moore, emerged all dressed to the nines with Rudy wearing a white suit, white fur coat, wide rim brim and feathered boa.

The crowd went wild cheering, screaming Rudy’s name and making room for Rudy and crew to move towards the theater entrance. We were still in our spot. As he got closer Rudy’s eyes and my eyes met. He had a look of doubt on his smiling face. He came right to me and my my boss, looked around and said, “what are you two doing here”. Without hesitation we replied, “Rudy we love you. We listen to you everyday and recite along with you”. And with that we began to recite:, “The twelfth of May was one hell of a day……………… Rudy smiled with delight and said, “you two come with me”. Rudy escorted us into the theater saying, “you two are my guests I got this for you” meaning we did not pay for our seats. Rudy went to the middle of the center section of the movie theater, looked around, told his crew to sit and relax but to leave two seats next to Rudy for his two light skinned fans.

Rudy sat down. An elderly lady sitting right behind Rudy asked Rudy if was going to wear his Brim throughout the movie. Rudy replied. “No ma’am. Momma raised me be better than that”. The lady thanked Rudy, praised his Mom for raising a fine son and replied “I know she did” with a Huh-Um for emphasis.

We all loved the movie. People applauded at the end. Rudy stood, smiled and waved at everybody.

Out on the street the crowd stayed seeking one last glimpse, maybe a picture or autograph from Rudy. He was most accommodating and obliged everyone who came his way. We did not have a camera only wonderful, unique to us, memories we shared everyday for years after our meeting the Great Rudy Ray Moore, comedian, actor, entertainer and gentleman.

Eddie Murphy was spectacular in his role of Rudy Ray Moore but it wasn’t until the end of the movie when the man himself, Rudy Ray Moore, appeared which for me, and those who knew or met Rudy, was a time to, once again, be part of a time when laughter, humor and silliness were included and welcomed in our society and culture.

I ask everyone to watch the Eddie Murphy movie about Dolemite and Rudy Ray Moore the man who brought Dolemite for us to enjoy, learn and grow.

Eddie, in his way, brought Rudy to Life and Rudy, in his way, gave us Dolemite, a character to admire, respect and see in ourselves much like any created character that speaks to us all.

Fast froward to the 1990’s. I worked for a small business owner who first asked if I would work in inner city urban communities. I said, of course, why wouldn’t I? He told me some of his staff won’t go “down there”. I said, “I will” and that sealed the deal. Several of my first assignments were “down there”. The word spread among the locals. Within a month I was “down there” every week providing my services, making money and earning TIPS. By the way, the word TIPS is an acronym which means “To Insure Proper Service”. The better the service the better the TIP. I think I received TIPS not only because I was good at what I was doing but more significantly I arrived on time, went the extra mile and came to their “down there” neighborhood. Incidentally, all the work I did “down there” came from referrals which we all know is the best form of advertising and is very cost effective as well.

SYK (So You Know instead of FYI), “Down There” are neighborhoods most folks avoid unless they are on a specific mission and neighborhoods that are featured on the nightly news especially when life struggles are in the forefront. That is keeping it real!!!

Have and Keep an Open Mind.

You Try It!!!

Welcome to my Limited by the Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Universe.

I am most certain there are spelling and grammar mistakes but life is not perfect since perfect does not exist. This is probably the least of my imperfections.

I have been unable to post a blog due to technical issues resolved by the fine folks at Word Press. I must have clicked too many of the wrong buttons to mess up a fine running system. The Word Press folks must be scratching their collective heads in utter fear whenever they receive an e-mail for help from me.

You ‘Bout Ready? I am. So here goes.

Remember Mikey not Mickey but Mikey who “likes it” from the cereal commercial way back?

Time for you to try it.

Try what?

Walk in the shoes of a teacher. Better yet, sit in on a class and watch performance art in motion and action controlling and managing not only the academics but the behavior, questions, personalities, parents, state and local inspectors, supervisors, superintendents, principals, administrators, official observers and everyone else stepping in the business of a teacher.

The performance art only lasts about 45-55 minutes not a long time unless, of course, you are the one on center stage, 5-7 times per day everyday, circulating throughout the classroom monitoring, assisting, questioning and responding to every need imaginable and then some more that appear.

In college, again way back, we were told that for every hour class is in session it will require three hours of out of class studying, researching, reading, writing and preparing for whatever is on the syllabus.

Ask any teacher how much time they spend preparing just one lesson for one class. Before school, after school, during school, nights, shopping, spending their own money not reimbursed, weekends and most all other “free time ” a teacher has is spent on gathering and preparing for the next several weeks of lessons all of which must be tailored to meet the common core curriculum requirements.

Take a look around the classroom. Stuff, Stuff and More Stuff. Not many textbooks. Why. Kids walk around all day with own computers which are kept in the room for overnight charging.

TIME MANAGEMENT: Come in, put your stuff down, get out your notes and notebook, sharpen your pencils, go to the bathroom,  go to the nurse, have a snack, get a drink, use a tissue (throw it in the trashcan please), turn on your computers, access the website, complete the assignment. This has a clock of about 1-2 minutes.

Now begin your work. You have 4 minutes to complete the three tasks and be sure to stay on task. Okay two minutes to go. Now switch to your folders and take out your homework for me to check and sign. While I am checking your homework begin working on the first page on the packet I have placed on your desk. Please pick up the packets that are on the floor. Wait, quiet. Listen to the announcement. Okay everybody got that announcement. No chicken nuggets for lunch. Just fruit, yogurt, veggies and mac and cheese. I feel your disappointing pain.

You now should be on page two of the packet. Wait for my instructions. Lets go. Lets go. We are eight minutes into the class and falling behind. We have to complete all these assignments before the bell rings.

Now that I have presented the instructions using the smart-board, white dry-erase board and projector you are able to complete pages 2-3-4 of the packet. You have six minutes.

Time for stations. Take a clipboard. Place your work under the clip and start at any station making certain you show all your work, complete the task, solve the riddle and create your own unique finished product. You must complete all 10 stations to arrive at your final answer on which you will be graded. You have eight minutes remaining in this class so work as quickly as possible without negatively impacting (like wisdom teeth) the integrity of your work.

Two minutes till the bell rings. Gather all your stuff. Place your completed packet on the desk next to the door on your way to your next class.

Permission slips are due tomorrow for next weeks field trip. Remember to bring in your food donations to help those who need some help. Be kind to everyone. See you tomorrow.

That was one class, one day for fifth grade. There are about 180 days of school.

Is it any wonder why kids walk around with stress toys.

Is it any wonder why kids are on medications.

Is it any wonder why teachers go to sleep at 9 PM and are lucky if they can watch Jeopardy and Wheel.

And you think it is difficult to answer the daily question of: What’s for dinner? How many times have you ordered pizza as the pacifier?

Soon every kid with have an IEP, becuase we are manufacturing special Kids or at least we are leading them to believe that. Oops! I don’t know how to handle rejection, disappointment, failure and losing and every “adult” will see a therapist just to keep up!

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The closest I got to walking in the shoes of a Law Enforcement Officer was when I was in the military where everyone got to work security. I got the Main Gate armed with an M-16. That combination was not the best of Military Intelligence and I have quite a funny (now) story but will save that for another time since this is serious. Remember my blog is about the Serious and Silly.

Go about your day, employed in Law Enforcement where you are watched, inspected, ridiculed, questioned, abused, cursed at, on the front line and carrying on your body pounds and pounds of gear. Some of the gear is more lightweight than in the past but just as cumbersome especially when its need to be accessed and used.

How would you like to be filmed, recorded, photographed and taped every time you make a move. I wonder if law enforcement folks live with the fear of the fart not for soiling clothes but for the embarrassment of the sounds of the not so silent.

How would you like to work in an environment where you are constantly analyzed, critiqued and observed all day everyday. I know, some of you out there work in toxic workplace environments with a supervisor, boss or manager who makes your life and everyone else’s life miserable because they, the bully boss, are most miserable and figure with their power they can make their subordinates feel lower and weaker than they feel about themselves.

It is similar but not the same with law enforcement who everyday lives in risk and fear of what waits for them around the corner, as they approach a vehicle, respond to a call and what is going on at their homes.

There might be a rush on living on the edge facing the unknown but when your life is on the line everyday all day it must wear you down physically, emotionally, spiritually, and domestically.

Law enforcement is a prime example of:

What we do good nobody remembers and what we do bad nobody forgets.

Of course, if you watch the local news occasionally there will be a story about an officer doing something noble for others. This story usually comes at the end of the news broadcast with a bit of news hosts utterances as they get ready to remind us to log onto their website for more details as the theme song erases their voices. These type of good stories also happen after about 10-15 minutes of news reporting of serious “bad” things happening in the law enforcement community.

Two of the most important and influential jobs in our country, who get paid according to scale and time which if you factor in the variables that are becoming the norm, amounts to a little more than minimum wage, struggle everyday with the unknown and who are generally un-thanked, un-noticed and un-appreciated. Unless of course, something goes wrong and the cycle begins.

It’s not the glamour portrayed in a half hour or hour of carefully crafted words and scenes.

You Try It.

Then we’ll listen to your story and do a before and after analysis.

Hopefully, with a little insight, information and knowledge you and all of us will have a better understanding on how and what some folks do to feed their families.

A New Low or IS IT?

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Nation of Manure.

I hated it back then and loathe it today: the dreaded TUNNEL. Look at ME. Look at ME. Look at ME. That’s the parents not the kids. Kids and parents as well, can’t spell tunnel which is one of those confusing “le or el words like angel and angle, bagle and bagel, ankle or ankel. With only 26 characters English is perhaps the most difficult language to learn. I read the red book which I also read yesterday. Huh?

Last week at a youth soccer game a coach / parent of 12 year old kids impaled a ten foot pole into the ground and mounted a video camera on top of the pole in order to record the game.

The purpose of this maneuver was to create a video history of the game not for distribution to the team, families and grandparents who could not get to the game.

The purpose was to gather the kids in the coach’s home to review, critique, point-out flaws, mistakes and errors and ultimately embarrass the kids in front of each other for their lackluster and LOSING performance. Eventually some form of cheating will occur, not by the kids, but by and for an “adult” in need of winning at any cost and for the gratification that comes with winning.

Who out there, with the exception of leadership, has attended mandatory Ethics seminars and signed Ethics agreements with severe penalties for violations. It is for we the people while “leaders” receive, receive and receive more until the greed makes them known. Their punishment. No electronics for a fortnight.

You can’t win unless you CHEAT:

EXAMPLE: School Scandals where grades are changed by leadership who threaten subordinates if they don’t play the cheating game.

EXAMPLE: Sports Cheating which is why coaches cover their mouths with the play card preventing opponents and spies from reading their lips.

EXAMPLE: Insider Trading. Oh wait that doesn’t happen or does it?

EXAMPLE: Read and listen to the news stories where, on an almost daily basis there is a report about Cheating Scandals not sandals. See one letter makes a difference. Move the vowels and Taxes becomes Texas.

EXAMPLE: What was on that last expense account you submitted?

Here again, bad coaching, parenting and role modeling.

Kids are exposed to horrific events on a daily basis since they are electronically connected to the instant, well beyond microwave, world in which we exist where bad stuff takes precedent over good stuff. Fear is real. Fear leads to ailments requiring kids to be treated with medicine, counseling, therapy and an IEP for school. In a few years every kid will have an IEP and every “adult” will be in therapy. Fear is powerful, controlling and an impediment to life. From where does Fear come? Who controls Fear? Who is charge of Fear? Like most things, if you see and hear about it enough times you believe it. Is it like laundry that needs to be washed? Are our brains the laundry?

Once I drove several kids who were friends and teammates of our kid. I could do this since I was not their coach just a parent with a station wagon transporting kids from their first game which they lost 20-3, to their second game about 15 miles away from the first game. I anticipated a quiet, emotional and perhaps tearful ride but to my delight the kids were laughing, joking, singing and being kids on a ride to their next event. They completely strayed from the first games embarrassing loss. The kids could care less. Some of the parents, who live thought their kids, carried the first game loss well into the second game even though the team was winning.

Who are these “experts’ who usually don’t have kids to raise, telling we the parents, cooks, schedulers, drivers, advocates, cleaners, nutritionists, coaches, science project doers, organizers and worst of all enablers not empowerment teachers, reciting case studies on proper parenting. Look at the data and the new word, analytics. That’s where to find answers not necessarily the truth. Most recently the polls were wrong almost every poll out there was wrong. But he experts explained so intelligently, expertly and convincingly relying on obfuscation to relieve and explain why. But we still don’t and never will know the truth as is the case in most controversial issues and some that are not so controversial. Gotta win. Cheat? Just a little. What could be so bad?

They are the same “experts” who are overweight telling us how to lose weight and keep it off. Look at ME. I did it. So can you. But for how long? The Yo-Yo affect eventually wins. Can we see the actual,  not altered like school grades, of the success rates for the weight loss industry. Same for smoking, drinking, drugging, etc.

The same “experts” hustling child raising, parenting, marriage, spirituality, faith, relationships, addictions most of whom don’t have kids, are single perhaps with multiple divorcees and hooked on the appeal they get from folks who listen to them the “experts”. Just send your money to the “legitimate” hustler hiding behind whatever facade is their mission. Even Dorothy and Toto uncovered cheating and fraud. Books, tapes and videos will cost extra. No money today. That’s okay. Next week you will get your Social Security check which you can use for payment. Get fresh food with your leftover money.

Kids are told how great they are, how wonderful their performance was and how much everyone likes what they do.

Results of this rather limited child raising can be seen by watching sports, where on every play there are multiple high fives, fist taps, daps, chest pumps and celebrations for doing what they are suppose to be doing. On every play!!! Watch a game and the proof is right there.

Coaches can’t coach, they must coddle and affirm their players even when they are not deserving of praise.

Teachers? I don’t know how and why they do what they do. The kids are never in the wrong. When a teacher should be proving discipline, teaching respect, honesty and building character and integrity they, the teachers, are subject to ridicule and even banishment for doing the things parents are suppose to be doing. Why? Because school leadership comes in for 2-3 years, messes up what works, endures staff exodus and then the leaders leave to repeat the process in another school district and for more money. Does anyone check references? If a leader is so good and valued would it not be incumbent of the school to retain such a valued leader? Oh wait. What exactly is Leadership?

Leadership:

TRUST

Accessibility

Accountability

Availability

Responsibility

Communications

Visibility

Knowledge about the kids, staff, families and community

Involvement

Participation

I guess all of the above is hard to sustain and maintain which is why it is difficult to retain LEADERS except like many of our elected leaders many of whom have the job for life but without the rituals, uniforms, ornaments, and head coverings of leaders who lead with immunity from cheating or they pay boo-koo bucks to make it go away which it does not, proof of which can be found by listening to the families and more importantly the kids.

Keep an open mind, please. 

I Think, Therefore???

Listen – Listen – Listen PLEASE LISTEN!!!

When listening to your favorite talk radio / television, podcast, news program or just about anyone who talks or is a guest offering their expertise write down the number of times you hear the words “I Think” spoken by an individual, panel, host, guest or even the delivery person with today’s take out meal eliminating the need to shop, prepare, cook and oh yuck: Clean-up.

Status symbols once were displayed by the bag containing your purchases at well known and soon to be obsolete brick and mortar stores. Status is now derived from the food facility bag displaying from where you bought your meal or better yet from where the delivery originated.

Everyone is saying “I Think” because they just don’t know. If the knew they would say “I Know” or “I Know for a Fact”. But be careful when listening to someone say “let me be perfectly honest with you” which means everything they said prior to making this exclamation is subject to being untrue, dishonest or a blatant lie. What is said and meant is to keep talking to seek agreement, affirmation and confirmation of convincingly spoken words thought to be accurate, perhaps true, yet doubt is cast among us since trust is nowhere to be found.

I suppose if we hear stuff often enough we tend to believe it whether it is true or not. I Think it is true but I Just Don’t know.

The truth may be out there, but where? Actually truth is and begins with you, me, us we, them, they, he, she, I and everyone else I overlooked. The most difficult thing to face – head on – is the truth, Our Truth which is painful, damaging and suppressed leading to all sorts of unhealthy conditions that can be reduced and eliminated if we could just face and conquer our own truth. Who can look in the mirror while washing your face or brushing your teeth? Can you look into your eyes and like who and what you see and what you have become? I Think you can, I Know you will someday soon!!!

Why Didn’t I Think of This? I Did!!!

An overlooked demographic for employment is the “Senior Citizen” market.

In addition to being prompt, professional, courteous, respectful, thorough, wise, intelligent, knowledgeable, team players, role models, conscientious, flexible, organized, communicative and otherwise nice to have around Senior Citizens of age to receive the earned privileged to which they contributed during the income earning years, relieve a huge economic and financial burden to corporations, businesses and agencies by not requiring health insurance since they, the Senior Citizens, usually receive their Healthcare Insurance form the Medicare System which, by the way, is very good.

This is a double winner for the hiring organization since they benefit from the value added Senior Citizen employee and they, the hiring organization, do not have to pay the high costs for Healthcare Insurance for their corps of Senior Citizens who also add value by being ready, willing and able to mentor the younger generations offering life skills and lessons learned and earned during their previous employment careers.

People Power, We Have It!!!

Good Monday Morning and welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Palace of Manure where you can learn, grow, prosper, laugh and maybe think, just a little, about the world in which most of us exist.

Decades ago, at the four corner intersections of locations throughout our country stood four different gas stations all selling the same products and what were one services such as washing the windshield, checking the oil and offering to pass the time engaged in conversation especially if you knew the attendant servicing you and your car, which many of us did. If you stretch your imagination you may consider this “Social Behaviors”.

During the manufactured and controlled gas crisis, and for the next generation or two, gas prices have been controlled by the same small group (perhaps 1-3%) of the people who control almost all the money and finances of the world. Control, not just in Maxwell Smart and Agent 99.

Everyday, almost hourly, gas prices would rise. I believe a law was enacted stating that a gas station could only raise their gas prices once per day which may still be applicable today.

The People had the Power to influence and control gas prices.

All four corner gas stations priced their gas within a penny or two of each other. The simple way to affect change would be for the majority, if not all drivers, to purchase their gas from only one of the four corner options. The other three non-used gas stations would eventually lower their prices to reduce their inventory and keep their staff employed. The expert, certified, experienced, educated and worldly economists, theorists and strategists, more than likely, have a name for this to include in their college textbooks that kids must purchase (yet, more debt) and to which the scholarly elite must publish and contribute to keep their employment status. For me simple works best. You should know this if you read my Blog Posts, where you will find I am a simple guy which is why folks get along with me. They like the simple things in life.

To maintain the constant price reductions or until the price was set and maintained at an affordable and not confiscatory (like taxes) price then the process could continue until a more stable market was established.

Back then this was circulated among drivers who thought it to be a good plan, however most opted-out for convenience purposes and most likely, did not participate is this easy simple economic plan. We can be a lazy bunch, correct. Proof of our laziness can be found on one of your screens offering you an exact hour and minute count of how much time you spend (waste) on all your electronic devises. Go out and play, will ya!!!

Today we are presented with a situation built on convenience but the hidden agenda is economics, isn’t always. Plus, this is an addition to the “A-Social” world in which most of us exist.

Please take notice at supermarkets and the big retail brick and mortar stores which soon may be going the way of the neighborhood ruining malls.

You don’t have to search too far but will soon discover upon physical “check-out” that people are being replaced by yet another scan and screen combination.

Humans are being replaced by electronics with no personalities, charm, character, familiarity and a welcoming smile and a closing thank you very much have a nice day (see my Blog Post about clichés).

This is another form of conditioning and controlling the human species. Soon electronic check-out will replace but a few of the humans who offer more than their service. Many of the well known big store retailers began this many years ago offering merchandise with no human with whom a customer can interact . Grab and go just like food. Reduce the staff, load the racks with stuff and let the customer fend for themselves. It was once the hallmark of successful businesses to provide the very best customer service since without customers to service you have no business. I learned the value, importance and significance of customer service and many life lessons working as an eleven year old paperboy learning and honing my skills with my brother as my role-model and our parents advice and support.

In conclusion – Not Really-  (don’t just love those words especially when you are attending a lecture, seminar, training, forum or symposium where you learn about things you will never use in your work) let us gather our energy, engage ourselves with purpose and use only human staffed “check-out” lanes leaving the electronic check-outs vacant, bare and void of us.

The best thing to come out of this is perhaps, just perhaps, a job or two or more (yours) will be saved so folks can earn a few bucks for the basics no not food clothing and shelter but more of internet, phone and cable. But only for a brief period until elimination of brick and mortar, employees and customer service are upon us in full force, actually reduction / elimination.

By the way, Customer Service has been replaced by “Surveys”. See my previous Blog Post.

Also, if you read a bit carefully you will notice that my Blog Posts, though written on many different topics, are elementary and universal in their messages but you have to read my Blog Posts with an open mind and, more importantly, an open heart. Like our bodies everything is related, connected and has a purpose. So, too, does the body of my Blog. Yeah, I know the same is true for all the electronic devices out there except they don’t have the human touch.

See you in the check-out lane waiting to receive some good old fashioned, not yet obsolete, customer service.

Wouldn’t you like to know what the experts have planned for us next? It’s out there. We might have to look under a stone or two since we can’t move the boulders where this stuff is actually hidden waiting for release for control purposes.

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Just like Colombo there’s one more thing.

Yesterday I was at a social event. I went up to the beverage station for a glass of water. The staffer serving had a unique combination of finger nail polish colors. It was tastefully done and not necessarily a Look at Me – Look at Me – Look at Me moment.

There was time when I would have made mention of the nail polish colors offering some comments about their appearance. However, in today’s world I held my words, backed away and left with my glass of water. Later during the event I went for a second glass of water only this time another guest was engaged in conversation about the the nail polish colors. When this guest was served and returned to their seat I asked for a glass of water and took a brave, bold and courageous step venturing into risky waters as I offered my affirmation to the young lady explaining I was reluctant and hesitant to do so on my first visit to her due to “societal” concerns we have been brainwashed to feel based on the many recent well known and highly publicized scandalous situations among leaders with leverage, influence and power (men) and women (subordinates). I explained my concerns and the young lady was most gracious in accepting my compliments. Her comforting words eliminated my fear of having an ulterior motive instead of being honest, trustworthy and appropriate as most of us are.

We must be cautious and careful in what we say, how we say it and to whom is the intended recipient of our words. I just don’t want to be wrong and hurt someone’s feelings though I have no intention ever of doing so. But, you never know how things will be received and interpreted. This is an apologetic world and thought must be given prior to words being spoken. That is, unless of course, if you are a leader contributing and part of the root cause of the toxic, venomous and poisonous world in which many of us are forced to exist.

 DEBT and , As Always, A Little Bit More, Perhaps Too Much Some Might Say!!!

Welcome Mounds of manure World: My Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Shrine of Manure where things come right at you to make you think and perhaps even laugh.

DEBT: Why do kids and families have to pay for college? I am not talking about “free college for all” as is uttered on the campaign trail.

No-No-No. I am writing about colleges and universities with endowments large enough to tear down and reconstruct all their buildings with money left over to pay for travel, vacations, theater, meals and other stuff to which leaders have been conditioned to believe they deserve and are “entitled” to (the same folks who reduce or eliminate “entitlements” to those in need) while some kids on campus are hungry.

How do kids begin their lives after “high”er education when they can only get “hired’ for low paying jobs or un-paid internships.

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We love Heroes including the Hero sandwich also known as a Sub, Hoagie, Zeppelin, Torpedo, Poor Boy and Grinder.

Our manufactured heroes, the ones who bring us onion (see previous ONION Post) opportunities, provide, protect and serve for which we as a county ought to be collectively grateful and thankful which most of us are. That is until it is time for pay.

How many Military Veterans and First Responders are in need, right now, for medical services of all kinds. And where are we to provide for them, our Heroes? What happens to the money? Why are Homeless numbers and life taking incidences on the rise and growing everyday? Where is LEADERSHIP when needed the most? Folks were once there for us and would do it again but without money for medical care they will not have the chance to again serve or do much else except struggle, suffer and strain to survive.

Funding was given to the Veterans Administration. Where and to whom did the money go? Why has “Leadership” changed several times in the past few years? Why can’t the Veterans be served with pride, dignity and professional care?

Why does it take one “celebrity” endorsement to have voices heard?

Why can’t the right thing be done? Spike is right as always.

We can explain that “Y” is the 25th letter in the alphabet. We can explain that “Y” is the first letter in YMCA, YWCA and all the other “Y’s”. But we cannot explain “why” when it comes to having leaders not leading in the best interest of those they lead.

It is like business: Customer Service is the hallmark of successful ventures. Without customers to service there is no business. The same is true for “non-profit” type organizations. Service those in your care and to whom you are responsible.

Leaders: Do YOUR Job!!! That is YOUR only platform. Yes, you can golf, travel at our expense, send your kids to private schools, maintain your privacy which you will do regardless, but not until you Do YOUR Job. Have your share, cut, portion and consideration but put the rest into Doing Your Job. Take three dollars, keep your one and put the other two back into and for the people you lead.

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Everything is great until it isn’t.

Everyone is wonderful until they are not.

Everything is the best until it is not.

Everything and Everyone are AMAZING (see previous Cliché Manure) until it is not.

EXAMPLES: Are all over and abundant. Look into your world. Look at the world outside. You will be AMAZED!!!

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COLOR: There is no Black, White, Brown, Yellow, Red or any combination of the color chart.

Green is the only color with universal representation.

I’d like to go to that restaurant, movie, event, etc but I don’t have the money- GREEN.

I love you I can’t afford you – GREEN

I want to travel, buy new stuff, but more stuff, join that group- club – organization: GREEN

I envy you: GREEN

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Make a doctor’s appointment, travel arrangements or schedule your vehicle for service. Yes it can be done on-line and “in person” using your phones.

After you make the initial appointment you receive:

E-mail Conformation almost immediately

E-mail Reminder to Confirm the appointment a few days before the appointment

Voice Mail reminder: Press 0 to select your language. Press 1 to confirm. Press 2 to cancel. Press 3 to change. Press 4 to speak with a human. Press 5 to listen to the message again. Press 6 if you forgot to Press any of the other numbers. Say Yes not only to The Dress but to confirm the confirmation. And you thought only kids go through Confirmation.

Text message reminder of your appointment with a phone number to call with the same stuff I just wrote about in the Voice Mail reminder.

Reminder Message sent to your Patient Portal. Now what’s my password?

Now for the SURVEY or SURVEYS asking: How am I doing? Were you satisfied? Please take a few moments, not minutes, moments are brief minutes can be eternal according to the survey experts. Think about it. When someone asks, “Hey you gotta few minutes, this will just take 2 seconds”. You know you will be there for more than just a few moments.

Surveys ask deep probing questions wanting to extract from you the type of quality care, service and performance you received. Do you go right to the columns, either on the extreme left or right margins where the highest scores appear and just click, or is it check all those boxes not wanting to tell the actual truth in case someone may be at risk for losing their job and you don’t want to be the cause or are you, with the power of the mouse, one of those who read, analyze and ponder each question then proceed to sow your might.

Surveys after service. More of the same with space for comments, sort of subjective and objective balance except for the Power of Definition which you have as the Survey Filler Outer.

Surveys are like the recycle bins. Eventually everything ends up in the same place.

Everyone wants to know how they did which is a form of Look at me – Look at Me – Look at Me similar to 5 year old kids who show Grandma and Grandpa they can tie their sneakers which many elders have trouble doing: Velcro, loafers and slip-ons for Elders.

Do you complete tour surveys immediately while thoughts and events are easily gathered or do you wait a day or more when there is nothing else in your inbox and when when time has allowed wounds to heal, egos to be tempered and facts to be jumbled?

Remember and Don’t Forget. I never remember anything I forget and I never forget anything I remember!!!

 More Random Stuff!!!

Welcome to yet another entry for my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary More with Manure.

What has often been written, spoken and worth repeating here at my Manure Command Center.

I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.

The difficult takes some time, the impossible takes a little longer.

In order to get there first you must leave.

What we do good nobody remembers, what we do bad nobody forgets.

I never forget anything I remember and I never remember anything I forget.

Folks like the simple things in life which is why they get along with me.

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College Tuition aka DEBT:

DEBT: The worst of the worst “four letter words”.

Why does any kid have to pay for college?

Let’s have an Senior Investigative Reporter or a Junior Investigative Reporter or better yet a novice who can find their way through the myriad of distractions to investigate colleges and their ENDOWMENTS. All that is needed is full disclosure (right!!!) and a following of the money trail. There must be more than enough money to relieve the burden of kids attending college, learning and working beyond the classroom and incurring DEBT for those who pay the bills.

Where does all that donated money go?

Who is living off the expense account? Not spending my money, spending OPM. I’d never do that if I had to pay for it. ______________________________________________________________________________

Speaking of Colleges and Universities, why are some schools known as University of______________ while other schools are known as ____________ University?

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Colleges / Universities are great places to retire. Being around young folks keeps you vibrant, engaged, aware, involved, active, as well as, young in mind, body, spirit and soul. Dynamic rather static. You don’t stop playing because you get old, you get old because you stop playing.

Think about it: Colleges and Universities offer Art, Theater, Music, Concerts, Sports, Classes, Travel, Street Fairs, Lectures, Gym, Community, Festivals, Libraries, Connection to Causes, Events and more, as well as, perhaps shuffleboard, water aerobics, bingo, book clubs, cards and dinner at 4 PM

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If you think about it we have been negatively conditioned since youth, maybe birth. A brief sample list includes the following and much more I am not thinking of right now but I am sure you can add to my DON’T List.

DON’T go outside with wet hair, DON’T swim after eating (must wait an hour), DON’T talk with your mouth full, DON’T sit like that, DON”T crack your knuckles, DON’T wear THAT!!!, DON’T drink from the hose, use filtered water like we have in the house since we DON’T know what is in the tap water nor do we know what is in the bottled and /or filtered water though we must TRUST somebody.

A rebellious, I’ll show you, I’m doing it my way not yours and Watch Me or is it the Look At Me, Look At Me, Look At Me generation taking all the DON’TS and making them DO’S. That’s just nature at least in our civilized society and culture.

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There is my way, your way, his way, her way, their way and ways coming at you from many sources and of course there is the RIGHT WAY which you create by using YOUR Power of Definition

When you read the internet, whether truth lurks, you will find you are doing soooooooooooooo many things WRONG such as:

*Raising Kids*Managing or is it mismanaging money*Laundry *Folding Clothes *Holding a drink*Eating a Cupcake*Storing Peanut Butter*Eating Pizza*Eating most everything else*Cleaning*Baking Potatoes*Ironing*Slicing Food*Sleeping*Cooking especially your thanksgiving turkey which for some reason still offers an 800 number to call for cooking instructions or maybe that has been replaced by internet info. I can’t remember so I’ll just wait until November*Storing Stuff (just throw it in the drawer)*Pumping Gas*Getting Dressed (do you out on your shoes then your pants?*Shaving*Exercising: one trainer says this way another says that way* PLACING THE TOILET PAPER????

Usually whichever way you do something is fine until you meet and worse live with someone who corrects you having it their way just like a burger. Regardless of how you do things there will always be someone suggesting you do it their way. For Peace, be a little flexible even to the point of anticipating their moves which is why learning the game of chess is so vital. Perhaps leaders should play chess instead of playing with our stuff even though we know sharing is satisfying, gratifying and just plain good.

For today’s MANURE:Change-Thank You

Good Thursday Morning and welcome to another edition, or is it addition of, or is it, to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Field of Manure brought to you by, paid for and sponsored by me.

Today’s manure is brief which is a change from previous Posts. More about change as you read.

SYK which means So You Know instead of the more familiar FYI. See I Changed something. You will know when it is time to change because your world my be filled with contents of a diaper that needs to be changed. There is no better place for change than there unless of course you have never done this loving task for babies and those in the more advanced years in need of assistance in the most personal situation. I think it is called LOVE even if your hire someone to do it for your loved ones.

By the way, I have known guys who bragged that they never did or would they ever change their babies diapers. “That’s why I have a wife” was their cry. Same guys never leave a Tip at a restaurant, golf course or for those who provide services such as delivering the mail, collecting the garbage, protecting the public and way back paperboys like me and my brother. Oh, we got tips from about 95% of our customers but there were always a few who never tipped and demanded more and more services which of course we provided knowing that we just cannot please those who live miserable existences complaining all the time. Oh yeah, the tips were always given to us using change (coins) and we were happy to receive the tips.

Speaking of change. You just don’t find much, if any, change (coins) on the ground anymore. REASON: Credit Cards. No need for cash resulting in change (coins).

The goal of this Post, like all my Posts, is for readers to raise their awareness, open their eyes, minds, hearts and thoughts while taking notice of the ever changing world in which we exist.

When did we begin referring to folks as their title Chef, Doctor, Nurse, Coach, Officer followed by their first name. It must be the warm fuzzies all grown up.

Example: Nurse Gwen – Coach Don, Doctor Chris, Chef Pierre, Officer Dave, etc.

