00:09

Speaker 1
We are more than what we see. Every voice, every story holds a key. Together, we rise in synergy. Different faces, different pain. Different story, same refrain. Tryna find a place to stand. Tryna feel a guiding hand. What you say and what you mean. Left somewhere in between. Every action has a cause. Every heart behind the walls. If we listen, we can hear it. If we look, we can see it. There's a pattern in us all. Every piece can make us whole. The power, the power of synergy. Understanding you and me. Every difference, every truth leads us back to something new. It's the power we can be when we see what's ...

01:08

Speaker 2
Welcome to The Power of Synergy on BBS Radio. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach. I actually started out as a life coach, but people kept telling me, "That's too general. It's too ambiguous. You have to have an area of expertise, a specialty, a niche," right? Because there's a lot of life coaches out there, that could mean anything. Well, I thought about it, I was in business for about 15 years at this point, and I said, "Well, let me take an inventory of what people have been coming to me mostly for, generally." Everything from weight loss, um, making money, getting into a, a marriage, um, changing jobs, (laughs) uh, living with their relatives without wanting to kill them. You know what? A lot of what people needed, whether it was for personal or professional, financial or biological, health reasons, the relationships in their life. They were struggling with the people that they were working with and around and for. And I thought, "You know what?

02:17

Speaker 2
I could teach people how to be with people." That's a very good practical life skill. And a lot of people, no matter what the, the cause, the source of the cause of the effect of anything that they were struggling with, it really came back down to being healthy and happy with the people in their lives. Okay, so you know what? Let's be a relationship coach. Now, my son calls me a shrink in denial, but I'll tell you why. I don't agree with the mental health industry or the pharmaceutical industry in the United States because as industries, their motives and their intentions are financial. It's capitalism. Well, you know what? I don't wanna label people as mentally ill if they're not actually mentally ill. You know what? Most of the people who came to me initially said, "I'm, I'm sick. I'm ill. I'm mentally defective in some way. Fix me." You know what? I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen. Most people are not mentally ill.

03:20

Speaker 2
They're just very confused and they want practical advice on life, daily life activities, how to be healthy and happy and successful. So as a coach, I give people strategy and equipment and encouragement and support to help them score in the game of life. Yeah, but how do we do that? As a team. There we go, back to the synergy. Now, what is the definition of synergy? Okay, let's go ahead and pull it up on, let's see, Google. I think I have it here somewhere. It says, "Synergy is the interaction or cooperation of two or more agents, elements, organizations that produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate effects." Okay, (laughs) that means when we come together, we are exponentially more powerful. We don't add to each other, we augment each other. Okay, well that's, that's potentially exciting. That could be potentially very scary because I teach my clients three different principles. Number one, there's no neutral energy. You're either positive or you're negative.

04:36

Speaker 2
And unfortunately, most people, when they say, "Well, I don't care. I don't care one way or the other. I'm not good or bad." You know what? Actually, indifference is negative, because if you don't have good, healthy, positive energy that is affecting other people in a positive way, you are sustaining their negativity. Potentially even making it worse, because by telling them that you don't care about them, that does damage to them. The second thing I teach people is that there's no inertia. You are either moving forward, towards someone, backwards, away from them, or with them. You synchronize, then you synergize. Okay, you know what? I'm getting kind of caught up on this whole, well, not adding to people, but empowering, augmenting them. Let's just go ahead and put it in, in numbers, okay, in the context of numbers. Let's say every person has a value of a scale from one to ten, okay? Well, let's say one person is a two, one person is a three, ooh, one person is a seven, okay.

05:46

Speaker 2
You know what? Adding up, that's twelve. No. Two plus three plus seven, that's twelve to the third power, because when three people synchronize, they synergize. Twelve to the third power, that's 1,728. What could we do together?... proactively, successfully. Well, you know what? Not two, three, seven. What if the two says, "I wanna become a better person." Let's make it three. Plus three plus seven, that comes up to 2,197. That's a whole lot more. Yeah, that's 470 more just by making that personal improvement. You are adding to the group in an exponential way. Do you believe that your positive energy and the- the improved quality of your being, not just what you do, but how you're thinking and how you're feeling that empowers them to have more success in their life. Was it worth it? Yeah, absolutely. If you have three people (laughs) that are all nine, right? They're not quite perfect, but they're all almost there. 27 to the third power is 19,683.

