Speaker Identification

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment. This identification is based on the repeated lyrical/music structure that opens the episode, appears during breaks, and closes the show.

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host. The host introduces herself on the program as Gabrielle Cardona and describes herself as a relationship coach. The automated transcript sometimes rendered the name as Gabriel Cardona, Gabrielle Cardano, or similar variants, but the consistent intended name appears to be Gabrielle Cardona.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
We are more than what we see. Every voice, every story holds the key. Together we rise in this energy.

Different faces, different pain, different stories, same refrain. Trying to find a place to stand, trying to feel a guiding hand. What you say and what you mean, life somewhere in between. Every action has a cause, every heart behind the walls.

We can hear it if we look. We can see it. There’s a pattern in the soul. Every piece can make us whole.

Power. The power of synergy. Understanding you and me. Every difference, every truth. We can see it if we look. We can see it if we look. We can see it if we look.

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host:
Welcome to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona. I’m a relationship coach, but I started out in the industry pretty much when I was about six years old, when my mother started sending me to psychiatrists. She could not really figure me out, and she would hand me over to these mental health professionals and say, “Fix her. Send her back to me when you’re done.”

They would send me back after several weeks and say, “No, she’s kind of not fixable. We don’t know what to do with her.”

I do not agree with the mental health industry, because I think that, in the United States, combined with the pharmaceutical industry, people do not really know what is going on in their minds or their hearts that are the source of their bodies. So, as a relationship coach, I kind of teach people the opposite of everything that the mental health industry tells them.

Now, having said that, I have three children. They are now 26, 28, and 31 years old. My oldest, let’s just say I have never had a favorite, but I think in the moment that he said this to me, he kind of became my favorite. He would tell his friends, “My mom’s a shrink. My mom’s a shrink.”

I said, “Baby, you’ve got to stop telling people that. I hate shrinks. I hate everything about the shrink industry.”

He turned around and said, “Mom, you’re the worst kind of shrink. You’re a shrink in denial.”

I just went, “Okay, that was kind of a smart response.” I liked the fact that my kids are smart. I love the fact that I treated my children very differently. They were all very different people, and we could talk like that with each other. I could not talk to my parents the way I wanted to.

Do you know what? I did pretty much the opposite of everything the mental health industry told me. Books, magazines, television shows with experts; I did not do anything they said. I did what was organic for me. When I was teaching people, I would ask, “What is organic for you? What is truly your nature?” They would honestly say, “I have no idea.”

I would teach them about their personalities. I raised my kids three totally different ways because I knew that the exact same behavior displayed by three different people meant three completely different things.

Most of the time, people are not mentally ill. They are just confused, or they are very tired, and they do not need drugs. The pharmaceutical industry in this country is also very toxic. They are literally covering up symptoms without getting to the source of the cause, just the effect. Then you listen to the description of the drug, and you have 25 different side effects that are potentially worse than the original condition.

When I teach people about success in life as a coach, I do not just tell them all of their problems and have them talk about why they are unhappy. I give them equipment and strategy, and I stand on the sidelines, where I give them support and encouragement. They go out and score in the game of life.

When I started out as a life coach, people said, “Life coach is kind of general. You’ve got to find a niche. You have a specialty. What’s your specialty? Specifically, what do you teach people about life?”

This was about 15 years into my practice. I said, “A lot of people just do not know how to be with people. They really and truly have no social skills the way they used to, because I think technology has undermined their ability to form a meaningful connection with people.”

I just spent almost two hours with a colleague texting because people do not want to talk. They would rather text. They would rather get on their computer or social media than on their phone, or go to a physical place where they are in the same space, looking at each other and touching people. They do not want to get germs anymore. They are scared to death of germs.

You have to get near people. You have to be physically around them. And yes, when you have germs from other people, you have a stronger immune system. I am 50 years old. People think I am about 35 just because I look and feel energetic in a positive way.

So when I told people, “I am going to be a relationship coach. I want to teach people how to get back together with people and be in a good mood.”

How many of my listeners out there are more than 40 years old? I think there was a movie in the 80s, Say Anything. One of my favorite lines was when Lloyd Dobler said to his big sister, “How hard is it just to decide to be in a good mood and then be in a good mood?” His sister said, “Gee, it’s easy.” Of course, that was a stupid question if she was in a perpetually bad mood.