I was introduced to my parents friends, aka, Mr. Davis, Mrs. Walker, etc. When I became an adult (though many question this transition) I met these folks it was still Mr. Davis, Mrs. Walker and so forth. I have heard kids refer to their parents using their parents first name. Like the world of creativity, art and music I just can’t get there.

Example: Watch for it. Listen to it. Decide to become part of it. It is your choice.

Please take notice of the almost, but not yet though it is circulating throughout the world of all forms of communications, ever present in opening remarks by a speaker, guest, host and facilitators of most every panel, discussion and presentation.

It is becoming custom, ritual and will be a tradition (unless of course change takes over) to have the opening remarks and commentary begin with “Thank You” and if you stay until the end you will hear the obligatory Thank You’s repeated.

Thank you for your time.

Thank you taking your time from your, I know, your very busy schedule.

Thank you for being here.

Thank you for having me on your show / program.

Thank you for sharing.

Thank you for thanking me /us.

Often the Thank You is followed by an explanation, purpose and cause to attend whatever it is folks are attending or in which they are participating.

I know none of this is new or even worthy of thought or discussion but I just want folks to take notice of one small part of their world that is changing forever or at least until the next time change is upon us.

Change is, of course, the one constant that is always changing. To what, we won’t know until it is part of our culture. We will wait and see if it is worthy of change because, as we have been told by the certified, credentialed, educated and worldly experts, the more things change the more things change. I’ll bet you were anticipating the more cliche of cliches which I will not put here.

Does anyone write Thank You notes / letters? Nah, maybe send a Thank You using text, e-mail, emoji or other impersonal method to extend your thanks. Or do we let our  Thank You’s go the way of our Dreams.

Finally, for those who do, Thank You for reading Marty’s Mound of Manure.

Yes, Then What and Other Random Thoughts!!!

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Manure Pasture where you will read, think, grow, laugh, prosper and perhaps raise your awareness about life, your life, in general.

By the way, I hope you can get past my speling and gramar misstakes

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Yes!!! Yes !!! Yes!!!

No this not about biological and physiological fulfillment. It is about events that occur when you get a “YES”.

EXAMPLE: I want to preface this POST by informing readers that although I am using generic gender references I am including all identities.

There is a young man who wants to go to a movie. He asks a girl who tells him, “No I can’t go because it is my Grandparents anniversary which I will be attending. Okay. Fine. He asks a second girl and is told that she and her girl friends are having a “Girls Night Out”. Okay. Fine. He asks a third girl who says, ” yes, I will go out with you, thanks for asking”. See, what guys still don’t know, especially with all the social movements that have occurred the past 50 years and more,  is that girls still, even in modern times, like to be asked. It makes one feel important, noticed, worthy and a whole bunch more including just being thought about. I know what you are thinking. Yeah, why wasn’t the third girl asked first. Well (Ronald Regan) stop second guessing everything. Take life as it comes by making good things happen for yourself and others as well.

Now the “fun” begins. It is decision making time, The following are encumbrances, perhaps impediments, that must be overcome so the time together can be simple, enjoyable and fun.

What movie do want to see? There are three I like. What about your choices? Here again there are too many choices which affects the decision making similar to deciding which ice cream to order, what to watch among the 900 channels and which pair of shoes to choose.

What time do you want to see the movie? I like the 7 PM show but if you want to see the 10 PM show I am okay with that.

Which movie theater? I like the one with those comfy reclining seats, unobstructed views and clean bathrooms. Yes, everyone cares about clean bathrooms except at outdoor events where the portable toilets overflow with folks walking in puddles for relief.

Do you want to eat before or after the movie? I prefer before since eating late at night keeps me awake. What kind of food do you prefer? I’m open to anything? It’s your call.

Shall I pick you up at your home? Do you want to meet at the movie? Depending on what time and where we choose I can do either except that if we choose the movie across town from where I work then it is best if we meet at the movie theater. What do you think?

What to wear? Nuff said!!!

You get the idea. When you get a “No”it’s over. Nothing more to say, think and do. But when you get a “Yes”, oh my, the things that must happen to make it happen.

The same scenario occurs during the job search, buying a car, the college journey, finding a place to live and of course everyone’s all time favorite: “What’s for dinner”

We get rejected more than we get accepted. We “lose” more than we win”. Learning and growing from a loss is actually a WIN!!! Success comes so infrequently we don’t know how to handle it. There are those who run from and deny themselves success. By the way, denial is the longest river in the world, I think. I should fact check with a search engine or listening device. Too much to handle including stress, tension and anxiety. I’ll settle in my comfort zone of mediocrity. Why risk more rejection? We make excuses for failure instead of providing REASONS for SUCCESS. What are your REASONS?

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Oops!!! I forget my lunch, keys, papers, raincoat, etc. etc. etc.

With all the conveniences of reminders we have such as daily – weekly – monthly planners, alarms, notices, calendars (manual and electronic), post it notes magnetically attached to the fridge, white boards with color coded markers for the names of those who need to do whatever (I’m the blue, no I’m the blue and thus the day begins), next to the front door, notes on torn pieces paper left on the kitchen counter-top or whatever other methods you use, to remind yourself, to have everything in place to start your day or leave home for an outing we still FORGET Stuff. I never remember anything I forget and I never forget anything I remember. 

Maybe, just maybe, we have too much stuff to remember (no, I am not going to write that we have too much on our plates. Oops I just did. Oh those nasty cliches). This happens using only about 10% percent of our cranium capacity according to the experts. Same is true for computer usage or so we are told. Ten percent. We can do better. Let’s challenge ourselves. Go for 11%. Double numbers are known to be lucky but I can’t remember who wrote and said that and worse I can’t remember where and when I first learned this tidbit of useless information of which there are many to choose. Yet another decision!!! Yet another need for reminders!!! Yet more time sent on remembering and reminding that actually DOING!!!

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‘Tis the season. Not the holiday season though if you check your calendars you will find that every month has a day for recognition, observation, celebration, no school /work and 50% off at the stores. Except August which is reserved for summer vacations with no need to be around to buy flowers, gifts and sit in restaurants for hours at long tables which are socially weak since you cannot listen and often see those at the other end. Round tables are better. Maybe the Knights were Right to keep everyone in Sight which can cause a Fright especially at Night even in areas away from Blight when it should be a Delight with no need to Fight.

The warm weather season gives us freedom from the bundles and layers of clothes needed to keep warm, outdoors time since we have been existing indoors in the warmth of our homes except for the unfortunate street folks who we dismiss. It’s their choice. They don’t want help. REALLY. Maybe it’s our choice not to help. Too busy trying to remember all the stuff I forgot.

It is time for the rude, crude and socially unacceptable to spread their wings and fly into our space with their loud music coming from their vehicles, late night on the back deck over imbibing and indulging and just plain thoughtless selfish attitudes and behaviors not caring about those around them focusing on their own belly buttons. It’s all about me. What other guy? Does anyone exist but me? Look at Me!!! Look at Me!!! Look at Me!!!

Have you ever had someone, over the phone, yell, scream, holler, accuse, curse, harass and badger you about an issue they believe is larger than life? If you are one of those people who does this please refrain. It is ugly, nasty and without cause. Please do not disrespect those wanting to provide help. Please do not shed your miserable existence on us by causing misery. Please do not bully someone in an attempt to make you feel good about yourself and to elevate your position from the bottom step or lower on a ladder. One of the words in the opening of this POST is Civil. Can you be that?

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Whenever someone tells you, “it’s easy anyone can do it” be prepared to keep asking for help until you finally get it and then find yourself telling someone,” it’s easy anyone can do it”. This is similar to following directions. I listen understand and comprehend. Yet I still seek help to get to the destination.

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DESENSITIZATION

In the 1960’s our country was in recovery from World War II. Prosperity was in vogue and folks were enhancing their positions at work and at home. Residential and commercial suburban development and sprawl was in fashion and offered an option (choice) from bulging cities.

Television was gaining momentum and with it conditioning of habit forming behaviors was upon us. Subliminal messages are not so subliminal or are they?

There are three things that occur to indicate society is in jeopardy (without Alex and Contestants).

First, language is disrespected. We just don’t care what we say. Example provided below.

Second, the gap between the haves and have-nots is greater. Take a look around.

Third, no TRUST in leadership. Listen to the NEWS. Observe at work. Look in your backyard.

EXAMPLE: On prime time network, pre-cable television, Hell and Damn were delivered to a nation of viewers. The country was infuriated. Boycotts of sponsors happened. The fall was inevitable. A country in moral crisis.

Today with all the outlets available hell and damn are the least of concerns. Kids are exposed to not only language usage flaws but images of violence, crime, disaster, human behaviors and much more all indicating that these are normal, acceptable and proper values. Adults are exposed to the same stuff only it is called NEWS.

When we hear and see the same images and events over and over we become DESENSITIZED which is why language and the timeliness of inappropriate usage abounds. We seem not to care what we say and to whom we say it. When you hear Lenny and Georges words repeatedly those words become un-empowering since after all they are just words and why not use them for emphasis, affect and shock. Like most things in life there is a time and place for them as well. Maybe in a more selected forum and arena. Strength and power come when you have an opportunity to do something and choose not to. I hope you have enough money to buy a luxury car and then choose to buy a less luxurious car while satisfying and rewarding yourself for your achievements without the need for others to Look at Me!!! Look at Me!!! Look at Me!!!

DESENSITIZED: The word was used this mourning (no need for spell check here) on the  morning news when the reporter was reporting on another mass shooting. Does this word need to be added to my list of Clichés. Let us all think and believe otherwise.

 The ONION

This Manure is called the ONION because ONIONS make you cry . There are tears of happiness, joy and of course sadness.

ONIONS became popular about 30-40 years ago when talk type television shows had guests tell their “STORIES” all of which made the audience and viewers cry.

Modern day network news programs present their shows with disasters, corruption, crime, murders, horror, and so forth but they always seem to end with a 30-40 second ONION story that makes you forget all the terrible events just presented.

While ONIONS make you cry nobody ever felt good when slicing and dicing (sorry Clyde) ONIONS as part of meal preparation.

EXAMPLE: Many are times when an ONION story is told showing an elementary school kid engaged in elementary school stuff when all of a sudden out of nowhere (at least to the kid) their parent arrives either from behind a door, in a costume or mostly in full Military Uniform. The parent and kid have not seen each other in months since the parent has been deployed overseas protecting our country. The reaction by the kids is usually hands to face in shock, tears flowing, an embrace and jumping into the awaiting parents arms squeezing and hugging  never wanting to let go. These scenes are most often delivered without dialogue or conversation but just the soft, soothing and comforting voice of the reporter delivering the ONION story. The camera zooms in for a close-up and then fades away as the scene for television purposes is over just in time for more reality, or is it, tv.

This type of scenario is presented in various ways but the message is always the same: ONIONS – Tears- Heroes.

Growing up in Philly I always ate a hoagie which is also known as a torpedo, poor boy, grinder, zeppelin, sub, and of course HERO.

Currently the search for heroes is never ending. The Military and First Responder’s are cast as Heroes but they will say they are not the Heroes but with our desire and thirst for a HERO we have chosen the sacrificing, caring, passionate folks who wear all the different kinds of uniforms which in today’s world offer a resource, status, recognition, appreciation, except of course, for those who develop life threatening illnesses that create strained and difficult times for their families especially when claims for insurance coverage are delayed or worse denied.

I am no HERO, probably the furthest thing from a HERO however the word is defined. Definition is where power lives and if you have the power to define, such as naming your kids, you have power. You may not be EMPOWERED but for briefest of moments you have power even if it is just for 30-40 seconds which for many of us is a long time, especially with a world where attention spans have been reduced, eliminated and “cured” with medication.

I am no HERO but I do have a story outdated, obsolete and remote as it is.

I served in the Military for just under four years. It was, for me an awakening, eye opening and rewarding time which came when I needed something, I just didn’t know what.

I was stationed overseas for over three years and was briefly home for a week or two between assignments. After a couple of days home and with none of the neighborhood kids around I awaited my return to duty with eagerness.

This is not about my time in service but about my ONION Story of coming home.

Many of the guys with whom I was stationed talked about going home to parades, fanfare and celebration. I was fortunate to have access to a vehicle and drove many of my buddies to the airport as they prepared to return home. I listened to their stories of expectations and never knew if those expectations were realized.

All their stories made me think and plan for my return home. I figured I have one chance (not the rapper) at going home and I want to make it a bit different though I knew I was not alone is this desire.

Letters home and back to me never contained information about my impending return home. On my part this was intentional. For my family, they never asked. I knew they wanted to know but it would have to come from me. Their only hope was that I came home in one piece and alone just like at birth with 10 fingers and 10 toes. My family empowered me. I made the decision and choice not to tell them.

When time came I flew in a airplane (not on the airplane, thanks George for making us think) for what seemed like an eternity all along knowing my Military service was just about complete and it was time to move on.

After a 20 or so hour flight I arrived in The United States on the West Coast. It was about four PM local time. I was directed to a barracks for transient folks entering and leaving our country.

I laid on the bunk for a few hours but the energy and anticipation of the event made it difficult to sleep. Besides my scheduled flight across the country to the East Coast was set to depart around 11 PM so falling asleep at 4-5 PM was quite difficult sort of like trying to get kids to nap in nursery school at 10:30 in the morning. Even with warm milk and graham crackers there was no way I was going to sleep back then. Recess was better since I could run, yell, scream, holler, play with a ball, swing on the swings and let out all the energy sleep was supposed to diffuse. Wrong. Let’s get RECESS back in the schools and watch the kids reduce their anxiety and stress, eliminate the medications and focus and concentrate on their work even with all the electronic distractions.

At 11:30 PM the plane departed for the 6-7 hour non-stop flight home. Like most things in life, especially in modern times, waiting is a big part of the PROCESS. PROCESS has become a popular word: The PROCESS. Lets PROCESS. Know The PROCESS. Do you have anything you want/ need to PROCESS? Add it to the list of cliches from a previous BLOG Post.

In full uniform I arrived in my hometown airport. I gathered my “stuff” which consisted of a bulky cumbersome duffle bag, garment bag for uniforms so they would not get creased, though I don’t know why I did this since I would not be wearing them anytime soon and what was once called a “ditty bag” used for smaller stuff. I guess it is part of discipline and respect for the uniform and myself.

I labored to the outside and took a taxi from the airport to the subway, aka, The El short for elevated train or subway if you will. The train took me to the bus station where I took a bus to Dad’s office. By the way, I stood in the train watching as commuters hid their eyes and faces behind their morning newspapers. Nobody made eye contact, nobody offered a seat (which I would not have accepted because that is who I am, even today), nobody said hello, nobody said welcome home, nobody did anything which was and still is fine with me. All this is in direct contrast to what ONIONS are today. Times change. Impressions change. Opinions change).

Dad was Civilian Commander of the local Army Base. The bus let me off at the front gate where I proceed to sign in telling the guards my coming home story. The all knew The Chief, as Dad was known. I called Dads office in hopes that his secretary Mary, who I knew, from our days of visiting Dad at work though we spent most of the time at the swimming pool. Once dried off from the pool and changed into “civies” (civilian clothes) we always stopped by Dad’s office for visit and our ride home since Mom took my brother and I on two buses to get the Army Base. We loved seeing Dad but we enjoyed Mary since she always had a candy dish ready for our awaiting grasp which usually contained Mary Jane candy appropriately named for Mary. Mary did answer the phone and I told her of my arrival and to please not tell Dad I was there.

Back at the Main Gate Guard House a jeep arrived to transport me to Headquarters Office where Dad worked. My “stuff” stayed at the Guard House allowing for ease of movement.

I climbed the steps, opened the front door and entered the building. I was told Dad’s office was on the second floor. I got there and don’t remember if my feet touched the ground. I went around a corner through a doorway and saw Mary standing, holding her hands to her face (like the kids on television in the ONION) and she was crying. She pointed me to Dad’s office. When I got there I hugged the wall easing my way into the open door. I said, “Dad”. Dad picked his head up from his work and said “my son”. We hugged, embraced and shed a tear or two. We talked for a few minutes and then it was off to the mess hall, aka cafeteria, for breakfast with Dad and some of the guys. I knew Dad was proud even without his words, Dad’s smile could illuminate even the darkest of space, time and hour. I always called Dad “The Rock” because of his strength of character, priced, dignity and compassion. My Dad is my HERO and role model even though he is not with me.

After breakfast Dad gave me the keys to his car and told me to go find Mother. Here again I had no plan only to surprise Mom. Mom’s daily ritual and routine included a walk to the neighborhood stores to visit folks, get her hair done and buy dinner for that evening.

I parked the car in front of our home. The front door to our home was closed so I thought Mom may be occupied in the house. Wrong. The car keys included the house key and I entered our home, took a deep breath, felt the love and yelled for Mom. No response. Mom must be out at the neighbors or at the stores. I called my brother who lived about a mile away. He happened to be working from home well before today’s fashionable trendy world of tele-commnute, work from home and remote working arrangements. Within a few minutes he was home. We hugged, shook hands and simultaneously said lets find Mom. My brother drove his car as I was shotgun peering out the windows looking for Mom on her route to and from the neighborhood. No luck. I went into all the stores she patronized which were all of them. Mrs. Feldman at the bakery gave me a cookie. The deli where my brother and I both worked while in high school offered lunch, “Come sit down for a while and we’ll catch-up”. I told them I’ll be back in a day or two.

Brother and I got back in his car and headed home where we hoped Mom would be. Brother parked behind Dad’s car. From the street I saw Mom standing in the doorway behind the screen door with a troubling, puzzling and confused look on her face which I later learned was fear due to Dad’s car being home and he wasn’t.

I got out of brothers car, stood in the street and looked at Mom. She started to shake, tremble and cry holding onto the door safety bar. As I got closer I saw her face which pained me at first but relief came upon me as Mom opened the door, said nothing and held me like a newborn for what seemed like an eternity but was only a few minutes. Mom did not want to let go which she finally did since I told Mom with all this excitement I needed to go the bathroom.

We immediately went to the kitchen table, the hub, the universe, the center of our world, the statement of our home. Mom made tea, and of course a cookie or two, for the three of us and calm soon came upon us. The kitchen table where life was discussed, decisions were made, comfort was lived, feelings let out, meals were consumed, love was spread, homework was done and the table where the weekly Pinochle card game was played with its own cast of characters.

I was HOME. On my terms. My Definition. My Empowerment. My Decision. Not like most but for me it worked as is evident by the tears or is it The ONION?

The strength of a society and culture is family however it is defined for you.

Like most things in life you don’t miss it until you don’t have it.

 Is it just me? Can’t be!!!

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Manure Field. If you like what you read please spread the word about my BLOG to those in your personal, social and professional communities. If you don’t like what you read I apologize for my intrusion into your world.

About six months ago our kids bought us an electronic device which is activated by one of us loudly saying Hey______ and in an instant questions are answered, music plays and the weather is offered for our convenience since we, like most folks these days are too LAZY to go outside for a few seconds to check weather conditions. Is it longs and longs, longs and shorts, shorts and shorts, jackets, hats, gloves, scarves, boots or not? Wait just asked the device experts.

Speaking of the electronic device, there has been an increase in those annoying, interfering and untimely phone calls, human and not human or is that inhuman. Is it a coincidence or is it because we have the new electronic device that knows when we are sitting down to a meal (where we often have topical conversations not about other people and their stuff but more of an intellectual, cerebral and spirited dialogue amongst us), on the land line, which we still have or more significantly on our way to the bathroom.

It knows when we are eating, it knows when we’re at work, it knows when we don’t want talk to them and it is hard to be good for goodness sake. We better watch out. We won’t cry, yet. Something or somebody is out there, like the X-Files truth. I have a big brother and I know he is not watching but perhaps somebody’s brother or like kind figure, human or not, is.

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On a completely different topic, I have an update to a few of my previous BLOG Posts about kids of which, even at my advanced age, am proud to say,  I am one at least in spirit and heart not necessarily in abilities or technological knowledge. Remember, I still have and use a Flip-Phone!!!

The following has little, if any, relevance except that it all benefits kids. What follows is a statement about kids, learning and empowerment. It might be considered “out of the box thinking” but anyone who has ever worked with kids will understand and relate to the contents of this correspondence.

There are two unwritten and undocumented rules in business: Know Your Product, Know Your Customers. The same is true for education.

I know Kids and how they think, understand, learn, behave, respond and process the learning experience. Kids first. When you have their attention, trust and confidence they can be taught, guided, empowered, inspired and motivated to learn. When you listen to kids, rather than judge them, they are at the ready to proceed with learning and life in general.

PLAY. When PLAY is NOT in the plan the kids are being set up to meet with less success than those kids who are allowed, permitted and ENCOURAGED to PLAY. Many life lessons are learned on the field of play without yelling, screaming, hollering, badgering, annoying, embarrassing, parents in their space. Let the kids play. They know they need to PLAY. So please let kids PLAY!!!

The following is a brief list of Life Lessons Learned on the Field of PLAY:

Teamwork

Sharing

Compromise

Leadership

Responsibility

Accountability

Consequences

Conflict Resolution

Social Interaction

Communications

Organization

Time Management

Structure

Decision Making

Critical Thinking

Negotiations

Adjusting

Compromise

Behaviors

Respect

Fun

Silliness

Getting Dirty which is just great!!!

 One of the best teachers is the game of CHESS.

In addition to the Life Skills listed above CHESS teaches:
Strategy

Planning

Critical Thinking

Maneuvering

Quickness of Thought

Consequences

Focus

Concentration

Awareness

Patience

Surviving

Value (especially the Queen)

Controlling Emotions

Body Language Signals

Reaction

Closing the Game

Determination

Resiliency

Commitment

Fun

Teachers wear many hats and for many kids are a role model, parent, counselor, advisor, mentor and leader which actually is quite a burden and load for teachers to handle, manage and control. For many, that is why they are teachers because they get satisfaction, joy and reward by preparing the next generation for the challenges of the future. Keep in mind, there are just as many disappointments, frustrations and annoyances with teachers, however, most teachers will say that one success story far outweighs the many stories that are not as successful.

The basics of teaching: Know your stuff. Know your kids. It is that simple. Simple works best, which is why folks get along with me, since they like the simple things in life.

Empowerment: Kids love to be empowered and thoroughly enjoy actually doing the things they learned. Better yet watch as a kid teachers another kid what they have just learned. Kids become teachers to and for kids. WOW!!!

BOREDOM: When kids, and all people for that matter, are BORED nothing good happens. Not saying that kids have to be completely occupied and immersed in an activity all day every day. Just saying that kids need to have Things To Do To Fight BOREDOM, The Enemy Of Us All. By the way, a college research paper I completed over 40 years ago on Juvenile Delinquency (remember that label?) concluded that most negative, inappropriate and illegal behaviors occurred between the hours of school dismissal and midnight. Not much has changed except perhaps that the window has been expanded. The credentialed, certified and pedigreed experts have suggested many changes and alternative methods to teaching and behavior management and similar to fashion and hair styles most repeat themselves, with different jargon, over time. As with many things in life, the BASICS work. Perhaps, this is a good time to return to the BASICS rather than burdening the education professionals with yet another whimsical, research rich set of rules, regulations, encumbrances and failures.

G: Verb. Get Up Get Out Get Going. PLAY. PLAY. PLAY. PLAY is productive in so many ways and not just for kids

By the way, the three bold highlighted items just mentioned are titles of my three, as of yet, unpublished books so if anyone is reading this who can be of assistance in having my three books published please let me know at hamp73@gmail.com.

Keep away from the “SCREENS”!!! Telephones, Computers, Tablets, I-Pads, Televisions and whatever else distracts kids from being kids. They need to have electronic access which is an empowering tool but teach the kids that it is just one tool of many that can make them strong, prepared, enriched and enlightened.

Examples are always the best explanations so here goes:

First:

When our son was in summer day camp I would pick him up around noon. At home we would eat lunch and he would relax until 2 PM when he and I would ride bikes, swim or attempt to fish at the mud hole. This got old real fast and I knew I had to do something. I went back to the days of my youth. My wife and I got on the telephone and sent e-mails to the families of the kids from day camp who I knew were in town and probably struggling with the same boredom as my son and I. Our message was simple: Pick-up baseball at the park. Bring your glove, bat and water. The first day nine kids showed up and I did infield and batting practice with them. By the third day 26 kids showed up ranging in age from third to ninth grade. I appointed two kids as managers/captains. They had to choose teams fairly, make the batting order and assign field positions which were to be changed every inning or two so that each kid had the chance to play as many positions as desired. I did the pitching to keep the game moving. Kids came on foot, by bike, on scooters, and by car. Parents could stay or they could do whatever they had or wanted to do. I scheduled the game to go from 2-4 PM when parents would arrive to take their kids home. No one wanted to be first to take their kid home and many were the times that we played until 6 PM when I would take the initiative by shutting things down. The kids went home tired, hungry and ready for tomorrow. Often I would get calls at home from kids and parents wanting to know if the game was on for tomorrow. This is what kids should be doing. Playing without the yelling, screaming, hollering, structure, trophies, pictures and goodie bags. The kids were outdoors where they belong having fun, resolving their own issues, learning about life and just having fun at play. On the weekends if there was a game I let other Dads, who were busy during the week, get involved and be part of the action as I sat back and watched. At first they wanted to do everything but soon learned and were encouraged by me to back away and let the kids be kids. All those kids are now in college or working. When they around and we meet their first remarks are about the great time and fun they had playing “Pick-Up” baseball at the park and they always ask, “hey coach, game today”?

Second:

During the summer months I would take my 30 foot long jump rope to the park along with our two kids.

I would tie one end of the jump rope to a bench or tree while I took the other end and twirled the rope so the kids could do their jumping. The kept count and when they needed a break they would jump out get, some water, wipe their sweaty brows and jump back in.

As always the park was filled with kids most of whom were friendly with our kids. The other kids would come over to our jump rope spot and with a bit of curiosity watched for a few minutes and either they asked our kids if they could jump in or they would just look at me with a gesture or use their eyes to ask if they could jump in  All I  did was motion with my hand to jump in and jump in they did.

The kids were quite creative in their jumping. Some wanted to go it alone while others, after a few jumps by themselves, asked others to join them making a 2,3,4 and a few more kids jumping at the same time. I was so bold as to ask all the kids if they wanted to jump at the same time to see how many rotations they could. After multiple practice sessions I lined 22 kids in a single line all of varying ages and heights from 2nd graders to high school kids yes even high school age kids wanted to be part of the action.

The result of the kids’ tenacious efforts and my determination to have them achieve a goal was that those 22 kids managed to jump 18 consecutive rotations. Subsequently the same and even greater numbers were achieved. It was wonderful to see the older kids encourage the younger kids. By the way the younger kids in a family generally turn out to be the better athletes since they, the younger kids, are constantly playing with their siblings older friends.

Most of our jump rope evenings had a large number of kids jumping. Even more wonderful was number of “grown-ups” watching, (as grown-ups do these days and for the past generation or two), some even offering to turn the rope so I could get a drink for myself. It was quite heartwarming to see, especially the younger kids, run up to their parents yelling “I did it, I did it”.

A night of jump roping did not go by that most every grown-up, many of whom I knew from the school and local community, came to me and said “Thanks”.

The kids not only jumped rope they learned about themselves and what they could accomplish. They raised their confidence, awareness and self esteem. They learned that the big kids are fun to play with. They learned social skills. They learned patience waiting their turn to jump. They learned about life from PLAY.

Add to my narrative a ball to kick, bike to ride, hill to climb, puddle to splash in, tree to climb, swing to swing upon and all the other positive, healthy, productive, engaging fun things for kids to do and watch them excel in school.

The cynics, doubters and critics will rip apart my unsubstantiated, unprofessional and unworthy theory and process. That is fine with me.

When I was a kid I was taught: Those who can, do. Those who can’t, don’t and won’t merely talk. The talkers are experts knowledgeable in their field harnessing gathered data and transforming it into a rather substantial collection of research covering hundreds if not thousands of pages. Who reads, understands and uses the contents? Who can comprehend hundreds and thousands of pages of stuff such as The Federal Budget, The Mueller Report and The Mt. Laurel housing decision? Very few, if any, at all. But ask yourself, who can PLAY? EVERYBODY!!!

What Has Happened and Why Is it Happening?

Welcome to my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Mayhem with Manure. There will be mistakes in spelling, grammar, word usage, syntax whatever that is and other mistakes as well. Not to worry since mitsakes are a part of the human condition. I know, I know, we don’t want our doctors, mechanics, tradesmen/women, repairmen/women, accountants, lawyers and others to make mitsakes but they are human too. The difference is when a mitsake is made who owns it and more importantly who are those who make the corrections out of pride and quality and not a threat? Hey, e.e. cummings writes in all lower case most of the time. Perhaps it is quality and content rather than being like everyone else. By the way, I am no e.e.cummings or anyone else, just me.

And here we go!!!

After my family I LOVE Basketball. Even at my age with arthritis, plantar fasciitis, bent toes, bunions, wounded ankles, malfunctioning knees, sore hips and aches and pains most everywhere I still manage to gimp around the basketball floor contributing the little I can by doing things that do not require skills that I never actually had.

I am the consummate lunch box, blue collar, working guy who sets screens, grabs an occasional rebound or two, hustles for the lose ball and plays defense. The guys are kind to the old and feeble and let me play even when I do bring a ball. I have my aches and pains but the pain of not playing is far worse than any pain I have learned to endure.

I coached our sons recreational basketball team when he was in the lower school grades. One year, since nobody wanted to do it I was League Commissioner which was a great gig except for those annoying, overbearing, rude, crude, yelling, screaming, hollering and badgering parents who behaved this way towards their kids at games and probably at home as well. No wonder so many kids are taking multiple medications for things that ail them. Too bad there is no cure for bad parenting.

I think it was during 6th grade. Our team was ousted in the tournament in the first game. When it was time for the championship game my son and I went the gym where he met up with and sat with his buddies. I, too, found a small group of guys with whom to watch and enjoy the game. One of my guys was the Dad of a player we have known for many years so naturally I was rooting for his team.

To make a long story longer The dad’s sons team lost. We were standing at the opposite end of a filled gym from where the players were leaving the plating area. Without hesitation after the whistle ended the game this Dad yelled across the packed gym telling his to hurry up, get his stuff and meet the Dad at the side entrance to the gym. Without hesitation the son yelled back to his Dad, “okay Dad but first i have to get my trophy”. The Dad exploded and went into a screaming frenzy saying, “you lost, you don’t get a trophy for losing. Lets get out of here”.

The stunned crowd went silent and a few parents quickly exited the arena. However most stayed and milled around discussing the scene and expressing their approval of the Dad’s commentary to his son.

That was about twelve years ago. Most certainly all have recovered and forgotten the event.

EXAMPLE: Around this same time our son’s school basketball team was playing their neighboring rival. It is sort of a big deal bragging rights game. Our son’s team had 10 players and all played even just a little. Their rival team had 35 kids on the team and only 7-8 kids played mostly all of the game. NOBODY GOT CUT FROM THE TEAM. Everybody made the team, got a uniform paid for by the parents) a team picture, a certificate of participation, post game snacks, goodie bags and of course invites to all those pasta parties and sleepovers, maybe even a trophy. How much of this stuff do still have decorating your room, basement or cave.

Now, how is this relevant to today. This is March Madness, the absolute best sporting season of the year, for me and many others, not necessarily you which is just fine. This past weekend I was glued to the tube, do they still use tubes? Anyway there were four of the most competitive, exciting, thrilling display of skills from the players to the coaches and everyone in between. The television game announcers got caught up in the Magic of March Madness.

As always happens the team that scores at least one more point wins the game. I am not a gambler but that is an easy win if there is anybody who would take action.

What is saw this past weekend was a group of young, talented, skilled, good guys reduced to tears because they and their team did not win which was, of course expected. What is not expected and kids may not be taught that there are times in life when you will not win whihc is called losing. With all the pampering, hype, fame, glory, glamor, chest bumps, constant hand touching sort of like a high five only lower especially at and during the free throw shooting choreographed ritual, stimulation, notoriety, reputation, image, expectations and dreams.

These larger than life outstanding young men, worshiped by kids, fans, media, sporting goods companies, agents, managers, marketing gurus, lawyers and leagues who see dollar signs flashing like Fourth of July Fireworks are reduced to tears hiding their faces in towels on national television in the spotlight with cameras affixed on their condition avoiding any privacy the kids may need or want to gather themselves before the parade to the podium where the victors are heralded and the losing team kids and coaches listen and respond ,with poise and grace, to awkwardly posed questions by a noisy media in very low unemotional voices, who hinges on every word the kid says waiting for a mistake or is it a misspoken moment as it is with the highly educated, worldly traveled, cultured and privileged small community. I hope the crying kids have an opportunity to let it all out in private without judgement, blame and criticism so they can regain their composure, spirit and just themselves. Maybe and hopefully the families in attendance are the ones to seek for consolation, a hug and of course The Love.

