Letters On Life - If Not Now Then When
We continue to live for the future, rather than for today, waiting for the circumstances of our lives to be in perfect alignment. "Ah, then I can be happy again," we think to ourselves.
IF NOT NOW THEN WHEN
It wasn't the first time. Ever since I can remember, people have had difficulty pronouncing my last name correctly. Sometimes I let it go, but most of the time I correct them.
During a radio interview, when Dancing on the River was first published, the interviewer did a number on my name. After a few attempts at correcting her, I let go, went with it, and discovered an unexpected gift. "Sus-NOW as in NOW is the time to enjoy life and to live life fully," was my response. She totally embraced it and that's what we talked about for the rest of our time together.
As we know, this quest is a lot easier said than done, but certainly one worthy of our best efforts. I keep working at it, so I know the pitfalls and challenges. I also know what seems to bring me closer to this way of being.
Many of us let the circumstances of our life affect how we feel in the moment, which I refer to as the only if syndrome. If only the circumstances of my life were different I could be happy. I'm sure you have experienced this syndrome also. I know I have and still do occasionally.
As a result we postpone our happiness until another day. Usually when there is a resolution of our situation we feel better, but only for a short while until the next cycle begins. We again fall into the only if trap which affects almost every aspect of our lives.
We especially see it in the workplace and in our relationships. When we are dissatisfied with our careers, at some level we adopt the mindset that we can't be happy until our circumstances change. Or if our primary relationships are out of kilter, we adopt the mindset that we can't be happy until we have more clarity or resolution of the current situation.
We continue to live for the future, rather than for today, waiting for the circumstances of our lives to be in perfect alignment. "Ah, then I can be happy again," we think to ourselves.
Throughout the years, I have come to see perfection in a new light. Not as an absolute standard, but as an evolving dynamic state of being with its share of peaks and valleys. It's learning to be and live in the moment with all of it, rhe twists and turns, the ups and downs, and the juiciness of being human.
What helps with cultivating this awareness is a daily practice which, for me, begins with meditation. Then I introduce gratitude into the space.
Gratitude shifts your focus from what you don't have and what you don't like about your life, to what you do have and what is right about your life.
As we know from being on this adventure together what we focus on expands. When we focus on our lack that's what we create more of, and when we focus on the good, we create more of that.
There is one more simple practice that you can add to the mix that will have a profound effect on your day and it only takes a few seconds. Hopefully it becomes embedded into your daily routine.
In the morning after you have taken time for quiet reflection and your gratitude practice, ask yourself the following empowering question: I wonder what the highlight of my day might be? Which creates an expectation of good. As your day progresses, you're curious as to what that highlight might be, which can occur anytime or anywhere, even at that meeting you might dread.
Hopefully, by the end of the day, you won't be able to make up your mind as to what the highlight was because you'll have two or three great choices. Perhaps that's when you discover the gift that has been waiting for you to claim.
This shift usually won't occur overnight but when looking back over time it will seem dramatic.
Perhaps you're thinking that now isn't the right time to integrate all of these new practices into your life. There is never going to be a better time, even with those loose ends still up in the air. By taking care of today, tomorrow will have a way of taking care of itself.
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"What a worthy adventure we are on. Our job is to enjoy it, to be ethical and to live life fully."
Until next time,
Journey On
Mark
ABOUT THE SOUL OF UNCERTAINTY:
A young man just setting out in life encounters a mysterious "modern day mystic," Mervin, who promises to help him tap into magical powers inside himself to attain a sense of inner freedom,of joy, and his soul's purpose. In the manner of The Alchemist, The Soul of Uncertainty is a powerful fable that shows the human experience of life in all its ups and downs, forgetting and remembering, on a journey of spiritual adventure.
Mark Susnow, knows change. At the turn of the new millennium, he transitioned from a successful career as a trial attorney to what he does now as an Executive Life Advisor inspiring others to believe in themselves.
He is a cutting-edge thought leader. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection reach into his audiences and activates their capacities to live a more engaging and fulfilling life.
Mark supports his clients from his first hand experience of integrating what it takes to be successful in the marketplace, with the inner wisdom and emotional intelligence unfolded to him from years of meditation and yoga.
© Copyright 2005 Mark Susnow. All Rights Reserved.