07:06

Speaker 2
What can people get done if they work together, if what they're doing is high quality and it's in a large quantity and they stay synchronized and they continue to synergize with each other? The different things that can be done, not only in the world, but in their lives can be better and more. Well, okay, let's think about this. If we're talking about the principles of human interaction, there's no inertia and there's no neutral energy. There are principles of power that people sometimes don't really think about. Power means, yeah, you're gonna affect the people. You are gonna be responsible for what you do, responsible to them and responsible to the environment that you are participating with them in. Okay, that can be kind of scary when you think about that accountability. But you know what? If you have positive energy and you're inspiring people to be better versions of themselves, the improvements that you're making in the world are going to be priceless.

08:20

Speaker 2
You can't quantify things like that because they are high quality. There we go. Now, that's about being a better version of yourself. I want to give people good, healthy, very specific advice, not labeling them as mentally ill, but giving them very specific suggestions that they can put into immediate use, good use, effect in their life so that when they are doing things, they're not only doing more with more people, they're doing a better version of what they may have been trying to do, they just didn't understand certain things about it. So this is a call-in show. The number to the station is 888-627-6008. If you wanna ask a life coach, a relationship coach a question, you can go ahead and call in. We're gonna take a real quick break. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS Radio. I'm Gabrielle Cardona.

09:25

Speaker 3
... of synergy. 16 ways to see the world. Every mind a flag unfurled. What you think is black and white. Might be someone else's light. Read between the lines they speak. There's a strength inside the weak. Not just who we show outside. There's a deeper truth inside. If we learn to understand. We can finally take a stand. Not against but side by side. With awareness as our guide. The power, the power of synergy. Understanding you and me. Every difference, every truth leads back to something new. It's the power we can be. When we see what's underneath. Not just words but energy. That's the power of synergy. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

10:31

Speaker 2
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach who started out as a life coach, so when I give people specific advice about how to make their life better, oftentimes it's about how to make their connections, their relationships with other people better. Yeah, that's important. We need to get back together. If you wanna call in and ask me a question, ask for advice about something that you might have just been wondering about human relationships, but you know what? Books don't really explain it very well and most of the mental health industry, they answer your question with a question. So if you wanna know the difference between the advice that I give people and what most of the mental health industry in the United States, right? I understand that we're very different from the rest of the world when it comes to our approach to personal fulfillment. Yeah, the number is 888-627-6008.

11:37

Speaker 2
And my producer will answer the phone, so it won't be me answering, but he'll definitely pass your call over to me. Now, okay, if we're talking, like I said before, about being a better quality version of ourselves, some people call it self-actualization. Well, okay, that's actually reaching your fulfillment, your full capacity. It's manifesting who you truly are in the best possible way. Well, I explain to people there are three different activities that you can pursue.... and two different versions of them. There's having, there's doing, and there's being. There's more and there's better. Okay. Well, having more? Okay. That's, that's nice, but it's certainly not healthy. Having better? Well, it's still selfish. Well, how about doing, doing more? That could potentially be good, but only if it's in a positive way. How about doing better? There you go. Now, we're getting into something good, because we're considering how what we do affects other people. Having, doing. How about being?

12:52

Speaker 2
There we go. Being more, that means you have to learn. That requires discipline and focus and sacrifice, but how about being better? Now, that's about spirituality. It's about not being selfish. It's about having the wisdom and the insight. Well, you know what? Most of it just comes down to people knowing who they are, understanding themselves, so that they can go to people and say, "You know what? I wanna synergize with you, but I'm gonna be very honest. I'm good at some things (laughs) and I'm terrible at others," and that's okay, and that's what I tell my clients. Five different people can come to me with the exact same question, wanting the advice about the exact same issue or topic, and I would give them different advice simply based on their personality, because everybody has different strengths. They have different talents and abilities. They have gifts, but that also means they have certain weaknesses and struggles.

13:53

Speaker 2
So, it's best to do things in the most organic way for your personality. Okay. So now, when I tell people there's different letters to your personality, most people have heard of Myers-Briggs. They know that the four letters are either E or I, extrovert or introvert, as the first part of their personality. That's their social orientation. The second one is S or N, sensory or intuitive. The I went to introvert, so they use the second letter of that word. You're sensory or intuitive. That's how you gather information and what you focus on while you're doing that. The third letter is either T or F. You're either a thinker or a feeler. And the last letter is P, as in Paul, or J. You're a perceiver or you're a judger. Now, the fact is, (laughs) sometimes it's hard for me to give people that test, because their answer is always, "Well, I do both. I do all of those things." It's not about what you currently do. It's about what's easiest for you.

