Speaker 1 – Host:
Awakening Matters covers all kinds of topics—everything from your consciousness to your humanity, to your physicality, to your hall of records, your full contract, and so much more. Awakening Matters is not here to say anything other than: contemplate this. If it resonates, make it your own. If it does not, let it be.

But know that if you are drawn here today, for whatever reason, there is something in this body of work that is more for your heart than it is for your head. If you are listening from your head, you may be blocking the heart’s message, so be mindful of that.

For those who do not know, I have the honor and deep humility of working with God, spirit, guides, and the records to offer everything from energy balancing to healing, restoration, completion, and things connected to the other side. Really, whatever has been asked of me from my own inner dialogue is something I communicate with daily.

In that dialogue, because, in my opinion, I am only as good to others as I am willing to look at myself, I recognize that I am only expecting things from others when I am not doing the work myself. When the work is done, we do not always need to use the word “work.” We can replace it with love.

When I am loving myself and seeing things clearly for myself about me—not just looking at others and pointing the finger, but actually looking within myself to see what is being mirrored—it always brings me back around to this dialogue with my guides, my higher self, my soul, and my inner wisdom. That thought, I think, is worthy to share here, because it may be something that can be shared with others, or with yourself.

Basically, I was talking to my students about problems—not necessarily my problems, but problems in general—and what spirit said was fascinating, empowering, and, to me, awakening.

When there is a problem, whether it is a universal problem, a personal problem, or any problem anywhere, certainly things need to be done in order to transmute those problems and create help where help is needed. However, the consciousness of the universe was saying to me that if there is a big problem in the world, and everyone is focused on that problem—everyone meaning as many beings as disagree with what is happening, as an example—they are feeding and fueling that problem.

That problem is not only getting fed, but as it is being fed by energy, attention, focus, interaction, and so on, more payoff and drama are created. Why? To create more attention.

We are talking about an energy interaction. We are talking about a vibrational frequency. I am talking about the fact that we are all connected to the core of energetic frequency. We are part of a vibrational frequency, an electromagnetic force field. It carries so much. It carries conversations, which I will get into in a moment, and we are all part of it.

As we focus upon what we do not want to happen, we start engaging in depletion. We start feeling disempowered. We start feeling that we cannot affect that big world problem, and we focus more and more on the problem. What happens is that the problem begins consuming your life force, consuming your energy, consuming your vitality, and starting to convince you that this is the only way to go.

The universe was talking and saying, “Who owns your joy? Who owns your well-being? Who owns your love?”

When I inquired further, it was shown to me that so often in humanity, myself included, there is the thought: “When that problem gets fixed, I will feel at peace. When that person goes away, I will feel free. When that issue is seen by others, and seen clearly, then I can feel in love again.”

The whole point is: who owns those parts of you? You are not owning them. You are giving them away to the areas you want fixed, or to the areas you hope will be fixed. You are not honoring your value, your worth, in a way that says, “If a problem is owning my joy, there is no solution. I am waiting for that problem to clear up before I know the well-being I already am.”

It is not about not having problems. We are in a dimension of duality. That is always going to be the case. So I will take my joy back. I will take my well-being back. I will take back the clarity of not only who I am, but that I am. I will fall back into love with myself completely and fully.

I will know that the problem I once said had to clear up before I could feel peace does not actually own my peace. I can begin to feel at peace even if that problem is still there.

I say that because, for centuries, even our ancestors believed we had to fix the problems, and then everyone could breathe. I am not saying problems will not exist. Of course, there are more problems right now in the world than ever. The key is that I do not want to focus all of my life force on the problem. Why? Because I want more of my life force renewing and regenerating itself within me, and less of it feeding and fueling a problem.

The key is to know that you have access to peace, to healing, and to love. You are the love you are seeking. You are the power you are seeking. You are the light you are seeking. You are the fullness and the wholeness you are seeking.

Then we come to this question: do you want to choose fear or love? Fear equals disease, and literally disconnects you from yourself. Love equals healing, restoration, and miracles, which I have experienced many times in my life.

So what I say to you is this: regardless of your belief system, just for a second, contemplate this. Hear me out.

We all come from oneness, from wholeness. We all knew each other there. In that oneness and wholeness, we felt so much peace. We felt oneness, so there was no need for contrast. There was just this yummy oneness. Stay with me—yummy, yummy oneness.