How important is it to really be in a good mood? Do you know how to get into a good mood? Different people need different things. What I did for my oldest was nothing like what I did for his brother, and my daughter was the polar opposite of both of them combined. When I got to know each of them personally as people, I knew that different people need different things.

Today, I am going to be talking about the differences that people have. Last week I was talking about “synchronize to synergize,” but really, specifically, what is going to make you personally happy, to get good-quality emotional energy. Then you can synchronize with people to synergize and create positive power.

You have power. If you have questions you want to ask me as a coach, I am not going to give you the same advice that a psychiatrist or a psychologist would. As a relationship coach, I do not think people are mentally ill. I think they are just misinformed.

You can go ahead and give the radio station a call. 888-627-6008 is the number, and my producer will let me know if anybody is out there asking questions. If anybody wants to talk and it is not about what I am specifically talking about at the time you call, it is okay. You can change the subject.

I am kind of expensive. If you go to my website, you will see my hourly rate is kind of steep. But the nice thing is you do not need me for years at a time. You only need me for a couple of weeks. This is the time on my show if you want to ask for advice without having to pay anything. Carpe diem, ladies and gentlemen. This is the time to do it.

What I am going to be explaining is the dynamics and principles of synergy, but in the context of personality, strengths, gifts, talents, and abilities. We have differences. I make it kind of an illustration of the human body. We have a lot of different personality potential out there, 16 different profiles. I use the Myers-Briggs profile system, but with functional order. Everybody does everything. They just do it in a slightly different way.

Let’s think about it in terms of body parts. What is more important, your hands or your eyes? You cannot compare them. What is more important, your brain or your heart? They are vital. They are both equally vital. They literally need each other. What is more meaningful in the act of life, your muscles or your bones? Come on.

Think about yourself and the people around you as vitally important elements to life, the world, society, and your health and well-being as a soul. You, as a soul, have your heart, mind, body, and spirit. You have to synchronize to synergize with other people.

Before I take a first break, I am going to explain synergy in principle. We do not add to each other. We do not even multiply. We empower each other. Let’s pull some numbers and power, like exponents. Four plus nine is not just 13. Four times nine is not just 36. Nine to the fourth power is 6,561. Four to the ninth power is 262,144.

Do you believe you have the power to make people exponentially better or worse?

I am going to take a real quick break. Again, the number to the station is 888-627-6008. If you have any questions, I am going to be talking about some pretty heavy principles today, some pretty deep concepts. Go ahead and call the station. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS Radio. I’m Gabrielle Cardona. We’ll be right back.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
[Music break.]

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host:
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach. The number to the station is 888-627-6008.

If you want to ask me a question about relationships in general, even regarding something I am not talking about at the time that you call, that is fine. Go ahead and give me a call, because I have been doing this for over 20 years. I have a lot of information about a lot of topics, but today I am going to be focusing on getting together with other people in a positive-energy way.

I put a post on LinkedIn because a lot of my followers and students are on LinkedIn. I put it as a general question: What is worse, disconnection or hatred? Indifference or hatred?

Wait a minute. If we are indifferent, can we say, “I don’t care”? Yes, well, that is a get-out-of-jail-free card.

No, absolutely not, because I tell people three principles. Number one, there is no neutral energy. You are either positive or you are negative, and indifference is negativity because it is not positive. You do not get a get-out-of-jail-free card.

The second principle: there is no inertia. You are either moving toward someone, away from them, or with them. It is a lot of work to stay with someone. You have to synchronize to synergize.

Number three: power comes with responsibility. Who do you genuinely believe you are not only responsible to, but accountable to, for the way that you wield your personal power? You have social influence over people whether you want it or not.

The bottom line is that a lot of people, just in general, do not want to be accountable for what they say and what they do. That is why social media is so popular now. People can say and do things on websites that they would not be able to get away with face to face in a physical space.

I ask my clients and my colleagues a lot, “What you just said, in this particular setting, in this particular time, would you have said that thing to that same person if they were standing in front of you and neither one of you could go anywhere?” Probably not.

When we get together, we have that personal power. We have that influence over people. Again, let’s think about it exponentially. You are not just adding to people. You are not just multiplying their power. You are exponentially increasing the influence they have not only on their physical world and environment, but also on the people in that environment.

People can pick up on your energy. Like I said in the first segment, getting in a good mood is tough, but is it worth it? If there is no neutral energy, saying to someone, “I don’t care,” means you have actually disconnected from yourself because you have had to turn off a part of your soul. That is either your heart or your mind, in order to be able to say, “I know this is a bad situation, and I am actually okay with it.”

