[00:00] Speaker 1: (Instrumental music plays) Good evening, and welcome to The Laughing Heart. This is Arrel Strider. I'm delighted that I can be with you for this podcast. My work over the years has been devoted to exploring life, love, and spirit. It began in the middle 60s when I had my midlife crisis. Yes, I was always precocious. I was stymied by the possibility that, well, I would come to an end. So I set off on a journey to see if there were alternatives, and that led me to an extraordinary variety of experiences that included teachings, immersed in various groups, exploring different religious perspectives. And at that time, I was involved in the theater, and I was inspired to use my experience in theater as an actor, dancer, and director to interpret the various discoveries I was making on the road to some level of enlightenment. I continue, of course, pursuing that with the hope and confidence that, at some point, I will achieve some awareness. Although I've achieved a little bit so far.

[01:50] Speaker 1: One of the things I have concluded as a result of this journey is that to arrive virtually, one is able to recognize the living spirit in others. In fact, the process of spiritual development is one of becoming more and more inclusive of that which appears other than you, and deepening into the stillness inside. But let's step back and set the stage. You know how those movies, they start and they engage you, and then they stop and they go, "Six months earlier." And we find out how it led up to the moment that you're in at that time. I wrote this piece, one of many, early on in my journey. I think it's self-explanatory. It's called The Puzzle. 40 billion people were trying to put together this very large jigsaw puzzle. Needless to say, it was pretty confusing having that many people traipsing about on a pile of puzzle pieces. They were always bumping into one another and getting into fights.

[03:10] Speaker 1: A couple of fellas got pretty teed off when they both stumbled on the same piece at the same time, and each had a different place for it. Neither chap would release the piece long enough for the other to try it. They stood there pulling on it until one of them died. But he had followers, as did the other man, who continued to grapple for the piece until it disintegrated. Some folks became rather attached to different pieces and would hoard them. When one old lady died, they found dozens of pieces in her attic, and one of them turned out to be a corner. A number of people had found a group of pieces that looked like the edge of the puzzle. Thousands of years were spent trucking out to the edges to test them, as transportation in those days was slow and tedious. Sometimes they would cart a blue piece out to the edge, only to discover that gray pieces were needed there. This was a most frustrating and confusing era in puzzle building.

[04:30] Speaker 1: Gradually, a suggestion of a perimeter did take place. It was rough, to be sure, but at least there seemed to be a little order to the whole mess. For a long time, no one was sure whether there was any order. It is to their credit that they put so much energy into such an obscure and unrewarding activity. Many bystanders gathered to speculate about the order. Theories were conceived in profusion. Some scientist types succeeded in assimilating 14 pieces and advanced their theory. Philosopher types speculated with abandon, and religionists with unmitigated self-confidence. But it was generally a pretty hit-and-miss process. After some significant discovery, there occurred hundreds of years with relatively little progress. Always, people moaned, "Will it come together? Will the pieces fit?" Many became disillusioned. "What if we get it all together and it turns out to be ugly?" But no one knew the answers to these questions.

[05:56] Speaker 1: Well, some suggested that there was an artist responsible for the picture puzzle, but their claims were, at best, very vague and generally founded on very-... unprovable theories. They were never taken too seriously, and it was thought by most that this was fortunate. The process continued chaotically. In one corner, some people had spent thousands of years trying to put together a number of green pieces, only to discover years later that there were two different green sections in the puzzle. Others became superstitious about the pieces. One group, for instance, refused to handle a certain piece because they had seen a comrade die while handling it. Of course, there were those individuals who decided definitely and defiantly that the puzzle didn't fit together at all into anything of any consequence. "Why try?" was their slogan, and they persuaded thousands to forsake the puzzle and devote their lives to their own individual ends.

[07:12] Speaker 1: The puzzle builders with their convictions became easy prey to the self-oriented non-puzzlers. The number of non-puzzlers was increasing at an alarming rate, at a point when they seemed almost to outweigh the puzzle builders. There occurred an extraordinary event which forever changed the whole course of puzzle building. A man appeared bearing a picture of the box top from which the puzzle came. Reactions were mixed. They ranged from excitement and enthusiasm to total skepticism and disbelief. The peculiar thing though was that many non-puzzlers became convinced of this guy's authenticity, but many were so adamantly opposed to him and his picture that they had him killed, but not before his picture had been disseminated in many places. The acceptance of his picture was a definite threat to the non-puzzlers who had been exploiting the poor puzzle builders.