14:55

Speaker 2
If you wanna ask me a question about your personality, go ahead and give me a call. Again, 888-627-6008, because I'm just gonna kind of give it a real quick once-over. The four different letters, yeah, everybody does some things in an introverted and some things in an extroverted way. Most people don't know that. Which one is simply the easiest for you? Everybody has to, in life, do sensory and intuitive things. You're not gonna make it very far if you, if you can't master both of those skills, the thinking and the feeling. Yeah, you're not, y- you're not gonna feel gratified and fulfilled in life if you can't maximize both of those activities. And you know what? When you're, when you're carrying out your decisions, you have to be perceptive, while you use your judgment. You have to do both of them. Again, which one is most important? I teach people about their functionality. Everybody does sensing and intuiting. They do thinking and feeling. It's about your functional order.

16:02

Speaker 2
Which one do you do most to least? Which one do you do in an introverted way? Which ones do you do in an extroverted way? Yeah, which one is the easiest for you? Which one is the hardest? There are four levels of functionality that most people don't know about, because not many MBTI books talk about it. So real quickly, you have your dominant function, your auxiliary function, your tertiary function, and your inferior function. You should spend six to eight hours a day doing your dominant function. You should spend three to four hours a day doing your auxiliary function, two to three hours a day doing your tertiary function, and one to two hours doing your inferior function. It is very important, ladies and gentlemen, that you know how to do everything, that you want to do everything, and you have the capacity to do everything. You just need to do some of them in an introverted way, two of them in an introverted way, and two of them in an extroverted way.

17:06

Speaker 2
Even if you're an introvert, you are gonna do certain things extrovertedly. And if you're an extrovert, yeah, some things are just gonna be introverted for you, and I'm g- I'm gonna explain those more specifically towards the end of this show. After you really understand how to determine your functionality, I'm gonna say it real quick, the last letter of your personality, either P or J, is going to tell you which of your two middle letters is extroverted, not which one you do most. If you're a P, your second letter of your personality is going to be extroverted. If you're a J, the third letter of your personality is gonna be extroverted. That means the other one is going to be introverted. Yes. That is very important to know. Which one is gonna be the extroverted one? Because if you're an extrovert, you're gonna wanna do that more. Wow. Okay.

18:05

Speaker 2
So, I'm gonna take a real quick break just for you to think about that for a minute, 'cause when we come back, I'm gonna explain personal self-care. It is very important to keep yourself in a high-quality state when you synergize with the people in your life.This is The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona.

18:28

Speaker 3
... loud. If we only slow it down. No more guessing who we are. We've been brilliant from the start. When we see with open eyes. We don't divide. We unify. It's the power. The power of synergy. Breaking walls and setting free. Every voice and every mind. Finally seen, finally aligned. It's the power, the truth we couldn't see. Now it's right in front of me. Not just people, destiny. That's the power of synergy. Every story. Every sound. Every loss can still be found. When we choose to truly see. We become synergy.

19:33

Speaker 2
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach, I'm a writer, I give presentations. Everything that I do as a relationship coach is about people coming together. How can people come together in a healthy way? That way they connect. When they connect, they synergize, and when they get together they can effectively be successful, not only with each other, but for each other. Yeah. Okay, so I was kind of explaining the overview of your functional order. Even if you are, let's say, an ENFJ, you're still gonna have to do S and T things that are not your personality preference. Okay, so as you, excuse me, as I explained in the, the previous segment that you're gonna have to do a certain number of hours, a certain amount of time spent on each of those different activities. Well, you know what? Sometimes people's lifestyle doesn't really afford them that luxury, so I teach them, then change your lifestyle.

20:45

Speaker 2
My first client literally said to me, we were standing in a, uh, public coffee shop, and he said, "What's a life coach?" I said, "Well, I, I teach people how to succeed by giving them strategy and equipment and encouragement." He said, "So you're a shrink?" I said, "No." (laughs) I give them very specific advice about how to modify their lifestyle to something that's conducive to their nature. And he said, "All right, look. I don't know what any of that means, but if you can tell me why I have an amazing job..." Yeah, he was a district attorney in a major, a large city. "Um, I have a lot of money." He did. He's very good with managing his money. "I have a great family." He grew up in a Mormon family, and they're amazing with their children. They have a great community. Uh, y- "And I'm good-looking." He was.