So we are there in that yummy oneness, feeling oh so good, and then we move into individualization. What does that mean? It means we leave that oneness, and all of a sudden we are in a body.

Let us fast-forward. We are in a body, and all of a sudden, not necessarily organically, but through what we have been told for centuries by ancestors and others, we are told there is a problem. Wait a second—I am no longer part of the whole. I am separate. Wait, what?

All of a sudden, there is the introduction of fear, the introduction of duality, the introduction of fear or love. You come from pure divine love, the highest love, whatever you want to call it or however you want to define it. Then you move into individualization, where all of a sudden you are here to experience yourself and others. There is a false belief that we are disconnected—not only disconnected from the One, but disconnected from the peace we once felt.

Then what starts happening, consciously or unconsciously, is this: “If I am not part of the wholeness anymore, how do I know that I am my own essence? How do I know that I am that love from the oneness? If I am not there, and I am in a body, how do I know now that I am worthy? How do I validate that?”

All of a sudden, you are looking at people as separate from you. Some long to have the feeling of connection. They question their worth and how to get back to that feeling. Often, they look outside themselves for that feeling. They look to each other, to a project, to a dream, or to a goal.

None of that is bad or wrong. In fact, none of it is bad or wrong. It is all part of duality. But the core of connection remains. That is what I am here to say. The core of who you are remains.

I am saying this because I have lived it, and I am living it now. The core of who I am, who I have always been, and who I will continue to be forever, is connected to that oneness. After working on this my entire life, I arrived at the knowing that I never left that wholeness. It exists within me. It exists within you. You are giving it a different deal, a different expression, but you did not lose anything when you left the wholeness and moved into a sense of separation, or the illusion of it.

What happens is that we are taught, shown, told, and trained to look outside ourselves for that connection, when that connection was never broken.

What connection am I talking about? Your intuition. Your wisdom. Your guidance. Your connection to all that is. My ability to talk to a tree in my own backyard. My ability to talk to the sacred geometry in the ocean and hear what it is saying about its oxygen level and those who use it as home. My ability to go into meditation, leave my body, fly over mountainous regions, communicate with them, and feel their presence and my presence as one. And so on and so forth.

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To be at peace with that, in my opinion, is to know that how somebody relates to you has everything to do with how they relate to themselves. They will not even be able to hear you, see you, understand you, or communicate with you if they are running from themselves. If they are not willing to turn and face themselves, it may be because they are terrified that what they always thought they were is still there, and they have not done the work to make it all the way through.

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Do I see birds fighting? Sure I do. Does that mean there is a lack of love? No, not in the bird. The birds are having their experience, but the love that dwells within never leaves.

When you know that and hold that, whatever struggle is knocking on your door, you do not open it on your knees. And even if you do, that is okay. You open it from a place of clarity, from a place of choice, from a place of truth, knowing that anyone else in the entire world can carry any truth about you that they choose. If it is not what your experience has been, that is okay. They can have it.

Why? Because your clarity about who you are—why you are all of you, not just part of you, but all of you—is something you can celebrate and love so much that there is no opportunity for inner chaos to be jarred or taken away from you at all.

We move into this physical dimension. We move into the physical body, and we forget that we are part of an electromagnetic force field. Because sure, how does that work into your day? “I will have a tall coffee with electromagnetic love on the side.” That would be my order, and maybe I would love that, but other people may not relate to it that way.

What ends up happening is that the external world, if we are focused on it, becomes and feels—whether you are a toddler, a teenager, a young adult, or an older adult—louder and bigger. To some, it becomes proof that the external world of the so-called false separation between you and another person, between you and all that exists, is more real.

“No, wait a second. The separation is way louder and bigger. There is no way I am connected to something bigger than all of this, this whole world.”

Yes, there is.

Why do I say that? Because the dialogue of your body, the dialogue of your soul, the dialogue of your organs, the dialogue of your bloodstream, of your brilliant mind, and of your incredible parts are communicating outside of time and co-creating everything you are experiencing.

You get to choose how you are going to react. That is your personal growth, should you choose it.

God, divine love, whatever meaning you want to put on it—energy, electromagnetic fields, and so on—everything you give your power away to, even if you give all your power away to something, someone, or anything, you never give away access to you.