We are ripe for takeover. We are fat, obese, lazy, weak, apathetic, becoming more and more under educated except for the newest phone, computer and video game, remotely distant and uninvolved, in constant need of instant gratification, affirmations, nurturing and praise, electronically dependent, addicted to everything, legally drugged for every condition and ailment, illegally drugged to hide the pain and fight hopelessness, with nothing in moderation as the experts tell us we need which is what our parents told us though they were not experts.

Red ink indicates a kid did not do well on an assignment or exam. I hope schools do not use red ink. It is like white coat syndrome at the doctors office. See how they have changed. Lots of bright, subdued and calming colors so the blood pressure stays manageable and not in need of medications that are now being exposed as more dangerous that the condition they are suppose to be treating.

Learning comes from making a mistake. Ask anyone who cooks especially parents juggling all their kids stuff. Some nights dinner will not be as good as eating at the restaurant and that is simply okay. It is only a mistake if you do not learn from the mistake whihc is why it is called learning. It’s like losing. You have to lose and fail so that you can appreciate and graciously accept success, victory and wins.

How do you know what is good if you never have experienced bad. Your life is perfect with money, clothes, cars vacations and all the other success indicators. What happens and how to handle yourself when you wake up in the morning look in the mirror and see a cluster of facial pimples and maybe a few on your shoulders and back. Are you staying in bed all day or will you face the world imperfections and all. Test your character and make a decision especially one that offers you a chance to win and feel good about yourself.

Barcelona has its Ramblas which allows folks to leisurely stroll through an unimpeded path lined with vendors, restaurants, street folks and tourists all on a mission of something or maybe nothing at all

So this manure is myRambling with a purpose for me and maybe nothing at all for the audience except for the chance to chuckle and think about some things heretofore not given much attention.

Random Thoughts on a Soon to be Shoveled Snowy Saturday

Welcome to another one of Marty’s Mound of Manure Mentions from my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary Global Neighborhood of Manure.

Today’s message can be considered tidbits of useless information from my vast warehouse and storage facility.

In addition to shoveling some snow this Manure sample can be considered a bit of shoveling as well, manure that is!!!

If Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence and Pete fell off, who’d be left?

If Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence and Pete fell off, who’d be left?

If Pete and Repeat were siting on a fence and Pete fell off, who’d be left?

Get it?

Like a Penguin with Happy Feet

On the Street

Out to Trick or Treat

Moving forward, never to RETREAT.

Do I need to Repeat

Or is it time to click DELETE?

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If you had three wishes and used the first two, what would your third wish be?

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Three things have been happening for decades that are indicators that society is changing which can be good, however the following three things are a bit more hostile and volatile:

1. Language is in the “binjo” ( translate for urban Tagalog). We just don’t care what comes out of our mouths. Even George’s seven words are part of our everyday lexicon. Tis a shame. I am no saint but, after all, there once was a time and place (locker rooms, street corners,  neighborhood places to indulge in spirits, social clubs which were exclusive, oops I mean exclusionary like non-public golf clubs not golf clubs but the golf “club” itself) to use the various, formerly considered profane words to express our feelings and emotions to temporarily shock the world.

2. The gap between those with and those not with or “without” is widening as quickly as the icebergs are breaking apart and just as serious and dangerous to society.

3. No Trust in Leadership at all levels from small businesses to the big folks. Too many “TOXIC” workplace environments.

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I never remember anything I forget nor do I forget anything I remember.

It is not good to eat or drink on an empty stomach.

In order to get there first you must leave.

I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.

When you forgive someone you give them permission to do it again.

I might not be the first to offer these Franklin like wisdom words but at least they are in one place for you to use to amuse yourself and others if you so choose to use them as “ice-breakers” during awkward business and social encounters.

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The purpose of SOCIAL MEDIA:

Look at ME!!!

Look at ME!!!

Look at ME!!!

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Most know their RIGHTS, but who knows their RESPONSIBILITIES?

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Is everything we read on the Internet actually TRUE?

You read a story, then go to a hoax, myth or legend site to verify truth or falsehood. It’s like taking opioids which constipate you so the opioid folks make another pill to let it flow, let it flow, let it flow, like today’s and Christmas, oops I apologize I should have written Holiday time, don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Don’t forgive me since I may do it again. Time let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

If the TRUTH will set you FREE then why are there so many shackled, restricted and restrained. Perhaps we really can’t handle the truth. Oh those writers a re sooooooooooooo smart, intelligent, wise and maybe a bit lucky. Maybe we have been brainwashed to be certain we don’t hurt anyone’s feelings and if we do, well, just offer sincerest apologizes along with some thoughts and prayers which are amazing!!!

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Enough for now. Here I have shoveled some of my stuff and now it is time to actually shovel the fallen snow.

The ANSWER or is it a SOLUTION?

Welcome to my Limited By Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary, Messy from too much Manure. Be open and accepting on the unintentional mistakes that are embedded somewhere in the following narrative. Let the experts proofread. I am human. I make mistakes. I learn form failure, losing and mistakes. It builds character and if you ask folks who know me they will tell you I am a character just not sure what kind. I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.

The ANSWER is not blowing in the wind nor is it Alan Iverson who played college basketball at Georgetown and Professionally in Philadelphia for the 76ers.

Pound for pound Mr. Iverson was the most skilled, talented, dynamic, courageous, determined, relentless, resilient, exciting and thrilling basketball player to ever wear his uniform.  Watching him play the way he played the game he loves, the way it is supposed to be played, provided pleasure, enjoyment and excitement for most of us who live lives of quiet desperation though Mr. Iverson has made it known about his personal struggles which makes him human just like you and me except on the basketball floor where he lives out our dreams just like all artists do. To have Mr. Iversons passion for the game is not work but more of serious play.

The best source for ANSWERS to most any topic is to seek out the professional assistance of a Reference Librarian. They are the smartest people on the planet and probably beyond as well. Referees Librarians do not and cannot have all the ANSWERS, however, Reference Librarians KNOW WHERE TO LOCATE, FIND AND RETRIEVE THE ANSWERS!!!

Reference Librarians will give you all the information out there about “Blowin’ In The Wind” by Dylan or Peter, Paul and Mary, et. al. and Mr. Iverson as well.

What does “all of the above”, usually reserved for those dreadful standardized tests answer choices which I hated as I loathe all Standardized Tests since I do not test well thus unleveling (not unlevening) the level field, have to do with anything. NOTHING, except I have THE ANSWER for a multiple century old crisis in our country.

First, I will list a few songs that are cross cultural especially on the RACE Issue:

EXAMPLES are the explanations.

Most of the following EXAMPLES blend beauty from the heart and soul of African American and White artists. Remember we must always thank the ARTIST for letting us VISIT the place where they live ’cause most of us, the overwhelming majority of us cannot get there without their leadership, guidance, inspiration, motivation, invite and permission.

Some of you older folks will know and understand “Blue Eyed Soul”. For the younger folks ask your grandparents.

All of the following EXAMPLES can be found and listened to on YOUTUBE.

EXAMPLE: The Pointer Sisters: 2002 I’m So excited. They sing accompanied by a symphony. Spectacular. Note the symphony, as well, as the thousands in the audience are White similar to many professional American Sporting Events that find most of the participants African American while those in attendance, as well as, ownership are White. I am not a data statistics guy but more of an observer like Seinfeld.

EXAMPLE: Joe Cocker singer Unchain My Heart again 2002 maybe not a coincidence with The Pointer Sisters. Anyway feel the Energy, Spirit, Heart, Soul and LOVE as Mr. Cocker sings with his raspy voice accompanied by African American and White talented Musicians and Singers. The cameras add to the mood.

EXAMPLE: Michael McDonald (Doobie Brothers) and James Ingram team up, in 1983, to enlighten us with their spiritual and moving son Ya Mo Be There. The richness and range in their voices just make you feel good. the message is POWERFUL if you listen closely. You are NOT Alone.

EXAMPLE: Steve Winwood “Roll With It” 1988. You must feel the music, glide and slide with the words, even Roll with the lyrics. The music, setting and sound will lift your spirits and energize you soul Blue Eyed or not.

EXAMPLE: Carlos Santana around 70 years old and Chad Kroger, maybe 35 years old joining talents singing “Into the Night”. Feel the energy, passion and spirit of the music, performers and dancers. Look at those happy faces. This could and SHOULD be you, me, and everyone.

EXAMPLE: The Commitments 1991 Movie and Band of passionate, emotion evoking and lively artists who sing a variety of songs with heart, soul Blue-Eyed and not, energy and COMMITMENT.

EXAMPLE: The MOTOWN sound of the 1960’s and beyond blended with the Movie / Musical Play of HAIRSPRAY. The RACES briefly become one through music, dance, emotion, love, creativity, understanding and compassion with a heavy dose of a reality check from those who have FEAR in their lives.

Most certainly there are more EXAMPLES but if you have not realized it by now, from reading my BLOG POSTS, I am somewhat limited. The only thing I can count on are my fingers. The only thing I know is what works which is why I am ending this BLOG POST with a repeat of my true, factual and historical story that occurred about 50 years ago. It is more relevant today than it was back then based on the multiple recent events in our country.

Remember simple works best which is why folks get along with me, they like the simple things in life, especially music that delivers universal messages of hope, understanding, compassion and FUN.

Here is my repeat but worth another read: This is my answer which I know works because of its simplicity. Skeptics, doubters and cynics will disagree but that is what they do for everything. What a miserable existence. I know those folks go through life regularly CONSTIPATED which is quite irregular don’t you think.

Race – Culture- Diversity – Inclusion – Empowerment – Leadership – Success

In 1969 my first assignment after basic training and schooling was at The United States Air Force Clark Air Base in The Philippines. After a twenty six hour flight, with a few stops along the journey, I arrived on my 19^th birthday, took a walk around the base and followed towering lights that illuminated a football practice field. Leaning up against a fence I watched until the end of practice and found one of the coaches to whom I spoke about my desire to play. He told me to come back tomorrow night at 7 PM which I did. That resulted in me being given a practice uniform which I used the following night. I was lucky to be stationed in The Philippines where, in addition to being a beautiful country with wonderful people, music, customs, traditions, folklore, history, culture and FOOD, I had the opportunity to learn, grow and prosper with education, awareness and knowledge not available in the traditional learning environment.

I planted myself on the defensive line where I stayed, started and played for two seasons making the all-star team both years. My life at Clark was filled with work, football, cards in the barracks on paydays. a bit of sightseeing and on occasion a visit to Angeles City for a San Miguel, food, music and participation in cultural and social activities. For many GI’s it was the chance to do things that were just reaching the middle class in America and which have always existed in the lower and upper class of the economic strata. Given the chance to go back guys would be lined up for miles to return to indulge in pleasures they probably never told anyone outside of those who had similar experiences.

The best part of my entire two seasons was that I was the only White guy on the starting defensive team which was quite spectacular for many reasons. Before each game we would change into our uniforms in a “hut” near the field. As we were changing a bottle of Thunderbird (what’s the word Thunderbird, what’s the price .60 twice) was being passed around by the starting defensive players, of which I was one as previously mentioned. The bottle came to me. All my teammates’ eyes were on me and with their eyes they were saying “Will he”? Without hesitation I lifted the bottle to my mouth and downed a big swig of T-Bird. The guys all cheered and we “high-fived” each other in brotherhood. We had two winning seasons and a few of us made the All-Star Team. We saw no color except our green uniform jerseys. We lived, worked, played and socialized together.  I miss the guys who often told me that “I had more soul than I could control”.  My life was enhanced, enriched and enlightened from the times I spent with the all the guys Black, White and everyone else.

The barracks in which I lived had been integrated the year before I arrived at Clark. Before this, the Black guys lived in remote barracks on the fringes of the base. I never saw where they lived but some of the old timers told me stories about the conditions.

My barracks was filled with Blacks, Whites, Islanders, Hispanics and two Jews of which I was one. We never had a problem. Even the guys from the South publicly adjusted to showering and sharing bathroom facilities and dining halls with guys unlike them. In private, though, their stories were quite inflammatory but they never let their emotions deter from their job performance and co-habitation with guys with whom they had nothing good to say.

In the integrated barracks next to mine there were Black Panther meetings several times a week.  Only the Black guys went and they did not allow their attitudes, feelings, emotions and everything else spread to the public community.

I may be naïve, stupid, ignorant, unaware or just plain old dumb but I never heard about of any violence, property damage or physical altercations during my 18 months on base at Clark.

There was an active and profitable Black Market at Clark which was NOT named Black Market because only Black guys were involved. Free Enterprise, Business is Business. For those involved the only color was Green as it is today. We had cigarette and liquor ration vouchers which a few entrepreneurial and enterprising guys used for profit by servicing their customers since in all businesses without customers to service you have no business.

Now customer disservice has trumped customer service and has become more of a customer self service and call 1-800-000-000 if you have a problem, issue or concern. (By the way, when calling 1-800 and prompted to press “1” for English only to wait forever to speak with a human, press “2” for Spanish since all the customer service folks speak English). One would sell their ration vouchers for a fixed price to the guys taking the risk and those guys would deliver the goods off base to downtown contacts who would sell the products to locals who were in the distribution business. Black Market Business just might be the second oldest profession.

Downtown Angles City was a divided town. Right outside the main gate was known as The Strip where anybody could roam the streets, participate in various offerings, indulge in the street food, and ride in a beautifully decorated Jeep leftover from MacArthur during World War II.

A couple of miles from the Strip was The Block where only the Black guys could congregate for their social interactions. It was well known by all non-Black guys that one did not venture down on The Block since many incidents occurred to those who visited who were not part of the community and culture. Twice I went down on The Block. Both times escorted by my football Black teammates who insured my safety and well being. While walking the streets, eating and drinking I was watched, visually screened and made to feel quite uncomfortable and unsafe by those Americans and locals who did not know my identity. Several times the table I was at with my Black Teammates was approached and my Black Teammates had to explain me. This is probably how Blacks feel when they walk around a store followed by staring eyes waiting for something to happen or Blacks who drive through neighborhoods unlike where they live as they face the onslaught of looks, doubt, concern, worry and fear from the locals.

Clark had a movie theater. I went a few times but couldn’t tell you what was showing. I do remember that it was custom, tradition and mandatory to stand at “attention” while the National Anthem was being played. The only guys who did not stand were the Black guys so please do not consider the 2017 protests as something new. Though I did feel awkward and a bit confused from my lack of knowledge I did understand after a few of my Black Teammates explained their plight and provided reasons for their non-involvement in the pre-movie ceremony. They all told me that until I walk in their shoes please do not pass judgment. A little knowledge, insight and wisdom go a long way to understanding. By the way, this was around the same time as the Black Comedy (nothing racial about Black Comedy, Black Ice or Black Friday) movie “MASH” was circulating. It was banned by the leadership at Clark because of its insubordination and inappropriate content which may have caused and influenced behaviors, attitudes and values to change since through the magic words of comedy, satire and mockery rests truth. And we all know truth should set us free but in today’s world it continues to hide and be hidden through manipulated obfuscation.

So, what does all this have to do with anything? Nothing much, if anything, at all. Only, perhaps, if we knew just a little about history, listen twice as much as we speak (two ears, one mouth, get it) and understood our own world we may just have the ability to focus on the important matters such as family, health, education, work, empowerment, critical thinking, communications, understanding, compassion, leadership, life-style, play, fun, laughter and everything else that has become an impediment to our society, culture and overall safety and well being.

By the way, the next time a Charlottesville event is scheduled anywhere in our country let’s have folks bring all the foods of their culture, nationality, ethnicity, religion and race and let the eating begin. Even those filled with hate will enjoy a good meal and leave wanting more of all that good stuff made, with LOVE, by those who they so ignorantly hate.

My solutions are all simple. Simple always works best. This is why folks get along with me since they like the simple things in life. Simply put: excuses explain failure while REASONS define SUCCESS.

Thanks for reading my story.

Unite and Conquer instead of divide and conquer.

Live in PEACE rather than rest in PEACE.

Nobody more SIMPLE, Nobody more Real than ME and perhaps you!!!

How Many Times……………….

Time for more stuff from my vast warehouse and storage facility of tidbits of useless information, as are all entries in Marty’s Mindless Mound of Manure!!!

It all comes to you from my Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary and here is, yet, another sample of proof.

How many times do we need to be told, encouraged and informed?

How to cook a Thanksgiving Turkey? Just call 1-800 and our experts will make you an expert. Hang around home long enough to learn something so you can offer your insight, wisdom and knowledge to the next generation.

Diet and exercise are the keys to weight loss management and control.

Education is vital to success though the modern world is beginning to understand that college is not for everybody. We need folks who can build, make, do, create with their hands as well as their minds.

College is a euphemism for DEBT. Why are kids and their families encouraged to incur debt.

After high school graduation a year or two away from formal education will build character, teach life skills and prepare kids well beyond any classroom “learning” environment.

Play, unstructured PLAY, void of yelling, screaming, hollering, harassing and badgering parents (grown-ups?) without uniforms, trophies, goodie bags, snacks, team pictures and all the costly right gear, is a Good, check that, a GREAT thing for kids while in school, after school, on the weekends and during school breaks. Maybe the ADD/ADHD will disappear as abruptly as it has “medically been prescribed to appear”.

Having 500++++++ social media “friends” is not a good thing since loneliness is everything it is cracked up to be. All those “friends” and nobody to talk with, listen to me or have lunch with.

BINGE -BINGE – BINGE. There goes another day with no human interaction expect for my daily dose of trendy coffee.

Take Out – Take Out and more Take Out results in PUT ON – PUT ON -PUT ON. Alas yet another excuse (not reason) to go clothes shopping. One size up please. Oooops time to buy a membership at the newest, latest, hot gym.

Everything in MODERATION.

I keep meaning to join the procrastinators club but I keep putting it off.

Everything is GREAT  – SPECTACULAR – WONDERFUL – “AMAZING” until it is NOT.

Nobody has your back but YOU!!!

It’s easy. It’s simple. No problem. “If I can do it so can you”. Oh really. Just like when receiving driving directions inevitably the person giving the directions says: “You can’t miss it”. I miss it.  Even GPS makes mistakes or haven’t you experienced this yet?

Let me be honest with you. OR Let me be PERFECTLY honest with you. Uh oh. What have I been told prior to being told that the speaker is NOW, all of a sudden, going to honest or PERFECTLY honest with me. What should I do with all the stuff I was told prior to this update about HONESTY.

Celebrate any accomplishment. For some it is everything they do that is believed to justify attention, affirmation and recognition. LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME.

I’ve got more but it is time to get dinner ready. Now where is that 1-800 number?

Random”Stuff”

Welcome to Marty’s MindlessMound of Manure which is Limited by Truth and Facts Serious and Silly Civil Community of Common Commentary.

If you like what you read and I make you think, laugh and smile then I did something good for you so why not do the same for those in your world by sharing my stuff with them!!!

When our kids were in elementary school field trips to the zoo, nature preserves and parks occurred one or twice a year.

Prior to the years when doing so would embarrass the kids, I volunteered to a tag-a-long parent accompanying the kids and staff on their journeys. I would never do this once they reached middle school age but as elementary school students it was still “fun” to have Mom or Dad be part of the occasion.

My first field trip found us gathering at the school about 7:30 in the morning. The kids were excited for the days travel and for most it was their first visit to a zoo.

The commotion at the school leading up to boarding the bus, equipped the all important bathroom, was quite startling. Clinging parents filling the backpacks with snacks, tissues and and extra inhaler, hugging and kissing their kids goodby as the parents shed a few tears which I always thought were tears of joy freeing the parents for the day to do whatever they do while their kids are learning their ABC’s and 123’s, socially interacting and learning life skills at the same time and let’s not forget the time spent in front of a screen. Alas, the screen.

This story occurred about twenty years ago as technology was in the beginning stages of what has become all consuming. Screens – Screens – Screens and MORE Screens. I screen. You screen. We all need, must have and cannot exist without our beloved SCREENS. It’s enough to make you SCREAM.

As the kids and chaperones got in the bus, not ON the bus, teachers were guiding the kids to their seats making sure that this kid can’t sit next to, near or anywhere close to that kid and making other similar accommodations to eliminate any possibility of hurting someone’s feelings. There was the expected and usual noise, chatter and tears from a few who cried at most anything.

The bus is getting ready for departure. Everyone is seated. Wait a minute. Time to buckle up. Oh we can’t since the bus does not have seat belts. How can this be? So much for consistency. Yet another mixed message just what kids need. Don’t smoke. Don’t drink? Don’t do drugs. Okay say the kids. But wait. Where is Ms./Mrs./Mr.__________. Oh the kids are told, Ms./Mrs./Mr.__________ is sick today and will not be going on the trip with. In fact Ms./Mrs./Mr.____________ failed the random drug test, has smokers cough and is drying out from a binge drinking weekend with college “friends”. Oh those mixed messages.

The bus is on its way with us somewhat safely secured inside yet there is still some restlessness on the part of the kids. Ah, the wisdom of experience. One of the elder teachers was prepared and brought along several VHS Movies which once inserted and “PLAY” was pushed quieted the crowd for the one and a half hour ride to the destination. It was calm, controlled and a comfort like macaroni and cheese, grilled cheese with tomato soup or your “jammies” and fuzzy slippers.

We had a fun, educational, eye opening day at the zoo.

For the bus ride back to school yet a different movie was used to calm and soothe the spirited and energized kids. Within fifteen minutes of departure from the zoo QUIET filled the air as all the kids, save one or two, were asleep exhausted from the fresh air, running around the somewhat open areas and in general having fun which is a missing ingredient in school, in fact, in the lives of most folks. Sad isn’t it. NO FUN. NO PLAY. Just MEDICATE the kids and they will calm down behave, perform, stay on task, focus and concentrate but in the long run pay the price of popping a pill to control and manage behavior, attitude, performance and PAIN which prior to all this they never knew they had. Screens with their savers, not saviors as advertised, continue to erode the fiber of ones self, ones being, ones soul and life in general.

Yes I know I am a hypocrite since if it were not for the screen upon which I am looking and writing my commentary mess I would have no way of making my message available to the masses, if in fact anyone ever reads my stuff.

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Have you noticed the degreed, credentialed, certified, licensed experts who have all the answers for parenting, education, relationships, morals, ethics, making millions from your home computer, weight loss, exercise, dieting and all the other trendy topics thrust into our world are single, childless, heirs, fat, lonely, abusive, liars, frauds, cheats, scammers, hustlers bellowing their venom pointing their pointer finger at us as they point three fingers at themselves and who have never spent a day in the classroom but know how it “SHOULD” be done. Their claim to fame is their genius until they get caught. Everything is wonderful until it is not. Everyone is a winner until they lose. Everyone is THE BEST until they are not. Everyone is believable, honest, trustworthy, loyal, dedicated and respectful until they are not. Everyone is everything until the TRUTH comes out. Then they are NOT.

This is where I usually provide EXAMPLES which if you have been reading my BLOG Posts know, are the best EXPLANATIONS. No need to this here since all you have to do is find a screen which will undoubtedly provide you more than enough examples of this brief narrative.

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There are two kinds of folks. Those in Recovery. Those in Prevention

EXAMPLE: Always the best form of PROOF.

There are two people. Person A. person B.

Person A has a heart attack and goes to the doctor who tells Person A:

Quit smoking. Eat a healthy diet. Exercise. Lose 50 pounds. Quit alcohol beverage consumption.

Person A takes the doctor’s advice. Person A joins a reputable, until they are not, gym.

While walking on the treadmill Person A reluctantly and hesitatingly begins a conversation with Person B who is also walking on the treadmill. No screens to watch. No buds in the ears. No headphones for distraction. Oh my goodness what shall be done. Oh well, though it is old fashioned and in person face to face conversation is frowned upon in fact avoided since we have all this a-social media at our disposal human interaction and conversation is an underused vehicle to help pass the time on the boring treadmill.

Person Asks Person B “what are you doing here. Well says Person B (just like President Regan who began most every response with a turn of the head,eyes looking down with the first utterance of “Well” preceding his answer).

Person B tells person A that he, Person “B” comes to the gym 4-5 times per week for a 1-2 two hour workout including cardio, free weights, yoga and a mile swim. “Been doing this for 40 years says person “B” explaining that he Person “B” wants to PREVENT health failures so he does not drink alcohol, gave up smoking before high school graduation, eats a healthy diet as recommended by the gym nutritionist, reluctantly ingests only prescription medications and plans his day around healthy and right living.

Person “B” asks Person “A’: “What’s your story”?

Person A proceeds to tell Person “B” his, Person “A’s story and lifestyle conditions that resulted in Person “A’s” heart attack and membership at the gym all at the suggestion of person “A’s” doctor/s.

Person “A” is in RECOVERY.

Person “B” is in PREVENTION.

When will all The Person “A’s” out there get it or will they, in fact, ever until it is too late causing the biggest of the biggest onions for their families.

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Come on. Admit it. You watch and love the highlights. Top Ten. Top any number as long it is just the highlights and not all the filler. It’s just another numbers game.

In baseball a player who gets 20 hits out of 100 at bat opportunities is relatively unknown while a player who gets 30 hits out of 100 at bat opportunities win awards and will eventually be selected into the baseball Hall of Fame. In fact in today’s hurry up world announcers and media folks often refer to a player, in most any sport, as being a future Hall of Famer when that particular player is playing in his fifth season of competition. Hurry up. You’re six months old. Poop in the toilet, clean yourself, dress yourself and look at a SCREEN. Slow down folks. Enjoy life. The ride can be FUN if you let it.

In the highlights all the shots go in the basket, the ball finds the back of the net, the puck gets past the goalie and so on. Well, (thank you president Regan) life is not like that. The only way to succeed is to fail but screens do not like to show failures unless of course it is of catastrophic proportion like natural disasters, violence and crime which instills fear in the audience causing stress, depression, anxiety and visits to the doctor to get pain medication prescriptions eventually blaming the doctor for what ails ya. Always find somebody to blame rather than taking responsibility yourself. See the pattern and cycle here. Vicious and Wicked isn’t it?

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Kind of serious today. Must end with a laugh, chuckle, giggle and smile.

EXAMPLE:

Like a Penguin with Happy feet

Especially when its October and time for trick or treat

Moving to the drum with a different beat

Gotta work hard, there is no easy street after all it is concrete

Always move forward never retreat

Gotta learn how to take the heat

Need I repeat

You no like, just hit delete!!!

Example: This is What We Have Done to Our Kids

More from Marty’s Mindless Mound of Manure

Have you done this “to” and not with / for your kids?

Have you heard this harmful utterance bellowed every time a kid does something, anything?

You know you have, please stop.

Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good Job Good job Good Job Good Job Good Job

And Sooooooooooooooooo On, Ad Infinitum and more significantly Ad Nauseum!!!

Break The Cycle-Break The Cycle-Break The Cycle-Break-The Cycle-Break the Cycle

Everything kids do is NOT, repeat, NOT deserving and worthy of a Good Job. Sometimes, yes even your gifted, talented, creative, athletic, artistic kid does something that IS NOT a Good Job. That is when learning takes place not from Good Job but from failure. Oh I apologize for using Failure since it has been erased from the dictionary of telling the truth.

Sooner or later, preferably sooner, kids who become adults must learn that need to EARN things in life not be given, entitled and praised for all they do or try to do. Failure is only a failure when learning does not take place. kids can’t do this which is why they have parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, elders, teachers, coaches, clergy, bosses, mentors, sponsors who can lead, guide, direct, motivate, inspire, correct, discipline and hold kids/ adults accountable and responsible. Kids/Adults know their rights but not their responsibilities.

If you are reader of my BLOG you know it is not very good especially since I am limited by the truth and facts. However, knowing it is not very good I continue to write my stuff mostly for myself and hopefully for one or two out there who understand my messages.

Rid the Good Job cliché.

Be honest, truthful, delicate, sensitive, compassionate and most importantly tactful when telling someone that, hey, this is not a Good Job but you can make it a good job with some “WORK”.

Work is GOOD. It builds character, teaches respect for the dollar earned so kids can spend their own twenty dollars for a movie that will be on television, somewhere, in a few weeks and best of all work by putting folks in an interacting, engaging social environment where they can talk, listen, observe and learn the nuances of being human instead of having electronics, social media and screens do it for them. We have become an a-social society with 500 :friends” on social media and nobody to talk to or more importantly listen.

Perfect does not exist and I am proof of this. You can tell by doing a Good Job of finding and pointing out my mistakes which many like to do mostly for their own pleasure. Everyone is a critic. Critics usually talk and not do. Folks know their rights, but, often, not their responsibilities.

It is TRUE, History Does Repeat Itself

Yes, History repeats itself and I am providing proof, actually an EXAMPLE, from Marty’s Mindless Manure Mound which is a good way to honor, acknowledge and respect Election Day. This is not a political statement in any way just a Serious, not too Silly, Story from my Civil Community of Common Commentary.

In May 1977 I graduated college and obtained my teaching certificate as well.

Two days after graduation I accepted a six week substitute teaching assignment in an inner city urban high risk neighborhood. In fact it was the same neighborhood where my Dad and his family lived, worked and went to school. When my Dad and his brothers attended this high school it had an excellent reputation for academics, attendance, athletics and all the other good things schools offered two generations ago.

Since my car was in the shop Dad took me to my first day of work at his former school. When he turned the corner to enter the parking lot he sighed with an, “oh my, look at what has happened to my school”. It had been 35 years since Dad was in the neighborhood and much had changed with the school building and parking lot all in dis-repair, unpaved streets approaching the school and abandoned row houses in need of everything. Dad told me it was always a rough rugged neighborhood but was disappointed to see his old neighborhood in such a blighted condition.

Dad went off to work as I entered the building searching for the school office. I found the office with ease being directed by a security guard. Once in the office I introduced myself and stated my purpose for being there to the secretary. I was given an attendance book which listed all the kids I would be teaching each class period of the day. Nothing else. Prior to the kids arriving to class I managed to scrounge some worksheets and pencils from other teachers just to get me through the day. During lunch I went to the office and asked for books, paper and supplies and was told there was some old books but for paper and supplies I was on my own.

The school day consisted of most all the kids arriving for homeroom and first period. By third period which was around 10:30 AM the population greatly reduced to single digit numbers from the class roster of between 20 -25 student per class. Once the kids ate, played with their mid-morning snack/ lunch or had food fights with the raisins there was not much reason for them to hang around in class. Off they went to destinations unbeknownst to me. The afternoon classes were occupied by one or two students at the most. Later I found out for many of the kids the mid-day snack might be the only food they eat for the day.

When the bell rang ending the last period of the day I gathered my “stuff”. By the way, I went to the school where I did my student teaching and knowing my mentor quite well professionally asked for paper and supplies which were graciously given to me. I had enough to make it until the last day of school. Actually I did not need much since there were not many kids in class.

At the office and prior to leaving for the day I had to turn in the attendance book to the secretary, who was responsible for maintaining such records which, I did. As I was exiting the school office I heard a “young man, can I see you for a minute”. I obliged and was asked what is this that I am handing in to her. I said it is the attendance book for each class for this day. She said, no it is not. You are wrong. I asked what she meant by telling me I am wrong? She told me that all the kids were in all the classes all day. I told her they were not and my attendance records indicated who was present and who was absent. She told me I was inaccurate with my reporting attendance and that I had to change the records to reflect her request of having every kid attend every class all day.

I told her that just last week I graduated college and earned my teaching certificate as well and I would not put myself and my earned documents in jeopardy. She told me I must comply or else. I asked or else what? She said. “You’ll see”. Just then a woman appeared from an office marked Principal. I asked if she were the principal and was told yes she is. I asked the secretary, who was telling me what to do, if I could speak with the principal. The secretary told me no but that she, the secretary, would tell the principal about this situation. The principal came to me and told me she respected my position and that the attendance would be changed and I should not be concerned with the matter. I asked about subsequent days attendance and the principal told me it will be taken care of but not by you (me). I asked if she wanted me to come back to teach for the remainder of the school year. She told me, “hell yeah”. Do you know how hard it is to get people to come here to teach? I finished the remained of my commitment and left teaching for about 25 years.

Let’s move to 2016.

We were staying at hotel for the purpose of attending a family wedding. I am eating breakfast with my family at one of the hotel that serves a full hot and cold breakfast when you are a guest at their hotels. This breakfast business and marketing plan is absolute genius. It is second only the marvels of the WWE formerly The WWF. Just brilliant in concept, theory and implementation.

Before this innovation and when traveling with our kids we would have to search for  breakfast in unfamiliar territory and hope for the best which it usually was. Breakfast and coffee shop places are soooooo gooooooooooood. No computers, cell phones, GPS and YELP!!!

Back to breakfast. While the kids were making their own waffles and my wife was occupied visiting family I began a conversation with a young man more than half my age. He was there for a wedding but with a different family than ours.

With such an age difference it was difficult to find topics to discuss beyond breakfast, the weddings and weather. He told me he was living near the town where I was born and raised. He continued by telling me he worked in a school in a rough neighborhood. One thing lead to another and behold, he is working in the same school district about which I just wrote and you just read.