21:40

Speaker 2
(laughs) He said, "If you can tell me why my life is perfect on paper and I am not happy, I'll give you $60 an hour." Okay, now this was 20-plus years ago in Phoenix, and I thought, "Hmm, okay, that's not bad. I'd like $60 an hour." So I told him, "You know what? You're an INTJ. As a district attorney, you are doing things that are very socially interactive. You need to, to think. Your dominant function, yeah, it's actually intuition, which is processing information. That's different than the thinking, because that's making decisions. Right now what you're doing is a lot of thinking activity as a district attorney, but you need to be thinking about all of the things that you will eventually base your decisions on. That's intuition." And he said, "Oh my gosh, you're right. I've been living life like an extrovert. I'm an introvert!" Yes, okay. He ended up becoming a professor. A legal professor? Yes, he was teaching people how to become lawyers.

22:47

Speaker 2
That meant he was sitting and thinking for five to six hours, and then talking to kind of no one, 'cause it was a class, for two to three hours daily. That was perfect, because that gave him enough time to really engage his natural functions. So then when he had to do sensing and feeling things, he only needed to do them for a total of three to four hours a day while he was spending 10 to 12 hours a day doing the things that his personality loved. That's what mattered. Yeah. Then you know what? Nothing in his life logistically changed. I mean, the job, but he had the exact same lifestyle when he wasn't at work. He was just doing something that was natural for him. Now, I tell people there are some self-care principles. We've all seen that, that metaphor of when you're on the airplane, if you're traveling with small children, put the mask on yourself first before you help anybody else. Obviously, because if you don't have the mask on, you're gonna die, okay?

23:54

Speaker 2
So common sense, yes, don't die while you're helping other people. Unfortunately in the United States, it became something very unhealthy. It was almost to the point of I'm going to neglect taking care of other people to put myself first. As a general philosophy, that devolved into, "I am more important than you, and I am absolutely fine ignoring you, abandoning you, and neglecting you to take care of myself." Ladies and gentlemen, no.That's not healthy, and it's not productive, and it's not beneficial to you or the people that you're walking away from. When you have self-care as your primary focus, it needs to be with the ultimate ulterior motive intention of in order to save lives, in order to help other people. You have to have others because there is more joy in giving than in receiving. You just wanna give them a high-quality version of you. Yes. If you have questions, you wanna call in, the number is 888-627-6008.

25:07

Speaker 2
Now, okay, the fallacy of me first is just based on the fact that it devolves into instead of you altogether, to the omission and rejection and denial of you. No. If you are going to take care of yourself to become a higher quality version of yourself, that means that when you do reengage with the people in your life, you are gonna be an amazing version of what you currently are, a better version, actually, of what you might not even realize you could be. If you get your personality profile, you might be pleasantly surprised to learn you have a capacity to do phenomenal things in an even more phenomenal way that you never knew before. It's about staying centered. When I was a little girl and I was in ballet and we couldn't quite do all the, the moves, we couldn't quite execute all of the, the dancing and, uh, we couldn't even stand at the barre and do the, the leg work, pun intended, without falling over, my teacher never said, "Get balanced.

26:25

Speaker 2
You need to rebalance." She said, "Get centered." That meant the core of where you were carrying your weight needed to be at the base of your stomach. That meant when your arms and your legs were going everywhere else, your weight still stayed steady and still in the same place around the core of your center. Do you know how to get yourself centered? Well, you know what? Different personalities need different kinds of activities and they need to take different approaches. Wow. Okay. So now let's get into the specifics. We're gonna take another quick break. But again, if you wanna call in and ask a specific question about the things that I'm discussing or about relationships, the number is 888-627-6008. We'll be right back. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS.

27:22

Speaker 1
Same words, different meaning. Same moment, different scene. You think it's them. They think it's you. But there's a deeper point of view. You said it straight, they took it wrong. Now you're wondering what went on. Same sentence, different weight. Now you're standing in debate. You call it honest, they feel hit. You move fast, they need to sit. You think silence means they don't care. They think space means you're aware. It's not the words, it's how they land. It's not the fight, it's what they can explain in ways you recognize 'cause you're not seeing through their eyes. That's the power, the power of synergy. Understanding what you don't see. Same words but a different code. Different minds on a different road. That's the power.