[08:34] Speaker 1: His followers had extraordinary fervor though, and they spread the knowledge of him and his picture since in some strange way, he seemed to embody the picture which he presented. His most fantastic claim was that he had known the puzzle designer and indeed was related to him. Naturally, this claim put off a number of people who considered it, well, just outlandish. But many did accept him and his claims and indicated that their beliefs had been confirmed. It must be noted, however, that they were very vague when asked to give an explicit concrete justification of their beliefs. But as to the picture of the box top, it was purported by those who had seen it to be very striking and impressive. It radiated in some mysterious way, a kind of serene beauty and gave off the sensation of wholeness and calmness to all who beheld it. At the time of this writing, there exists something like another installment of the image that the man presented.

[10:03] Speaker 1: It is a considerably larger rendition of the whole, but in every way conforms to and enhances the original picture. There are those who believe that this latest picture, in combination with the one brought by the puzzle designer's relative, could finally give a focus and sorely needed unity to the current puzzle-building trends. We are waiting for further information. To comment on that piece, I'd like to invite one of my friends to join me. May I introduce Barney, and he, he's from the neighborhood. Welcome, Barney.

[10:42] Speaker 2: Well, hi, Errol. It is so good to be here. Boy, I like that story of the puzzle here. I can see all these people on the puzzle bumping into each other and confused and everything you said about it. Seems like that though we're still in the puzzle, doesn't it?

[10:58] Speaker 1: Well, yes, I (laughs) I guess it does.

[11:02] Speaker 2: Well, it reminds me, that character in, uh, what was the name of that show called The King and I? He was always saying, "'Tis a puzzlement."

[11:11] Speaker 1: Well, I could say that too, although when I work my way through the confusion, sometimes there is a piece that emerges, uh, a useful piece.

[11:22] Speaker 2: Well, I can understand that all right. I'm always looking for the pieces of the puzzle here because if you just leave it to me to figure out where we're going, I'm not doing so good. But the puzzle helps especially, like you said, when you got the box top. Boy, that really helps. Otherwise, you're really adrift, and do you know what being adrift is?

[11:46] Speaker 1: Uh, well, (laughs) I know you're gonna tell me.

[11:48] Speaker 2: Being adrift is like you don't know where you're going or what you're doing, uh, why you're here, and lots of people are adrift. I hope that you'll use this program to be able to help them get out of being adrift and get on some kinda track, or at least a track that's gonna make them feel better.

[12:07] Speaker 1: Barney, I think you've said it, and that is what this show is about, to give you some, hopefully some understanding, and more important that, uh...

[12:16] Speaker 2: ... some comfort and even hope. What can I say? Barney, thanks for being here with me. I appreciate what you have to say as I always do. And you're welcome, Harold. You call me in anytime you want. I'd like to follow that up with this comedy sketch Rochelle and I did in Marin County several years ago. It's called More, or Is This All There Is? And it features two characters we play, Lord and Lady Umbridge. More.

[12:56] Speaker 3: Is this it?

[12:58] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:02] Speaker 5: I think so.

[13:05] Speaker 3: Is this all there is?

[13:07] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:09] Speaker 3: Have we arrived?

[13:11] Speaker 5: Arrived?

[13:12] Speaker 3: Where we're going.

[13:14] Speaker 5: I don't know. Where are we going?

[13:17] Speaker 3: I don't know. That's why I asked the question, why-

[13:20] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:21] Speaker 5: What question?

[13:23] Speaker 3: Is this it?

[13:26] Speaker 5: It's as far as it's gotten, I suppose.

[13:29] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:30] Speaker 5: It's difficult to say.

[13:33] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:33] Speaker 5: I suppose it, uh, depends on your point of view.

[13:37] Speaker 3: Your point of view?

[13:37] Speaker 5: Well, yes. If you're up, it would look quite different than if you were down.

[13:42] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:42] Speaker 5: And if you were in the middle, it would look altogether different. So where are you?

[13:47] Speaker 3: Well, I can't tell unless I know if this is it.

[13:50] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[13:54] Speaker 3: If this is all there is, then obviously, ah, the most is yet to come and down, and if we're halfway and in the middle. So which is it?