I told him the story you just read. He was somewhat aghast, bewildered and shocked to hear my historical tale. He could not believe that what I experienced over 40 years ago he was doing in the here and now. He was teaching as part of program to earn college credits. He had one year to go and he was Out of There.

History does repeat itself but in this case at what price and at what cost. As always and quite tragically it is the kids who suffer and struggle the most and so on and so on and skooby-dooby do on.

Our Kids, What Have We Done?

I am writing this from off the top of my aging cranium, aka, Marty’s Mindless mound of Manure.

No proofreading. No editing. No final draft. I am not perfect and neither are you so stop faking it. Admit your frailties, mistakes and failures. More importantly learn from them and teach your kids to do the same. Perfect does not exist so stop trying to get your kids to be perfect.

We have ruined a generation of kids who grew up being enabled and coddled thinking and believing they are actually as good as we have been artificially telling they are foe decades. Everything they did was a “win” with Good Job, Good Job, Good Job echoing in their mind, body and soul.

You don’t learn from winning. You learn from losing, making mistakes and “failure” which is why it is called learning. Every kid does not have to make the team, be given (not earned a trophy with goodie bags, pasta parties, uniforms, team pictures and pods of grown-ups yelling, cheering, hollering, screaming, cursing, badgering, harassing and embarrassing the kids especially their own.

I took our son to the championship basketball game in the town’s recreation program. Our team were spectators, however a few of his friends were playing in the championship game. His friends team lost. I was standing with the one of our son’s friends father the entire game. When the game was over this father yelled across the gym,”hey Joey, hurry up, lets go, we have to get to grandma and grandpas house. His son replied back, “okay dad but first I have to get my trophy”. The Dad went orbital and yelled back, “trophy, what trophy, you lost you don’t get a trophy for losing. About 60-70 other parents were in attendance and were in awe of this fathers response. Most were astonished but those same folks nodded their heads in agreement and approval. In fact, the school gym in which this championship game was played had its own school team with 32 kids on the team with only 7-9 who played. Nobody got cut from the team. They all got uniforms and could say they made the team. What have done to a generation of kids.

I will tell you.

Those same kids go off to college unprepared to face the stress, anxiety frustration and eventual achieving less that the A’ and B’s “earned in school. Blend this with being away from home, constantly being asked by parents if they are getting good grades and enjoying the college experience and the recipe for letdown, emotional, physical, biological, psychological and the social life of drinking and drugs and the result is an unprepared kid not ready to meet the rejection world that awaits, in debt, confused and having to live with failure in their minds. What have we done to our kids?

Go back to that same middle school of the championship game. A friend did some substitute teaching at the school. I was that everyday between 8 and 9 AM more than half the school lines up at the nurses office to receive their prescribe medications for ADD/HD, anxiety, depression, mood stabilizers and who knows what else (thank you confidentiality) that burden the kids progress in school and well beyond the classroom.

PLAY is absent from kids lives. We have taken PLAY from our kids for many excuses and no reasons. Reasons define success while excuses explain failure. Kids just don’t know how to learn about which I could write volumes but will summarize by providing an example, which, as you have read in my previous BLOG Posts,  is the best explanation, of something I did with our son and kids in our town. I am not tooting my own horn, seeking affirmation or anything else. I am just providing proof of what works for kids by letting them be kids empowering them by teaching them life lessons through play and, hopefully work, as well. There is no limit of thy good one can as long as they care not about getting the credit.

Here’s one of my stories: Kids and Play!!!

When our son was in summer day camp I would pick him up around noon. At home we would eat lunch and he would relax until 2 PM when he and I would ride bikes, swim or attempt to fish at the mud hole. This got old real fast and I knew I had to do something. I went back to days of youth. My wife and I got on the telephone and sent e-mails to the families of the kids from day camp who I knew were in town and probably struggling with the same boredom as my son and I. Our message was simple: Pick-up baseball at the park. Bring your glove, bat and water. The first day nine kids showed up and I did infield and batting practice with them. By the third day 26 kids showed up ranging in age from third to ninth grade. I appointed two kids as managers/captains. They had to choose teams fairly, make the batting order and assign field positions which were to be changed every inning or two so that each kid had the chance to play as many positions as desired. I did the pitching to keep the game moving. Kids came on foot, by bike, on scooters, and by car. Parents could stay or they could do whatever they had or wanted to do. I scheduled the game to go from 2-4 PM when parents would arrive to take their kids home. No one wanted to be first to take their kid home and many were the times that we played until 6 PM when I would take the initiative by shutting things down. The kids went home tired, hungry and ready for tomorrow. Often I would get calls at home from kids and parents wanting to know if the game was on for tomorrow. This is what kids should be doing. Playing without the yelling, screaming, hollering, structure, trophies, pictures and goodie bags. The kids were outdoors where they belong having fun, resolving their own issues, learning about life and just having fun at play. On the weekends if there was a game I let other Dads, who were busy during the week, get involved and be part of the action as I sat back and watched. At first they wanted to do everything but soon learned and were encouraged by me to back away and let the kids be kids. All those kids are now in college or working and when they around and we meet their first remarks are about the great time and fun they had playing “Pick-Up” baseball at the park.

Life Lessons Learned: Organization, Sharing, Conflict Resolution (out- safe, out safe, you guys work it out), Promptness, Leadership, Management, Teamwork, Thinking, Listening, Discipline, Structure, Rules, Consequences, Behaviors, Anger, Frustration, Patience, Socialization, Culture, Diversity, Inclusion, Age Differences, CONFIDENCE and all the other things parents send their kids to head jockeys to get a prescription and learn coping skills when all they have to do is PLAY. Recess at school is a good place to start where kids can yell, scream, holler, jump, kick a ball, climb, slide and get dirty which is okay. They are kids. Stop trying to mess with their ages. Let kids be kids and they will be great adults doing the same things for their kids and so on and so on just like multi-level marketing and that shampoo commercial from 50 years ago.

Go out and play even if it is cold, damp and rainy. Mud and dirt are good, clean, healthy and fun. It is like sweating. It shows you have done something productive, healthy and FUN which is what PLAY is all about.

Go home, shower, warm-up with a cup of hot chocolate wand marshmallows and relax with your kids. Put the electronics away as well if just for an hour or two.

Between Game Report

More from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure. Watch your step!!!

The end of the early game and the beginning of the mid-afternoon game so now is a good time to post. I can watch the late game until around halftime when sleep is upon me. By the way do you look at or watch television?

Three signs that a society / culture are falling and failing are:

1 No respect for language and the spoken word.

2 The gap between the have’s and have not’s is increasing.

3. Lack of, or worse yet, no trust in leadership.

There is hope that things may be changing.

1. Some schools, it’s a start, are reintroducing recess for the kids since it was discovered and published by the experts that play is actually good for the kids and beneficial for the teachers as well. Kids perform and behave better when they have a chance to let go of excess energy bu running, yelling, screaming, hollering, climbing, chasing, kicking a ball, throwing a ball, shooting a ball, jumping rope, hula-hooping and in general just being kids enjoying play. Playing is an easy way to teach verbs if that is still done. Spell check anyone? All the excess energy is accumulated by constantly being in front of a SCREEN. Oh those EMF’s.

2. Television shows are being reintroduced that were very successful in their day which was about 20 years ago. Once the media gets involved the general public usually agrees and follows. All you have to do is look at the television offerings to see how poor those offerings are. 900 channels and nothing to watch. 500 friends and nobody to talk with and listen to as well as having someone who will listen to me and my woes.

We have a long way to go but these are two good things that can be increased to develop and create a society / culture of human humans as opposed to what we have become as we watch disasters, the “news”, corruption, scandal and all the bag ’em up, blow ’em up and shoot ’em up programs that are mindless, repetitive and conditioning.

This is not an overnight fix. It may take a generation or two to do a 180 degree reversion. We do not want to do a 360 since that will put us back where we started which is in the here and now. It is more like recovery where serious and genuine folks in recovery know they are in it for the rest of their lives which is good for them, their families and society.

Learn form the past, live in the present and prepare for the future. Who would have thought that recess and television would be the places that began the movement to recover our way of life, values and perhaps the repair / rehab and building of a strong family unit foundation.

Trust is in bold above since without trust nothing good will and can happen. Look what has been produced by those in positions of trust who violated that trust and ruined countless lives and families as well.

Tuesday Tidbits

Only a few Tuesday Tidbits Today from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure. It’s deep today so your eyes may turn brown.

I always thought the next big required rehabilitative medical treatment would be for folks damaging their digits from use and overuse of the electronic devises. Oops!!! So far I am wrong which happens more often than being right. Once I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken.

Actually, the doctors who will seeing an increase in business will be Plastic Surgeons. Why? With all the malicious miserable managers, lousy leaders and bad bosses spewing their venom in toxic workplace environments it will be the recipients of the rudeness and unprofessional behaviors who are constantly biting their lips to avoid reacting to the daily onslaught of savagery, stupidity and sarcasm delivered by the weak, warped and  and worthless wastes who sincerely believe they have power to hurt, harm and hate that will need the surgeons services.

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TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many choices!!!

Have you ever tried to decide which pair of footwear to buy? It is not easy. You find the right size but the wrong color. You find the right color but the wrong accent decorations. You find the right fit but not the name brand. And so on. And so on.

Stress, anxiety, fear and panic comes from indecision or second guessing your decision. Think a bit. Consider your options. Be open to change. Make the call. Decide and let it ride. Changes can be made. Kids transfer from school to school. Folks change their minds about lunch selections. Some labor over which clothes to wear. It’s endless, like the book I am writing abut things I do not know.

When you come to a place where you can only go left, right or turnaround, make your decision. If you are correct then fine. If not, go one of the other two ways or consult your GPS or read a map but not while driving and in motion. Park the vehicle for a few minutes, gather yourself, regain your composure and make a change altering your original decision.

Worry, doubt and confusion come form not having trust, faith and confidence to make a decision any decision. When playing cards some of the guys would say, “Think Long Think Wrong”. An oversimplification? Perhaps, but there is substance. Often we agonize over our thoughts, feelings and emotions worrying more about what others will think about us based on our decisions than we are concerned for ourselves and our well being.

Society is disintegrating because we cannot think for ourselves. We need to be told what to say, think, do and feel by experts or by someone who may not have our best interest in mind but has the need to offer their opinions which as we know are like a belly buttons, everyone has one.

Example: A popular long running television game show has a segment where the contestant must make a decision, a choice of a some kind. Invariably from the stage the contestant looks to their crew in the audience who are all barking, hollering and gesturing their advice, opinions and suggestions which the on stage contestant usually takes rather than making their own decision. Is it fear of failure or taking the initiative to decide for oneself. Is it having and needing someone to blame for our failures as is the case with our current culture. Not my fault. Whose fault? Your fault. Default. Asphalt!!!

Fear has tremendous power. Once it was used to motivate and inspire. Do this or this could happen to you. I trusted and respected my coaches but I also feared some of them since they were truthful, honest and most often correct. They led with their knowledge, experience, preparation, accessibility and personalities. Unlike today where intimidation, retaliation and blame are at the forefront of leadership.

Fear is an impediment to progress. Fear brings with it many negative components such as dismay, trepidation, anxiety, panic, angst, worry, doubt, confusion and many more than you can find on GOOGLE. Fear just might replace a different more well known and overused word (perhaps considered vulgar and inappropriate in reputation but used in abbreviated forms such as WT?), as the four letter word most feared.

We have made fear real and given it credence. Instead of using fear to motivate and inspire we use it to bring us down when actually most of what we fear and worry about never happens. We have been conditioned by the many forms of “actively passing” time using electronics and have been witness to innumerable amounts of negativity in the course of our day. We see and listen to horror stories all day. Plus, we talk about these events as conversation rather than sincerely asking  “hey, how are doing to day?” Well not good. I am going through ___________________. We don’t do that. Why? Because we are consumed with things that only happen to others.

Example: When The Weather Channel first came on the scene folks in Florida loved watching the big snow storms smother their home towns “Up North”. Wow, that looks terrible. How awful, no power, roads closed, everything closed. I hope they got to the grocery store to load up on toilet paper. I hope the plumbing still works. I better call my neighbors to get the scoop, no not the scoop they use for their dogs.

Just like blame, it’s not my fault, so to is it I am glad it is them and not me /us. Let’s get to the restaurant before the early bird is over. And bring the coupon. Did ya see the weather report. There’s a hurricane out there heading our way. After dinner we better go to the grocery store for essentials. Bring the leftovers. Better buy lottery tickets while we are there as well.

It is all related, decision making or lack there of, fear about making the wrong decision, fear itself which is the only thing we have to fear (FDR for those who need a history lesson) blaming others for our frailties (when you have one finger pointing at someone you actually have three fingers pointing back at YOU) and gaining comfort in others misery and suffering though there is no comfort from the misery of the miserable leaders out there. You know who you are. I’ll wager you get a perverse pleasure from making those under your control and dominance miserable. Get some help. Better yet be open to karma since what goes around comes around.

Example: There might be one person responsible for this wave of indecision that permeates throughout our world. This person had one flavor of food and almost 30 flavors of ice cream. The business dotted the highways and could be seen from afar as the bright pumpkin like colors of the buildings welcomed weary wayward travelers. Little was know back then of the affect and yes impact, of the tooooooo many choices would have on us in modern times.

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This will summarize what your have just read:

Good Judgment Comes from Experience and Experience Comes From Poor Judgment

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Race – Culture – Diversity – Inclusion -Understanding – Empowerment

The following is one of my true stories though it is part of Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Though it occurred about fifty years ago it is more relevant today than it was back then based on the multiple recent events in our country.

In 1969 my first assignment after basic training and schooling was at The United States Air Force Clark Air Base in The Philippines. After a twenty six hour flight, with a few stops along the journey, I arrived on my 19^th birthday, took a walk around the base and followed towering lights that illuminated a football practice field. Leaning up against a fence I watched until the end of practice and found one of the coaches to whom I spoke about my desire to play. He told me to come back tomorrow night at 7 PM which I did. That resulted in me being given a practice uniform which I used the following night. I was lucky to be stationed in The Philippines where, in addition to being a beautiful country with wonderful people, music, customs, traditions, folklore, history, culture and FOOD, I had the opportunity to learn, grow and prosper with education, awareness and knowledge not available in the traditional learning environment.

I planted myself on the defensive line where I stayed, started and played for two seasons making the all-star team both years. My life at Clark was filled with work, football, cards in the barracks on paydays. a bit of sightseeing and on occasion a visit to Angeles City for a San Miguel, food, music and participation in cultural and social activities. For many GI’s it was the chance to do things that were just reaching the middle class in America and which have always existed in the lower and upper class of the economic strata. Given the chance to go back guys would be lined up for miles to return to indulge in pleasures they probably never told anyone outside of those who had similar experiences.

 The best part of my entire two seasons was that I was the only White guy on the starting defensive team which was quite spectacular for many reasons. Before each game we would change into our uniforms in a “hut” near the field. As we were changing a bottle of Thunderbird (what’s the word Thunderbird, what’s the price .60 twice) was being passed around by the starting defensive players, of which I was one as previously mentioned. The bottle came to me. All my teammates’ eyes were on me and with their eyes they were saying “Will he”? Without hesitation I lifted the bottle to my mouth and downed a big swig of T-Bird. The guys all cheered and we “high-fived” each other in brotherhood. We had two winning seasons and a few of us made the All-Star Team. We saw no color except our green uniform jerseys. We lived, worked, played and socialized together.  I miss the guys who often told me that “I had more soul than I could control”.  My life was enhanced, enriched and enlightened from the times I spent with the all the guys Black, White and everyone else. 

The barracks in which I lived had been integrated the year before I arrived at Clark. Before this, the Black guys lived in remote barracks on the fringes of the base. I never saw where they lived but some of the old timers told me stories about the conditions.

 My barracks was filled with Blacks, Whites, Islanders, Hispanics and two Jews of which I was one. We never had a problem. Even the guys from the South publicly adjusted to showering and sharing bathroom facilities and dining halls with guys unlike them. In private, though, their stories were quite inflammatory but they never let their emotions deter from their job performance and co-habitation with guys with whom they had nothing good to say.

In the integrated barracks next to mine there were Black Panther meetings several times a week.  Only the Black guys went and they did not allow their attitudes, feelings, emotions and everything else spread to the public community.

I may be naïve, stupid, ignorant, unaware or just plain old dumb but I never heard about of any violence, property damage or physical altercations during my 18 months on base at Clark.

 There was an active and profitable Black Market at Clark which was NOT named Black Market because only Black guys were involved. Free Enterprise, Business is Business. For those involved the only color was Green as it is today. We had cigarette and liquor ration vouchers which a few entrepreneurial and enterprising guys used for profit by servicing their customers since in all businesses without customers to service you have no business.

Now customer disservice has trumped customer service and has become more of a customer self service and call 1-800-000-000 if you have a problem, issue or concern. (By the way, when calling 1-800 and prompted to press “1” for English only to wait forever to speak with a human, press “2” for Spanish since all the customer service folks speak English). One would sell their ration vouchers for a fixed price to the guys taking the risk and those guys would deliver the goods off base to downtown contacts who would sell the products to locals who were in the distribution business. Black Market Business just might be the second oldest profession.

 Downtown Angles City was a divided town. Right outside the main gate was known as The Strip where anybody could roam the streets, participate in various offerings, indulge in the street food, and ride in a beautifully decorated Jeep leftover from MacArthur during World War II.

 A couple of miles from the Strip was The Block where only the Black guys could congregate for their social interactions. It was well known by all non-Black guys that one did not venture down on The Block since many incidents occurred to those who visited who were not part of the community and culture. Twice I went down on The Block. Both times escorted by my football Black teammates who insured my safety and well being. While walking the streets, eating and drinking I was watched, visually screened and made to feel quite uncomfortable and unsafe by those Americans and locals who did not know my identity. Several times the table I was at with my Black Teammates was approached and my Black Teammates had to explain me. This is probably how Blacks feel when they walk around a store followed by staring eyes waiting for something to happen or Blacks who drive through neighborhoods unlike where they live as they face the onslaught of looks, doubt, concern, worry and fear from the locals.

 Clark had a movie theater. I went a few times but couldn’t tell you what was showing. I do remember that it was custom, tradition and mandatory to stand at “attention” while the National Anthem was being played. The only guys who did not stand were the Black guys so please do not consider the 2017 protests as something new. Though I did feel awkward and a bit confused from my lack of knowledge I did understand after a few of my Black Teammates explained their plight and provided reasons for their non-involvement in the pre-movie ceremony. They all told me that until I walk in their shoes please do not pass judgment. A little knowledge, insight and wisdom go a long way to understanding. By the way, this was around the same time as the Black Comedy (nothing racial about Black Comedy, Black Ice or Black Friday) movie “MASH” was circulating. It was banned by the leadership at Clark because of its insubordination and inappropriate content which may have caused and influenced behaviors, attitudes and values to change since through the magic words of comedy, satire and mockery rests truth. And we all know truth should set us free but in today’s world it continues to hide and be hidden through manipulated obfuscation. 

So, what does all this have to do with anything? Nothing much, if anything, at all. Only, perhaps, if we knew just a little about history, listen twice as much as we speak (two ears, one mouth, get it) and understood our own world we may just have the ability to focus on the important matters such as family, health, education, work, empowerment, critical thinking, communications, understanding, compassion, leadership, life-style, play, fun, laughter and everything else that has become an impediment to our society, culture and overall safety and well being. 

By the way, the next time a Charlottesville event is scheduled anywhere in our country let’s have folks bring all the foods of their culture, nationality, ethnicity, religion and race and let the eating begin. Even those filled with hate will enjoy a good meal and leave wanting more of all that good stuff made, with LOVE, by those who they so ignorantly hate. 

My solutions are all simple. Simple always works best. This is why folks get along with me since they like the simple things in life. Simply put: excuses explain failure while REASONS define SUCCESS.

Illegitimi Non Carborundum

Translation, forthcoming as it all comes from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

This is my take on a crisis in the workplace. I know it is negative which I prefer to avoid. My goal is to turn this into a positive, healthy, awareness raising, exposing the ugliness and actually doing something good for those struggling with this unwanted affliction. It all comes from the top. When the top is strong, successful, healthy and productive everyone feels the strength, support and trust. When the top is in bully mode most everyone feels the wrath except, of course those still existing “yes” folks who agree (you doubt my leader and your leader as well? you doubt therefore you are? regardless of personal beliefs often contrary to the leaders but I must agree or else I will be out as well as all the other good folks) and who bow to the bully.

Nobody is to be treated this way. But we all know that is not the case. Like the truth The bully’s are out there. We do not always know where the truth is but we do know where the bully is and that is the truth.

Here is yet another LIST.

I am polling everyone to determine who has been in a workplace environment, or you know someone in this situation, where the below LIST, and many more synonymous words, can be used to describe a draining, intimidating and overall negative place to spend your day living in fear of the continuous threats, attacks and assaults made on your performance and most importantly on everything about YOU.

Earlier this week I read about a “leader” abusing the office, position and status for personal gain. Pick-up my laundry. Have my car washed. Make my personal, not business, travel arrangements. Pick-up my kids at their private school that your kids cannot afford to go to nor do you have the “right” connections to gain admission for your kids. Sound familiar? ETHICS???

Ha. Ha. Look at me. How did this person get that job? What gives this person the right to have subordinates live in fear of losing their jobs if they do not comply and follow the leaders lead doing whatever is asked? If asked, these “leaders” will, like some athletes, spread their territorial arms, shrug their shoulders, wear a facial expression of dis-belief and ask: What? What’d I do? You’re crazy.

Examples: Too many to mention here. Most are in high ranking positions of “leadership” with power, control and influence over those who are unfortunate to work for one of these entitled leaders who often complain about entitlements and do what they can to reduce entitlements for those who actually need help the most. Ah, the gall. The unmitigated gall of people who take advantage of their “good fortune” (emphasis on the word fortune which is how they made their fortunes), when they should be doing the direct opposite which is the hallmark of Leadership. Leaders lead by example. Healthy or not their power is felt trickling down the line to the newest member of the dangerous world of unbridled leadership. When will we get it. Just because they’re rich, powerful and almighty they think they know. They don’t. What they do know is how to play the game of get mine and move on to the next place where they will repeat the process of destruction of human performance, value and self worth all in the name of me (look at me, look at me, look at me) and what I can and will do TO you to make your life and world as miserable as possible but not as miserable as my own meager existence. I am the BULLY. No, not me, but you know to whom I am referring. If you are one of “these” bullies then shame on you.

As you see from the following alphabetical list I spent some time asking my good friend Webster, the dictionary not the television show character, for help. I don’t know much, if anything at all, but sometimes I know where to get the answers (not as efficiently as a Reference Librarian) I am seeking with and without internet help.

Acerbic

Acrimonious

Aggressive

Antagonistic

Bellicose

Belligerent

Bitter

BULLYING

Callous

Caustic

Combative

Confrontational

Contentious

Cruel

Distant

Entitled

Hurtful

Hostile

Isolating

Malicious

Mean

Nasty

Poisonous

Pugnacious

Rancorous

Retaliatory

Savage

Spiteful

Toxic

Threatening

Truculent

Venomous

Vengeful

Vicious

Vindictive

Virulent

Do some or all of these words describe your workplace environment? You can add other similar words to my list based on your experiences.

If you so choose you can let me know, anonymously of course, your tale of woe at your workplace. Be as detailed as you like. Be accurate, open and honest with your story. If I get enough stories and with everyone’s permission I can include them in a future BLOG Post or better yet we can create a book, have it published or ideally go on the speaking circuit with our stories. A REAL reality show!!! Remember everything is anonymous. It may be helpful and therapeutic for you to get it all out, vent in a safe place and let others know they are not alone in their horrific world of BULLYING at work.

My story occurred after college graduation working for a “leader” who verbally assaulted, tortured, abused, harassed, badgered (again, like those parents doing these behaviors at their kids sports games) and almost destroyed my spirt, passion and energy. Illegitimi Non Carborundum. It was under this leadership that I began my personal well being program of exercise, meditation and nutrition wanting to avoid the relentless pursuit of personal destruction. Illegitimi Non Carborundum.

In addition to me, this “leader’ made other staff, often referred to as ‘my staff’ suffer the assaults spread throughout the workplace. People walked on egg shells, shards of glass and lived on the edge and verge of defeat. Illegitimi Non Carborundum.

After a couple of years of this daily battle to survive the top leaders took the initiative and sent this leader on their way out the door. Some had a meeting with the top leader who listened to their stories and was shocked to hear the tales of despair. All the top leader said was I’m sorry”. Not good enough. Where were you when all this was happening and word about this sub -human behavior was known throughout the office. Where were you oh great leader. On the golf course? Schmoozing? Making deals for yourself? Oblivious, non-caring and apathetic to those who made your organization a highly efficient, well regarded, reputable, trusted and sought after group of experts in their various fields of expertise? Illegitimi Non Carborundum.

It’s not always Silly.  

Mid-Week Silliness

Might you need a boost right now? Here it is right from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Wednesday, which is spelled and pronounced a bit awkwardly, was formerly known for a pre-pasta era noun, beans for the government and camel day. When buying a car, a generation or so ago, you prayed your car was “built” on a Wednesday not just before or right after the weekend.

Try saying the following silly stuff five times real fast. Practice in a room by yourself, in front of a mirror the way you were taught to practice public speaking, or if you are so brave, courageous and bold (like Wyatt Earp’s theme song, who’s he, Google or YouTube it) say them in front of family, friends, co-workers, etc and let the silliness make your day a success in addition to your daily accomplishments.

Here’s the list of a few difficult things to pronounce, especially in the fast lane. Remember five times real fast. See if you can get to five flawlessly, like riding a bull for eight seconds. Eventually you will succeed but until them have some fun.

*Your World

*Unique New York

*Toy Boat

*Irish Wrist Watch

*Truly Rural

*Literally Literary

*Three Free Throws

Now for my favorite:

Say the following ten lines as fast as you can. Don’t give up. Enjoy the silliness then get serious about completing this task. And have some fun with it as well. Offer it to others at lunch. Use it as an ice-breaker during the awkward social settings we find ourselves uncomfortably in after work at Not-So-Happy Hours of over indulging in reflux causing snacks, treats and goodies for all you foodies. Add to the quiet times when nobody can think of something to say especially at family gatherings. Do I really want to be here. You know what I mean. Family is great. Family is the foundation, backbone, support and strength of  societies, cultures and countries. However, there are occasions, though, when you need a bit of distance, space and time.

Ready – Set – Go as fast (even though I preach a slow it down lifestyle, hypocrite that I may be) as you can or want.

Try reading the following line by line to give you a visual focus. Be a rebel and do it from memory.

I apologize for the line-up. I tried to “left justify”, or is it signify, but I am mystified that I could not get all ten lines neatly and properly stacked. I must have clicked the “TAB”  (not the beverage) button and don’t know how to “un-TAB

1. One Smart Fella, He Felt Smart

2. Two Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

3. Three Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

4. Four Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

5. Five Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

6. Six Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

7. Seven Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

8. Eight Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

9. Nine Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

10. Ten Smart Fellas, They Felt Smart

Easy. Right? Perhaps not at first. If it were easy then everyone would do it from 1-10 on their first attempt. Did you go from one to ten without any mistakes? How far did you get?

A few may make it all the way from 1-10 with no mistakes but like most things in life, if it were that easy then everyone would be doing it (didn’t I just write that?) and we all know that is not the case with this silliness and the more serious side of our world.

You are NOT Alone!!!

Good Morning from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

I just found out I am one of about twenty million people in a heavy rain downpour, flash flooding and torrential precipitation thunderstorm and lighting weather system heading our way maybe your way as well. Check with your local radio and television station. Check with your airline if you are traveling using one the on-time performance leaders of business and industry. Your plane is scheduled to depart at 7:00 AM but wait. Not actually. That 7:00 AM departure time is when the plane pushes back from the gate and all the boarding groups are “in” the plane not “on” the plane, stowing all their stuff, microwaves, golf clubs, more crap than they ever will need for a three day escape from their misery, problems, issues and concerns, screaming into their cell phones oblivious to the world, as if nobody else is in the plane.  You may sit in the flight line queue for an hour so before the plane is airborne. Don’t worry all the delays are built into the flight times and schedules. Whew!!! And I thought I was going to have to get through this all my myself. The weather and its trickle down impact. Read on about impact.

Well, all the well dressed, bright smiles and positive attitudes, even when telling us of human disasters, property damage, carnage, welcome home uniformed parents from overseas better known as the onion thank you for your service, reassured me that I am NOT alone in this weather journey and there is comfort, not necessarily safety in numbers, twenty million of them (us) in fact.

I was told by the caring, compassionate, warm, friendly voices and the multi-colored maps boldly displaying the various zones with brightly illuminated indicators of specific regions of the storms, of the advisory, warning, watch, index of the impending storms that will be devastating for many of the twenty million just not sure exactly where. Can’t tell you that until after the storm is out of our region which is a fairly big region if twenty million people are impacted. Have no fears though. The weather folks will be out there driving through the storm wearing their windbreakers and hats with the company logo affixed, talking to the camera next to them instead of keeping their eyes on the roads, walking down flooded streets talking to stranded folks in their vehicles or watching a surfer enjoying natures power waiting for an emergency with the surfer to report as it is happening, That’s news. The present tense, not the past tense. Also, while those folks are out in the storm reporting to us they are also encouraging even pleading with us to stay safe and indoors, not to venture out in harms way as they are doing. AHHH, the mixed message from an earlier post. Love that word impacted. Much more powerful than affected. Like wisdom teeth hurt more when they are impacted and not just a toothache. I suppose twenty million folks are at or on their way to the store to buy toilet paper, milk, bread, flashlights (don’t forget the batteries) and everything they can get their hands on before the power goes out so they can pay for their stuff instead of having to resort to taking it without permission and payment.

Twenty million affected by the storms is not too bad since it only represents about seven percent of the USA Population. Ahhh, those statistics from an earlier post. See how things are related even when they are not.

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With all the TRANSPARENC and OBFUSCATION who controls the Manure Message?

The truth is somewhere just not available to us. Bribes, Graft, Corruption, Gossip, Scandal, Who’s doing what to whom, as long as it is not impacting (affecting) me who cares what they do since they’re gonna do it anyway. Morals, Ethics, Values, who are they for? Me. You. Us. Perhaps not them. It is all time fillers. Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!! Do something. Participate rather than spectate. Confusion, Deceit, Doubt, Cynicism, Skepticism. Now that’s the stuff that sells

It’ like HONESTY. When you hear those all too telling words: “Let me be perfectly honest with you”, let the sirens go off in your head, bells, whistles and lights flash like the lightening in today’s storm and immediately think, Hey if you are being perfectly honest with me now what have you been before this warning about being perfectly honest with me right now. Suspicions. Can I trust you anymore? Should I have been trusting you up until now. Where is your TRANSPARENCY or did you just divulge it by being perfectly honest with me.

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I ain’t doing that any more or any less whatever your “that” is.

I’m gonna raise more hell than the alligators did when the pond went dry. Actually I’m not. It just sounds funny.

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Speaking of ADDICTIONS. Got your attention now. It is in vogue and fashionable, expensive and profitable, almost celebrity noteworthy to discuss addiction when those suffering and struggling are the ones who need to do the talking. Peer to Peer. Common Ground. Trust. Safety. Pain is Real. HELP!!!

Example: This might be a repeat from an earlier BLOG Post but what the heck filler is filler.

Many years ago I had to stand in line waiting for my daily work assignment. The first couple of days I was way back in the line. We had to remain quiet.

From the front of the room all I would hear was yelling, screaming, hollering, cursing, badgering, harassing, rudeness, profanity and no appearance of a nurturing heart. The guy giving out the work assignments was the guy behaving like modern day parents at their kids youth sports games. He was awful. Rude, Crude and definitely socially unacceptable even by the standards, norms and rules back then.

As I got closer to his desk he seemed to have calmed down, becoming a bit more human and able to communicate without all his nastiness.

On his desk were two huge thermoses, or is it thermi, that were empty since he went reaching for them attempting to drain every drop of the liquid fuel that eased his pain.

It wasn’t until after he consumed both containers and gulped down the contents that he reverted to a more acceptable status. The two containers were loaded with coffee and until he drank both containers he was unbearable, probably constipated as well. After he downed both thermoses, or is it thermi, he was “right” and he would actually engage in gentle, civil and pleasant conversation mostly about the weather not knowing how many millions of people are in the path of today’s forecast.

I told myself, self,  right there, at age 19, that I would never allow any product, substance, beverage food, except maybe cookies, okay ice cream, well sticky buns I know I know sugar, fat, sugar fat sugar fat, to have control over me.

I never have consumed a cup of coffee. I like the smell when the can is opened. I have made coffee reluctantly since no two folks “take” their coffee the same way which must drive the baristas, et al absolutely crazy. By the way being crazy is okay since it keeps you from going insane. Besides it is just a state of mind. Two sugars, one cream. No cream, fresh milk. Fake sugar (I’m cutting back), three creams. Half Regular coffee half De-caf coffee, no sugar, four creams. I am most certain there are scores and more combinations but what I know about coffee and all the combinations would echo in a thimble.