There is no neutral. It is either good or bad. The question is, are you okay knowing that something is bad?

I pose it in the question of four I’s: ignorance, indifference, impotence, or incompetence. If we are talking about what is worse, ignorance or indifference, impotence or incompetence, these are all things that prevent us from succeeding in life because they inhibit the connection that we need to have with other people when we empower.

Let me go back to the numbers again. I said four and nine in the first part. You do not add to each other, because that would be 13. You do not multiply each other, because that would be 36. Nine to the fourth power is 6,561. Four to the ninth power is 262,144.

Do you believe that your gifts, talents, strengths, and abilities have the potential to do exponentially more things when you unite with people, when you synchronize and synergize with them, and when you understand the influence that other people have on you emotionally and mentally while you are performing those tasks?

Let me ask you: do you know what your abilities are? Do you know what your gifts and talents and strengths naturally are? Most people do not. When I give them their coaching sessions, the first thing I do is tell them their functional order.

Everybody does everything. If you are going to be a successful adult in this world, you have to learn how to do everything. But there are different levels of performance. If you are naturally really, really good at something, that means you are probably really bad at the opposite of it. You have to work really hard to do the other activity that is the opposite of what you are good at. Even when you get good at it, you are probably not going to like it.

Guess what? There are other people in the world who are really, really good at what you are really bad at.

Now let’s think about it this way: the glass is half full. Is there anyone in your life that you think serves no good purpose? Maybe they do. Maybe you just have not figured out what their strength is. Maybe they are not doing something they are naturally really good at. Maybe their life has not afforded them the opportunity to reach their full potential because they were never given the freedom to be who they organically are, to do their dominant function.

That means there is a potential opportunity for you to approach someone with positive energy. Let’s start with that. If you have a good attitude, the positive attitude of, “I do not know anything about you necessarily yet, or what this could be once we come together, but if we figure out what you are good at and what I am good at, then we synchronize and synergize. Together we can cooperate in making the world a better place because we have unity of focus and perspective.”

We really want to make sure we are doing the same thing at the same time for the same reason. Then everybody around us, while we are doing and being these things successfully in a positive and proactive way, will reap the benefits.

Guess what, ladies and gentlemen? There is more joy in giving than in receiving. Do you believe that as well?

I am going to go quickly down the list of why indifference is actually more toxic than hatred. I will go over them in detail throughout the show.

The first reason that being disconnected from yourself is worse than even being hateful and miserable is because you are in denial. Then you start lying to yourself. That is the very first step of really inhibiting who you are and lying to other people, because you are lying to yourself.

The second reason is because you are oblivious to what is going on around you. There will be opportunities that you miss out on.

Number three, your mindfulness is compromised. Your awareness of what is going on inside of yourself disappears.

Number four, your communication is compromised. You do not have the ability to effectively communicate with people.

Number five, you stop functioning in an organic way based on your personality’s functional order.

Number six, your replacements, what you are replacing your organic, true, authentic self with, are synthetic, and people cannot handle that quality reduction. They really are affected by it.

Number seven, people will not be able to trust you. That is huge. If people do not trust you, they will not work with you.

Number eight, your self-care disappears because you do not even know when you need things and what specifically you need. When you start to neglect yourself, you become very low quality.

Number nine, your spirituality is not possible because your heart, mind, and body disconnect from your spirit.

Number ten, you cannot be fulfilled. Even when you succeed, you do not feel gratification from that success. Even when you are in a good situation, you are never going to be happy or in a good mood.

Again, the number to the station is 888-627-6008. I am going to go ahead and take another break. When we come back, I am going to explain functionality in a more specific way. Think about yourself. You might learn something about yourself by the time this next segment is over. Good news: everybody has amazing abilities. They just do not know what they are.

We will take a break. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
In silence, there’s a reason. In the chaos, there’s a meaning. Every soul is speaking loud if we only slow it down. No more guessing who we are. We’ve been brilliant from the start. When we see with open eyes, we do not divide; we unify.

It’s the power, the power of synergy. Breaking walls and setting free. Every voice and every mind, finally seen, finally aligned. It’s the power, the truth we could not see. Now it is right in front of me. Not just people, destiny. That’s the power.

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host:
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona, and the number is 888-627-6008.