[14:07] Speaker 5: I rather think we're in the middle.

[14:09] Speaker 3: What makes you say so?

[14:10] Speaker 5: Because I can see lots below and lots above.

[14:15] Speaker 3: Well, I can see lots below all right, but what makes you think there's any more above?

[14:20] Speaker 5: That's it.

[14:22] Speaker 3: What?

[14:22] Speaker 5: More. There must be more to come.

[14:26] Speaker 3: What makes you think so?

[14:28] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[14:28] Speaker 5: Well, it might happen that this is it.

[14:31] Speaker 3: And why shouldn't this be it?

[14:33] Speaker 5: Well, it could be dreadful, that's all, if this were all there was.

[14:35] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[14:40] Speaker 5: Besides, there's always been more before. Why shouldn't there be more afterwards?

[14:44] Speaker 3: Hmm, that's rather optimistic, I'd say. Besides, what makes you think more is a habit? Just because there's always been more before doesn't necessarily mean there'll be more after. Things could change, couldn't they?

[14:57] Speaker 5: No, not more. More could not change.

[15:00] Speaker 3: Why not? Why won't more change?

[15:03] Speaker 5: Because there always has been more.

[15:05] Speaker 3: But someone could shut the whole bloody thing down.

[15:11] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[15:11] Speaker 3: Press the button, pull the lever, off the cord.

[15:15] Speaker 5: Why would they want to do that?

[15:17] Speaker 3: I don't know. Why would ... think they do. Bunch of weirdos if you ask me.

[15:21] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[15:23] Speaker 3: That's why I don't think you can be sure there's going to be more, unless you mean more weirdos, of course. Yeah.

[15:32] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[15:32] Speaker 5: Look at it this way. In the beginning, there was a tiny bit. Right?

[15:39] Speaker 3: All right.

[15:40] Speaker 5: And then got to be a little. Right?

[15:42] Speaker 3: All right.

[15:44] Speaker 5: Then there was a small bunch, then a bunch, then a goodly amount.

[15:50] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[15:50] Speaker 5: Then a lot, then a great bunch. Right?

[15:54] Speaker 3: Pretty crowded, I'd say.

[15:56] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[15:57] Speaker 3: That's why I don't think you can say there's going to be more, if anything is taking up everything already. You know, there would, uh ... How would there ever be room for more? Besides, who'd want more? Do you?

[16:09] Speaker 5: Yes, I would want more.

[16:13] Speaker 3: Why?

[16:13] Speaker 5: Well, you know, I wouldn't want it to end here. And besides, if there are more things, might get better.

[16:18] Speaker 3: What makes you think more is better? Bigger hasn't been better. Why should more be better?

[16:25] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[16:26] Speaker 5: Because the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

[16:31] Speaker 3: Ooh. I beg your pardon?

[16:32] Speaker 5: I said-

[16:32] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[16:34] Speaker 5: ... the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

[16:37] Speaker 3: Well, it's very cute thinking.

[16:38] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[16:40] Speaker 5: But you do agree, don't you?

[16:42] Speaker 3: I suppose so. It's always been, uh, always been that way, I presume.

[16:47] Speaker 5: Well-

[16:47] Speaker 3: That doesn't mean it always would be that way.

[16:49] Speaker 5: You mean the whole, their parts might be greater than the whole.

[16:52] Speaker 3: Well, I don't doubt it, but, but what does that have to do with there being more?

[16:56] Speaker 5: Well, it just proves that if the whole is greater than the sum of their parts, if there are more parts, then the whole would be greater still.

[17:04] Speaker 3: So that's good?

[17:05] Speaker 5: It means, it proves that the whole is greater. More is greater. Excuse me. I don't even know what I'm talking about.

[17:14] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[17:15] Speaker 3: Greater, eh? But is it better?

[17:18] Speaker 5: Yes, because if the whole is greater, there's more chance for the parts to be better since they are part of the whole.

[17:25] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[17:33] Speaker 3: Yes.

[17:33] Speaker 5: Yes. So it proves that more is greater.

[17:37] Speaker 3: Why?

[17:40] Speaker 5: Why?

[17:40] Speaker 3: Why?

[17:40] Speaker 5: Well, because it's always been that way and because the part is never as big as the whole.

[17:47] Speaker 3: Wh- what?