I did smoke cigarettes in high school but not during sports season. They were twenty cents a pack, $2.00 dollars a carton. Then the price jumped to twenty-five cents a pack. I hung in there. But then the price went to thirty cents a pack and that is where I drew the line. It was easy and convenient to throw down one coin, a quarter, on the counter at the corner store but now I had to add that extra nickel which put me over the top most significantly since that nickle, even that quarter gave me hours of pleasure, therapy and entertainment playing the pinball machines where I was quite adept and would win “free” games with my pin-balling skills.

In addition, cigarettes caused my fingertips to turn brownish yellow, my clothes to smell like a bowling alley causing me to spray deodorant on my clothes to hide the smell from Mom and Dad who knew anyway and worst of all is when I went to pick my nose all I would smell were my fingertips which smelled like a filled ashtray. Also, mouthwash makes your breath smell worse than the cigarette smell and it tastes nasty except when using after brushing your teeth.

I was never one to indulge in the brew. When I did some drinking it was beer. I would “nurse” one or two beers a night while all the other guys drank 6, 8, a dozen or more a night. Those guys got skinnier while I ballooned up forty pounds from my high school (no, I never scored four touchdowns or any for that matter in one game) playing weight which was overweight as well. My DNA can’t handle the beverage and the subsequent weight gain so I stay with cookies, ice cream and sticky buns as previously mentioned.

Drugs, Chemicals and other Substances. Learning comes in many forms. Often I learn from what I see and what I saw were the horrible negative affects and impact(?) of putting stuff in your body that ain’t suppose to be in there. Ugly. Destructive. Catastrophic. Not for me. Hopefully, not for you. Have compassion for those suffering and struggling with the illness. Help those who need help find help. It is out there like the truth. If you look you will find. You are NOT alone!!!

Multi-Mayhem?

More from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure and it isn’t even March Madness, yet.

Safe to say at this hour you are making plans or already have plans for the upcoming weekend. Great!!! While you are doing something good for yourself think about, try and actually do something good for someone else. You’ll feel good about yourself. No need to tell others, brag or boast just Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!!

DEFINITION: Multi-tasking: Doing many things at the same time none of them very well.

MASH’s Dr. Charles Emerson Winchester III: “I do one thing. I do it very well. I move on”.

Simple advise yet in today’s overactive, hectic and accelerated pace very difficult to do.

Slow things down. Make time your friend. Potty trained kids will be empowered to do potty stuff when they are ready. Statistics give you some insight as to the time frame. Please do not attempt to advance the process to make you feel good and falsely artificially proud of your kid. Write it down and cross it off upon completion. We live life one day at a time. Why not tackle our tasks in the same manner. One at a time.

Silly: Multi-tasking or is it? This may be considered revolting, tasteless and disgusting but I think it is silly and somewhat educational. Ah, the Power of Definition. If this offends you I apologize. If you like it please laugh just a little since it or something like this has happened in your world. Specific names are not mentioned to avoid embarrassment and more importantly, to keep the peace.

EXAMPLE: Suppose there are five people eating dinner at the round dinner table (a round table is better especially at restaurants when you have large groups. it allows eye contact and conversation with everyone instead of isolating folks) and not in front of a screen. I know it is rare but it could happen.

There are two adults and three kids, two boys and one girl all of whom are of middle school age. While indulging in dinner there are conversations on various topics such as school, sports and family.

As often happens someone says something silly or unrelated to the topic and all of a sudden there is uncontrollable laughter, I mean, that deep, rich, hearty, belly aching, tears from the eyes, no sound coming from the mouth type laughter that spreads throughout dinner with a healthy side of the silly. Okay now, BREATHE!!!

During this explosion of uncontrollable laughter the girl, who is so involved with the entire laughing situation, multi-tasks echoing sounds from her body in the form of a sneeze, belch and fart all at the same time. The one thing that did not happen was there was no food or beverage flying out of her nose. One of the boys is so shocked at her outburst of genuine, authentic and real reverberations it takes him a few minutes to process the many normal body functioning sounds.

You see he lives a home where his Mom is the only female. The boy did not know girls made “those” sounds especially the flatulence. Once calm was restored and eyes were dry he said: “I didn’t know girls did that”. It was good he learned this at his age. If he waited until he was older, let’s say 25-30, he would have reacted much differently and perhaps would have discontinued a relationship because “I didn’t know girls did that”. Just wait my friend. You will learn. Keep an open mind. Now what is being taught in school? Oh yeah, standards and cores and sameness oh my. Guys if you want a relationship to be strong and lasting lift the seat, wipe the floor and do some chores. Contribute. Participate. Laugh. We’re all the same in many ways and different in others. That is the appeal, attraction and mystery of life.

The girl and her multi-tasking is the exception to the opening of this Post. She did three things, all at the same time and she did them very well. Most importantly since it was family there was little, if any, embarrassment, and if there was, the laughter and its unknown source released so many good feeling endorphins nothing else mattered. Just like The White Wing Dove, nothing else matters.

We all have been in a place where we Feared the Flatulence. After one or two ooops’s (like ooops I mis-spoke which are lies only softer sounding) we cleaned up and learned how to mange and control future explosive situations.

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Helpful hint and tidbit of useless information from my vast warehouse and storage facility.

EXAMPLE: You buy fruit such as apples, pears, peaches, plums and nectarines. I know you wash each fruit prior to indulging in its healthy delicious flavor and taste.

When you bring the fruit home immediately remove the “sticky” label that has the price code number on it. The longer you wait to remove it the more difficult it will be to cleanly remove the sticky label in one piece especially in the warmer weather where the sticky label can melt into skin of the fruit.

Since we do not know the ingredients of the sticky label it is suggested you remove it and wash the fruit as soon as you get home.

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How The Top Ten and Countdowns have taken over.

We love statistics. Listen and watch an election. Listen and watch the highlights. Without statistics there is not much else about which to talk. Just like without insurance the medical and legal businesses would have no income. Without statistics what we would talk about? Perhaps we can substitute something more meaningful, fulfilling and needed. Such as, How are YOU doing, feeling, getting along, making it, handling life’s struggles…………………………? Wait we can’t talk about those sensitive, emotional and delicate topics since we have no statistics to throw into the conversation. Better see a paid stranger expert who knows and can show us colorful computer generated charts, graphs and statistics.

Example: Take baseball. The highlights show us all the great catches. throws, hits and pitches. Look at the stats. The best hitters in the professional level have maybe, a batting average of .350 which, if a player is consistent throughout his career, is guaranteed a place in the Hall of Fame. The .350 batting average means that for every 100 times the player is batting he gets a hit 35 times which make that player a daily top ten highlight source. Of course I am not sophisticated enough to figure in the “OBP” which is, I think, On-Base-Percentage, that indicates a players total amount of times he makes it to first base via a walk, error, passed ball on a third strike strike-out or being hit by a pitch. That’s another entry into the statistics abyss. I am sticking to the basics of times at bat and times a hit is made, single, double, triple and home run. The player who only achieves 20 hits for every 100 times he bats is usually a journeyman type player, not very interesting statistically speaking, does not generate sales of his uniform affixed with his name and number and will doubtfully make it to the Hall of Fame. This player can gain notoriety by exceeding a previously achieved statistic such as hitting five home runs in one game, pitching a no-hitter or making the game saving catch in the 7th game of the World Series. These type players usually make excellent managers and coaches. Whatever this player accomplishes might be reduced in value when an asterisk is placed next to his name and statistical achievement especially if this players accomplishment supersedes a more well known and statistically successful player.

Perhaps another statistic is born here. Why not have a hit value bonus system such as a single is worth ‘X”, a double is worth “Y”, a triple is worth “Z” and a home run is worth “Q” since we need to boost the value, ego and notoriety of “Q” because it is probably the least used letter of our alphabet. The scholarly will refute this unless we include the “U” with the “Q” since both are united by the pen, pencil or keyboard.

What the highlights do not reveal is that the future Hall of Fame player, who may be a rookie or in the early stages of his career and so his countdown begins, makes an “out” at a rate of .650 which is never discussed by the unlimited number of panel experts dissecting every move the player, the teams and the league makes. Air time must be filled and statistics fill the void. Listen to guys at work, at the lunch counter and on their smart (?) phones and you will hear statistics repeatedly discussed as they are on radio, televisions, podcasts and everywhere else.

I don’t know how athletes perform when they are constantly under the microscope both on and off the field of play. I played pool with a friend. He could make any shot from anywhere on the table. As soon as I said, “I’ll bet a quarter you miss the next shot”. He missed the next shot.  The pressure of performance and the bet caused him to lose focus and concentration. We installed floor coverings. Often the woman of the house was home. She would always arrive to look in on our progress at a critical time which is when the seam connection of the floor covering had to be cut precisely. As she watched I told her, very politely, that if she wanted her floor installed properly please leave the room for about ten minutes, then come back. If she wanted a slice of finger in the seam feel welcome to stay and observe. Most of us do not like to be observed while practicing our craft. Look up the statistics on that. The word practice is confusing. I do not want my doctor to “practice”. I want him / her in the the big leagues at the top of his / her game. I do not want him / her to practice or be observed when serving me unless, of course, it is a teaching / training situation for new doctors.

The most accurate basketball shooters make about 40-45% of their shots. Hall of Fame for those players. I know. I know. You never make a shot you don’t take. The highlights show us all the shots going through the basket. Sswwish!!!. But what happens to the other 60% of the shots. Bricks (there are so many bricks you would think these players were in the Masons), Air Balls. Hit the side of the backboard. The highlights do not show us those attempts. Kids watch the highlights and every shot goes in so they think that every shot they take should go in and when their shots don’t go in they must face the reality, disappointment and truth that most of their shots will not be made. Failure exceeds success. Ask successful folks and, if the are honest and truthful, they will tell they “failed” on their journey to success. Missed shots affects behaviors, attitudes and performance. Guys curse, yell, scream and holler when their shots miss the target, especially missing an open lay-up. We all have done that, even the pro’s. Watch the game and see the reactions of a missed shot. It should go in. Why didn’t it. According to my statistics I will miss more shots than I make just like everyone one else. And I thought I was special and unique like I have been told and coddled all my life. After all with my statistics and at age 25 I am destined for the Hall of Fame. Future Hall of Famer is the current handle pounded into a statistic hungry craniums or is it cranii.

The same kind of unofficial amateur analysis I just described can be found in most athletic competitions from youth sports to the pro ranks. Statistics rule, dominate and control each sport. What statistics can never reveal is HEART. All the experts discuss everything possible about a game, a sport, a player. What is rarely discussed is the HEART an individual has and how they use it. You can teach talent, you can’t teach HEART. Those who do talk about HEART usually don’t have it. I can’t describe it but I know it when I see it in sports and well beyond. You can fake most everything but not HEART which is in your DNA, Soul and, of course, HEART.

COUNTDOWNS: They’re everywhere. Elections, The Big Game. All Events. The First game of the new season. Stay with us. Coming up in a few minutes is the story you have been waiting for and the story we have been teasing you with the past 46 minutes. The clock silently clicks reducing the Countdown numbers. I’ll bet there is a wagering source that allows you to place a bet on when the first Christmas Commercial will be on television. Who will it be? Who will be first. They are lining up in advertising command and control centers anxiously waiting and wanting to be the first. Similar to media panelists all on the edge of their seats impatiently waiting to have their voice heard, opinions offered and, of course, supporting all their comments with statistics.

I think the Countdown began with one of the most successful enterprises in the business community. A business that is used as a model at elite business schools. A business that has been providing countdowns, without the clock in the top left or right corner of the screen, for decades promoting events months ahead of scheduled delivery. Can you guess the business I am suggesting as the Countdown Pioneer in modern day society and culture?

People waste their time, energy and lives existing in a Countdown world. Oh no, three more days until I have to go to the dentist. Ten hours and its back to that dreaded toxic, venomous and poisonous work place environment where I must go along, faking it, or else. Six days until finals. I feel the pressure, stress and anxiety building in my soul. This is how you lose control. The Countdown. It can be exciting if the particular Countdown does not affect you. But, when it does you feel the pain. I feel your pain. Wuccha ya gonna do. Let it win. Heck NO. You win. I win. We all win. “Illegitimi Non Carborundum”. Google it.

Better yet use a dictionary if people still use one. If not, you can always ask a Reference Librarian who will know where to find the answers. But to do so you might have to actually go the library and locate the Reference Librarian. Furthermore you might have to speak with a live person face to face. Can that be done? Face and meet that challenge and you will feel good about yourself.

Caring- Concern – Community. Two Parts

Major Mania (I worked for him during Military Service) from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Part One

One DIFFERENCE between Religion and Spirituality.

Religion is wonderful for many REASONS. It gives us a foundation on which to live our lives, definition, purpose, as well as a place to share like kind thoughts, philosophies and values. Religion offers traditions, customs, folklore, music, structure, leadership, social interaction (remember this one please), observances, rituals, guidance, direction, inspiration, support, FOOD, language, education and community (remember this one as well). It is, also, the place where amateur gamblers got their first taste of gambling in the form of raffles, 50-50’s and bingo.

The best thing about Religion is that it is portable.

Example: Let’s say you are living and working in location “A”. You get transferred, retire or decide to relocate to location “B”.

If you have kids in school the first thing you do is register your kids into the local or private school districts. The next thing you do is find and join your preferred House of Worship, hereinafter referred to as “HOW”. Both situations allow you to be part of a Community.

You do these two things or at least one of them to become part of a familiar, friendly, warm, welcoming, inviting COMMUNITY. You are now part of the whole instead of being isolated looking in from out since it is important to have human interaction beyond the workplace, breweries and anti-social media. Actually Social Media is mislabeled. It should known as “A” Social Media, since there is messaging instead of human involvement, the exchange of ideas, thoughts and general conversation / communications and eye contact. If you cannot get into someone’s eyes, where messages live, you will never get into their soul. I suppose the POWER OF DEFINITION has changed the meaning of Socialization. Oh, the professors will lament on this one, and the malls, for generations.

Many cities had neighborhoods of a diverse cultural Community. During the day folks would assimilate, ride the trains, subways and buses to work and back home to their familiar neighborhood where their native language was spoken, as they ate the foods (oh those wonderful smells and tastes which is what the explorers were looking for as they chased the spices, flavors and fragrances) of their countries, listening to homeland music and reveling in the history of their previous worlds, hopefully, passing family stories down to their kids, especially the language component. One of the recent Popes could speak most any language which meant, as he traveled the globe, he could say in the local language, “excuse me, where’s the bathroom”. Quite empowering. Give your kids your language and they are rich beyond money. Traveling helps too. Just ask the Study Abroad kids who traveled to countries where English was NOT the most spoken language. They survived and enjoyed their experiences.

Spirituality differs a bit. Spirituality is often explained but rarely ever well expressed because of its individuality. Perhaps spirituality is like fingerprints and snowflakes, no two alike. It allows you to make the decisions. You define your spiritual world. You bring in those things that offer you peace, calm, tranquility, serenity and void of the structure found in religion unless, of course, you want that structure.

Spirituality is more flexible, opening your mind, body and spirit to places heretofore, perhaps, unbeknownst to you. Mediation, music, exercise, creativity, art, nature, music, relaxation, aromas, massage, chanting, scents, fragrances and foods enlighten your world without rules, regulation and procedures.

As there is with Religion there is NO calendar in your Spiritual world. Look at the calendar and you will see that each month there is some sort of, Religious or not, holiday, observation and customary event to celebrate. Except, of course, for August when everyone rejoices in summer. The calendar is your event schedule many of the events  add to the stress, anxiety frustration and panic of doing it right. Perfect DOES NOT exist.

Part Two

What have we done “to”, not “with or for”, our kids, et al?

We school them with tests, measurements and evaluations. We encourage or is it push them to excel with Honors, AP, IB, PSAT, SAT, ACT, Exams, Tutors, Tutors and more Tutors.

We structure their FREE TIME with sports, arts, clubs, teams and activities.

Example: When our kids were in elementary school the local town offered a half day day camp. Word quickly spread around town causing the inevitable race and panic to get those kids registered or else. Sign-ups were at town hall beginning at 8 AM on a Monday morning. My gut told me to get there early. I arrived at 7:15 AM and was about fifteenth in line. When asked, I was told the folks first in line arrived at 5:30 AM. Don’t want to be blocked out like the guy trying to place a bet in the movie The Sting.

I was one of only a few Dads. There were five Moms in front of me, none of whom I knew so engaging in conversation was remote. I did listen, however, and soon discovered the five Moms were “tag-teaming” responsibilities as they exchanged checks for payment for tennis lessons, swim lessons, piano lessons, karate school, art class, gymnastics, soccer camp, dance class, private baseball skills training and of course academic tutoring for their elementary age kids. Once the logistics were completed four of the Moms were dispatched to their designated sign-up and payment responsibilities. Each Mom left with checks in hand and a defined destination. To miss one sign-up would cause a “glitch” (don’t you just love the word “Glitch”, sounds so terrible) in their schedules not for the kids but for the parents who planned their days around their kids’ filled hours of activities. These were probably the same parents who placed a “sticker” on the vehicle, probably an SUV, indicating their child is an Honor Roll Student at  ?????? Elementary School. Yes I have seen those stickers. Who’s it for, the kid or the parent? Look at me!!! Look at me!!! Look at Me!!! The kid doesn’t even know what Honor Roll is.

The same kids maintain that drive to strive throughout high school. Next they are thrust into the debt creating world of college where they exist by the necessity to survive. Here is where they find out who they are or who they think they are at least as they were constantly told earlier in life. All of a sudden the valedictorian is in class with twenty other valedictorians and discovers “I ain’t that great” or am I. Quite shocking, revealing and unnerving to find out you’re not the best of all the rest even when you put yourself to the test. I’m just a regular person and that is okay or is it? An awakening is happening not for the kid who already knows, but for the parents.

College offers many wonderful, thrilling, exciting, challenging, rewarding, worthwhile, enlightening, enriching ways to learn and do things previously not approached. If they are lucky they can learn about themselves as well. How do know what is good unless you have experienced bad. Things such as making the bed, doing the laundry, taking out the trash and cleaning the shared bathroom are all part of self discovery as is accountability, responsibility and consequences. Oh wait, we hire people for that. Wrong move parents. When you do you are still enabling your kids and not empowering them.

College gives kids the chance to take root, grow, blossom and succeed. They actually feel good about themselves earning, not just receiving, affirmations for the work they do. College gives kids the chance to expand their worlds, explore opportunities they never knew existed and accomplish more than they ever thought possible. Kids achieve beyond their imaginations and expectations and still maintain grades, participate in events and, oh yes, indulge in the “social” component including gatherings, tail-gating and debauchery. They soon learn there is more to life than grades. Priorities!!!

Graduation. Celebration. A Goodie Bag. Travel. Work. Career. Education. Unknown. Undecided. Help!!!

Overnight kids go from a full plate of daily involvement, learning, growing, prospering and thriving. In one move they are back home in their rooms with only the illuminated screens to keep them connected to a life they created while away from home.

Home which has been loving, nurturing, accommodating, safe, warm, inviting and comfortable is still is the same as when the kids were younger. Only now a young adult has reentered the premises without the college world that offered support, freedom, independence, autonomy and empowerment. The plate becomes empty and in need of filling and fulfillment. Time to start over, not necessarily from the beginning but with new definition.

Example: Kids go from everything to almost nothing. Now the ugliness of loneliness, lonesomeness and being alone quickly sets in and eats away at the heart and soul of previously vibrant, energized and productive kids. Loneliness is everything it is cracked up to be. When the experts analyze, critique and dive into it they will discover that Loneliness is the root cause of depression, anxiety, stress and most everything else associated with our feelings. Medicine companies will deny this based on their experts and continue to prescribe doses to adjust our mood and feelings numbing them along the way. Why do you have to get numb to feel something? One possible solution is simple to say but a bit difficult to do, especially since kids are not in the built-in college Community where most everything is the readily available and easily accessible both, the good stuff and not so good stuff as well. One message or preferably one phone call actually talking with a real person, is all that is needed to get a game going or get some food. Best of all walking is the preferred mode of transportation. Community. Cities are being reinvented. Nobody will cook. Take out reigns. Life in a POD. Space, or lack thereof, will eventually replace Loneliness as the culprit for our woes.

Keep busy and indulge in the things that make you feel good about yourself. Keep away from things, and more importantly, people, who bring you down. Stay focused on yourself. You come first. Being alone is okay. You can shop alone. You can go for a walk alone. You can do almost anything alone. But when that is done and you are still alone, loneliness creeps in and consumes your spirit, energy and drive. Humans are social beings and we have the need to interact well beyond the illuminated and charged screen.

It sounds easy but we know it is not. If it were easy then everyone would do it and we all know that is not the case. Like everything in life it takes work, especially once you leave the cocoon, shell and nest of the life you created on your own but not alone. Nobody can play the game of life alone.

Now you are probably thinking where am I going with all this?

Time to blend Part One and Part Two. Remember “HOW” means House of Worship.

Part of Religion is to be a member of a HOW for all the reasons mentioned in the opening part of this BLOG Post. The HOWs cater to young families with children offering religious school, activities for the kids, charity and family events. HOWs also, focus on their more elderly and senior members nurturing them in hopes of receiving some, part or all of their accumulated good fortune which the HOW wants to receive when the Will is read. No cynicism here just the truth and facts both of which are my limitations.

Who is missing from the equation? Kids, ages 22-30+. The HOWS have little, most have nothing to offer this demographic. HOWs wonder why membership is down. All they have to do is look at the gap in those to whom their services are most needed. Nothing fancy. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just a person or small group of kids with whom to have lunch, go bowling, go for a hike, visit a museum, beach, white water rafting, zoos, board games, movie night or any of a number of activities kids once did in their youth. For more see my BLOG Post about BOREDOM.

In addition to the kids who move back home, consider the kids who relocate to a place for a one-two year program or job not necessarily school. Who do they have? Nobody except co-workers in their 30’s, 40’s and older most with families or struggling with their own stuff. Oh sure, join a gym. Many nice places to go and visit but who wants to go alone (maybe once or twice but wouldn’t it better, healthier and enjoyable to have someone with whom to share the experience?), eat alone, communicate with the illuminated screen which only darkens our day.

The HOWs are missing the chance to perpetuate their HOW, build their membership and provide a much needed service for an awaiting, eager and ready audience. When pressed, kids will tell us they need some help. Listen to the kids. If you do not hear their words watch their behaviors which are signals for help. This method may have not been needed in previous generations but in the present and based on what we have “to” our kids it is greatly needed and also much appreciated but they’ll rarely tell us that. Their smiles will let us know we done good!!!

Those who are hurting and longing for social connections to fill their time with positive, healthy, appropriate, familiar and fun stuff to do. Anything that evolves from this is a bonus, perhaps the start of a new family generation. Let the cycle continue. Listen to the kids. In most situations they know better than the elders.

I am, also, including the Military Veterans who return home from seeing and doing unspeakable things in unheard of locations in the name of freedom while others increase their portfolio amounts. Daily they struggle and suffer from all sorts of issues emotional, physical and environmental. They, too, are longing to re-connect with their “buddies”. By the way, the relationships developed during college and military life are essentially irreplaceable. Only folks experiencing those relationships can understand and appreciate the magnitude and depth of the human contact, energy and spirit that drives us. Daily, Military Veterans  are eliminating themselves from our world.

Next on the list are the millions of “Social Media” enthusiasts who are desperate for companionship. I have 500 friends and nobody to talk with, more importantly, nobody who will listen to me with understanding, empathy and compassion. No judging me since I need to get things out to somebody preferably not a stranger. Who will be my friend? Won’t you be my friend? Who wants to have lunch? That is the cry, plea and need of those seeking comfort, companionship and control.

How about the rest of us. What is there for us. We’re on our own. Unless we get lucky and find a safe place to be. Where is our next Community? What can The HOWs provide in addition to their taking?

Now it is time for me to beg, yes beg. I beg you, as you sit gazing at an illuminated screen in your cubicle, office or “bull-pen”, meandering through the mall glued to your hand held illuminated screen or in a vehicle, hopefully as a passenger, again aimlessly looking at your hand held or dashboard illuminated screen for directions to anywhere, I beg you to forward this BLOG Post to everyone in your connective world most of whom have, themselves, gone through the subject matter of this BLOG Post, know someone going through the ordeal and want to make everyone aware of the most important part of this commentary: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

The HOWs are part of the overall problem and can be, with a little effort, be a bigger part of the solution if they so choose. Reasons rather than excuses. Solutions not blame.

Loneliness abounds. We are reminded of it by well known artists namely The Piano Man, Sgt. Peppers Heart and Only the Lonely. You have make the effort not to be lonely, lonesome and alone. In order to get there first you must leave. Leave the loneliness behind you and build a beautiful, hearty, positive life for yourself, of course with a little help from your friends, real friends that is not the imaginary artificial created by electronics and rechargeable devices. Face to face friends. With you in the tough times friends since anyone can be with you when things are going well. Fair weather fans they were once known as. Love you while you are winning and leave when you when you are not. Friends. Define yours. You have that power. You only need one!!!

Pretty heavy stuff for a Monday. It came to me yesterday while chatting with a family friend of many years. Thank you my friend.

You can pick your friends. You can pick your nose. Please do not pick your friend’s nose. Hey, I needed that after writing this Mound of Manure. Lighten up a little.

Is This What We Have Come To?

Methods to Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

One day I was driving behind a school bus filled with kids driving home from a full day of day-camp.

Sitting in the way back seats were a couple of kids who were waving to me enthusiastically seeking my return wave to them I think the head jockeys call it stroking. Like when you say “hi” to someone and they do not say “hi” back to you. You gave one stroke but got none in return so you feel weak, left out perhaps overlooked insignificant, neglected making you feel you did something wrong. I have worked in places where the “leadership” walked right by me ignoring me, never making eye contact, lost in their own empty world. How did they become leaders. Isn’t communications an essential leadership quality? I wanted to wave back to the kids in the bus but had to think about it.

In different times I would have not hesitated to accommodate, participate and reciprocate their waves (Not the wave you see at sporting events). The kids were properly seated in their seats and not standing in the aisle. Safety first. In today’s damaged world I chose not to wave back. Sad isn’t it? It mean the bad guys have won or have they? The cycle will soon revert back to a time of trust, compassion and understanding. Let’s make this happen. Join the movement to civility.

I was thinking of my safety and how my participation in the wave activity might be interpreted or misinterpreted. Did the bus have cameras recording my license plate numbers, letters and my picture? Might my wave be interpreted as offensive? Might I put myself at risk by waving back? Who knows. Am I paranoid. No, just cautious. Cause today, ya never know.

It was disappointing to me for not feeling comfortable and confident to wave back. It might have been disappointing for the kids whose expectations were not fulfilled.

Example: When we were on a family car road trip our kids sat in the “way-back’ section of the station wagon (yes, I am one of those guys). They would wave to the cars behind ours and most often folks in those cars would wave back. We played the license plate game. My wife had a magnetized map of the USA and each time we discovered a license plate state we would call out its name and my wife filled the empty map space with the appropriate magnet. On two of our road trips we discovered cars from all fifty states, yes even Alaska, Hawaii and Canadian Provinces as well. We told our kids the Alaska and Hawaii cars might be rentals, were shipped to the contiguous 48 states or transferred here when folks were transferred by their jobs or the military. The Canadian vehicles crossed into The USA at the borders. We met a traveling family in the hotel pool, at night after dinner and their license plate filled a spot on the magnet map. That is how we “broke the ice” with those fine folks. They were from the colder region middle part of our country. The kids played and splashed in the pool and we adults, guess what, did the same thing. Our definition of fun. That was about 20 years ago. We still, occasionally, exchange yearly family updates at holiday time.

Back to the way-back. In addition to the passenger car waving, our kids loved to motion to truck drivers to sound their horn. The kids would pump their arms up and own signaling the truck driver to get into motion and sound, rather, blast the horn. Many truckers obliged and our kids reveled in their excitement. As the truck drivers would eventually pass our station wagon he would wave to my wife and I with a big smile on his face knowing he made our kids happy and maybe himself as well, by doing good for someone else, a stranger at best. One final blast of the horn and off he went. His truck must have been empty allowing him to accelerate past us.

Example: Most every night after dinner, clean-up, chores and oh yes the homework, when our kids were young, I would take them to the neighborhood playground. This gave my wife some quiet time to talk with her Mom, read a book and relax from her long day. I am not a hero just a guy doing some good for his family and selfishly for himself. Guys who bragged about not changing their babies diapers were never at the playground. There the kids would let off steam, run, play, jump, climb, slide, swing, get sand in their sneakers, get dirty from a muddy puddle which is great since kids need to get dirty and interact with other kids doing the same things. Some kids they knew from school while other kids were strangers only until play took over.

For as many kids playing there were just as many or more “grown-ups”, parents, grandparents, baby-sitters, a few nannies for those who could afford to out source some parenting and care-givers.

We all hovered, made idle chit-chat and kept an eye out for the bad guys who were the cause of the many adults in attendance. You see fear is a motivator. Safety first. The good news is that the town eventually installed a Port-A-Potty which was quite welcome since most of us were at the playground for about two hours waiting for darkness to send us home and to the bathroom. More importantly although the Port-A-Potty was vital, a local police patrol car and officer made a drive through the playground offering reassurance, visibility and safety. The Power Of One!!!

One night I knew I would be late in taking our kids to the playground. A neighbor was on her way to the playground. I asked if she could take our kids. Without hesitation, she did as I have done so often, by instructing the kids to “hop in the back seat, seat belts on. Safety first.

I arrived, by myself, at the playground about thirty minutes after our neighbor took the kids to the playground. I parked the car, approached the playground and felt dozens of pairs of eyes checking me out. Who is this guy coming to the playground by himself is what I felt. Most were the regular attendees who knew me by face if not by name. But, out in the parking lot by myself I could have been anybody, one of the bad guys. As I got closer some of the eyes veered away since there was facial recognition. But it wasn’t until I opened the entrance gate and our kids came running up to me jumping in my arms, Daddy, did I feel welcome and secure. Thanks kids.

This is Serious, NOT Very Silly

As you know  Marty’s Mindless Mound of Manure combines a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Some silly, some serious and usually a blend of both. Mostly I want to raise your awareness and have you think about my BLOG Posts and maybe have a chuckle or two as well. If nothing else I can be your supply of idle chit-chat, better yet, useless information you can use to fill time, break the ice and talk with your family, friends, co-workers, colleagues, acquaintances, neighbors and anyone else in your world.

After reading and listening to yet another example of mistreatment of people against people I must indulge in the most serious of human behaviors or is it misbehaving, to be kind but I don’t want to kind so here goes.

What happens to people when they get a little bit of power, authority. leverage, dominance and control?

Example: Take a regular person who gets up, goes to work, cares for their family, participates in community activities and is considered by most to be a nice guy. One day the nice guy gets a promotion at work to supervisor, manager, administrator or coordinator and morphs into a creature heretofore unbeknownst to everyone. The nice guy becomes a tyrant, watching performances, overseeing everyone’s day to day movement, criticizing workers for the most minute of infractions, constantly checking the time clock looking for an excuse to dock someone’s pay, publicly in front of co-workers insulting, berating, harassing and embarrassing not only the workers but the nice guy himself. Where did this person come from and how did they evolve. Perhaps, the new position is too much to manage, control and handle so they take it out on former work “friends”. Perhaps they get a perverse pleasure from abusing their underlings. Perhaps they are afraid of looking bad in front of their boss so they instill a culture of fear, intimidation and ridicule chasing morale and staff out the door. Look at the turnover rate of any organization and you soon discover why it is or is not happening. People stay in a job for many reasons but those with energy, drive, passion and ambition will soon find a place where they are appreciated and rewarded for their performances while the work bully maintains their lonely existence perpetuating the cycle and destroying the image and reputation of the organization which one day will discover their staffing mistake but at what price.  It takes a lifetime to build a solid, trustworthy and reliable reputation and about ten minutes to lose that hard earned reputation. One person can do all the damage. Most of the staff want to complain but are afraid of retaliation by “it”, the source, and management of course. It is only when the “it” does something against management that management takes corrective action. Lots of stuff is written about Leadership but few are actual genuine leaders. It’s not their fault or is it?

Example: During military service there was a nice guy who played cards with us, played some ball, had a beer, talked trash and did his job as well as most of us. He was well spoken with a bit of a twang and drawl in his voice, tall, athletic and convincing in manner. One day he is chosen as a squad leader and is given the symbolic rope which he attached to his uniform as a sign of leadership, not necessarily respect. Ooh!! ooh!!! look at me or rather look at my rope. I am somebody and you’re not. We respected the rope and all that it represented but we did not respect the former nice guy who turned into a tyrannical bully constantly from wake-ups to lights out yelling, screaming, hollering, cursing, badgering, harassing (just like sideline parents at their kids youth sports games embarrassing their kids) and in general abusing his power. Nobody went to him, nobody talked to him. He lived in the barracks with us but isolated from engaging in what formerly were time passing wind down rituals of social interactions. The responsibility that came with the rope was new to him and he resorted to tactics that were his demise at least with us. His supervisor marveled at his performance but was concerned about the morale of the rest of us. Gone was the joking, kidding, fooling around, laughter, fun, play and all the things we did to get through the day. Work was completed but with little energy, spirit and pride.The symbolic rope destroyed our former nice guy, us and the entire squadron of young men who were calling out for leadership. It was given to the wrong guy for all the wrong reasons which turned out to be excuses. It was not his fault or was it?