Let me put that differently: you are loved beyond measure, time, space, or place. When we remember that, we remember that this is a dimension of demonstration. Certainly, we have all felt that we have given ourselves away at times. Then the growth is in love, returning to ourselves with bigger clarity, with a bigger dialogue, with an inner dialogue that says, “Wow, I did that. Now I can see things differently.”

Your love for yourself grows, because you can only love another to the level and degree of your self-inquiry. If you are running from yourself, ignoring yourself, and you do not want to talk, see, or go within, you may say, “That is hard, and I just want to do the easy thing over here.” No problem. You are still loved. But your choices will bring the results those choices offer you, and that is okay too.

There are a lot of problems that we, as humanity, look at, and they offer us a choice: how do we want to react—with fear or with love?

Am I saying love a problem? No. I am saying love yourself instead of focusing only on the problem. Focus on the problem 10 percent of the time. Even if you want to focus on it 50 percent of the time, remember that this is your electromagnetic energy. So if you say, “Okay, I am going to give 50 percent of my energy to that problem,” fine. Then give the other 50 percent of your time and focus to yourself, falling deeply and madly back into love with yourself.

If you have never loved yourself because other people have taken over your script, your definition, or the way you speak to yourself, then when you finally hear yourself, you become so calm, so still, and so quiet in silence that you feel a fullness of being that brings tears to your eyes.

It really does. It is deeply needed when you are healing the body. It is absolutely needed when you are in the process of healing the body.

What I mean by that is, if you need to heal your body, you need to really focus on an energy of, “I am going to fall back into love and join the pure love from where I came, the love that dwells within me. I am going to join that, and I am going to expand it.”

I am going to have compassion for the people around me who are telling a different story about me, because I know that the story they are telling is often the story they are unconsciously telling themselves. I know that their ability to judge, to hate, to tear apart, or to create a false narrative around something has nothing to do with you, actually, and has everything to do with their own inner dialogue.

People will show you who they are. I am telling you: stop talking, stop trying, and change your focus onto yourself. Celebrate who you are and how you are. Get to love yourself so much that when you walk in this world and are present, even around those who hate you, you change the landscape. That is even better.

It is the reason you are here: to change the landscape, not to change people’s minds. It is to become at peace with changing your own mind.

I am saying that from the perspective of coming from this oneness, as an example only. If you do not believe that, change the wording and make it your own. When one comes from this oneness and then moves into individuality, which means being in this body, all of a sudden it can feel like, “Wait, I do not belong to the oneness anymore. I am separate.”

Some people have a desire to belong so greatly that they will falsify whatever they need to in order to belong to whatever they are focused on. I think that is part of the human journey. I really do, regardless of age. It is part of the plane of demonstration and duality.

There are also many who believe, “I am here on this earth plane, and at a certain point in time, I am going to get to a place in my life where there are no problems. I am going to solve something, leave this person, get away from that person, and solve my problems. Then I will not have any more problems, and I can just have fun.”

You are in the plane of demonstration. You are in an electromagnetic field of duality, and you will continue to experience whatever you choose to experience. But if you are doing it for a reason other than your soul contract, your soul evolution, and your reasons for being here, then ask yourself: what is your reason for being here?

Maybe it is the feeling, the very concept, of “When I get to a certain place in my life, or with other people, then I will be invited back in.”

Recently, it was fascinating to me because I was invited back in. I will just put this as a story. I was invited back into a consciousness, and people were attached to it. Let us put it that way. I met with those people, and this happens to so many people.

There is so much pain. They want to leave the pain. There is so much pain about what happened to them, or what caused the pain they are running from. Or they are so isolated that they want to get back in. “If I could just get back in that group, if I could just get back in that connection, if I could just reconnect with those people…”

Then you do all this inner work and soul evolution, and you have all these epiphanies. They are not just passing through; they are epiphanies that stay within you. You become them. You rise to the occasion. You go higher, and you rise to the occasion even further.

Then you meet with these people, and all of a sudden, you go completely silent. You are looking at them and saying to yourself, “First of all, wow, I feel so much love. I do not feel anything but love.” But you feel a quiet, resounding inner love that no longer needs to be seen, validated, part of this group, or seen by these people.

What do you realize? It is not an age thing. A lot of people say, “Oh, you get there when you are older.” No. I have many clients, and some of them are teenagers, who are far advanced on the path.