28:24

Speaker 2
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach, and I write, I give presentations, but I have clients that sometimes they just wanna know how to be healthy and happy, not only in their life activities, but with the people in their life. So what I've been explaining to people is that you have to be a very high quality version of yourself, and sometimes, unfortunately, people are very confused about what it means to take care of yourself first. Unfortunately, they've come to the misunderstanding that that means at the expense of everyone else. You cannot become a better version of yourself if you're getting comfortable thinking that helping others is, by definition, inherently in and of itself bad for you. No, it's not. Taking care of other people is very good. There's more joy in giving than in receiving. It's just a matter of not taking care of them at your own expense. Okay, well, let's think about that.

29:38

Speaker 2
Now, your personality, there are certain things that you just need to do as a general lifestyle that are gonna be healthy for you that's very different from the other people in your life. And if you understand their personality and appreciate the levels of function, dominant, auxiliary, tertiary, and inferior, and you appreciate the different activities, sensing, intuiting, thinking, and feeling, and the fact that they are introverted and extroverted. Yes, extroverts still do two introverted activities, and introverts still perform two of the activities in an extroverted way. Okay, so really get to yourself and say, "Now, with the ulterior motive, the eventual goal of taking care of myself..."... to be with, to, and for others in a high-quality way, because I wanna synergize with them, I want to empower them. Yeah, every good quality can potentially evolve into a bad one with your motives and your intentions and your abilities less than ideal quality.

30:50

Speaker 2
Okay, so what if you, you really have to be honest with yourself and say, "You know what? I am a really toxic version of myself right now, so any help that I give you, it's gonna be damaging. It's gonna be destructive to you. Please let me take care of myself." And yes, what I will make in the way of improvement will be good for you eventually in the final product of what we are with and for each other. Okay. Now, when you have a hard time being centered, (laughs) getting yourself centered, because your lifestyle might not be conducive to your functional order. You know what? When you say to people in your life, "I need to literally remove myself from this situation altogether. I need to get my heart and my mind and my body all in alignment," do you know what gets that for you, what creates that for you? Find out what those things are. Everybody is different, and if you tell people, "You know what? I... Mm-hmm, yeah, I, I...

32:01

Speaker 2
This is what I need, and this is how I need it, and this is when I need it, and this is how much I need it," people love it when you're honest with them, because most of the time what you're asking of them, it's not anything excessive or extravagant or unrealistic. They would appreciate very much knowing the honest truth about you and what you need. Again, the number to the station if you wanna call in and ask questions about these topics, 888-627-6008. Now, getting yourself centered, yeah, you can say, "I, I need to figure out the topic, the issue, and the problem." The only way you can do that is literally removing yourself from the, the current situation. Once you have that personal space, okay, you know what? How about giving yourself some affirmation? Yeah, you can talk to yourself in a positive way.

33:03

Speaker 2
Learn which affirmations are the best, the most helpful to you, for you, and say them out loud as many times as you need to to brainwash yourself, literally, into a new state of mind. That's very effective. Okay, well, how about having a support system? You know what? This is so great. Different people in your life, they want to give to you. The most, I would say, common mistake that people make is they just go to the wrong people for the kind of help that they need. I'll give you some examples. There's emotional support, there's moral support, there's mental support, and there's physical support. Some people, they're called intuitive feelers, they are amazing at emotional support. How about mental support? Intuitive thinkers. Yeah, they can help you get your mind focused. Okay, well, how about moral support? Those are sensory judgers. They absolutely help you remain firm and strong and stable.

34:09

Speaker 2
And then physical support, SPs, they are the absolute perfect manifestation of good quality physical strength and energy, and if you say to them, "I want some of that in my life, will you share some of that with me?" they would love it. Okay, so if you know the support system that you might not even realize you have in your life, you reach out to it, you employ it. Yeah. Okay, well, how about, uh, just giving yourself a shot in the arm? You know what? You're, you're having a very low energy, and you need a good shot in the arm. Know what things in life are going to be good for you, something that recharges you, that does give you the motivation and the compensation for what you're doing that you might hate. You might hate to do that.