If you want to ask me a question about a relationship in your life, one where you are genuinely trying to synchronize with someone, it could be personal, professional, social, or casual. If it is just not quite happening, you might need to modify one or two things about that. But it does not necessarily mean either one of you is a bad person. Go ahead and give me a call.

I have been doing this for a long time, professionally over 20 years, but in my life, I have been doing it since I was about six, when I knew that everything the mental health industry was telling me was a complete and total crock. People are not sick. They are not labeled mentally ill for a good reason. If you really and truly do have something that you are working on improving, do drugs help you? No, they do not. What helps is communication.

Today, I am talking about how, when we get together, we do not have to disconnect. We do not become indifferent, and we do not have to detach ourselves from the people in our lives the way technology is really starting to make everybody want to do, because it is easier that way. That is why we have our animals as our children, because we do not want real children. They are work. But children are really cool people, and you can treat them with respect, time, and attention. Yes, that is a lot of work, and technology is much easier.

Let’s get back to people and relationships in a personal way: direct interaction, honest communication without being a jerk. You can be 100% honest without being hateful.

Let’s talk about the differences in personalities. I am not going to go through all the dichotomies because that could take about an hour. The functionality that I explain to people is universal. Everybody does all of the letters, even the ones that are not their personality, simply because life demands that you do those things. You just should only do certain ones in a certain way and for a certain amount of time.

Let me ask you: what do you believe is worse, to do what you are not or to not do what you are? They happen at the same time, so it is difficult to know the difference and to differentiate the negative effects that each one is having, because they are two different activities.

Sensing, intuiting, thinking, and feeling are activities that everybody has to go through in life, but they are on a scale from one to four, most to least, best to worst. Everybody has an order in which they perform those activities.

Now let me ask you this: is it better to do the things that are not really your nature because you are going to get something out of it, or just to suffocate who you are because it will prevent problems? Both of them are destructive in different ways for different reasons.

Let me pull two random profile letters: ESTP and INFJ, because they are polar opposites. For an ESTP, to determine which order the sensing, intuiting, thinking, and feeling activities fall into, the last letter of your personality, in this case the P, determines which of the two middle letters of your personality will be extroverted. P means that the sensing of the ESTP will be extroverted.

If the sensing is extroverted, the T, thinking, is going to be introverted. As an extrovert, the extroverted sensing is going to be their preferred activity. They are still going to do thinking activities. They are just going to do them in an introverted way, and they are not going to want to do them as often as their sensing activities.

When it comes to the two letters that are not their personality, the intuition and the feeling, how are they going to do those activities? The beautiful thing about nature is that it is all about balance. The polar opposite of extroverted sensing is introverted intuition. So if the extroverted sensing is their favorite, they are going to hate doing introverted intuition activities. If introverted thinking is number two on the list, the polar opposite of introverted thinking is extroverted feeling. That will be number three.

So number one is extroverted sensing. Number two is introverted thinking. Number three is extroverted feeling. Number four is introverted intuition.

That means there will be things in the day that demand that an ESTP be feeling and intuitive, but they should not do it for more than probably a total of four hours a day. If they are awake for 16 hours a day, they need to spend 10 to 12 hours a day being sensory and thinking. If they are doing intuitive and feeling activities, they are turning off their sensing and thinking. That is not good for the world.

If we are thinking about this in terms of what is worse, doing what you are not or not doing what you are, two things are going on. First, you are inhibiting who you are when you are not doing what you are. Second, you are taking away someone else’s opportunity to do what is organic for them. You are actually depriving someone else of the opportunity to be organic.

For example, if an ESTP were doing intuitive and feeling activities, that would actually hurt an INFJ, because they want to be intuitive and feeling. An ESTP could actually be forcing an INFJ to do the activities that are not their nature.

Think about hurting other people. Think about hurting yourself, and get back to what is good for you.

An INFJ, the J as the last letter, is going to make the third letter, F, extroverted. If the J turns the F extroverted, then the N would be introverted. As an introvert, they will want to do their introverted intuition activities. Their extroverted feeling would be number two on the list. The polar opposite of extroverted feeling is introverted thinking, and the polar opposite of introverted intuition is extroverted sensing. That is number four on their list.

If they are doing their introverted intuitive things and their extroverted feeling activities for at least 12 hours a day, then they do not have to be sensory or a thinker. They can be with the people in their life who are not like them and actually say, “I love that you are so good at what I am bad at. I hate doing these things. Thank you for being in my life.”