[17:48] Speaker 5: That's right. If the sum of the parts is never bigger than the whole, they can always get more holy, can't they?

[17:58] Speaker 4: (laughing)

[18:00] Speaker 3: More holy?

[18:01] Speaker 5: Yes, more holy. It means that things can get better, can't they?

[18:05] Speaker 3: Better and bigger, you mean. But what makes you think they'll get better? I don't think they will get better at all. Besides, besides, what, what if they shut it all down?

[18:15] Speaker 5: They?

[18:15] Speaker 3: Yes. The parts, the parts.

[18:17] Speaker 5: But they can't do that, could they?

[18:19] Speaker 3: Why not?

[18:24] Speaker 6: ... and yes, there'd only be a few parts trying to shut the whole thing down.

[18:28] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[18:29] Speaker 6: And obviously, they couldn't shut the whole thing down-

[18:31] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[18:31] Speaker 6: ... because the whole is greater.

[18:33] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[18:35] Speaker 8: (laughs) That stillows your mind.

[18:42] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[18:44] Speaker 6: Yes. Yes.

[18:44] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[18:45] Speaker 6: So, these can't be all rivets.

[18:48] Speaker 8: No, are they not?

[18:50] Speaker 6: Of course not.

[18:51] Speaker 8: Oh, we're still on our way then?

[18:53] Speaker 6: Of course.

[18:53] Speaker 8: Well, well, are you, uh, heading my way?

[18:58] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[19:00] Speaker 6: I'd rather think so.

[19:02] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[19:03] Speaker 8: Could I catch a ride with you then since you seem to know where it gets worse?

[19:07] Speaker 7: (laughs)

[19:13] Speaker 6: I am my, my own person, you know, so I have to be be-going up a different road than you. But I'll beat you when we get there.

[19:21] Speaker 8: There?

[19:22] Speaker 6: When we arrive.

[19:24] Speaker 8: You think we will arrive there?

[19:26] Speaker 6: Of course I do. I expect so.

[19:29] Speaker 7: (coughs)

[19:29] Speaker 8: I hope so.

[19:31] Speaker 6: Well, I'll, uh, see you there.

[19:33] Speaker 8: Right. Uh, there. You really are going up then, you say?

[19:37] Speaker 6: Of course we are.

[19:39] Speaker 8: Oh, good. Jolly good. Well, thanks for the lift. In.

[19:45] Speaker 6: Quite welcome.

[19:48] Speaker 7: (claps)

[19:49] Speaker 2: Well, I hope you found that provocative and interesting. And guess what? We're so fortunate this evening because we have, surprise to me, a special guest, in fact, Lord Umbridge, all the way from jolly old England. (laughs) Welcome, Lord Umbridge. Wow, what a surprise treat. Oh, good evening, Errol. Yeah, I must say, it's also a delight for me. It's always a delight for me. Well, let's get right to it. Wha- y- you learned something it sounds like. Oh, yes. My spouse is always able to show me, well, the light when I wander around in the darkness, bumbling my way into some sort of sanity, which continues to elude me. Oh, come on. What do you mean elude you? You're, (laughs) you're a very smart guy. Y- you know, you've been educated. You're, you're, uh, wealthy. (laughs) That didn't come easy. Oh, yes, those are fine things and all of that, but they're no substitute for some inner awareness, which as I said, continues to elude me. Well, let me ask you this.

[21:06] Speaker 2: What, what do you do to try and g- get there? Oh, well, I'm... Several things. Of course, I, I try to drop into the stillness. Not easy for me because my mind is always jumping about here and there, things I have to do, go to the bathroom, take out the trash, drive this way, go get that, this, that, and the other. (laughs) I, I, I can so relate to that. When I try and meditate, (laughs) I can last focused on, I don't know how else to call it, but the presence for about three seconds. (laughs) And then I'm off and running. And then at a certain point, I find myself and I catch myself and I go, "Go get back." Oh, yes. I used to resist that part of it and judge it. "Oh, dear, dear. My man, you're, you're off and running around again." But I've come to forgive myself, and I try to just gently bring it back. And, well, like you, then I can stay there for, well, perhaps a second or two before I'm off and gone, running around again.