35:03

Speaker 2
But if you know that you have the mindset of doing these things, getting centered with, um, affirmations and your support system, giving yourself a shot in the arm, that in the end what you are going to do and be for people is going to be so much higher quality. They will know that, and especially if you tell them just straight out from the very beginning, "These are the things that I struggle with sometimes," or, "When I do have a certain situation, these are the ways that I deal with those things," they appreciate and respect, and they trust you for being direct and honest and mature. Yeah, that's really... That's priceless. That's the foundation of a relationship. And again, if you have the ultimate focus, the ulterior motive agenda of anything that you take from people, you will return twice, either in quality or in quantity. You won't feel bad asking for help, that kind of help from people. Now, think about that. We're gonna take another real quick break.

36:16

Speaker 2
The number to the station is 888-627-6008. If you have questions about what that might look like in your life, feel free to call in. We're gonna take another quick break, and when we come back, let's get together with people. This is The Power of Synergy on BBS.

36:39

Speaker 4
... about wrong, not about fixed. It's about reading what's underneath. That's the power of synergy. You read the moment, miss the mind. You judge the move, ignore the design. Every action has a base. Every person has a pace. 16 ways to take it in. 16 ways to lose a win. What feels normal in your frame. To someone else is not the same. You stop reacting, start to see. There's a pattern to identity. And when you learn the way they move. You know exactly what to do. That's the power, the power of synergy. Understanding what you don't see. Same words but a different code. Different minds on a different road. That's the power. When it all aligns. You stop guessing, start reading signs. It's not surface, it's energy. That's the power of synergy.

37:39

Speaker 2
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach. I started out as a life coach until someone said, "You know what? You have to have a specific focus. You're like a general practitioner. You need to have a- an area of expertise." So, when I looked at my history of life coaching, the repetitive theme, the constantly coming up issue for my clients was the people in my life. "I- I don't know how to be with the people. It's affecting my work, it's affecting my health, it's affecting my money, it's affecting... Yeah, I- I need to get together with the people in my life and I need to be healthy and happy while I'm with them." Yeah, okay. Well, I like acronyms. It helps my clients remember what I teach them, so I talk about the art of AIM. A-R-T of A-I-M. Yeah, aiming, where you're gonna shoot something, where you're gonna land, where you're gonna ultimately, um, arrive. It's an art. I always say A-R-T is appreciation, and respect, and trust.

38:58

Speaker 2
That's absolutely vital in relationships, they're not optional. Well, A-I-M is ability, intentions, and motives. People need to appreciate others' abilities. They need to respect their intentions. They need to trust their motives. That's the only way they will be able to synchronize, to synergize, truly unified to make proactive progress. And connection, meaningful connection with the people in their life that they want to love, that they want to be with. They're just- something is just not working. What is not working? (laughs) And I've always told my mom, she took me to mental health professionals when I was very young, apparently I was unfixable. I'm not crazy and I'm not mentally ill, I'm just weird. You know what, ladies and gentlemen, when I was eight years old and my teacher gave us an MBTI, um, profile? I found out as an INTP, I'm about 3% of the human population. So yeah, I was very, very exceptionally different in a very rare, minor part of the population. And that was okay.

40:14

Speaker 2
Wow, what a relief. I'm so glad there's nothing wrong with that. Now, if we really get together with people and understand that some people are just gonna be a very rare personality type, or they're going to have certain experiences that modify the way they display their personality. Whoa, wait a minute, that's even more interesting because you know what? Again, the exact same behavior can mean very different things when they are performed, when they are displayed by different personalities, because there's the ability, there's their intention, there's their motivation. When you take the time to really appreciate and respect and trust those things, that's when you can form a good, healthy, solid connection. That's when you synchronize and that's when you synergize. Okay, so let me ask you something. And it's just, go ahead and rhetorical. Ask yourself, what would you say is worse? What is more destructive for people, doing what you're not or not doing what you are?

41:20

Speaker 2
People- people really don't understand how important it is when I tell them, "You have got to do your functions of your personality to a certain degree, in a certain proportion, and in a certain way." They don't really wanna believe that because they've said, "Well, you know what? I've made it this far in my life and this is what I've been doing," but how is that working for you? What's worse, doing what you're not or not doing what you are? Well, you know what, it's kinda hard to know because they're happening at the same time. And so they might kind of overlap and they might (laughs) seem like the same thing, but they're really not. Now, think about this. Logistically, again, w- when you are doing something that's not you, you are depriving others the opportunity to do that particular activity that might be them. When you do things that are not true to your nature, you're taking away the opportunity for someone who does have that nature to do that activity, to perform that function.