What kind of a gift is that? That is the most beautiful thing. You can say to someone, “You make my life better. Not only who you are, but what you do is priceless in my life.”

The world is now a better place because not only do we appreciate and respect our differences, but we trust each other’s motives. We can synchronize, and as long as we have that honest communication, we are not disconnected from ourselves. We do not have to detach from each other.

This will definitely be a good thing not only for us short term, but for the world long term. When we have good, positive energy, the people around us absorb our energy. Again, since there is no neutral, it is either positive or negative. People will be attracted to that, even if it is just in the form of making a joke with each other in a grocery store while we are talking about what we are grabbing from the shelf or from the produce department. Someone else can feel us genuinely connected to each other. That is going to put them in a good mood.

Do you believe you have that power? Think about what you have the potential to be in a healthy, strong, and positive way. It is time for you to really be the best you can be.

When I come back, I am going to get into a little more specific detail about this, because you are probably going to have to listen to the archive to hear the formula again, which is okay because BBS has archives.

We are going to take another real quick break. If you want to call in, the number is 888-627-6008. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
It’s the power of synergy. Every story, every sound. Every loss can still be found. And we choose what we see. We become synergy.

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host:
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona, and the number to this station, if you want to call in and ask a question, is 888-627-6008.

What I was talking about was getting that positive energy when you are around people and you know the people in your life. You truly understand their gifts, talents, strengths, and abilities, and you say to them, “I appreciate you. I respect you. I trust you. You make my life better.”

I can combine with people who are completely different from me because there are different things in life that need to get done. Nature has distributed talents, strengths, and abilities very nicely. All we have to do is figure out who is good at what and let them do those things.

Yes, we still have to do things that are not our personality, but not for more than four or five hours a day, because it is important for you to embrace your nature and maximize those talents, strengths, and abilities. That way, other people who have different abilities and talents can also take advantage of the opportunities that life extends to them.

Different situations need sensing. They need intuiting. They need thinking. They need feeling.

Sensing is about being tangible and directly interactive with your environment. I say this a lot, and I brag about it all the time: my husband is a very amazing extroverted sensor. The fact that he can drive and talk about anything with me, and make sure that what is going on with Uber Eats on his phone is giving him bad information, and he can kind of see that out of the corner of his eye, while at the same time seeing someone who somehow appears in front of his car, as if he saw them from the back of his head, that is amazing.

When he is cooking, he can cut and fry and thaw things, use spices, and I am like, “How do you do that?” I literally open the refrigerator holding something in my hand and say, “We do not have this ingredient in the refrigerator.” My husband will say, “Honey, it is in your hand.” I cannot sense to save my life.

Intuition: my best friend was an INFJ. Intuition was his dominant function. He could feel you through a wall. He knew and understood the principles of how things were connected to each other. He could take something as a principle and a concept and apply it in life in a profound way, and change people’s lives doing something that had absolutely nothing to do with the activity they were doing. He could feel what they were feeling even when they had absolutely no physical signs.

I would say, “How did you know that? How did you feel that the person was feeling that?”

He said, “Because I listened to what was going on inside of me when I was around them. It did not have to be anything visual, audio, olfactory, oral, or tactile. All of the things that life was giving me in the way of information, my brain was putting together and my heart was assimilating into something more profound than right here, right now.”

That is intuition. Sensing is about right here, right now. Intuition is the ability to understand what they needed and why they needed it.

Thinking is about making objective and rational decisions, being logical, and knowing that if something is stupid, you really should not do it. Thinkers are amazing at being logical and rational about things without getting too upset and personally offended when things are not really going the way they wanted. They know they are doing the right thing, so they do not always have to have what feels good for them, because they can make that sacrifice. Their objectivity is a universal and consistent strength that society depends on.

Feelers are generous, sensitive, and nurturing. They really and truly sacrifice for other people’s happiness, and they do not mind, because they know that sometimes things are not going to make rational sense. People have personal needs that are not logistical or analytical. You cannot really explain them in a rational way. But making people happy is what really matters, so they do not mind making those personal sacrifices.

They have amazing energy and endurance. My daughter is an extroverted feeler. I swear she can give and give and give and never get tired. Feeling is my inferior function. I can do it for a while, but I am going to get exhausted, and I will probably need some refined sugar when I am done.