Example: Not it really gets ugly.

The bully comes in many forms but with similar characteristics. One thing to remember is that the bully was bullied way back when though the will rarely, if ever, admit to it. Rather they use an explanation not a reason or even an excuse.

The bully feels like he is on the lowest step of a ladder always looking up to nowhere. The bully feels lower than whale dung in the ocean. To elevate their position and status the bully resorts to tactics always verbally, emotionally and physically attacking the smaller and weaker as their target and victim.

Concern is given to the bully but what is there for the victims of the bulling who are scarred and scared for life while the bully continues to go through the motions of their miserable existence. The bully extracts the soul, spirit, energy and dynamics of life of their victims for the rest of the victims lives. The bully is shown and given sympathy. Oh you didn’t have friends, never got invited to a party, weren’t called on by the teacher (I’ll bet you were but chose not to participate out of fear and embarrassment of being wrong) always isolating, hiding in fear of the thought of rotting in their dismal life position in which they placed themselves with the help of the ones who bullied the bully. By the way, you can find sympathy in the dictionary somewhere between shift and symphony two words I choose to use as examples rather than the two words which may be offensive since I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. It’s never the bully’s fault or is it?

Example: This example is most difficult.

What happens to people (I’m being kind here with the word people), when they get a little power and leverage especially when it comes to personal and social relationships? Do they think they are actually as good as they have been told. Do they think this “relationship”position opens up opportunities not possible before providing opportunities to over step social and intimate boundaries especially by force. Some guys who couldn’t “score” in a bordello get a little power, they are now in control and you will do as I say, ask, command and demand or else_________________. We know what the “or else” is. And the cycle continues. Everything is good until it is not. Everyone is great until they are not. It’s everyone else’s fault or is it?

I understand there are those who are driven and attracted to those who have power, money, control and influence. I can live with that. But what about integrity. You know what integrity is? It is having the opportunity to take advantage and choosing not to. It is picking up trash or dog waste when there is nobody there to see you do it. You do it because that is who you are. Do you want to be around people with integrity or the shameless people who constantly blame the world for their condition and who take, take and take the heart, soul and spirit of their targets. It’s never their fault or is it?

The bully is everywhere. Slowly they are being exposed. They walk the streets. They are predators. There is no profile. It has no borders. It can be anyone based on the power of definition. When is beard a beard? After two days of stubble growth or does the beard have to be down below your multiple chins to be a beard? I don’t know and probably neither do you since there is no clear definitive definition (how’s that for redundancies?) upon which to rely. It’s an opinion and like a belly button we all have one. We are shocked when we hear the latest story of bullying, abuse, dominance, power and control. However, like most of the breaking news exclusive headlines, the more we here the same type of shocking stories thrust in our faces and brains the more desensitized we become. Like cursing, the more you hear so called profane language the softer it becomes. Hell and damn were used on television in the 60’s and panic ensued. Sponsors were boycotted. Censors went wild banning language. Words are just words and no meaning until they are given definition. Lenny Bruce, don’t take my words. Power lies in definition. You create something, you name it just like you named your kids which is where you had the power of definition. It’s never the bully’s fault or is it?

I may have previously written this. I can tell much about a guy by the way he handles himself on the field of play. It becomes apparent early in the game and as much as they attempt to alter their game their habits dominate. They make themselves known from their game which cannot hide the truth about character, dignity and integrity.. They play their game and show their temperament, sacrifice, teamwork, isolation, attitude, confidence and many more signals about their character or lack thereof. Just like when you are interviewing for a new job. All the experts say you and the interviewer know within a few minutes whether or not you will get the job. That’s why there is an incestuous fraternity of people who “gotch” your back, no not your back but theirs. Nobody has your back but you.

Especially in the national spotlight. They hide and protect each other and fill positions for their brethren qualified or not. Perhaps it is to return a favor or to keep sensitive and damaging information (leverage) away from the spotlight How else can a person who gets removed from a high level position surface in a similar level position or even higher in a different organization. Check their pedigrees and find the truth.

APOLOGIES:

I apologize for using “he” to represent all.

I apologize for rambling which is sometimes my style or lack thereof showing its ugliness.

I apologize to all those suffering and struggling with bullying, the recipients not the bully. For the bully please stop and get help. You’ll grow to like, love, trust, be honest and respect yourself which is when you can do the same with and for others instead of doing your bullying TO others. You may even be forgiven, hopefully not forgotten, though you may take forgiveness as permission to continue to bully more and more. It’s up to you. On an episode of MASH pilots who dropped munitions on villages destroying lives, communities and and property were taken to those former vibrant and functioning villages and shown the damage, destruction and chaos caused by the munitions droppings. If the bully knew the life long damage they caused perhaps they will find their heart and soul allowing them to return to a human and humane life, living instead of existing.

I need to do this: Gotta get some silliness in this post.

If a writer writes, a singer sings, a cook cooks, a teacher teaches and a driver drives does a plumber plumb, a doctor doc and a mason mase.

Free, Or is It?

A little bit of history to begin Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Of course there are EXAMPLES to describe the headline.

Example: Way back in the 1950’s and 1960’s in the downtown of my hometown, and perhaps many more, there would be stationed on each of the four corners of an intersection an attractive female with a welcoming smile giving out free sample packs of cigarettes. I think there were four cigarettes in each pack. She would do this mostly during the high pedestrian traffic times of the morning and evening rush hours during the warmer months of the year.

You would simply go up to her, extend your hand, perhaps offer a civil greeting and back then I am most certain you would say “Thank You”. If you asked, “can I have another”, can I have one for my friend, can I have as many as you can give me”, she would, most likely, accommodate your request. Greedy, yet, discrete folks would cross the street 3-4 times and get free sample cigarettes from as many of the women giving them out. This ritual would present itself for a week or two and then she would not be there. However, you liked smoking cigarettes so much you went to the corner store and made the purchase. Little did we know back then. We usually only consider the short term rather than the long term results. Since we had little accurate information on which to base our decisions we took advantage of the give-a-ways in a trusting way. Time heals some wounds and time wounds some heels.

Example: During this same time period manufacturers of toothpaste, soap, cleaning products, cereals and other household merchandise would send free samples (redundant isn’t it free and sample) to your home via the mail. Often, inside the package was a coupon you could use on your next purchase.

Example: In modern times, especially with food, free samples dominate. If you are of the kind who likes tasting free samples at the grocery store you arrive at mealtime and indulge in the unlimited amount of freebies offered, perhaps, engaging the staff in conversation during your stand-up meal. Here, too, there are often coupons offered for your next pruchase which the company hopes is today after you taste their products.

Example: About fifteen years ago I developed acid reflux (yuck). The doctor prescribed medication but gave me ‘free samples’ that lasted until my next visit whereupon he gave me more free samples. I did not feel guilty taking the free samples since I knew he received the free samples from the company sales representative who was probably vacationing on a tropical island as the sales contest winner for that particular medicine.

Example: Many banks offer free coffee while you wait. Candy, ice cream and beverages are offered at retail locations. The deli will offer you a slice of cheese or meat to see if it is cut at the right thickness for you. Food is abundant and everywhere. Once you know where to go you can go on a double date just the two of you. The double comes from eating free food samples in one or two stores and finding the dessert stores in your area.

Example: On a somewhat darker side, street pharmacists will offer free samples of the latest “feel good” non-prescribed (not over the counter) stuff at clubs, on the corner and at gatherings.

My cousin and I were walking the streets of a large city on a bright sunny summer day. We were followed by a street vendor who provided a non-stop list of his products offering free samples and “special deals” for multiple purchases. Finally, we stopped walking, turned to him and said we were not interested. He left us and proceeded to his next target. Throw enough stuff against the wall and some of it will stick (thanks Pop). I am most certain he made a good, yet illegal, living by doing this direct sales method not caring about his customers health, safety and well being. Sound familiar. Watch the news to find out that some legitimate businesses do the same thing but have experts prepare “written statements” justifying their position while they settle cases claiming no culpability, accountability and responsibility. Thus, no consequences. Not my fault is the cry. How creative is that. Pay a little fine and live off of the ill-gotten gain.  One ship, truck or car is captured carrying illegal stuff and while that vehicle is searched scores of similarly loaded vehicles go on their way and the cycle continues.

Example: The food court at the mall is a good place to dine for free. Get there around 11:30 AM or so and sample the goodies they hope you will buy. Not all the merchants participate in the hand outs but word spreads rather quickly as to who is giving our what. It is quite a spectacle to watch the choreography of those seeking a tasty treat for free.

Example: When we were kids, walking the boardwalks of beach towns, we would go into the many fudge and candy stores and boldly ask for a free sample which we most often received. They were small pieces and after a few free samples, especially the rich fudge, we went about way our playing on the beach and in the water. I”ll bet folks still do this. I know they do at ice cream stores, since I worked at three ice cream stores, with those tiniest of tiny free sample spoons holding what looks like a dollop of ice cream.

I am not too worldly these days but I am most certain you have more current examples of the chase for the FREE which is not really a chase since it is in your face most everywhere you go.

There is no free lunch. Eventually somebody pays something. Usually it is us who pays not only the cost and price but the consequences of falling prey to temptation.

Keep It Simple – Keep It Real

Join (for free) my movement.  No not that kind of movement.

My SLOW DOWN MOVEMENT.

I am so slow I have to speed up to stop. Not a bad way top approach life. Cars, trucks, buses and bikes have gears. Planes and trains have throttles. What do those things do, they CONTROL (from a previous BLOG) speed. Clock yourself. Are you constantly on the go asking yourself “where I am I going in this job, relationship, social situation and life in general”. Gotta get my steps in today, 10,000 should do it. Now I can go eat all those free samples and buy bigger clothes for retail therapy. The reverse of my Weight Loss Management and Control equation, again from a previous post.

In my SLOW DOWN MOVEMENT there is nothing to buy, no event to attend (though ya never know what might evolve) and certainly no “goodie bag” of more stuff to add to the clutter that you do not need.

All you have to do is SLOW DOWN and that you can do on your own unless of course, which is quite understandable, you need an advisor, coach, mentor, assistant, buddie, trainer and so forth. If that is the case I am available to do those things with and for you.

The MESSAGE

More messages from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Did you know You Cannot NOT Communicate? Everything you do is a communication whether spoken, written, gesture, the eyes or body language. With all these forms of communications we still have problems communicating. With all the rules changes umpires and sports officials have problems as well. And they have replay to right any wrongs yet are still vulnerable to mistakes. What did you see? Not what you saw. Now what did he say? I don’t know. Do you understand? Nope, do you? Two hours in a meeting and I still don’t know what’s happening let alone what was said (ahh Eminem’s Gibberish).

Next time you are listening to a speaker drone on you’re waiting for the speaker to utter those oh so welcome words: In closing. Finally. Last for now (oh no, is there a next time)? We remember the last of the speakers words because we have been promoted to prepare to leave. Bathroom. Snack, Chit-Chat. Lunch. Fresh Air. Loosen the tie.We walk the communications line between understanding and being understood. I am so understanding I cannot understand anyone not understanding me (Lenny Bruce I think).

We have text, instant, e-mail, phone, bird chirps and posts (like this) yet we continue to encounter miscommunications. We speak, write and emote in letters and symbols. Words, let alone sentences and paragraphs are obsolete. We don’t have patience for them. Quick. Fast. Inefficient. Done. Click Send. Like our food. Quick. Fast. Unhealthy.

Example: Messages of more than a few sentences are rarely completely read. Thus the opening for miscommunications. With all the debt saddled communications majors from college one might think we would have better communications. It’s like the computer, which when they first came on the market and popular (not necessary, like today) the world was going to save the trees since everything would be “stored and secure” (hacking was not around yet I think) and the need for paper would be greatly reduced. We use more paper now than back then. Copy. Copy. Copy. Everyone needs and wants a copy. The start of clutter!!! I didn’t know. You didn’t tell me. The first thing head jockeys tell you is you must communicate with each other. A revelation.

Did you get my message? If not, here it is again. I love you. Really I do. Is the “really I do” necessary. Really I do is a Meta Message (How about that one). Yeah, a message about a message. Why? Are we insecure? Fear of rejection? Fear of success? Do we not believe the original message was received? Do we need to make our message more believable and forceful? When you tell someone you love them that is all you need to do. I Love You says it all. Most of us wait what seems to be a lifetime to hear those words. When it comes from your heart it is sincere, honest and true. Imagine there are those who have never been told those three little words. Sad.

Communications: Mixed Messages. Lets’ go back to I love You. It becomes a mixed message when you are told I Love You followed by some form of inappropriate action such as a physical encounter. I thought you loved me. why did you hurt me?

Mixed Message; Telling kids not to smoke as you are hacking up a lung, with a cigarette pack visible in your shirt pocket, yellow / brown stained teeth and smelling like a full ashtray. You are not believable and a poor role model. Don’t say. DO!!! Lead by example. That’s what Leadership is all about not from a book, seminar, symposium forum, e-learning, lecture and workshop. Leadership is leading not talking about it. Communications is at the forefront of Leadership. Open doors. Accessible. Aware.

Communications Message: Trust: You tell your “friend”. I’ll pick you up from work at  10 PM. It’s 11:15 PM and they are still waiting for you. Here comes the excuses which from earlier posts you know are explanations for failures. Trust is broken. Next time I’ll get a lift from oobur.

Everything is fine, until it isn’t.

I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.

POWER Of ONE!!!

The “Power of One” Can CONTROL even for a little bit!!! You read here first from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure. No bull!!!

While driving along the raceway, highway and speedway erratically maneuvering through and about the multiple lanes of Interstate 95 between Dade County and Palm Beach County I noticed at a few points along interstate traffic would slow quite abruptly in a sea of red tail lights illuminating even the brightness of a sunny Florida day. Why, you ask. Here’s why.

Example: Positioned on the shoulder of the road was a parked marked police vehicle. As I drove past the parked vehicle I noticed there was no officer inside the vehicle. Just the police vehicle itself was enough to slow the speed and daring moves of drivers who needed to be slowed down. Of course, once past the parked police vehicle most resumed their race, pace and chase to their destination since they did not want to be late for something so important it required increased speed and risk, fueled by adrenaline, to reach their goal.

By making TIME your friend you can avoid the need to rush, hurry and take chances you normally might not take. When time is your friend you WIN in the game of life.

Example:

Say you get up late. You need to shower, shave and relieve yourself. You’re rushed which leads to perhaps a cut or two while shaving, not being patient enough to allow time for the water temperature to reach your desired level and you miss the bowl. Of course you never lift the seat or if you do lift the seat you do not return it to the down position. Sorry ladies.

While getting dressed a button falls off your shirt, you can’t find your belt, now where’s the other shoe and when you zip up, OUCH. Guys have all done this and it is a big OUCH.

You make it to the kitchen where there is only a sip remaining in the milk container so you search for an alternative beverage. No time to make coffee which could have been  prepared the previous night. What about lunch. Last night, as well, was the time to make it. I’ll get something at work. Oops no cash. I think there’s some crackers in my desk. Gotta stop at the ATM. Wait, no time. I’m running late.

Out the door. Cloudy sky. Better get the umbrella if only I knew where it was. In the car. Where’s the keys. In the house. I can’t get in. No keys. They’re all on the same key chain, fob or lanyard. Garage door. What’s the code? Have to call my wife. Where’s my phone? Got it. Down to 2% charge. One call is all I need. Hello. She’s doesn’t hear my call. I’ll text. She texts back with the code. In the house. Got the keys and wallet, too, which I forgot to take in my haste to Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!!.

Off to work. School bus, trucks, construction, rain (no umbrella which I did not get since I was distracted looking for the keys), red traffic lights. Oh no. I forget my briefcase with all the papers for my important meeting.

In the parking lot. Loads of rain. No close by parking spot only far away from the door. No umbrella. Soaking wet. At the office greeted by “Meeting cancelled” until tomorrow.

The greatest gift you can give someone is TIME. Give TIME to yourself.

Back to the POWER OF ONE:

Example:

In towns all over our country you will find the daily ritual and routine of getting to and going home from school.

In one town the daily schedule finds traffic proceeding smoothly during the morning dash and rush to work. Around 7:15 AM and 2:30 PM the CONTROL person arrives on the scene to maintain order and CONTROL of the multiple vehicular and pedestrian travelers.

The road is two lanes, one east bound and the other west bound. There is a turning lane in each direction and a cross walk for pedestrians. In addition to cars, trucks and buses there are parents pushing and some running behind their baby filled strollers, walkers and kids riding bikes. Even in today’s world you will find a kid or two riding a bike to school. Isn’t that great!!!

ONE person is in control: A Police Officer who manages everyone’s movement. No honking horns. No pointing fingers. No screaming out of windows. No erratic driving habits. No inappropriate behavior. Only CONTROL by the POWER OF ONE.

The Police Officer is in CONTROL. He directs the turning the lanes into and exiting the school. He motions for east and west bound traffic to stop and resume. He stops all vehicles when the crosswalk is in use. The Police Officer CONTROLS all this movement in a synchronized, choreographed, efficient and timely ballet of motion. The Power of One.

I have provided two examples but I am most certain you have your own but prior to now you may not have given it any consideration or thought. Perhaps Law Enforcement does theses type of CONTROL procedures not only to CONTROL traffic flow but to save us time, money, lost time at work and all the other inconveniences we can encounter by not allowing TIME to be our friend.

The Power Of One. You are the ONE. You have the POWER.

 How SMART are We?

Middle of the road sample from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

We have SMART:

Phones

Cars

Homes

Appliances

Watches

Furniture

Televisions

Computers

Boards

Cities

Water

Meters

Many more about which I am unaware since I am not smart..

We have Marcus Smart, an excellent basketball player, who is soooooooo SMART he just signed a multi-million basketball contract probably because he is Smart but, also, perhaps, because he surrounds, himself with SMART FOLKS which, of course, makes him SMART well beyond his family name. This did not happen by chance. We see Mr. Smart play the game. What we don’t see is the behind the scenes work which is all it is, work (maynard g. krebs) to us but for Mr. Smart it is passion, heart, desire, ambition, sacrifice, determination, resiliency and much more. We don’t want to hear that. We want to see the finished product and to be entertained for an hour or two.

I would chuckle when I heard about a “One Person Concert” coming to the sold out stadium. One person, no way, Hundreds of folks behind the scenes: musicians, dancers, lighting, sound, electronics, caterers, travel managers, make-up, business folks, drivers, crews of all sorts and many other people responsible to make it appear as advertised: One Person Show. We don’t care about all that we just want to see the show and be entertained for a couple of hours.

It’s like Thanksgiving Dinner. The hours of shopping, storing, prepping blended with 6-7 hours of cooking is all gone in about an hour when everyone is ready for a nap since Turkey has stuff in it, maybe natural maybe not, that makes us sleepy. Fact or Myth. Who knows. It is expected so it happens.

SMART People do not have all the answers but they know where to go to get the answers.

Example: Reference Librarians. They must wear ear plugs (not buds) to keep all that information is their brains. Pick a topic, ask a Reference Liberian and you will be given resources you never knew existed.

We have all this SMART stuff, but, sad to say, we have stupid people. Yeah, I’m in the group. At least I admit it. Will you?

When I was a kid, My Dad, brother and I were in the yard cutting down branches from trees. We tied the pieces with twine and placed them at curbside for pick-up on trash day.

Halfway through our chores we ran out of twine so Dad asked me to go see Mr. Kroll at the hardware store and buy a spool of twine, which I did.

Upon returning home Dad asked for the twine. I took the twine in hand and proceeded to tear away the protective plastic covering exposing the entire ball of twine as it unfurled right there. I did not know to keep the twine in the plastic covering so that it could be easily cut into a desired length. That was as simple task complicated by a stupid person, me. Dad said; “Geez, they teach you everything is school except how to live, exist and function in the real world. Not much has changed since then. In fact it has worsened with all the SMART stuff out there.

Instead of learning Life Skills through work, play, responsibility, accountability and consequences we use “experts” in everything to address, not solve, reduce or eliminate the concerns. We are offered resources, available on-line using your SMART stuff, instead of speaking with a Reference Librarian type person, which is a free service paid for by us and small in economic costs compared to hourly rates of the experts.

When things are constantly done for us (enabling not empowering) learning does not take place. Why? Because we learn from mistakes. Don’t touch the hot stove. I’ll show you. OUCH. I won’t be doing that again. As life progresses WE make it more complicated than it actually is by trying to be smart when we are not prepared since we did not learn how to do it the proper way. It’s only a mistake when we don’t learn from our mistakes which we, guaranteed, will make.

Don’t say you’re smart. Show you are smart. EXAMPLES = PROOF

 It an “Un” day

Make it a Marty Mindless Mound of Manure UN-DAY for YOU.

The following is brought to you by me, for free, and un-sponsored, for today is an un-ordered, un-structured,un-scheduled and random rant about stuff. Odd part is some of what follows is about control which for the next hour I am willingly relinquishing for the good of the guy at the keyboard and perhaps you as well. Let it go and you will grow.

Welcome to the Best of BLOG. Unlike “best in class” which I never was for many reasons though I didn’t settle for second best, put myself to the test and found out second, third and so on ain’t that bad. We all need to find our place and space. This is why I NEVER recommend a movie, restaurant or most anything except my BLOG since it is good for me and YOU. Why? Because of the Power of Definition. Who or what defines BEST? A Primate Survey. Questionnaire. Opinions. I read it on the Internet so it must be true.

How is it that every doctor recommended to you is the best, the very best (meta message) in his field. We all can’t be the top student. Somebody is number two. I was about 350 out of 360 and glad to have graduated. Nurturing my heart will tell me that’s good and find something artificially positive when in fact I had to face the truth that I wasn’t the best. I was okay with that and still am. Even modern day top ten lists have a number one and a number ten. Who makes that decision? Judges? I always questioned movie critics who tore apart, analyzed, critiqued, criticized and sometimes spoke well of a movie. I thought if they knew so much as experts, BEST, and were so critical they should make a movie and let us do their job.

Speaking of CONTROL. Was I? (not from Get Smart you TV and movie folks) I mean CONTROL.

Example: A baseball pitcher cannot find the strike zone when pitching in the game. His pitches are wildly all over the place and the batter, catcher and umpire are in the line of fire and fear the unknown. I know this because it happened to me. I played Fast Pitch Softball. My position was shortstop. One day our catcher did not make it to the game. The coach looked at me and said, “put on the gear” which I did without hesitation having never been a catcher. Our main pitcher could put the ball anywhere I placed my glove as his target. He did this with any of the four types of pitches he threw. He had CONTROL. In the middle of the game he was called away to report to his work location. Our second pitcher took over. He was wild off the field and even wilder on the pitching mound. He threw only one pitch, a fast pitch, which had no direction and never reached its destination which was my glove. He pitched to the first batter he faced resulting in the batter reaching first base via a “walk”. To the second batter he threw five pitches two of which made contact with my unprotected private region. The sixth pitch found the same private region. I threw off the catchers mask and told the coach I am going to back to shortstop. The coach made a few adjustments and since he was a player-coach he took over the catching but kept his guard up. He, too, took pitches to the privates but he was wearing protection. What happened here was the second pitcher had no control and was taken out the game.

When we get out of control nothing good happens.

Soooooooooo, I want to include another cliche to “Best In Class”.

“To The Next Level”. Progress. Advancement. Upward Mobility. Keeping Up. Drive. Ambition. Spiral Up. Spiral Down. Down goes faster than up. like money. It takes a long time to save for something and a few minutes to click “buy”. Disappointment. Let Down. When will we be satisfied. Want to see how fast thirty days go? Sign an IOU at the bank.

We all reach our own level of incompetence. The wise folks know when they arrive. It is un-settling. It is a conscious awareness of the end (definition) of their journey. Best of all it does not have to be permanent only a delay or time-out from the quest for “success” which has already been achieved and conquered only often we don’t appreciate what we have accomplished and take it for granted. The wise in awaiting must do that, wait. When you get it either on your own or with support, guidance and help you are empowered. There is no clock like in baseball. Only time, which must be your friend explained in detail in an upcoming BLOG.

Most artists are highly critical of their own work. I could / should have done this, or that. I could / should have taken more time, used different materials and so forth. But, rare as they are, artists create beauty from pain. We could all use a dose of that because we are all hurting we just have to say it ourselves and someone we trust. I always thank the artist for allowing me to visit the place where they live. I can’t get there without the artist.

To move away from the rant I will chant.

I know I can, since way back I would say I can’t.

Some Silliness – Some Serious – All Simple

Mundane Marty and his Mindless Mounds of Manure, continued.

*Points To Ponder as You Wonder What the Heck is This Guy Talking About?

*Also, a few tidbits of useless information from my vast warehouse and storage facility.

What we do good nobody remembers, what we do bad nobody forgets

It is not good to eat or drink on an empty stomach (huh)

In order to get there first you gotta leave (so Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!!)

What are the consequences of Peace?

Women will agree that there are never enough restrooms at the airport, train station, bus stations and many more places about which I, and probably most men, are not aware.

It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation and only a few seconds to destroy it.

We are not afraid of failure, we are afraid of success.

Without customers to service you have no business so please serve your customers. (deep breath, step away for a few seconds, overwhelm them with kindness, put yourself in your happy place and do whatever you do to relax when the customers are wrong which they are but we do not want to hurt their feelings so we let them “dump” on us which is, also, soooooooo wrong but we are driven by the dollar)

I stayed awake all last night to see if I snored and I didn’t.

When someone makes you feel bad they feel worse than you do only they don’t want to be on the bottom (feeling lower than whale dung in the ocean) so they torment, harass badger, intimidate and bully someone they know will not resist. They are the weak, meek and sneakily discreet.

I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.

Courage is fear that does not control.

I’m so slow I have to speed up to stop.

Don’t look at my methods look at my results.

What did Beyonce become when asked to marry? She became Beyonce The Fiancee,

I never forget anything I remember and I never remember anything I forget.

*Job Experience explanation:

Two folks are interviewing for one job. The Personnel Manager, oops I am sorry the Hiring Manager, oops my mistake again, I mean the Human Resources Manager, oops, I did again (like Brittany years back), I’m referring to The Talent Acquisition and Executive Management Team asks each applicant about their related job experiences for the past five years.

The first person, Joe from my BLOG on Weight Loss Management and Control, offers his story which includes starting at the bottom (entry level, do they still call it entry level?) and progressing his way the up by assuming added responsibilities, supervising subordinates (sounds so sterile doesn’t it) and holding the keys. All this shows growth, advancement and motivation. Joe has five years experience.

The second person, Tom also from my previous BLOG (remember let’s keep it simple), started his entry level work the same time Joe did, five years ago. Tom says he has five years experience, doing his entry level job, which he does only it actually is one year of experience times five.

If someone asks to borrow a tissue please tell them they can keep it. Who wants that back?

When using the bathroom do you take or is it leave “a __****__, (manure)remember you don’t take you leave. If you take you will carry it with you which  is fine if you have it stored in one of these environmentally proper doggie bags. You leave it behind since that is it place of origin, the behind that is.

You ‘Bout Ready To Play?

Major Movement ( in flat or sharp) from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

It’s time to play The Cliché Game but first “You Gotta Think”, thanks Ms. Franklin, Queen of Soul..

You know and probably use clichés which is our way to keep from thinking of more appropriate words to use. We are a lazy lot, at times. We settle for our fallback position of familiarity and comfort without having to think of a more creative, selective and fitting response. Clichés are the bread crumbs, corn flakes and helper fillers to stretch your thoughts without having to challenge your cranium.

The game is easy to play. All you have to do is copy the following list, I know another list but Wallechinsky, et al made boo-coo bucks a generation or more ago with The Book of Lists, so either copy this page or write the clichés on paper for yourself.

Next to each cliché put a check mark, or other symbol you like, (so many choices) next to the cliché each time your hear the cliché used. The easiest place to play this game is by watching any type of the so-called talk shows, especially news, sports, house repairs and food programs. This may be difficult since several speakers speak at the same time making actual listening and understanding a bit difficult, but once you’re in the zone and can focus on the clichés it will get easier. You’ll even learn about body language as they show their eagerness to jump in and take over the discussion because as we know what they have to say is sooooooooooo important. Opinions are like belly buttons, everybody has one.

Another good place to listen is if you work in an office with its constant distractions of meetings, phone calls, text messages, e-mails, social (a-social, remember) media and memos. All will contain clichés but meetings will have clichés repeated, repeated and repeated some more. You walk out of there brainwashed with clichés, confused about the meetings content and purpose often saying or thinking, “what went on in there”. Hopefully go back to your desk, locate this BLOG and add all the check marks you just heard at the meeting.

My Cliche List is not complete since additions occur at any time depending on acceptance, popularity, ratings, annoyance level and use or rather over use.

*Amazing (soon you will discover why this is at the top of the list)

*At The End Of the Day (awkward when this is said at midnight or later)

*Unbelievable (hard to believe this made the list. by default most certainly)

*Same Page (same page, different everything))

*No Brainer (nothing can happen with no brain, like nothing happens without the written product like a book)

*Like Money In The Bank (nothing is like having money in the back or money anywhere)

*Thank You Very Much Have A Nice Day (the cliche origin for me working at the deli)

*Lose The Battle, Win The War (no winners in war, except the profiteers)

*Lesser of Two Evils (Sort of looks like Elvis for those of us with Dyslexia)

*Outside The Box (’tis actually good but not encouraged, thinking outside the box, that is)

*Hearts, Thoughts and Prayers (sad that this has become the norm whatever norm is  except the guy in Cheers on the bar stool)

*Fought Tooth (Moose) and Nail (Squirrel) (who wins tooth or nail? (nobody)

*Gave It Everything They Had (giving is to make you feel good, what is this about)

*Hell Bent (anybody been there? so maybe it is not a straight road)

*Bring To The Table (food is always welcome)

*Impact (retract impact and use another word but not so much that it, too, becomes cliche)

*Happening In Real Time (is there fake time as there are fake many others things)

*Pull The Trigger ( image is frightening so let’s stop using this one, but they won’t))

*Good to Go (are you sure?)

*Flying Under The Radar (who of us can actually fly? maybe Radar in the 4077)

*Go To Guy (for what, get it yourself: empowerment)

*Love You To Death (opposites do not attract, nothing to love about death)

*Not On My Watch (it’s too little to hold anything though good for indicating the time)

*Good For The Goose, Good For the Gander (how do we know this)

*Your Goose Is Cooked (what did the goose ever do to gain such status)

*Good Job (kids hear this ad nauseum for the slightest accomplishment)

*Push The Envelop (only into the mail slot)

*Cutting Edge (ouch, especially paper cuts)

*The Whole Nine Yards (not enough for a first down to keep the drive alive)

*The Whole Enchilada (which I do consume when out to eat my favorite meal)

*State Of The Art (every state has art, unless art is new state)

*Slipping Through The Cracks (this one cracks me up. I fear losing my keys that slip thought the cracks of street water drains)

*Six Of One Half, A Dozen Of The Other (optimist / pessimist either way you have a six pack)

*Presence Of Mind (your mind is a gift not a present)

*Raise The Bar (pole vaulting anyone or is the corner bar being relocated)

*Word To The Wise (oh those potato chips a few words and a whole bag of chips)

*Give You A Heads Up (what a car is coming, we played lots of street ball)

*I Got Your Back (nobody’s got your back but you)

*Nothing Left In The Tank (you can still travel even when the orange / yellow light is on)

*Put All You Eggs In One Basket (too much protein and cholesterol for me, until a new study comes out paid for by ????)

*Hello. I’ m __________. I’ll Be Your Server Today (tennis anyone)

*One Hand Washes The Other (only 60% of guys wash their after using a public bathroom. Sure, doubt me. Look it up. I read it on the internet so it must be true.

*Anyone you call and are script greeted with: (always at dinner time or during Jeopardy or Wheel of Fortune)

Thank You For Your Call. This is ______. How May I Help You? How may I direct Your Call?

That’s enough. Even I am sick of clichés and can’t wait to hear them and others when I watch television or look at television. Which do I do, watch or look?. I’m not sure what I do except I know the cliché world awaits everywhere all day anytime. Listen Listen and Listen and you it will be “AMAZING” at what you hear throughout your day. I hope you put a check next to Amazing up top since I just wrote a cliché.

This just came in. Consider it a Point to Ponder:

How does that red line appear under a misspelled word. Where does it come from? It’s like a zit, it just appears. How does it know I spelled it wrong? More importantly, when that read line appears I know I failed just like in school when my work, and perhaps yours as well, came back to you with red ink all over.