42:26

Speaker 2
But then, not doing what you are is like suffocating yourself. You're actually depriving the world of your gifts and talents and strengths and abilities. You have the opportunity to make the world a better place, because if you're doing your dominant function-The beautiful thing about your dominant function is it's so easy for you, it's automatic. And you do it so well, you don't ever even have to be taught how to do it, and it brings you so much pleasure that you don't need any compensation. That's why you can do it for seven or even eight hours a day and it does not drain you. It does not, again, require a lot of practice. You don't need to recover. Yeah, when you're doing your dominant function, you are being a very high-quality version of you, because it's not about having and it's not necessarily about doing. It's about being organic. That's the real level of personal fulfillment. You are being natural to who you are, true to your true nature for other people.

43:42

Speaker 2
Then you're also simultaneously giving them permission to be what is the most natural and organic thing for them. If you wanna call in and ask a question, the number to the station is 888-627-6008. Now, as a coach, I teach people not only how to be healthy and happy in their organic nature, yeah, but I also teach them how to let other people do it too when you are a very good high-quality version of yourself. I tell them, "You know what? Positive is more powerful than negative." Okay, wait a minute now. (laughs) Not everyone agrees with that. Now, think about this. Uh, w- if you have positive energy and the people around you are negative, yeah, you know, one of two things is gonna happen. They're either going to be motivated and inspired by your good-quality energy and your, your healthy behavior, and they're gonna wanna join you. Wow, yes! And they would say, "Okay.

44:50

Speaker 2
What do I have to do to be part of your life, to be involved in your activities?" Or they are gonna be so irritated by you that they're gonna say, "I'm going somewhere else, and I'm finding other unhealthy, negative, destructive people like me who are gonna continue to let me be destructive and harmful to the people in their lives as well." Okay, you know what? That's not a joke. (laughs) Again, even indifference is very negative. You have to make sure that when you are doing something quality, yeah, it's very, very inspirational and motivational. Okay, so we're gonna take one more break, and this last part, I'm gonna explain what all of these different activities are in very specific ways. The number again is 888-627-6008. This is BBS Radio, and I'm Gabrielle Cardona.

45:55

Speaker 5
It's about understanding them. It's not about winning arguments. It's about knowing what matters to them. You want better relationships? Then read deeper. You want real change? Start with you. Same words, different meaning. Same truth, different seeing. Not conflict, misread signs. Different wiring, different minds. That's the power. The power of synergy. Where awareness becomes clarity. Every difference finally makes sense. Now you move with intelligence. That's the power. The shift you feel. When you finally see what's real. Not reaction, but strategy. That's the power of synergy. Not guessing, not reacting. Understanding that synergy.

47:02

Speaker 2
Welcome back to The Power of Synergy on BBS. I'm Gabrielle Cardona, a relationship coach, and I teach people about how to be true to their nature. Yeah, actually being organic, not only in what they do, but how they do it and why they do it. (clears throat) And now I explained to people about their functional order of their personality. Yeah, I, I went into a little bit of detail about the different levels of function earlier in the show. There's dominant, auxiliary, tertiary, and inferior. You need to do all of the activities, even the ones that are not your personality. They are not your personal preference, your initial motivation, but you're still gonna have to do them. So it's important to understand that when you are doing things that are not your nature, two things are happening. You are inhibiting the manifestation of who you are in a healthy way, but you're also taking away the opportunity for someone for whom that activity is their true nature to experience it.

48:09

Speaker 2
You are depriving them that experience, and you, you can't be doing that and expecting a, a positive outcome, a healthy outcome. Okay, well, there are four activities that people have to perform: the sensing, intuiting, thinking, and feeling. And there are two different ways each of them can be performed, in an introverted and an extroverted way. So, now let's just go, uh, down. I'm gonna use different personalities as examples going down the ladder, and all of the different functions, thinking about what they are. Okay, so let's talk about extroverted sensing.You know what? An ESTP, their extroverted sensing is their dominant function. It is like breathing for them. They have to do physical activities in a social way for eight hours a day. Okay, well, an ENFJ, they're not sensory, but their sensing activity is still extroverted, and it's on a tertiary level for them. That means when they're being sensing in an extroverted way, they're being socially stimulated.