[22:17] Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a challenge to be in stillness, but well worth it. I trust and I invest this time because I trust that at some point it's going to be, uh, revelationary. (laughs) And that I will be able to access and deepen into, uh, the spirit, the source, the essence, um, that which transcends and infuses everything. Oh, I like that. Transcends and infuses everything. In other words, there's nothing outside of everything. (laughs) No, I don't think so. I don't think there's anything outside of everything. Uh- Oh, does that mean that we're actually a part of everything? Well, yeah. Doesn't that kinda follow logically? Oh, so then any thought that we might be separate from everything is preposterous. Oh, I hadn't thought of it like that, but yeah, it's kind of an illusion. Well, we are predisposed to that illusion by the very fact that we've entered into this corporeal being-hood, which appears to be separate from everyone else. It does look and feel that way, doesn't it?

[23:37] Speaker 2: You know, I, I've heard once that, that the body is an illusion. Well, I kinda rebelled against that. It's a, it's a pretty striking illusion for something that's got billions of, uh, chemical activities (laughs) going on all the time. That's a pretty fancy illusion, wouldn't you say? Oh, yes, I've given that quite some thought, and I realize it's not the body itself is an illusion, it's our perception of the body because the body mo- most, more than anything is a expression of our separation. And to the degree that we project that onto the body, well, that is an illusion. Speaking of illusion, I think one of the biggest challenge of life is how to, uh, navigate out of the illusion, uh, into the reality-Oh, yes. Absolutely. You have to let go of anything you think you know about it, uh, and realize that, uh, out of all infinity, uh, to say we've scratched the surface is quite a lot and probably totally inaccurate.

[24:50] Speaker 2: I suggest that we scratch the surface of the surface that we are actually scratching, and there's more surface to be scratching, and there's quite an itch underneath all of it. (laughs) Yes. (laughs) I guess there is quite an itch underneath all of it. That's good. Well, Lord Umbridge, this has been such a wonderful time together, and I'm so grateful. And, uh, you wanna thank Lady Umbridge because it sounds like she's been a real instrument for your growing awareness. Well, I've learned, Errol, that you really can't have a successful society unless people are able to drop into that essential nature of all things, where all goodness and truth and virtue arrives. I understand and can appreciate that not that many people may be predisposed to move in that direction, but I have hope that that will change. And perhaps circumstances, difficult as they may be... As a matter of fact, it may just be the very difficulty that will send people inward to see what's, well, what's going on.

[26:04] Speaker 2: If there is, in fact, anything going on. So, there you have it. Toodle-oo, chop-chop, bully-bully, and all of that. Well, thank you again, Lord Umbridge, and it's just a delight to have you here. Well, there you have it, our first podcast. We've covered a lot. (laughs) We worked on the puzzle, and we heard from Lord and Lady Umbridge dealing with the question of, was this all there is? Do we go further? When will he arrive? Et cetera. And then we took a look at the stages of evolution. Boy, this is a comprehensive program. Well, I'm so glad you could join me. Uh, before he leaves, Barney? Barney, do you have a minute to say anything else? Well, yeah, Errol. I sure do. I was so, uh, happy to be part of your first program. Boy, that's an honor. I hope people will, will get involved in putting the puzzle together. You know, there are too many non-puzzlers and they, they can overtake us, and they can do some nasty things, as you can see now from what's going on in the world.

[27:14] Speaker 2: So, I just wanna say goodbye to you, Errol, and goodbye to you all out there. And I hope to run into you in the neighborhood soon. Well, thanks, Barney. This has been great. So, with that, I'd like to invite you to check out our website, TheLaughingHeart.org. And we also have a YouTube channel, Strider Inner, as in I-N-N-E-R, Tainment, where we feature a lot of our videos, including the video of Lord and Lady Umbridge doing the piece, More, filmed in Marin County, California. Well, that being said, I'd like to close with this poem, which, in some ways, kind of sums up not only what we've covered tonight, but what we hope to come to more realization as we move forward with these ongoing podcasts, which are every Sunday, uh, 7:00 PM Central Time. Tell your friends, and I hope you can join us. And as I said to end, here's the love poem. I cannot live out of love, for only in love do I know myself.

[28:29] Speaker 2: When I join with another, my soul drives forward like the hard earnest thrust of love's embrace. When I enter love, I come to know myself. For in the eyes of my beloved, whether man, woman, child, or God, I see my soul enhanced. And as my soul beams back to me, it brings with it another, and myself is that much bigger for allowing two inside it. (music)