Thinking, I am really good at. It is my dominant function. One of the best things about thinkers is that, like me as an INTP, I can have a conversation in my mind about what someone might say, why they would think this, what would happen if this was said, and what would happen if we did this. I can actually have an entire conversation with someone in my own mind, in the form of a debate, and lose, and I am okay with it because it is just information and it did not really happen yet. It is a matter of making sure the precision of the execution of everything I do is foolproof.

My oldest son is an ESFJ. That is tough for him. He will do it. He can do it, but he is definitely going to need to watch something sporting by the time he is done, and that is okay too.

If you know there are certain things that you are going to be really good at, that means you are going to be horrible at other things, and that is okay because someone else is going to be really good at what you are horrible at. If you know, appreciate, respect, and trust those things, you do not ever have to be defensive and judgmental, and you do not have to hurt other people, because you will not be disconnected from yourself.

When you start doing things that are your lower functions, you have to turn off part of who you are. I explain the four functions as dominant, auxiliary, tertiary, and inferior. Your best one is like breathing. The second one is like eating. The third one is like walking. The fourth one is like running.

Walking and running are not bad things to do. You just should not do them for too long. Keep in mind, when you are doing your tertiary and inferior functions, you are not breathing and eating in an emotional and mental way. You are suffocating yourself and starving yourself while you are walking and running.

Please be sure to do the things that nurture you, empower you, strengthen you, and invigorate you, because then the quality of what you do when you have to walk or run with or for someone else will be a high-quality performance.

How many times would you say, “Oh, yes, I am really good at both. I am really good at doing both of those letters of the dichotomy”? The question is: what is automatic for you? What brings you pleasure? What are you naturally really good at?

Finding out what you are naturally really good at, without ever having to take any classes to get good at it, what genuinely brings you pleasure, what you do not even need compensation to justify doing, and what is so easy it is automatic, is important. You do not have to put any conscious thought into it. If you do not know what that is, take the time to learn.

I just published a book called Embrace Your True Nature. It is on my website, life-synergy-coaching.com. I also have the e-book because not everybody wants to read a book. Some people just want to put it in their phone. I also have the audiobook because not everybody wants to even take the time to pull out their phone. They want to multitask while I read it to them. If you want the audiobook, that is also available on my website.

It is going to be something you may have to read a couple of times over, because first of all, there are the new concepts of functional levels, but also understanding what sensing, intuition, thinking, and feeling each are in daily life activities. Once you know those things, you can maximize your talents and abilities. Your positive energy will be contagious, and other people will become higher quality when they are around you.

I am going to take one last break. The number again to this station is 888-627-6008. When I come back, I am going to summarize what it means to synergize and the power that you have of synergy. This is BBS Radio. I’m Gabrielle Cardona.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
Every voice, every story holds the key. Together we rise in synergy. Different faces, different pain, different stories, same refrain. Trying to find a place to stand, trying to feel a guiding hand. What you say and what you mean, life somewhere in between. Every action has a cause, every heart behind the walls.

There is a pattern in the soul. Every piece can make us whole. The power of synergy. Understanding you and me. Every difference, every truth leads us back to something new.

Speaker 2 - Gabrielle Cardona, Host:
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I’m Gabrielle Cardona. Again, the number to this station is 888-627-6008.

I know a lot of my listeners listen to the archives. If you have a question you would like to pose, you can also send me an email at synergyrelationshipcoaching@gmail.com. That is the email I have for this business.

What I have been explaining is getting yourself into a very high-quality, organic state so that you do not have to detach or disconnect. You are not indifferent. You are not careless when it comes to what you think and how you feel about other people. It is very important for you to know that people are important, to accept them into your life, and to embrace who they are without being judgmental.

I spent a three-day weekend at a religious convention. I am not going to talk about religious doctrines with my clients, and I do not talk about it on my radio show, but there are spiritual principles that a lot of religions agree on. There is more joy in giving than in receiving. That is really important. “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you” is pretty basic.

One of the principles that I really liked about the Sermon on the Mount was that Jesus said, “You heard that it was said,” but then he would take it one step further. He said you are supposed to forgive other people, but you cannot even call up those things into your heart. You cannot even feel bad. When you say, “I forgive you,” you have to get to the source. That means really and truly what is going on inside of you, not just what you do.

That means you have to be very aware of what you are thinking and what you are feeling. When I tell people personal care and self-care are the key without narcissism, that is another thing I really did not like about what I heard from the experts growing up. They said, “It is more important to take care of yourself. Take care of yourself first. Do not neglect yourself for the sake of other people.”