49:21

Speaker 2
It's kinda challenging for them, so you need to be patient with them. (laughs) And very, very, um, shall we say, forgiving (laughs) when they're having a hard time. Okay, how about introverted sensing? You know what? For an ISTJ, yeah, that's a dominant function. They are introverted sensing. That means they need to be doing a lot of activities, but not interacting with people unless it's people that they're very, very close to, and that they have a very profound connection with, because it's their dominant function. Well, for an INTP, yeah, introverted sensing, that's tertiary. That's almost the bottom of their list. Don't talk to them when they're cutting vegetables. They're gonna cut their hand. (laughs) Okay. Yes. They're, as an intuitive, they don't wanna do sensory things, and that's okay, because it's not the, uh, inclination of their true nature. Okay, well, how about introverted intuition? An ENTJ, yeah, their thinking is extroverted because of the J.

50:29

Speaker 2
That means their intuition is introverted, but it's auxiliary. They don't have to do it as much as they do their thinking activities, but when they're having an intuitive moment, make sure you take a step back. Okay, well, you know what? For an ESFP, that introverted intuition is in inferior function. It is so hard for them. It is like running uphill barefoot in the snow, because as a sensory perceiver, they wanna do all kinds of sensing things with all kinds of people. When you literally tell them, "No, no, no. Stop what you're doing. Go somewhere alone and think about things that you're not gonna do," oh, my God, you are suffocating them. Do not do that to them for more than about an hour a day, okay? (laughs) How about extroverted intuition? Well, you know what? An ENFP, they have that as a dominant function. They are thinking about things in a profound way with a whole bunch of people to inspire them and motivate them to become something exceptionally phenomenal, hypothetically.

51:36

Speaker 2
What? You know what? An ESFJ, that's tertiary. Okay. They, they can do that. But please don't do- ask me to do it for very long, 'cause I'll burst into flames and die, (laughs) okay? You know what? Yeah. They, they wanna try, but they might even actually learn how to be good at it, the ESFJ, but they still shouldn't do it for too long. Okay? Introverted thinking, yeah. As an INTP, that's my dominant function. If I'm on a train of thought, do not interrupt me. And that would be for about eight hours a day, because that's why I can be amazing with my clients, for about two to three hours a day. Well, for an INFJ, it's tertiary, so they can do it, but again, you know, it's gonna have to be with some kinda compensation. (laughs) Okay. Extroverted thinking, an ESTJ, it's their dominant function. When they're doing sensory judger activities, they want to be logical and rational and brilliant and objective. Yeah.

52:41

Speaker 2
And they need to do that for about seven, eight hours a day, just to make it through the day. Whereas an INFP, you know what? Their introverted feeling is their dominant function. Extroverted thinking is like speaking Arabic. They almost don't even understand the language. How about feeling? Introverted feeling. Well, for an ESFP, that's auxiliary. They can do introverted feeling activities one-on-one with someone that they love in a beautiful way, but not too long. They, they need to get back to their intuition. Well, for an INTJ, introverted feeling is tertiary. So as long as they're doing it in an introverted way with their intuition, there you go. They can be very generous and loving, but not for too long. Well, how about extroverted feeling? An ENFJ, it's their dominant function. They can give and give and give all day, every day, and it would never take anything out of them. But for an ISTP, it's inferior, and you know what?

53:47

Speaker 2
(laughs) I'm gonna need something with alcohol when I'm done. (laughs) Okay? Know the people in your life. Understand the people in your life, and make sure you give them what they need. Ladies and gentlemen, that's what I teach people. Synergize. Know the people in your life. Get together with them. Be the best quality version of yourself, and let them be that too. Yeah. Go ahead and check out my website. It's life-synergy-coaching.com. And again, if you wanna go ahead and call in for the show, the number is 888-627-6008. If you didn't hear the show, you can always listen to the archives. Thank you so much for listening to the radio show. And again, with the new day and time, I'm giving people a, a good opportunity to adjust and to catch up. I'll be giving people, um, the latest announcement about the new day and time. But really, there's no neutral energy, people. You get to be a good, high-quality version of yourself. And there's no inertia. Move with people in your life.

55:03

Speaker 2
And there's accountability for your power. Use your power in a positive way. You're making the world a better place. We'll see you same time here next week on BBS Radio. I'm your host, Gabrielle Cardona.

55:23

Speaker 1
We are more than what we see. Every voice, every story. Holds a key. Together, we rise. In synergy. Different faces, different pain. Different stories, same refrain. Tryna find a place to stand. Tryna feel a guiding hand. What you say and what you mean. Life's somewhere in between. Every action has a cause. Every heart behind the walls. If we listen, we can hear it. If we look, we can...