It is a place of freedom. You return to an inner place of freedom, and when you get to an inner place of freedom, you move into a sense of love. The way you will know it is an authentic place of inner freedom is that you will feel love, not hate, and not frustration. Those are signs that you still have more work to do.

But when you can stand somewhere where hate was offered to you, or where disconnection was offered to you, and you feel peace, self-love, and you can also extend that love, there is a detachment because love lives there. Then you move into freedom. Your soul evolution is flying. It is soaring higher and higher.

You return to the vision and version of you that is the source dwelling within you. Call it what you will. Your humanity does. Your personality does. Your emotional body does. Your human body does. Your soul is already there, but you return to that place.

Can people outside of that place see you? It does not matter anymore. It does not matter anymore. You are free. You are free to let others be, because you are dwelling from a place of inner connection. For some, that is a place they may never have reached or returned to.

There will be a time in your life, hopefully, when you are able to say, energetically, verbally, on the computer, or in any way you want, “I thank the people who challenged me. I thank them, because I returned to myself amplified.”

Let me tell you: when you no longer care what people say about you because you are so clear about who you are and how you are—all of you—there is a silence that can be heard like an ongoing language creating music in the universe.

Can other people hear it? It does not matter. Every step you take, you know that you are part of a higher orchestra. You know that you are a note in an orchestra that never stops playing. Why? Because nature never stops communicating and trying to repair herself. Ever.

I saw a short video the other day, and I wish I could credit the person. It was magnificent and brilliant. This is not verbatim by any means, but it was very impactful.

Listen: birds were created to fly. They do not need a manual. They do not need recognition. They do not need validation. They do not need to look to the birds on their left and right and say, “Okay, can I fly?” No. There is no manual. There is an inner knowing. You were created to fly. Fly.

Fish do not need a manual. They do not need a group of people saying, “We do not know if you can swim.” What I am talking about is the individualization of all forms, and the connectedness to original truth. A fish does not look for a manual or a group, or someone saying, “Yeah, I guess it is okay. You can swim.” It was created to swim. It is going to swim.

A fish is not going to try to fly, and a bird is not going to try to swim. A rose is not going to try to be the grass, because it was created to be a rose, and the grass was created to be grass.

You were created with a purpose. You were created with a purpose. There is no need to look for a manual in the hands of others, because they will hand you their manual instead of your own, whether they do that with an ill heart or a good heart.

You have a purpose, and you were created for that. I can say this of almost everyone on the earth plane, the entire earth, all species, all beings, all forms. By the way, everything is alive. Everything is communicating with and aware of its purpose here. Every small, infinitesimal point and every large aspect has a reason and a purpose.

If you are looking for a manual and it belongs to another, reconnect with your purpose.

I believe we are all here to walk each other home. We are all here to love each other. We are all here to support each other and to be part of this abundant universe. But you have to do that for yourself first in order to receive that from others.

Can you ask for what you need? Absolutely. But make sure you are asking for what you need from an individual who is doing their own inner work, who is not just focused externally but is focused internally, and who is able to tell themselves the truth about who they are.

You doing your work—or, I am going to change the word “work” again—you loving yourself reconnects you with the source that dwells within you. It is available to you at all times, never not fueling you, directing you, guiding you, loving you, and providing for you. The presence of that energy, that light, that frequency surrounds you and is so big with every step you take.

You are part of an orchestra that continues to create the most exquisite language heard by all beings on the earth plane. If your purpose is to lean in and hear the truth about yourself, you are meant to remember your essence. You are love, personified and manifested, and you are meant to be celebrated.

You have a purpose, and that is to fall madly and deeply in love with yourself. Allow yourself to question every thought for a while. “Is that a loving thought toward me? No. I release it. I replace it with love. Is this a loving choice? No, it is not. I release it. I replace it with a loving choice. What does that look like?”

So I say to you: whether you remember it or not, you are part of a tapestry of light and love that created itself to experience your view.

Know that you are worthy. Know that you are loved beyond measure. Know that even if you are abandoned by everyone, you are not going to abandon yourself. You are going to come home to yourself. How do you do that? By loving yourself.

You can go to my website simply at Sloan9.com.

I thank you so much for joining me tonight. I wish blessings upon blessings for any chaos to be calibrated and moved into an illuminated energy of love. Bye for just now. Thank you.