 Difference Some Serious, All Simple Once You Get It

More from the Mind of Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

The Difference Between Women and Men. You ready for this. Women will agree. Men will say, yeah he’s right but I’ll never admit it. Those are the same guys who never  changed their babies diapers and brag about it. The same guys who don’t leave a tip at restaurants and hotels or wherever tips are expected. Why, ’cause they never worked for tips. Off topic once again but when the happy, silly and spot-on thoughts enter they must exit. This a good forum for me or anyone, to do so.

Let’s say two women are waiting for the bus or train. While waiting, usually instinctively,  they start a conversation about anything. Within ten minutes they will know it all. Top- Bottom – Inside – Outside – Backwards – Forward – Upside Down: names, kids, schools, jobs, men, where they live and work, struggles, stories about their Mother’s, cycle time, ailments, hair and nails. From there the breaking of the ice forms a unique bond which perhaps only occurs at the bus /train station. But, at least the foundation of common ground was formed.

Two men can stand in the same place as the women for twenty years and never get past: Hey, ya see the game last night?

Women get it. Men can’t, wont’ or don’t want to get there. Don’t want to show our vulnerabilities do we guys?

As always the best explanation is an example so here we go:

When our kids were born my wife had Birth Announcement Cards made indicating the name, height, weight, hair color, eye color and a simple welcoming message about our kids entering the world.

She mailed them to family, friends, co-workers and neighbors. She had a dozen or so leftover from her mailing and asked if I would like to mail an announcement to the guys I have been playing basketball with 2-3 times per week for three years.

I said “mail them out, I don’t even know their names. One guys is a plumber. One guy drives a big truck. One guy always shoots. One guy never passes”. Guys, we don’t get there the way women do. Someday perhaps.

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The difference between an offensive lineman and a defensive lineman. Guys will get this better that the one above.

A defensive lineman can rip a computer into a million parts.

An offensive lineman can put it back together.

I was defensive lineman. Nuff ‘said.

I could never be an offensive lineman. Too cerebral. Too many assignments. Too much to think about and remember. I was a put your head down and go guy working as a part of a synchronized team of defenders. I had fun playing defense and would not have had fun playing offensive though I did try it a few times. Not for me. Hey, I learned something about myself by doing this. Finding out what you like often comes from finding out what you don’t like. What a concept. Not the open floor concept of those television construction scripted shows but a concept about discovery of yourself..

By the way, throughout this BLOG and my entire BLOG it is never my intention to hurt anyone’s feelings which I am most certain someone out there will experience so let me apologize now if this happened to you. My apologies to all the offensive lineman. I am envious and respect what you do.

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The Difference Between: Enabled and Empowered

By now all of us know that if you take a person fishing you can eat today but when teach a person how to fish they can eat everyday since you are not there. Over used, over stated, over simplified and a bit cliche-ish. However it is a simple definition of the difference between enable and empower.

Parents empower their kids. When. When teaching kids how to ride a bike, tie their shoelaces, clean themselves after using the toilet, make their lunch, wash the dishes, clear the table, take out the trash, clean their rooms, say please, thank you, yes ma’am, yes sir and teach kids their ABC’s, 1-2-3’s, letters, numbers, shapes and colors before kids enter the school world so the teachers do not have teach those basics. Kids enter the school world empowered and ready for teachers to actually teach rather than begin with no foundation. It is the parents job and responsibility to prepare kids an the teachers teachers job to teach and not pay outiof their own money for school supplies. Where is all that money going. Administration maybe?. It is, also, the parents job to instill discipline, respect and manners for their kids so teachers can teach without distractions and interruptions. I know I am dreaming. Get rid of the electronics and see what happens. We all will be surprised, pleased and satisfied. I know I am right just like I know the protestors are right. It just takes a generation or two for the mainstream to realize it. Let me, right here, say that I use the word parents which includes grandparents, nannies, care givers and everyone else responsible for the kids health, safety, up-bringing and overall well being. Don’t want to exclude or hurt anyone’s feelings.

Now where was I. Oh those tangents which I never understood in math class but I go on one almost every BLOG Post. I hope they are informative and a little amusing just like me and my BLOG.

When we keep doing for kids, especially without limitations, boundaries and consequences they do not develop a sense of responsibility and accountability resulting in an environment of enabling and entitlement not empowerment. Think of the valedictorian in your school. The smartest kid, All kinds of awards, certificates, affirmations, successes with an ego the size of the classroom globe. What does this kid do. Goes to a college with a hundred or so other valedictorians to find out hey I am not what I was in high school. Gee, I thought I was empowered. Everyone told me I was the best, greatest, smartest, gifted and talented. Maybe I am not. Nah, not me. I am still all of that and more. Just wait my friend. Humble pie is awaiting. Be ready. It stinks and hurts but from there you can begin to learn, grow and prosper on your own which is kind of scary. We teach kids everything except how to exist in the “real world”. Now, how do you address an envelope? Where does the stamp go? How many stamps do I need? The empowered person does not have all the answers but knows where to go to get answers. The enabled person still doesn’t know what a return address is and why it is used. Hard to believe but it’s out there.

How do you know what is good if you never experienced bad. Lets say your life is perfect without ever being told that perfect does not exist. You are an academic success, all star athlete, good looking, envied by all, hated by some as well. Live in a beautiful house, (not a home, read below please), have beautiful clothes, go on vacation and so forth. One day you wake up and there is a pimple on your face. You hide in shame afraid to be seen. Uncomfortable in your own skin. Oh the humiliation and embarrassment just from a simple (get it) pimple. Yet another drift away from the topic but still appropriate.

All simple stuff right? Remember my BLOG is Keep It Simple – Keep it Real.

Simple works best. I am a simple guy which is why folks get along with me. They like the simple things in life.

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The Difference Between: Winning and Losing

Why did we lose? We were not prepared. We did not practice. The referee did not like us. It was too cold. We did not listen to our coach. The other team cheated. The spectating rude, crude, and socially unacceptable meddling parents were screaming, hollering, yelling, cursing, badgering, harassing and annoying everyone at the game while distracting and embarrassing us, their kids. Hey parents am I describing you. Not many but I know you are out there continuing to act and behave disrespectfully. Shame on you as a person and more importantly as a negative role model to your kids.

Why did we win? We practiced. We prepared. We listened to our coach. We  followed the plan. We went the extra mile. We overcome obstacles. We made adjustments duirng the game. We respected the game. We were determined, focused and resilient. We communicated. We did not blame anyone or anything. We were lucky. The ball bounced our way since sometimes we do not win, the other team loses. Like in tennis keep the ball in play and let the other player make mistakes.

The first paragraph is EXAMPLES of excuses which describes failures.

The second paragraph is EXAMPLES of reasons which define success.

You make the choice for you. You gonna’ provide reasons or excuses?

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The Difference Between a Home and a House:

When I was a kid we would visit our grandparents.

One set of grandparents found us sitting on the couch with those plastic skin ripping covers, not allowed to touch anything since we might break it and never ever go into the kitchen for a drink or food. Wipe your feet on the outside doormat and take off your shoes upon entering the house. Speak when spoken to. Never utter anything while watching their shows or eating a meal. Do you know how many sneezes, belches, yawns and farts I held in. It’s a miracle I did not explode. Finish all your food regardless. I never used the bathroom since I might make it dirty outside of the bowl. This was a HOUSE, a sterile and antiseptic building.

The other grandparents was a HOME. A comfortable, welcoming and inviting HOME. A little dirt and dust in the air and on the floor, a dish or two in the sink, leftovers in the fridge, boy were they good. A junk-room to hide and play in with all the stuff on shelves, in boxes and on the floor. A place for imagination and discovery with all that stuff. Fun stuff. Always a filled refrigerator accessible at any time. Family sleepovers using beds, couch and floors. We made a “fort” using towels, blankets, pillows and sheets as the frame and tables, chairs and desks to hold things upright. Everyone knew you were in the bathroom by the sound of the flush which echoed and reverberated throughout the HOME.

There was love, nurturing and encouragement in both places. I prefer the HOME which is what I hope I made for my family.

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The Difference Between Recovery and Prevention:

There are two guys: Joe and Tom. Just random names so do not be offended if I did not use your name. I suppose I could have used my name but I didn’t.

Joe is fifty three years old and has a heart attack. He goes to the hospital. The doctor tells Joe to drop 30 pounds, quit smoking and drinking, begin an exercise routine, eat healthy and sleep more.

Joe begins the journey to meet the challenges of conditioning his mind, body and soul to achieve his goals. Joe joins a “health club”. Joe is now in RECOVERY.

While on the treadmill Joe meets Tom. They begin a conversation since they share some common ground by being at the health club. Of course, you know this is in direct contrast to the opening entry in this BLOG’s Post but let’s continue anyway.

Joe asks Tom, “Yo, how yuh doin”? Sorry for this but I grew up in Philly. Yeah, I know the Eagles won the Super Bowl.

Tom says great, how about you?

Joe, a bit nervous but he figures what the heck, says, “much better now” and proceeds to tell Tom about his heart attack, hospital stay, advise from his doctor and plan to get and stay healthy.

Tom, also in his fifties, says to Joe, ” You sound like you’re doing what I do. I have been active since I was a kid. I watch what I eat which is routine after all these years. I quit smoking in high school. I never got used to the smell of tobacco on my fingers which was more disgusting than when I would pick my nose and all I would smell is stale, nasty and funky tobacco from my tobacco stained digits. I indulge in a cookie or two or a scoop of ice cream a few times each month. Since I hated that septic tank mouth taste in my mouth I quit drinking a year or two after high school. I do not miss the junk food, tobacco or alcohol and the burdens it brought to my world.  Water is my friend and has been for many years. I am at the gym 4-5 times per week for my 1-2 hour workout and when not here I go for a walk 1-2 times per week sometimes on the same day as I visit the gym. I am doing everything I can to avoid a heart attack and more. Tom is in Prevention.

See the difference? I hope you said there is none. Correct.

Joe is in Recovery. Tom is in Prevention. They do the same or similar things.

The hardest part of Recovery is knowing and learning that you are not the only one. There is a half a world of folks who are in Recovery. The other half is in Prevention. All of us need to be in one of the two groups.

Beat BOREDOM, The Enemy Of Us All

Many are Mine, those magical moments from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

I’m soooooooooooo BORED. Nothing to do. Same stuff, different day. Everyone is doing something but me. Oh, woe is me.

Ever say any of that. Sure you have. We all have. Question is, what are doing about it?

First thing you do is shut off, put away and avoid all your electronics. I have 500 Social Media “Friends” and nobody to talk with since we have become an “a-social” society by relying and depending on Social Media. That is why “Communications” is a college degree program (which results in a new word: Debt, sometimes hundreds of thousands which is a terrible way to begin adult life, in debt that is, but we keep pushing kids into college instead of taking a year or two away from school to work, volunteer and learn life lessons which they could have learned on the field of play as kids but were too BORED.) where kids learn all about communications without having conversation, writing skills, face to face contact and other old fashioned more traditional methods of commuication which is actually talking sometimes in complete sentences. Oh what’s that. You must still have a Flip Phone. Sorry, actually I am not, for the rant. I hope I did not hurt anyone’s feelings.

Do you know the word “Phubbing”? Soon Websters will include Phubbing in their list of new words. So you are actually talking with someone face to face engaged in a conversation when the buzzer goes off indicating your cell phone has or is receiving a message. You look at your phone instead of maintaining focus and eye contact (Oh I forgot to take my meds to help me focus) with a real live in-person person while still distantly engaging in your conversation. Hold up. I gotta take this. It ‘s important (and you my friend are not). Yeah Okay. Got it. Meet you there in five. Sorry gotta go. Meeting my best friend for coffee. Wanna come. No. Okay. See ya. Whew, what just happened. Phubbing is snubbing your “friend” with your phone. Phone-Snub. Get it? Again sorry for the tangent rant though it is related somehow to the topic which I forgot. Oh yeah BOREDOM. That’s the world. Quick. Microwave. Abbreviated. I think some have stopped reading this BLOG. Prove me wrong, please

When we were kids we just went out and played even let our imaginations, remember imaginations, create something different not necessarily new. One time a new kid moved into the neighborhood and brought a game. We never knew of this game, but after its introduction, played it all the time. The game involved a round rubber ball and a broom stick which we got by unscrewing it from the bristles,. We called it stick ball. From there we went to wire ball, curb ball, step ball, wall ball, punch ball and half ball (when the ball was ripped or torn) all using the same ball.

What happens as we age. We become consumed with existing rather than living, and forget about what gave us pleasure which of course was play. Not all of us but many have forgotten their youth and the importance of play which now we think and talk about but unfortunately rarely do. Forget trying to figure out the excuses (failures) why we do this and focus on the reasons (successes) we can, should and eventually do something, anything positive, healthy and let’s not the forget the most important part of play which is FUN!!!

Examples are the best explanations so just look around and you will find folks riding bikes which has morphed from a kids play activity to a humongous worldwide business as well. Don’t you just love the weekend riders in their “gear” and sleek, stylish and expensive bikes. If that makes you feel good about yourself then Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!! Stop being a cynical bystander, criticizing, and finding fault in others. Instead go your way and do something for yourself.

Many are members of a “club” which is a form of group which offers socialization, interaction, conversation, structure, camaraderie, support, involvement, activity, exercise and fun. Sounds therapeutic to me. I’ll bet most rider folks look forward with great anticipation, excitement, energy, enthusiasm and expectations all week at work and home anxiously, a healthy anxious, awaiting for their time with like kind folks, meeting new enthusiasts, sharing common ground and having some fun. I’ll also say that most watch the weather forecast well in advance of their weekend ride. Uh-oh washed out. How to fill the void. That is why it is good to have back-up plans just in case nature interferes with your fun. Time to take our play indoors.

So bikes are not you but something is. Here is yet another teenie-tiny partial list of Things To Do To Beat BOREDOM, The Enemy Of Us All. Remember none of this or anything else includes and involves your electronic stuff. Each category below has sub-categories which are way too many to mention here. Let me know if you need help finding Things To Do To Beat BOREDOM, The Enemy Of Us All. I will simply ask what did you do as a kid for fun and play.

General Categories: Sports, Museums, Art, Music, Dance, Chorus, Quilting, Volunteering, Home Repairs (stop putting it off), Arts and Crafts, trace your family history, night school and much much more, too much for here. By the way, we once had hobbies, what happened.

Weight Loss Management and Control

Major Moves from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Want to beat your battle with the bulge?

Want to feel good about yourself with pride and dignity?

No pills, potions, powders, videos, memberships or anything else advertised as THE solution to an epidemic.

First get a physical examination from your doctor as well as your doctor’s approval for using a weight loss management and control plan. Tell your doctor about this weight loss management and control plan. Above all listen to your doctor’s advice.

First, after you receive approval from your doctor to pursue this weight loss management and control plan and your goal, go to the store and buy a comfortable well fitting pair of sneakers, walking shoes or similar footwear product you choose. Next, buy some comfortable shirts, shorts, sweats or whatever “work-out” clothes you prefer and comfortable fitting socks.

Second, is to go for a walk in a safe, secure location in your neighborhood, at your local high school if they have a track which most high schools have, a park on a trail or paved surface or a location of your choosing, remembering safety first which includes the weather so be aware of the forecasts. Take a bottle of water, some tissues to wipe your brow and a watch of some kind to keep check the time. Take a thirty minute walk to begin with and increase / decrease your walking time as you decide along with your doctors advice. Leave your electronics at home and enjoy peace, exercise, serenity and nature. Look at the sky, observe the birds, smell the flowers, look at the ground (maybe you’ll find  penny or two), nod your head, smile and say hello to fellow walkers and enjoy the experience. Keep an extra bottle of water in your car for the ride home or better yet, get to your walking destination by walking.

Third, is to eat smart and eat healthy. Manage and control your portions. Reduce or eliminate the two most dangerous white powdery substances: Salt and Sugar. I know, I know they are so good and I like them, but just know that they may not like you as much. Also, lose the alcohol, tobacco and other unhealthy stuff to ingest.

Eat the foods you enjoy and a variety of them. Create your own menu. Use the internet to find healthy recipes and sources for the foods you like to eat. Hey, guess what, please please please do not deprive yourself of some goodies once in a while such as a scoop of ice cream not a half gallon, a couple of cookies not the entire sleeve or a sliver of pie or cake rather than a slice or slab.

Here’s the simplified and somewhat over simplified secret:

Eat breakfast like a king, loading up for the day, lunch like a queen, refilling for the day and early evening and dinner like a pauper running on almost empty.  Fresh fruits and veggies for snacks. That’s it. Plain and simple just like me. Go to bed hungry and wake up hungry. Let the math do the work. It is a simple equation: Reduce the amount of your food and beverage intake and increase your expenditure of energy which is your walking exercise. Throw away the scales, tape measures and charts. You know it is working when your clothes become loose on your body eventfully sagging and falling down by themselves requiring you to go “new clothes shopping “yeah!!!”, which for many is just as beneficial, desirable and maybe, just a little therapeutic. Also, go to the stores for your purchases which gets you up, out and going instead of clicking through the stores.  By getting out of your home your going to a destination where guess what, you will walk some more!!!

Most important is to stay hydrated which is the current cliche meaning drink lots of water. So what if it interrupts your sleep causing you to go to the bathroom at 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning. Stay hydrated. Water works best as we all have been told by the experts.

Time: We eat, sleep, work and use the bathroom everyday, well hopefully everyday if you know what I mean. Perhaps by regularly exercising and eating good stuff your regularity will return. So why not exercise everyday. I know it is impossible to do so with everyone’s over scheduled schedule but get out there as often as you can and make it happen for YOU!!! The difficult takes some time, the impossible takes a little longer.

I do this for myself, especially the regularity part, but there are no guarantees it will work for you. All of this sounds and reads easy, which it will be for you once you surrender to success and make it happen for yourself. However, if it were easy then everyone would be doing it and we all know that is not the case. You become the exception, a leader of yourself rather than a follower. You become empowered rather than enabled. You succeed rather than continue to not.

Yet Another List!!!

Move on for more of Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

Well, here it is. Another tidbit of useless information from my vast warehouse and storage facility. This one comes to you in the form of list ’cause we need another list of stuff to fill the void in the great abyss of animal manure.

To enhance the workplace environment, making for happy workers, building morale, keeping pace with production and output and nurturing the hearts and soles of the those seeking such try using this list to make it happen.

Everyone is happy when they are

*Paid Well

*Mentored

*Appreciated

*Promoted

*Involved

*Trusted

*Challenged

*Respected

*Valued

*Empowered

*On a Mission with Purpose

Now you have another set of “tools in your tool bag” (oh, those rotten awful clichés) to lead, guide, direct, inspire and motivate folks to accomplish more than they ever thought possible and some fun along their journey to success and beyond.

The Importance of Play Regardless of Age

Many and Much more from Marty’s Mindless Mounds of Manure.

When our son was in summer day camp I would pick him up around noon. At home we would eat lunch and he would relax until 2 PM when he and I would ride bikes, swim or attempt to fish at the mud hole.

This got old real fast and I knew I had to do something. I went back to days of youth. My wife and I got on the telephone and sent e-mails to the families of the kids from day camp who I knew were in town and probably struggling with the same boredom as my son and I.

Our message was simple: Pick-up baseball at the park. Bring your glove, bat and water. The first day nine kids showed up and I did infield and batting practice with them. By the third day 26 kids showed up ranging in age from third to ninth grade. I appointed two kids as managers/captains. They had to choose teams fairly, make the batting order and assign field positions which were to be changed every inning or two so that each kid had the chance to play as many positions as desired. I did the pitching to keep the game moving.

Kids came on foot, by bike, on scooters, and by car. Parents could stay or they could do whatever they had or wanted to do. I scheduled the game to go from 2-4 PM when parents would arrive to take their kids home. No one wanted to be first to take their kid home and many were the times that we played until 6 PM when I would take the initiative by shutting things down.

One of the Mom’s brought Ice-Pops one day. I politely suggested she take them home and use them for another occasion since the kids did not need a sweet treat they needed a healthy meal, a bit of rest and then back to the park with their buddies do Play ball, ride bikes, climb a tree, play Man-Hunt or just be kids.

The kids went home tired, hungry and ready for tomorrow. Often I would get calls at home from kids and parents wanting to know if the game was on for tomorrow. This is what kids should be doing. Playing without the yelling, screaming, hollering, structure, trophies, pictures and goodie bags. The kids were outdoors where they belonged having fun, resolving their own issues, learning about life and just having fun at play.

On the weekends if there was a game I let other Dads, who were busy during the week, get involved and be part of the action as I sat back and watched. At first they wanted to do everything manage, organize, control, badger, harass, frustrate, annoy, holler, yell, scream, etc., as they did when they were coaching but soon learned and were encouraged by me to back away and let the kids be kids.

All those kids are now in college, many have complete their undergraduate degrees, are planning their futures or working. When they around and we meet their first remarks are about the great time and fun they had playing “Pick-Up” baseball at the park.

Let me go one step further into adult Play.

When our daughter was an infant she was what is known as not a good sleeper. For her and then our son, an hour or so was sufficient sleep resulting in our kids being up almost every hour on the hour for an hour. My wife “expressed’ her milk and I fed the babies so my wife could sleep. Remember sleep deprivation is everything it is cracked up to be.

Throughout my life I have always played pick-up ball mostly basketball and, in recent years, soccer. I have very limited skills, talents and abilities, however, the guys are kind to the old and feeble and let me play even when I do not bring the ball. I have my aches and pains but the pain of not playing is far worse than any pain I have learned to endure.

Now back to our daughter and her sleep patterns. I was getting desperate for physical activity aka PLAY. I tried going to the park and schools at various times on many different times of the day or early evening. Nothing. No game. I was quite shocked. I knew there had to be a game somewhere.

He who seeks shall find. But this time It was not me who did the finding. My wife and infant daughter went to a neighborhood Mommy and Me “Play-date” (Note the word Play) where the Mom’s could talk, vent and otherwise receive unofficial treatment and therapy for Motherhood.

My wife was on one side of the room and heard the word basketball coming from the other side of the room. It is the radar Mom’s have that tells them which of the four cries the babies are doing preparing me and hopefully other fathers as well, to change a diaper, feed the baby, hold the baby or put the baby in the crib for a nap. Only Mom’s can tell the four cries apart. Nature is quite beautiful and wonderful. Fathers are beautiful and wonderful when they do what is asked of them by their wives.

My wife dashed to the scene of the word basketball and quickly asked: “Where’s the game, my husband is desperate”. My wife got the details, gave me the information and the next night I was playing pick-up basketball.

I went to the school gym ahead of given time. I immediately knew who was in charge and went up to him asking if I could play. I told him I did not want to take another guys spot, I would pay the fee and I can bring a ball. He told me, “son you’re in. I pay the fee and bring the balls. There is always room for another player.” He was from Indiana and a big Hoosier at heart so he knew the value of my concern, situation and desire.

I played with those guys for four years. Then, all of a sudden, there was no game. My Hoosier basketball friend had passed away and nobody picked up the slack. I saw a couple of the guys and we managed a few games at the playground but that too fizzled after a few nights of play.

One night I drove past the park and there was a three on three game with two of the guys being my former basketball playmates. I parked the car and got into the game. We all knew a few other players and within two weeks we were running full court twice at night during the week and in the early mornings on Saturdays and Sundays.

That was twenty five years ago and the game is still on. I am the last of the original crew still playing but have “recruited” or rather found or they found the game, many players. The next generation is playing with us many who grew up in town. Some are the kids from my pick-up baseball venture. They play and often will bring one their buddies. The game is open to all.

We play during the school year sometimes using both gyms in either of the two schools where we play. The summer game is off and on but it gives me a chance to rest the old and aching body getting ready for September. I only want two things if life: The Truth (hard to get) and Another Season (Life) especially basketball.

That was Pick-up Baseball with kids and Pick-up Basketball for the older folks.

Now it is time for Pick-Up Soccer.

Both our kids played Youth Soccer.

One day a few of us parents / coaches arranged for a game against our kids. It was well attended and afterward a few of us said “why not get together for a Sunday morning Pick-up soccer game”.

What started out as six v six game quickly spread to a full field game with often enough players for three teams of 11 or 12 players each where we rotated at 15 minute intervals.

As with my Pick-up baseball and Pick-up basketball games the game rapidly spread by word of mouth, the very best form of advertising and promotions since it has built in trust. For the past fifteen years we have had an international showing of players from South America, Europe, Asia, The United States, The Middle East and a few of the Island nations.

The games are Wednesday evenings and Sunday mornings. When a holiday occurs such as Thanksgiving or Christmas, yes Christmas, we get a full field turn-out most of the time. Guys want to get a good workout and sweat before they indulge in their family feast.

Many are the languages that are spoken but the common language is that round soccer (futbol) ball which unites nations, people and especially the kids when they come to play.

Different guys bring different connections making it possible to play year round weather permitting, on artificial turf with goals and nets.

Here too, many of the younger players I know from youth sports come to play. When they are in town they know where to find the game.

I told you I have very little basketball skills but I have fewer soccer skills. Here again, the guys are kind to me, many of them not knowing the local origin of the game they are playing and the game they love having been born into the soccer culture and society.

Perhaps, just perhaps, if kids had more time to PLAY there would less or maybe none at all of the symptoms, behaviors and actions associated and attributed to ADD/ADHD, Focus, Anger, Trust, Frustration, Concentration, Less than desirable Academic Performance, Achievements in school, and relationships with family and “friends” (I have 500 friends on FACEBOOK and nobody to talk to or even who will listen to me).

Perhaps. just perhaps, all the Life and Coping Skills learned on the field of play: Teamwork, Competition, Organization, Promptness (the game is at 2 PM, if you are late you sit and wait) Listening, Leadership, Empowerment, Critical Thinking, Awareness, Sharing, Manners, Protocol, Time Management, Playing by the Rules, Discipline, Resiliency, Determination, Fun, Laughter, Smiling, Humor, Silliness, Respect, Conflict Resolution, Getting Dirty and not have someone in your face brushing you off, Accountability, Responsibility, Consequences, Winning with Pride (not jumping up and down) Losing with Dignity ready for the next game, Confidence, Succeeding through Struggles, Overcoming Obstacles, Conquering Concerns, Building Self Esteem, Learning how to Learn by playing the game and much more would all be reduced or eliminated without the need to send the kids to “experts”, head jockeys, therapists, counselors, specialists and so forth. That is the POWER OF PLAY.

Perhaps, just perhaps, schools and teachers could go back to teaching, real teaching  while removing BLAME from the school staff and putting it back where it belongs: in the home with the parent(s).

Perhaps, just perhaps, when kids are given the time to get out the school building, PLAY, run, jump, yell scream, holler, chase each other, climb something, kick a ball, jump rope, talk with and to each other, get away from all the screens, distractions and adults (except for a few staff for safety purposes) academic achievement would increase, behaviors would be appropriate, success will be gained,

Perhaps, just perhaps, if the parts of the school building could be open and available during the most needed times such a Summer. Christmas Break and Easter Break ,since not everyone goes to Disney or Skiing, kids would a safe place to PLAY in the gym, create in the Art Rooms, Read a book in the Library or do some supervised crafts, engineering or computer projects. Volunteers would flock to the scene to be part of something good for the kids. Now, we know of course, most kids do not want their parents overseeing everyone for many reasons mostly embarrassment opportunities which for the weaker parents is always a concern. Parents must remember it is not about them it is about the kids.

When you talk to and with kids. When you listen to kids twice as much as you speak, thank you Mark Twain. When you give kids the greatest and most useful gift possible, no not a goodie bag, trophy, team picture, uniform, snacks, latest and most expensive gear making them appear like you want them to appear and not as kids. The gift of your TIME is most precious, valuable , appreciated and needed preparing them for their futures. When do all that and, of course, a little bit more you EMPOWER Kids to accomplish more than they ever thought possible.

So there it is. My way, guaranteed to meet with resistance and ridicule from all the experts who recite study after study after study with all the evidence, statistics and proof that it works their way best. Everything is fine until it is not. Basics stay basic and the basics are what satisfies needs. Kids need the basics so they can thrive and survive. I am aware that part of today’s basics include technology in many forms but let us include Play in that formula as well. The results will be overwhelmingly positive. The basics are time tested and proven as well only they have been forgotten by the current leadership, decision makers and policy scribes. PLAY is a basic. PLAY is the new normal whatever normal is. OH, the power of definition.

Folks like the simple things in life which is why they get along with me.

Healthcare: Bought and Paid for by US!!!

Much More from Marty’s Mindless, or in this case, not so Mindless, but still a Mound of Manure.

My plan will raise the money to pay for Healthcare for all legal United States Citizens.

United States Population: +/- 300,000,000

Guesstimate of people of 21 years of age:  150,000,000

Change the law to age 18 and the eligible numbers rise.

Limited weekly bet $10.00 per person

Limited yearly bet $520.00 per person

Gross Income:            $78,000,000,000.00

Expenses (15%):        $11,700,000,000.00

*Net Income:              $66,300,000,000.00 (before winnings paid)

Overhead including salaries, benefits, rent, utilities, insurance, furniture, fixtures, equipment, telecommunications, supplies, maintenance: 10%-15% or less of the Gross Income. Keep it simple, streamlined and solid!!! This is a high percentage but I would rather start this way since it is easier to come down than go up.

Weekly Guaranteed Payout:             $25,000,000.00

Total First Year Gross Payout:         $1,300,000,000.00

*Total First Year Net Income:       $65,000,000,000.00 (after winnings paid)

Registration by subscription can be completed by mail or ON-LINE.

Subscription Registrations can be for 1, 5, 10, 15, 20 and 25 years. This way all the money is collected up front and even with a modest investment return of 2%-3% revenues will increase steadily even if subscriptions decrease.

Using similar State Lottery models the National Lottery can make payouts for matching all 6 out of 6 numbers which results in one top prize winner of $25,000,000.00 for that week. If there is no 6 out of 6 winner then the top prize money gets divided among those with 5 out of 6 winning numbers, then 4 out of 6 winning numbers and down the line until all $25,000,000 of the weekly prize money is distributed.

ALL WINNING PRIZE MONEY IS DISTRIBUTED IN LUMP SUM PAYOUTS WITH NO DISCOUNTS FOR TAKING THE CASH!!!

ALL WINNING PRIZE MONEY IS TAX FREE!!!

ALL WINNING PRIZE MONEY IS DISTRIBUTED VIA ELECTRONIC MAIL DIRECT DEPOSIT!!!

National Lottery drawings are held on Wednesday nights at 10:00 PM right in the middle of the week.

On a quarterly basis, create a two or three page newsletter updating the people with accurate information as to the whereabouts of their money and what benefits they are receiving for their inclusion in the National Lottery. Have the newsletter available at local Post Offices throughout the country.

By the way the name of the National Lottery is “To Your Health Lottery” since that is the purpose of its creation. Instead of quenching your thirst and toasting to your health let us quench ourselves with a safe bet not a gamble. You can raise a glass of something (preferably water) when you see your winnings statements

That is my plan. Plain and simple just like me. A bit different, somewhat unique and certainly not just another “Me Too” band-aid type solution to a very serious national problem. The critics, doubters and cynics will certainly disagree and find faults and flaws in my plan. I expect this and have encountered these attitudes my entire life personally and professionally. 

There are a million and one excuses why my plan will not work and only a few reasons that it will, which is all that is needed. Please note that excuses explain failure and reasons define success.

What has to be done is to work the numbers and sell my plan to those in positions of influence and power who make the decisions that affect us all. Adjust all the variables and create models for each adjustment that will result in the elevation of the actual net dollars available to pay for National Healthcare. For example, by raising the maximum wager to $25.00, or higher, per person instead of $10.00 per person and setting the minimum age to participate to 18 years old then the numbers become even more staggering than those I have presented.

Finally, please realize that gambling is part our culture as is evident from Bingo Halls, Racetracks, Sports Gambling, The Stock Market, Raffle Tickets, Lotteries, and Casinos. So why not provide a way to help quench America’s thirst to gamble while at the same time providing a solution that so many of us worry about on a regular basis whether we have health insurance or not. My plan is a prime example “Of The People”, “By The People and For The People”.

Someone reading this is the person who knows the person who can make my plan work. Remember you are usually just two calls away from getting to the person with whom you need to speak.

“Never Can Say Goodbye”, Thank you Jackson Family.

I never say goodbye, it’s too final. This is the place where we don’t want closure, however, we all will eventually have others say Good Bye when the time comes to move on.

Better to say Bye and Bye which means I’ll see you again, I’ll see you my friend, Bye and Bye.

Just as Manure is produced every day, or at least every other day or sometimes twice a day or whichever empty’s the innards, YOU can be sure that Marty’s Meaningless Mounds of Mindless Mindful Manure will continue to be the Maverick who Majestically Maneuvers YOU through the Maze of Life while Maintaining a Modest Means of Motivation, Moving YOU with a Measure of Melancholy and Maturity.

That’s all for now Folks. There’ll be more sooner than you think!!! Bye and Bye.