Here is the principle, ladies and gentlemen: if you are going to take care of yourself, it has to be with the unselfish motive of getting yourself into a higher-quality state with the intention of giving back.

Ask yourself: if you are going to say to other people, “No, I am going to neglect you. I am going to reject you. I am going to stop being a good person to you for myself,” is it with the intention of ultimately coming back to them to increase your value?

Let’s go back to the numbers. Let’s say you are with someone who is a nine and you are only a four. If you say to someone, “No, I want to be a five,” and they say, “Then I am going to go down to an eight,” what are the numbers of five and eight? It is not five plus eight. That would be 13. Five times eight would be 40. Eight to the fifth power is 32,768. That is a lot more than nine to the fourth power, which is 6,561.

Going up one number can increase the ultimate total effect that the two of you will have once you synergize, even if the other person goes down one number. If you exponentially make them better with the quality of your thoughts and feelings, it is worth the sacrifice.

But again, you have got to get back together with people. When you say to them, “I have to take care of me first,” are you worth it? Are you a good investment for them to say, “I am going to make a sacrifice for you to become better, because we will get back together”?

In taking care of yourself, I tell people you have to make sure you are doing your dominant function for seven to eight hours a day, your auxiliary function for three to four hours a day, your tertiary function for two to three hours a day, and your inferior function for only one to two hours a day.

If your lifestyle does not afford you that luxury to get yourself to a high-quality state when you synergize with people, only change your lifestyle 10% at a time, and make sure it is in three-week increments.

You need to go into your life and do an inventory. How much do you need to stop doing certain activities that are lower functions? How much do you need to increase your higher functions? Make sure the people in your life know that you are making changes that will be long-term good returns on their investments when they are making a sacrifice for you to say, “I have got to change my lifestyle now to do what is really healthy for me.”

Ten percent, out of a 16-hour day, is maybe half an hour at a time, or an hour, depending on what you are currently doing. Do not change your lifestyle so much so quickly that it will impact other people in a negative, harmful way. If you are honest with them and talk to them about what they can afford to sacrifice for you, that creates more positive energy, appreciation, respect, and trust. That is the basis of “synchronize to synergize.”

Negative emotions are not always a bad thing. Fear, anxiety, and anger are natural human activities. If you say to people, “I am anxious about something that could potentially happen. I am afraid of what is happening. I am angry about what has happened,” and you communicate with them and say, “I am not going to pretend that I do not have these feelings, because these feelings are going on inside of me, but I am going to address with you the issue of what caused them,” then you are being completely honest. You have taken care of yourself, so mentally and emotionally you are in a higher-quality state.

People will be very willing to talk to you if they see that you practice what you preach.

This is the most important thing: accept what people give you as a gift. If there is more joy in giving than in receiving, make sure you accept the giving that people want to share with you for that experience and that fulfillment. What if you do not need what they are giving? Maybe you do not want it. Accept it anyway, because it is not just the act or the object being bestowed upon you. It is a way that they are trying to become closer to you, to forge a connection with you.

That might not be anything right now, but it could be in the future. It is the foundation for something that could be long-term and much more high quality.

It is also important to remember things like breathing. When we inhale, that engages our sympathetic nervous system. When we exhale, that is our parasympathetic nervous system. You need to exhale four times more than you inhale. That will get your whole brain and nerves back in check, and you are going to think differently about things. That is important too.

Know that when you take care of yourself, you take care of others. That creates something very real and something very high quality over quantity.

Again, my website is life-synergy-coaching.com. I have my workbook, my life-coaching workbook. I also have a self-actualization program. I have Embrace Your True Nature, and I just put the marriage book that I am about to publish there. I already have the copyright, so you can go on the website for Till Death Do Us Part.

Thank you so much for listening to The Power of Synergy on BBS Radio. I’m Gabrielle Cardona. We’ll see you here at the same time next week on BBS.

Speaker 1 - Intro/Outro Song or Prerecorded Music Segment:
That’s the power of synergy. Sixteen ways to see the world. Every mind, a flag unfurled. What you think is black and white might be someone else’s light. Read between the lines they speak. There’s a strength inside the weak.

Not just who we show outside; there’s a deeper truth inside. If we learn to understand, we can finally take a stand. Not against, but side by side, with awareness as our guide. The power, the power of synergy. Understanding you and me. Every difference, every truth leads us back to something new. It’s the power we can be when we see what is underneath, not just words but energy.