Poetry?

Po-eh-tree

Po-eh-tr-eye

Po-eh-trie

Phirst Phaze

Simple – Silly – Sincere – Supportive – Stuff

Dedicated to, an all-inclusive, everyone nationally, internationally, globally and universally to avoid hurting anyone’s feelings.

Three of My Handles, since the White Shadow has been used in a 1970’s television program called The White Shadow.

*Sir Farts-A-Lot

*Aging Raging Caucasian

*Immature Amateur

Intro: Silly jokes:

Question: Why did the football coach go to the bank?

Answer: To get his quarterback.

Question: What goes up when the rain comes down?

Answer: An Umbrella

See we just broke the ice. Quite Nice. Silly, yet effective.

The following, not to be taken seriously, three writings in bold were created during my twenty years working with a diverse group kids in a residential drug rehab. It was my way of breaking the ice with kids who were scared, scarred, abandoned, abused, neglected, forgotten and struggling with drug abuse, family issues, legal issues, mental health, relationships, education, self worth and things the person on the street never experienced or knew existed though in today’s world things are a bit more out in the open.

They thought for an old, fat, balding white guy it wasn’t bad though they did shake their heads in dis-belief when they heard me free style.  Kids who heard my words before tried to warn the new kids many of whom were polite and chuckled.

With me you wanna do battle

I’ll make you cry like a baby without a rattle

In a canoe without a paddle

On a horse of course with no saddle

Tell on someone their tale you will tattle 

No matter where

As far out there as Seattle 

I’m a big piece of leather

Well put together

Can go out in any kind of weather

Like birds with feathers

Like multi color varieties of heather

Or a ball you can tether

In any kind of weather 

Wetter and wetter

Better and better

In the cold wear a hoodie and sweater

Be a go getter

Went to the beach and ocean

saw a big commotion

folks forgot their sun tan lotion

what they need is number 9 love potion

By the way, I have created ART: Mental Health Healing. It is a piece of display Art with an accompanying narrative and is based on my work and personal experiences. If you are interested I will email you my work should you choose to provide a working e-mail address.

________________________________________________________________________

Somewhere and somehow pieces of the following can be assembled to create a new movement and message for the many who could use a boost. Eminem tore it up with his early work. The time is right do it again. Pardon me while I go Lose Myself………………………

My initial collection of:

Simple – Silly – Sincere - Supportive - Stuff

I"m hurting

In pain

don't know if I'll ever get back in the game

would like to ride The Dukes A Train

wish I could play ball, like dick "night train" lane

hope he's in the canton ohio hall of fame

if he's not what a shame who to blame?
nice to ride with gladys and the pips on their midnight train

I will refrain from using a refrain

stresses the brain

unlike today, what a strain

when fingers are pointing one at me

whilst three point back at thee

go ahead take a knee

count to three

time for a reprieve

lose that anger and hate

it's' never too late

give yourself time and a break

even for you bullies

we'll bake a cake

better than going to a wake

like archie clark with his sixers shake and bake

not sitting on the fence with repeat, for pete's sake

can't prevent fires by using a rake

of all this, what do you make

that I should jump in a lake  
better to be transparent than opaque

_____________________________________________________________________

I cry at night from fright

Fear makes me Uptight

I delight in your site

It’s my own fight

I’m usually wrong

Kids and you are always right

I need to hear J.J.say dynamite

Listen to Rudy as Dolemite

_____________________________________________________________________

Knock knock knock

It’s time for me on tick tick tock tock

Put down the phone, your clock

Later you can check your stocks

Time for your cranium to unlock, not be blocked

Yeah, you can wear unmatching socks

Bet you can’t just get one of those nasty chicken pock

Dads nickname was Da Rock

A. Bunker worked on the loading dock

Day to day the grind

Never ahead always behind

______________________________________________________________

Some much anger in the world

Time to give it a twirl

Be proud let the flag unfurl

Stomp it, burn it, tear it, disgrace it

We know you don’t give a shout, no doubt

But bit by bit

Slowly you turn

Letting evil return

_________________________________________________________

James is 

Gold is

Savings is

If word is bond

Why ain’t there fish in the pond 

Do we look to Harry with his magic wand

______________________________________________________________

No trust in leaders

Turning us all into bleeders

When we should be readers

Oh where is Jeter

I tell my wife I need her not for show

But To grow, prosper and learn even though when we dance I step on her toe

______________________________________________________________________

The giant tower

Has deflated our power 

Hour by hour 

We march, yell, screen, fight, destroy 

When we should be building for every girl and boy

_______________________________________________________________________

Life has no sequel

According to doctrine were all born equal

But are we not 

Feel the pain, walk in shoes, where is the empathy

Don’t want or need sympathy

Seems to be loads of apathy not by us regular folks

But from the top, distant removed

Who never were in or feel the groove

Yeah, you might be watching this on tick tock or youtube 

________________________________________________________________________

There is no trust

The world is in a bust

Because if the unjust

We leave

Ashes to ashes

Dust to dust

Wind takes us away in a gust

We’re all hurtin

Decaying from pain caused by rust

In your heart, like Jimmy, you can lust

________________________________________________________________

Talk talk talk

Blame blame blame

We’re out of the game

Wild cannot be tamed

Simple like walk-in in the rain

Or ridin the train

For some sadly things are going down the drain

Oh the pain pain pain

_________________________________________________

Desperately seeking heroes

The world is total ground zero

Sandwiches are hoagies subs grinders poor boys zeppelins and a Hero

Look inside and around

For some it might be diniro

heroes are there, they appear

No need to look far

In your home

Not the streets you roam

Maybe we should put away the phone

Make a commitment to atone

Even if it makes you groan 

You can do it you’re grown

No need to forgive and atone alone

__________________________________________________________________

Conversations start with

Do you remember When...

Granny took brother to pick dinner chicken, turkey or the cheaper hen

Sadness, despair, depression variety of anxiety 

In our livers over and and over again again and again

When will it end the pain of not knowing when

_______________________________________________________________

Most once had youth

When the choice was Hershey’s, Kit Kat or a Baby Ruth

Talking with your full

Is soooooo uncouth

Careful not to chip a tooth

Always always always relentlessly seek and speak the truth 

_________________________________________________________________

I got more soul than I can control 

Give me some butter I’m on a roll

Happy for Nick Foles 

Kids should be rolling down the hill doing a jelly roll

It’s free no toll 

Where’s the fun, silliness, laughter, humor, play

Don’t go, stay and play play play 

Not all day You need a rest study for the upcoming test

Work hard not be a pest

Most of all be you, unlike most of the rest

Learn from kids who often have the right things to say

Go about your business in a steady healthy way

____________________________________________________________________

Powerful influential leaders 

Masters of illusion

Obfuscation

Causing confusion 

Making us think it’s our delusion 

Bullies are the bottom 

Though some make it to the top

Then they drop

Damages the cause

We can now pause

Regroup

Gather ourselves

Feel the calm

No more sweaty palms

When is it time for alms

I am Ford

Cross the stream, fjord

Who is your lord

Not me, Marty Ford

No need to turn ploughshares into swords

Vote in your district, town, city or ward

Cut the cord

It’s yours and everyone’s reward

Power rangers called their zords

From where they overcame evil and wicked

Listen to the music of Wilson Picket and ride your mustang, dance 1000 times and do it at the midnight hour, that’s power 

___________________________________________________________

The words of Eminem 

Whose mother, a female, is “feminem”

M’s words today are more appropo

To help in understanding and recovery so in a battle we can go toe to toe

His genius is him being in the know when a decade or so ago

His words opened a generation to grow grow grow

It started with “nowadays everybody’s talking like they got something to say”

You know the rest

His words are darlin, like Carlin

Both these guys should be out catching a marlin

M is here George is gone

Pioneer Lenny fought the battles 

Some day I’d like to visit Seattle 

______________________________________________________________

I watch the games

On a cable channel

Anticipating the guys on the

Pre game and post game panel

Their insight, knowledge and wisdom have no peers 

Even though they have aged extending their years and rears

Maybe too many doughnuts and beers

All great guys with whom I want be around

Included in their banter, chit chat and sounds

____________________________________________________________________

You can’t win unless you scam, hustle, lie, cheat

Bribes, graft, corruption look away turn the other check

No need to repeat

Politics, business, sports, education, government

From the pipes in Detroit's dirty water

To the rich buying their way into prestigious college doors for sons and daughters.

Those who have leverage

Choose your beverage

That’s a sin

Tell it the guy holding out asking for you to fill

His cup of tin

___________________________________________________________________

Not into gambling

Just giving a sampling

Of My rambling

It’s a wrap or is or rap

Avoid the trap and the clap

Cover your yap

Play by the rules set forth by the Experts

Dad was Al, Mom was Gert

On this project not too much energy did I exert

By the way, 

I’m no expert

Just an aching, aching, arthritic old guy

Who wants to give this new technology a try

Often I wonder why

Why not

Swing for fences

Going around the bases

In my home run trot

I, like, you have something to say

Without cliché

________________________________________________________________________

COVID

We will never know who thus did

In total of it, we can be rid

Time to cover it with a lid 

Ask a kid who in the corner once hid

Business in a race to win the vaccine bid

Untested, unscientific more than likely untrue

Guinea pigs are me and you

I’m feeling blue dad bo dado

Don’t wanna turn green then cry

Oh my

Where are the spies

Makes you wanna cry

Why oh why

Gee I’m glad cows don’t fly

Cover your heads

Hide under your beds

Monsters can’t get you

Under the covers

Protect your sisters and brothers 

___________________________________________________________________

Somebody always knows

Makes us think keeps us on our toes 

Like a ballerina, have you seen her

From the harbor in pearl

The twin towers

Pandemic

The ruthless it’s endemic

Lies made Pinocchio's nose grow

A fairy tale story

In there is the glory

There’s always more to the story

Like seven rings won by Robert Horry

_______________________________________________________________________

It’s nice to meet cha

By the time kids are in 5^th grade they’ve hundreds of slices of pizza

Nice work being a greeter

Some like it sweet

Most like it sweeter

On the surface we often teeter

Inside, deep and deeper

We are weak and weaker

Keep it all stuffed in like a holiday dinner

We know what it takes to be a winner, even a sinner

Right versus wrong, it’s a fine line 

Not to worry

Everything works out, in TIME

The difficult takes some time

While the impossible takes a little longer

It’s how you become strong and stronger

_________________________________________________________________________

Lies-Misspoke

This is no joke

Break the egg, get to the yolk

Used – Pre-owned

Old – Vintage – Antique

What has happened? 

If this is how we speak

Words set you apart make you unique

Make it brief like a tweet

Trouble with retention paying attention

Perhaps no “time out” detention leads to suspension

What do I owe

I trust you

You’re in the know

From whom do I learn, prosper and grow

Folks know their rights for which pioneers risked everything and fought

Folks don’t know or care about responsibilities perhaps they were never taught

Oh the distraught

It’s nothing you bought

With you it was brought

Have to pick up the pieces

Get in mind and body healthy shape, get taut

Free us, we who are overwrought

____________________________________________________________________

When it’s hot in the pool you wanna take a dip

Be careful don’t run avoid a slip

Might bust your hip

Or cut your lip

That’s a bad trip

There was Wilson who was quite flip

Shameless has its Phil-lip

As mentioned before we know of Gladys had her Pips

Life can be rough and tough to get a grip

Catch things early in the bud problems you can nip

I’ve never been hop or hip

Though I listened to the gang from the sugary hill

Now all I do is take doctors pills

On hold are the thrills than give me chills

I must chill 

Be careful so I don’t’ take a spill

___________________________________________________________________________

Biggie said It was all a dream

Pak dying was a scam, sham, scheme

Can’t get got from an unloaded magazine

Not too hefty but certainly not lean

Gotta build the self esteem

Eating fine cuisine

In that limousine

The king with his queen

Always on the scene

I like triple c’s

Chocolate chip cookies

With Vanilla ice cream

Let off some steam

Looking goods, looking clean

Even when you have to scream

Never could do the balance beam

It seems

Need a low rise inseam

Gives me, in the eyes, a sparkling gleam

_____________________________________________________________________________

Wanna Succeed? READ READ READ

That’s the creed

Something firm is what you need

Including the religious bead

They fill a need

Take the lead

Work, if you must, till your hands bleed

Own you home with your name on the deed

Soon legal will be weed

You don’t need to be sleeping to fulfill your dream

But keep it real, keep it clean

In all nations

Get your education

Elevate your station

Live love laugh

Excel at math

Follow your path

Lose the wrath

In your heart

Do your part

Even, if over, you must start

Maintain youth

That’s’ the truth

Need more proof

Watch fiddler on the roof

______________________________________________________________________________

Old

Don’t want to retire

C’mom Jim

Under me 

Lite the fire

Okay to perspire

Still got the desire

Jackie will lift me high and higher

Brother was editor of school newspaper the town crier

Cites in ruin like the wire

Nobody will hire

On the hunt, never tire

Speak the truth when it hurts, don’t be a liar

Da man working not for you, as they conspire,

During service on the ground only 10% are flyers

The cup was in Philly for the 73 and 74 flyers

To keep us down 

To the ground and below

Tough to dig a grave in the ice and snow

Tough road to hoe

A boat without oars can’t row

Work smart and upon you honors will bestow

Cackling like the crows

From head to toe

You will make it as you learn and grow from what you know

Grow to great heights

In your delight

Going from dawn to night

Show your might

Never give up the fight

__________________________________________________________

I’m a freak

Like a bird with no beak

Silenced need to speak

Old age and bones when I move creak

Can’t stand for long in the creek

Playing ball again seems bleak

Pain free to be I seek

My words are unique

Like those of Immortal Technique

Technique’s got the magic, the mystique

He’s the real deal

Imagine how he feels

He’s on the level, Dancing with the Devil

Cry from his pain, it’s in the refrain

Country’s in its point of no return

Lies, corruption, scandal 

For most, too much to handle

Feel the burn

Are we at the point of no return

Kids today will never know

How great we were

A generation ago

Learn some history

Knowledge will free the mystery

Everything today happened in the past

On many issues we are still last

Can’t we all just get along

Is a cry that for many who need to belong

Mentally and physically strong

Voices are heard

Need a new song

______________________________________________________________________

Behind the speakers on tv

Filled bookcases abound

From the ceiling to the ground

Inside can be found enough to make

A pound of ground round

Scholarly intelligent educated

Is that the way we were created

Grammatically correct it should be “created equally”

Cant’ let that go 

Can’t let that be

As to why like most things

It’s a mystery

That’s me to the “nth” degree

If you were in the know

You would agree

Ever been stung by a bee

On their way to the hive attached to a tree

Understand Wounded Knee

What will make for a unanimous universal unifying decree?

_____________________________________________________________________________

Who’s been a retail clerk?

Maybe began years ago as a “soda jerk”

Nothing original to say

Oh well, go back to the predictable pioneer cliché 

Thank you very much, have a nice day.

Kids are lost, don’t know how play

Over use, abuse, puts me in a rage

Essential oil “SAGE”

Like Mighty Mouse

Red and Green Rangers said “I’m on my way”

To try and save the day

Ever notice that car colors today

Are black, gray, white, tan, cream and beige

______________________________________________________________________

Once the remedy

Was a dose of comedy?

Made us think, chuckle, laugh and smile

What we now have is different in content and style

May not last a while

No more than four years of tears

Elevating stress, anxiety, worry, doubt and FEARS

No place to work it off so our girth will expand including our rears

Which comes from more than just a few beers

Many a loss well before their years

At what do we laugh?

The sight of a giraffe

A llama wearing pajamas

Does it step up a notch

What is funny about referencing the crotch

Do kids play hopscotch?

We don’t laugh at ourselves

People busting and doing the dozens on their own

In a different tone

Can’t do it today

Folks will be reeling

Remember be aware not to hurt anyone’s feelings

_____________________________________________________________________

Why do lies spread faster than TRUTH?

Is it uncouth to talk with a mouthful of Baby Ruth

Careful not to crack a tooth

Would like an second chance at youth

Examples are always the best source for proof

Ever use an 8 foot high Pay Phone Booth?

Like mushrooms

Kept in the dark

Away from the light

Know what it’s like with fight or flight

No delight

That’s right

Blocks your clear vision and sight

Fell like JJ exploding with DYNO-MITE

Lost and confused, feeling used and abused

Where’s the Truth, what can I trust to be right.

Hiding Behind shades, standing in the shade

Rather be looking for gators

In Florida’s Everglades

Thought I had it made

Don’t know why I’m so afraid

Not like a “hide under your desk” air raid.

Vertically Challenged

Ain’t got much height

Not white the delight

Certainly can’t dunk

Cane barely touch the bottom of the net

I’ll get there on this you can bet

Silent letters, double letters, spelling rules

Don’t know, feel like a fool

Tough to learn the language we thought we would love

Kids from Europe speak 3-6 tongues

Helps them climb to success on the ladder: Rung by Rung

We’ve destroyed our native tongue

Reduced it to a pile of manure and dung

Lost its allure

I have ailments for which there is no cure.

______________________________________________________________

Wanna have fun

Get a dictionary

Read and learn 

All the definitions of the word RUN

______________________________________________________________

When do I

Read

Create

Write

When is the time right

Can’t sleep at night

Like NOW

WOW

I’m tired, but juiced and wired

Maybe soon I will hear those magical words: You and Your Work are HIRED

Way different than being laid-off, terminated, eliminated and fired

Don’t ever want to be retired

_________________________________________________________________

Kind of a romance

Like those shooting foul line free throws 

Doing the celebratory dance

A tap or a glance

James said, “I got ants in my pants and I gots to dance”

This ritual

Keeps the audience in a trance

The pass sets up the shot

Defense wins the game

Hard to do

Easy to explain

One street side is dry, while across has the rain

Waste Waste Waste

In the landfills and won the drain

Throw things, especially FOOD in the trash

Out there are folks who turn the tossed into CASH

They’re the ones who make the big splash

My favorite ice cream, why of course: Heavenly Hash

Don’t know if it is still made

Perhaps the name was changed 

New rules / laws 

The name might come back

When it does

I’ll take, like pancakes, a Double Stack

No better a snack

Most others in most ways do lack.

Who’s had?

Diarrhea

Pyorrhea

Gonorrhea

Wanna go to North Korea?

___________________________________________________________________________

Can’t sleep

No help from Lil Bo Beep and her sheep

I roam around

Feel like a creep

Like trying to walk down a hill that is too steep

Into the river, but not too deep

Just enough to cool off

Up to the feet

______________________________________________________________

To whom do you go for support?

Once there was Eddie Feigner the King and his Court

 Go an all inclusive non-USA beach resort

Watch the “news” see the constant reports

For what was done there is no retort

Monsters can’t get you; you’re protected under “blankies” when building a fort

Monsters are real, look like just another guy

They get their way try after try after try

Protected, secluded, hidden

We need them put away and from society, ridden

No kiddin’

Bring to justice those who ruined families and lives

Get them off the streets, in backrooms, one on one

Where they thrive

Put them in room and open a bee hive

Oh the pain

The life they took

Can never be regained

Stain – Stain –Stain

No need for a refrain

The message is clear

Hold on and keep close to your kin

Who are your sincere and loving dears

Cleanse them from those who have committed the worst of worst sin

_______________________________________________________________

Lower case e.e. cummings wrote 

Maggie & millie and molly & may

went to the beach to play one day

Like Lil Richards Miss Molly

I sure like to ball, in a different way:

Base

Foot

Soccer

Basket

Volley

Golf

Tennis

Racquet

Stick

Wire

Step

Curb

Wall

Half

PLAY teaches many a valuable life lesson

Educating – Preparing - Empowering folks 

Like cookin’ with Wesson

In life with you

Ain’t nobody gonna be messin’

Result, less stressin’

_____________________________________________________________________

Gotta close this session on a happy note

Like playing poker holding a full boat

Not gonna mention The Vote

Have an umbrella to Tote

Do things by rote?

Giveaway your old coat but don’t gloat

Eat tooooo much, feel the bloat

Are Jordan and Brady your GOAT

Know anyone who went to Choate

Careful for creatures when swimming in the mote

Don’t know from who or is it whom, Here’s a quote

“That’s all she - he – I -they wrote”

______________________________________________________________________________

Cards are from hoyle

Best to get is a flush that’s royal

False folks act Loyal though they want us to think they are royal

Arrogance, Anger, Greed, Power, Apathy, and Narcissism comes from reduced size as a result of a Mohel

Everything touched turns to dirt and soil

Especially for those who labor and toil

Until their blood will boil

No time to re-tool and change the oil

Is anyone loyal?

Leave it for the dump

Can’t make it over the hump

Overfill can’t be helped by a sump pump

What we doin’ “for” our kids with debt

From our past did we forget?

All the regret making that college bet

To be put on a set

Everyone needs a safety net

TNT has Ernie, Shaq, Charles and Kenny the Jet

Miss their show on tv, yet

Find them fast on the internet

No need to get upset

With eyes that, from fears and tears, become wet

For comfort, we all need someone to pet

Wanna a sure bet?

When in public or confined in a jet

If some had their ways we’d being say NO as “nyet”

Folks with the flask

Refusing, not wearing a mask

Such a simple task

Its easy keeping apart

Eliminates the odors from the fart

To avoid gout drink cherry juice that is tart

good for the soul, spirit and maybe the heart

I have a degree

But no pedigree

Is Education the vehicle to set us free?

Sad isn’t it

What happened in DC

Kent State and Wounded Knee

Spend an eternity

Really? Wanting into that fraternity

Like a cover charge to keep us out

No doubt

Who told us to twist and shout?

What would life be

For you and me

If we all could just along 

And let it be

Need more folks like Lennon, Denzel, Spike, Pac

Rodney and Martin Luther King

Telling everyone to do the write thing

Nature will care

For the forests, mountains and seas

No need for a rake

I prefer a black and white cookie

With the same blend milkshake

Is it all a nightmare bad dream?

Or a hate fueled mistake

By one who never got picked for a team?

Living large but really small

On the brink

Of, I won, I think.

Lenny begged the judge

Don’t take my words

Would you take the jump shot

From Larry Bird

Y’all heard, absurd, word!!!

Have a voice

Let it be heard

  drink ripple, boones farm and thunderbird

What’s the price?

50 (fitty) twice

Coming from your fears

Payments in arrears, oh dear

Things are cloudy, unclear

Solutions are near

Can’t do it alone

Pain when I groan

I’m all alone

Scared to pick-up the phone

In this nightmare I roam

Need to sit on my bowl, my throne

For my sins I will atone

Then after the fast, enjoy an ice cream cone

Taste so good

Legs are hurting, like walking on metal and wood

Want to, but can’t go back to the old neighborhood

Wouldn’t do no good

It could, it should but it won’t and can’t

Calm comes from a spiritual chant

On I go with this rant

Strong like the ant

One leg at a time putting on the pant

Players, Oakley and Grant

On the hardwood floors they trolled

 playing their role

ever skip a highway toll

cream cheese, peanut butter and jelly on a roll

the roll, with no hole

McDonald, Winwood, Cocker, Medley and Hatfield: Blue Eyed Soul

Obtain, Retain and Maintain CONTROL

music, art, exercise, talking, listening, LAUGHING all will heal

no need to make a deal

let’s keep it real about how you feel

lighten you load made of steel which nobody can steal

you will seal your deal

from the seat pf power, dominance and control 

comes indecision

probably caused by a botched circumcision

clouding vision

quiet and quell activism 

resulting in division

putting everyone on course doomed for collision

sapping spirit and soul from thoughtless incisions

what fool call me a fool, keep to yourself your derision

time for change and revision

The Power of One

The “Power of One” Can CONTROL even for a little bit!!!

While driving along the raceway, highway and speedway erratically maneuvering through and about the multiple lanes of Interstate 95 between Dade County and Palm Beach County I noticed at a few points along interstate traffic would slow quite abruptly in a sea of red tail lights illuminating even the brightness of a sunny Florida day. Why, you ask. Here’s why.

Example: Positioned on the shoulder of the road was a parked marked police vehicle. As I drove past the parked vehicle I noticed there was no officer inside the vehicle. Just the police vehicle itself was enough to slow the speed and daring moves of drivers who needed to be slowed down. Of course, once past the parked police vehicle most resumed their race, pace and chase to their destination since they did not want to be late for something so important it required increased speed and risk, fueled by adrenaline, to reach their goal.

By making TIME your friend you can avoid the need to rush, hurry and take chances you normally might not take. When time is your friend you WIN in the game of life.

Example:

Say you get up late. You need to shower, shave and relieve yourself. You’re rushed which leads to perhaps a cut or two while shaving, not being patient enough to allow time for the water temperature to reach your desired level and you miss the bowl. Of course you never lift the seat or if you do lift the seat you do not return it to the down position. Sorry ladies.

While getting dressed a button falls off your shirt, you can’t find your belt, now where’s the other shoe and when you zip up, OUCH. Guys have all done this and it is a big OUCH.

You make it to the kitchen where there is only a sip remaining in the milk container so you search for an alternative beverage. No time to make coffee which could have been prepared the previous night. What about lunch. Last night, as well, was the time to make it. I’ll get something at work. Oops no cash. I think there’s some crackers in my desk. Gotta stop at the ATM. Wait, no time. I’m running late.

Out the door. Cloudy sky. Better get the umbrella if only I knew where it was. In the car. Where’s the keys. In the house. I can’t get in. No keys. They’re all on the same key chain, fob or lanyard. Garage door. What’s the code? Have to call my wife. Where’s my phone? Got it. Down to 2% charge. One call is all I need. Hello. She’s doesn’t hear my call. I’ll text. She texts back with the code. In the house. Got the keys and wallet, too, which I forgot to take in my haste to Get Up!!! Get Out!!! Get Going!!!.

Off to work. School bus, trucks, construction, rain (no umbrella which I did not get since I was distracted looking for the keys), red traffic lights. Oh no. I forget my briefcase with all the papers for my important meeting.

In the parking lot. Loads of rain. No close by parking spot only far away from the door. No umbrella. Soaking wet. At the office greeted by “Meeting cancelled” until tomorrow.

The greatest gift you can give someone is TIME. Give TIME to yourself.

Back to the POWER OF ONE:

Example:

In towns all over our country you will find the daily ritual and routine of getting to and going home from school.

In one town the daily schedule finds traffic proceeding smoothly during the morning dash and rush to work. Around 7:15 AM and 2:30 PM the CONTROL person arrives on the scene to maintain order and CONTROL of the multiple vehicular and pedestrian travelers.

The road is two lanes, one east bound and the other west bound. There is a turning lane in each direction and a cross walk for pedestrians. In addition to cars, trucks and buses there are parents pushing and some running behind their baby filled strollers, walkers and kids riding bikes. Even in today’s world you will find a kid or two riding a bike to school. Isn’t that great!!!

ONE person is in control: A Police Officer who manages everyone’s movement. No honking horns. No pointing fingers. No screaming out of windows. No erratic driving habits. No inappropriate behavior. Only CONTROL by the POWER OF ONE.

The Police Officer is in CONTROL. He directs the turning the lanes into and exiting the school. He motions for east and west bound traffic to stop and resume. He stops all vehicles when the crosswalk is in use. The Police Officer CONTROLS all this movement in a synchronized, choreographed, efficient and timely ballet of motion. The Power of One.

I have provided two examples but I am most certain you have your own but prior to now you may not have given it any consideration or thought. Perhaps Law Enforcement does theses type of CONTROL procedures not only to CONTROL traffic flow but to save us time, money, lost time at work and all the other inconveniences we can encounter by not allowing TIME to be our friend.

The Power of One. You are the ONE. You have the POWER

Mental Health and Well Being

“I am Nobody, Who Are YOU?

Are YOU Nobody Too?”

The Pandemic of Pain. YOUR Pain.

Mental Health Pain does not stand alone. It is part of the whole YOU and includes YOUR physical, emotional physiological, and spiritual self. 

It’s worldwide, global, universal and in your backyard. Everyone is subject to this PAIN. The wise, and lucky folks know this for themselves. They have had someone trustworthy tell THEM to seek help whether from a hair dresser, cab driver or friend. Additionally they will tell YOU to seek a certified and experienced professional for YOU. 

The first step is the most difficult. In order to get there, first you must leave. It is YOU who will make the determination that yes, I need help. That’s more than half the battle. You’ll be surprised how many are willing to provide, and more significantly, how many are walking in your shoes as you reach out. COLOR. 

MOTIVATION: My motivation comes from an experience in high school art class where I was told by the teacher that I was the first student in her 20 years of teaching Art that could not draw a straight line between two points using a ruler. She was a wise woman and set a course and path for me to succeed.  With permission from school officials and my parents, she gave me a small knife and the old fashioned bar of Ivory Soap. My assignment was to create. No instructions, no guidance nor plan to fulfill. Just carve and create; which is what I did. I carved, carved and carved some more. It was akin to “whittling” as the country folks might say. I created dozens of pieces, all unique and all of which were displayed on the classroom window sills. I earned a “B” grade for the class and had the cleanest hands in the school. While my classmates drew, sculpted and painted I carved.  

Fifty-five years later I am carving again only this time with a new meaning, purpose and definition. I am doing it as my way of letting you know that I feel your pain at this time in life. 

There is a darkness which becomes overwhelming but can be conquered by the LIGHT. Look at, around and eventually through each piece of cleansing soap and you will find that the smallest ray of LIGHT can grow and mature into a new YOU, filled with Hope, Faith and Love, turning all the negatives in YOUR world into success, achievement and victory. There’s a well known song asking you to Accentuate the Positive and Eliminate the Negative, allowing you to accomplish more than you ever thought possible. Free yourself of distractions, of pain and thank God that YOU are Free at Last. 

NEGATIVES:

BITING – PIERCING – PENETRATING – GRIPPING – INVASIVE – DEBILITATING – CONSUMING – TORMENTING – 

HORRIFIC – OMINOUS - FRIGHTENING

They are strong words that go beyond their definition based on our YOUR experiences and feelings. Proportionately the negatives far outweigh and outnumber the positive and healthy ways to manage and control our situations. YOU know this since YOU have applied for scores of jobs, receiving many negative or no responses. This is soon forgotten when the ONE YES response comes YOUR way, which it will, when YOUR attitude is positive, healthy and aware. 

YOU need to give yourself TIME to listen YOURSELF. Deep down YOU have the answers and solutions; YOU just need permission and confirmation that YOU are doing what is right and proper for yourself instead of what others are doing. When everyone is turning right, please turn to the left. The fact that you applied to a job shows that you have HOPE.  That YOU believe you can do the job shows that you have FAITH.

The time will soon be upon us when the number of folks struggling with issues brought on and exacerbated by the current global health crisis will far outnumber those who are not in this position, YET. 

Soon the world will be aware that everyone is fighting their personal battle with the invisible evil that lurks among us, not in the form of a global virus but in the unique self-condition that invades our personal world, often impeding and preventing OUR growth, progress and eventual success. The darkness will appear to be overwhelming but there is

strength to be found in character, determination, awareness and most important, in PREPARTION to offset, and manage the invasion of self-doubt.  Preparation takes TIME – that most precious of gifts. YOU have the power to succeed through and past struggles, overcoming obstacles and conquering concerns given HOPE, FAITH and LOVE. 

YOU are EMPOWERED by preparing YOURSELF to enjoy the journey to YOUR success.

There is LIGHT in the form of opportunity and accomplishment. It will take WORK - focused, centered and concentrated on YOU. And YOU will need COLOR from support, assistance, guidance, inspiration and direction since YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE!!! 

YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  Loneliness is everything it is cracked up to be to. 

PROOF: A One Person Show is never only one person.  It is singers, dancers, musicians, bus drivers, roadies, publicists, marketing, agents, promotions, lighting, staging, carpenters, food service, medical staff, coordinators, lawyers, accountants, administrators and scores of other professionals working in harmony, with their own personal and career issues, that makes the One Person Show happen. 

The LIGHT and COLOR are always there, visible and illuminated. Both must be seen and made known to YOU that it, the LIGHT and COLOR, are in fact attainable, available and AT THE READY to welcome YOU when the time is right. 

Admitting to YOURSELF that you need HELP opens the way and leads YOU to your goals. Having HOPE, FAITH, and 
TIME on your side provides the vehicle to power your energy. 

The greatest gift YOU can give YOURSELF is TIME. 

TIME to Understand YOU. 

TIME to THINK. 

TIME to PREPARE. 

TIME to PLAN. 

TIME to PERFORM. 

TIME to HEAL. 

TIME to GIVE to OTHERS. 

TIME to GIVE YOURSELF TIME. 

TIME LEADS to SUCCESS. 

TIME to PLANT SEEDS. 

TIME to TAKE ROOT and GROW. 

TIME to CULTIVATE YOUR OWN GARDEN 

TIME to ENJOY LIFE ON YOUR TERMS. 

TIME IS YOUR FRIEND. 

TIME to TRUST, RESPECT and LOVE YOU

This is NOT about me, this is about and for YOU!!! 

There is Color and Light. 

It is there. 

Find YOURS.